FabSwingers.com forum: Saying no politely because I'm a slut?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I like it when I'm rejected politely, something along the lines of - I don't think we're a good match or I'm looking for something a bit different from you. I've never felt compelled to have to know more than that. Or to berate the person who has turned me down. Why do some people do this? What is the goal? I've been called a slut for not meeting men I didn't want to meet, this irony isn't lost on me. Or I'm frequently told something along the lines of- you're on this site to fuck so why won't you fuck me? How do you all deal with this?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The block button, a good sense of humour & real men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be quite honest some men are just idiots or is it most men

however the case no excuse for that treatment! Block button, report them or just ignore and move on, they are just idiots.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Block and move on ,try not to take it personally .Some people show their true colours when you decline their advances and count yourself lucky you didn't agree to meet those morons .As we always say -NEXT

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im almost 2 years on this site ive never blocked anyone as much as i have wanted to at times I just ignore and move on works for me

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've been resistant to use the block button. Perhaps I need to reconsider this, thank you all for the advice. One of my favourite lines has been something along the lines of - what do you want? To be Facebook friends?

Hahahaha

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By *auraLucyLuLuWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"I like it when I'm rejected politely, something along the lines of - I don't think we're a good match or I'm looking for something a bit different from you. I've never felt compelled to have to know more than that. Or to berate the person who has turned me down. Why do some people do this? What is the goal? I've been called a slut for not meeting men I didn't want to meet, this irony isn't lost on me. Or I'm frequently told something along the lines of- you're on this site to fuck so why won't you fuck me? How do you all deal with this?"

I've encountered similar experiences to yourself and I'm left scratching my head at people sometimes but things came to a head for me the other night on kik where I accepted a conversation and was verbally abused and was threatened with violence and they got so nasty I deleted my kik... I can only assume it was from a disgruntled fabber whom I turned down previously ...

Anyway it's a lesson learned for me and I'm more careful now who I chat to.

Happy fabbing x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It way of them handling their rejection by calling names like that.not very mature but they all brave on keyboards.ignore or block and move on.they wont go far here or anywhere.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

That is awful, I'm so sorry that happened to you.

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By *hoosyhotwifeCouple
over a year ago

any

I've always found the bigger the mouth, the smaller the cock...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It way of them handling their rejection by calling names like that.not very mature but they all brave on keyboards.ignore or block and move on.they wont go far here or anywhere."

This.

Some men can only take rejection through reconciling in their brain that you are the one with the problem and not them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im still trying to figure this out, tried doing the polite " sorry im not interested " and got so much abuse, like im not everyones cup of tea but id rather cut off my own hands rather than reduce my self to nonsense i had to listen too

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By *auraLucyLuLuWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"That is awful, I'm so sorry that happened to you. "

Thanks but it hasn't deterred me just made me more cautious.. And the block button on here will now be my new friend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My block list is longer than my friends list and hotlist combined!!

(

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My block list is longer than my friends list and hotlist combined!!

(

Love this lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We men all have egos to some degree or other. Tends to be those that "perceive" themselves to be alpha males that seem take it worst.

Worth noting that some women can be just as bad...

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By *auraLucyLuLuWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"My block list is longer than my friends list and hotlist combined!!

(

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's just so unusual for men and women to do this. You won't fuck me so I'm going to call you a stuck up slut and then what? You'll definitely agree to meet me now? It's constant though. This barrage of insults. It is definitely making me reconsider quite a few things.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We men all have egos to some degree or other. Tends to be those that "perceive" themselves to be alpha males that seem take it worst.

Worth noting that some women can be just as bad..."

I refuse to believe woman can be like this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's just so unusual for men and women to do this. You won't fuck me so I'm going to call you a stuck up slut and then what? You'll definitely agree to meet me now? It's constant though. This barrage of insults. It is definitely making me reconsider quite a few things."

Hmm about 6 years later and that block list grow's on an hourly basis!! Don't let them get to you. Use the block button. That's what it's there for!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its the male ego. They see themselves as weak for not being able to score on what they see is a casual fuck or sex site. Many don't realise the difference between swinging and casual sex. Thankfully most guys get this or their ego isn't as fragile as the person that mailed you.

King

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We men all have egos to some degree or other. Tends to be those that "perceive" themselves to be alpha males that seem take it worst.

Worth noting that some women can be just as bad...

I refuse to believe woman can be like this

Oh they can be or a lot worse then what the OP experienced. Small few thankfully.

King

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've always found the bigger the mouth, the smaller the cock...

Can I add height to this as well? for a full on Napoleon complex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stupid carry on that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We men all have egos to some degree or other. Tends to be those that "perceive" themselves to be alpha males that seem take it worst.

Worth noting that some women can be just as bad...

I refuse to believe woman can be like this

Thankfully the good ones well outnumber the bad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We men all have egos to some degree or other. Tends to be those that "perceive" themselves to be alpha males that seem take it worst.

Worth noting that some women can be just as bad...

I refuse to believe woman can be like this

Oh they can be or a lot worse then what the OP experienced. Small few thankfully.

King"

Thank christ its only the small few that behave like this, keyboard warriors for sure

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

All the men I've met from fab have had something on their profile that I've found interesting and intriguing. I find the one liner profile men seem to get so frustrated and aggressive when I say that I like to see men write about themselves. One of my favourite lines was "well I'm not going to write you a fucking novel to get at your cunt". And I would have settled for 6 or 7 sentences.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"All the men I've met from fab have had something on their profile that I've found interesting and intriguing. I find the one liner profile men seem to get so frustrated and aggressive when I say that I like to see men write about themselves. One of my favourite lines was "well I'm not going to write you a fucking novel to get at your cunt". And I would have settled for 6 or 7 sentences. "

Someone actually typed that....Jesus wept

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The last line made me laugh but some men have no respect on here...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We men all have egos to some degree or other. Tends to be those that "perceive" themselves to be alpha males that seem take it worst.

Worth noting that some women can be just as bad...

I refuse to believe woman can be like this

Thankfully the good ones well outnumber the bad

Thankfully we do

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I should have kept a little book of my favourite insults, I did laugh with the novel line. Do you have a funny insult you've received?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I should have kept a little book of my favourite insults, I did laugh with the novel line. Do you have a funny insult you've received?"

Got a sorry your are too good looking for me

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've said something similar to that too. Some men are intimidatingly good looking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didnt reply to a guys message and he went " so what do you mean by curvy? Another word for your fat"

Cheeky bastard lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I get that a lot too. "You're just another fat slag" I like being curvy! I don't think I'm fat and I know I'm not slim. I'm the half way point but with a little belly that I've grown to love.

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By *auraLucyLuLuWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"I didnt reply to a guys message and he went " so what do you mean by curvy? Another word for your fat"

Cheeky bastard lol "

Hahaha I've had that too a couple of times and cracks me up each time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get that a lot too. "You're just another fat slag" I like being curvy! I don't think I'm fat and I know I'm not slim. I'm the half way point but with a little belly that I've grown to love."

I like my curves too.

I could maybe do with less of them but im me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didnt reply to a guys message and he went " so what do you mean by curvy? Another word for your fat"

Cheeky bastard lol

Hahaha I've had that too a couple of times and cracks me up each time

Wonder is the same group of idiots who haven't got a brain to come up with something other than " are you fat" lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well i for one love being called a slut. Lol

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By *unsterStagMan
over a year ago

Limerick

A woman without curves is like jeans without pockets.....you never know where to put your hands

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A woman without curves is like jeans without pockets.....you never know where to put your hands

Very smooth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, men, couples and women can react very badly to being turned down here. Some men react with rude messaging ,ladies by bad-mouthing men and couples in all sorts of ways...

I had a couple that was sending me multiple messages demanding I justify why I wouldn't fuck the female part of the couple. Utterly rude to demand such explanation. Had to hit the block button where they found themselves on a blocked list among similar folks. It will happen here from time to time, as some men expect women to shag all the time since they are on sex site. Some couples treat men like walking dildos they can choose from and are shocked when a man is not here only for their pleasure. The joys of fab, right?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm genuinely surprised at how badly so many people behave on this site.

Why not just be nice?

I don't get it.

What's that saying you'll catch more flies with honey? What's that about? Who the hell wants flies?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel for the ladies on this site! I wouldn't speak to a woman on the street or a pub like this if they didn't show me interest! Everyone can't be compatible it's life! Some people forget this isn't a brothel but a social site be it a little more out there! It's a downside to fab and the good guys on this site suffer because of it as well as the good ladies too! Shame really

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This said I havent experienced anything negative myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha if they only new just how delightfully hot you are in person!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Haha if they only new just how delightfully hot you are in person! "

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Me? I'm average, everything average

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah not buying that!

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

"Yes, men, couples and women can react very badly to being turned down here. Some men react with rude messaging ,ladies by bad-mouthing men and couples in all sorts of ways...

A walking dildo...interesting....where could I get one?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hahah I'm sure if you look hard enough you'll find one Ms hunter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doesn't matter how you say no to a fragile ego and there's plenty of those about. Be polite always and how they take it is not your problem...it's theirs

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By *j47Man
over a year ago

limerick

"I've always found the bigger the mouth, the smaller the cock...

I am saying nothing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Doesn't matter how you say no to a fragile ego and there's plenty of those about. Be polite always

Well said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A walking dildo...interesting....where could I get one?

If you look well, apparently they can be found on fab

haha

Same as walking flash lights

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Youre spot in there!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always thought it'd be awful being a female on this site, between this shite for even taking the time to reply and the amount of messages/dick pics! Feck that!

Now back to the popcorn, this tread is class

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

A recent favourite response went somewhat like this; "you're just a trouble maker,drama queen, man hater !! i wondered how a good looking girl like you could be single, but that question has been answerd now"

This because I don't want to meet him even though he wants to lick my asshole and pound my pussy. How could I resist?

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By *j47Man
over a year ago

limerick

"I've said something similar to that too. Some men are intimidatingly good looking."

The thing about those u think are out of ur league is they possible think the same of u

I know my experience here has being like that afraid to mail a profile because they are intimidatingly good looking till I have met them and find they really are nice human beings with similar interests and craving as my self

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Calling all other heartless slags:

I love getting messages that are something like this;

LOL, the likes of you make me sick, you call yourself warm? LOl, you haven't any ounce of loyalty and youre selfish too! The cockiness go have the moral compas of a frog !!! Im lovely ??? And you got that from your crystal ball aswell yeah? Get away and bitch with the other whores on this again will you. Youre a fucking sad bunch of empty heartless slags,end of !! bye

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Calling all other heartless slags:

I love getting messages that are something like this;

And were you kind to him?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get the ur nothing but a cock tease a odd time

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By *owdyboy 890Man
over a year ago

Country West

"Calling all other heartless slags:

I love getting messages that are something like this;

I couldn't imagine him saying that if you met him face to face but it's easy if he's a troll on a keyboard xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Blocked and moved on

Feckers wont get teased by bad manners

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Now the messages are things like " you're very graphic in your verifications on men youve fucked !!! why are you so graphic? are you a nympho ??"

I'm an adult who enjoys sex with people who have so much more to give than sex. And i want to be part of wonderful meets where we can laugh and talk and drink cups of tea and touch each other without the expectations of a relationship or the 1950s madmen mentality on women. Is it easy to fuck me? Fuck yeah it is, just connect with me on any level beyond sex and talk to me like an adult. I've been sitting by the pool all day and am eyeing up a lovely looking continental boy who is reading Papillon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel ya!!!

I had a single fem acc on here and in beginning i was told i was a man with fake acc,well last time i checked im defo not a man,,,,,hassle from idiots youll always get,,,i was lucky and got a fabulous sexy cpl that traveled 4hrs for me and took the chance.,,xxeve

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

That's brilliant! I too, have been super lucky on this site. I know I'm slightly off tilt today and normally wouldn't engage with this, but I'm in a very curious mood

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" How do you all deal with this?"

Just write back and say "you need to work on your self-esteem you sad cunt."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I ignore bad attitude. Can't control how others behave and therefore doesn't bother me tbh. Plenty of civil folk on here to make up for the losers

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By *oxic1998Woman
over a year ago

Belfast

"I ignore bad attitude. Can't control how others behave and therefore doesn't bother me tbh. Plenty of civil folk on here to make up for the losers

Doesnt bother me either. Just makes me think i made the right choice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I ignore bad attitude. Can't control how others behave and therefore doesn't bother me tbh. Plenty of civil folk on here to make up for the losers

"
well said Wee red

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By *isdirtygirlWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

I remember posting a status on my profile that i wasnt meeting.( personal reasons)

It must have attracted the ultimate troll as he hurled abuse at me, called me a Cee You Next Tuesday and told me to get the fuck off the site!!

I didnt get the chance to block him cos he was unlos within a minute of sending the message .

Theres times when this site is like a bag of Bertie Bassetts...it takes allsorts.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There does seem to be quite a few very angry people online. Today I was insulted too many times to count. My favourite being " if you think they respect the town bike, you're touched in the head". I'd never even mentioned respect or bikes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is an internet phenomenon (do do dododo).

Some people seem to develop nasty personalities because they are not actually chatting to you on the phone or face to face. They are completely cut off (and anonymous) so they feel they can act anyway they want or say anything they want. If you were chatting to them face to face it would be a different story. Cowards they are basically.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It is an internet phenomenon (do do dododo).

I couldn't agree more Seen vicious carry on by some on here and elsewhere. If you met them in real life they wouldn't be half as brave as they are online. Actually wrote a writing on it elsewhere which came to the conclusion that majority of people doing it as in essence trolls.

King

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

dreadful behaviour from a small amount of muppets on here . This is the exact reason a lot of people just block everyone from messaging them and then they choose who they interact with themselves . I know thats not perfect and bound to cause disappointment to many , but hey ho thats the easiest way to avoid such problems here .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"dreadful behaviour from a small amount of muppets on here . This is the exact reason a lot of people just block everyone from messaging them and then they choose who they interact with themselves . I know thats not perfect and bound to cause disappointment to many , but hey ho thats the easiest way to avoid such problems here ."

It also creates a bad impression of the site.

Alienates people

Encourages negative feelings towards alternative life styles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women ignoring and blocking these confused souls causes this frustration.

Picture a perhaps extreme example of the lonely soul who comes here in desperation and after rejection kills himself.

Perhaps a little of less arrogance and a little more empathy would help solve the frustration expressed on these forums.

A polite "I'm sorry you're not for me", and fair enough if a negative response then block.

Ask yourselves where this expressed frustration comes from?

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By *unnitoesWoman
over a year ago

Belfast

"I've always found the bigger the mouth, the smaller the cock...

Can I add height to this as well? for a full on Napoleon complex."

Not tonight Josephine ...( spoken in Napoleon's french accent)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women ignoring and blocking these confused souls causes this frustration.

Picture a perhaps extreme example of the lonely soul who comes here in desperation and after rejection kills himself.

Perhaps a little of less arrogance and a little more empathy would help solve the frustration expressed on these forums.

A polite "I'm sorry you're not for me", and fair enough if a negative response then block.

Ask yourselves where this expressed frustration comes from?

last recipient of a "no thanks " followed on with a " your too fat ugly and a slapper slut anyway ". I can easily see why guys end up blocked or even unable to mail in the first place due to messages like the one i just described there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women ignoring and blocking these confused souls causes this frustration.

Picture a perhaps extreme example of the lonely soul who comes here in desperation and after rejection kills himself.

Perhaps a little of less arrogance and a little more empathy would help solve the frustration expressed on these forums.

A polite "I'm sorry you're not for me", and fair enough if a negative response then block.

Ask yourselves where this expressed frustration comes from?

So why blame all the other for one idiots rant?

The problem here is members of fab don't show their faces because they are ashamed? of their life choices.

Rather than making an effort to promote even in a small way this choice, instead there is a negative response resulting in a negative reaction

Small steps start with a friendly outlook

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

I fully agree with a lot of the above. People being abusive directly, or even indirectly, to another is not on.

If you have taken the time to politely say No Thanks and get an abusive response, I feel that you have a duty to do two things. Block them and then report the abuse to Admin. Otherwise other folk here are likely to get the same treatment and that's something I'm sure we all would like to avoid.

Of course there's a selfish reason to this as well. Anything that helps to redress the balance of the sexes on here is a good thing, as far as I'm concerned

Sorry though for anyone that receives abusive messages and let me reassure you that most men are not like that.

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By *isdirtygirlWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

Women ignoring and blocking these confused souls causes this frustration.

Picture a perhaps extreme example of the lonely soul who comes here in desperation and after rejection kills himself.

Perhaps a little of less arrogance and a little more empathy would help solve the frustration expressed on these forums.

A polite "I'm sorry you're not for me", and fair enough if a negative response then block.

Ask yourselves where this expressed frustration comes from?

So why blame all the other for one idiots rant?

The problem here is members of fab don't show their faces because they are ashamed? of their life choices.

Rather than making an effort to promote even in a small way this choice, instead there is a negative response resulting in a negative reaction

Small steps start with a friendly outlook"

Thats the thing. We dont blame all men for one message. What i will say is, it paints men in a poor light when they cannot accept no thanks. A lot of women prefer to hunt rather than be sought, purely for this reason as it saves on the abuse and hateful messages

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

Just to add, this is a two way street.

I have had to block more than one lady for being abusive here. Rare and in single digits but it does happen. Something to bare in mind.

Slap yourself hard if you got excited at the word bare

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

exactly what missdirtygirl said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As I've said earlier I haven't experienced any of this negativity.

I only see what I have read here

Therefore I consider myself special. Lol

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

Aren't we all special? In our own little ways but that keeps me going, as well as searching

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