FabSwingers.com forum: Married...wife doesn't know

By *unnyfook OP Man
over a year ago

Naas

So this is where I put my heart on my sleive...I am married wife doesn't know I'm here.

I'm bi some people can't accept that.

If wife found out it would destroy my life and hers .

I'm not looking for sympathy nor do I care what the haters will say.... being on this site has saved my life ..I suffer from depression and being here I have met great guys and great women .

Thank you fabswingers and the people I have met .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why did you feel the need to explain your personal life ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Keep on keep buddy

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By *rownForFunMan
over a year ago

Near Toulouse

"Why did you feel the need to explain your personal life ?"

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By *irtypair00Couple
over a year ago

Dublin

"Why did you feel the need to explain your personal life ?"

Attention seeking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well have to say well done for the honesty what you wrote showed a lot of courage if anyone here had a problem with your situation well they have the problem not you but try find a way to inform your wife about this she might even know and is waiting for you to say it true love will get over any issue we have only become closer by chatting and being completely honest with each other if you are bi well you can't change that it's how you feel 95 percent the the female part of couples h are bi as well so hold your head high and out of respect to your wife try find away to tell her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Funny the 2 couples that have negative remarks about your situation the both females are bisexual or are told they people in glass House shouldn't throw stones

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By *armel and FrancisCouple
over a year ago

North wex

"Well have to say well done for the honesty what you wrote showed a lot of courage if anyone here had a problem with your situation well they have the problem not you but try find a way to inform your wife about this she might even know and is waiting for you to say it true love will get over any issue we have only become closer by chatting and being completely honest with each other if you are bi well you can't change that it's how you feel 95 percent the the female part of couples h are bi as well so hold your head high and out of respect to your wife try find away to tell her"

Well said

...and to OP while we don't condone your actions we do admire your candidness. It's never easy to deal with the scourge of depression just make sure you are getting help for it. Like the above couple we have become closer on so many levels and have fallen in love all over again with each other. I would ask however why you felt the need to post here, publicly, now. Has something happened recently that caused you annoyance or discomfort? If that's within your control you can work out a way to deal with it.... If not well hopefully u have the strength to deal with things you can't change. Fran...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being honest nowadays is very rare.

I salute you for being honest. I for one do not get involved with married or attached men.

At the same time don't think you should have posted for the whole fab world to know your business, as you will get alot of backlash from judgemental people.

I wish you good luck. Keep your head high. Deal with your emotional issues.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fair play to you OP.It takes a lot of balls to admit you are suffering from depression.Whilst a lot of others will give you stick for the fact you are on here behind your wifes back, I think you have made the right choice in admitting whats going on. Dont worry what others think of you.

However you do have to take a step back and consider the consequences of your actions. What happens if your wife ever found out.Would she stand by you? highly doubtful dont you think??. And how would you cope with your depression if she left you?

You really need to seek medical help sooner than later . Stay positive and dont sweep the problem under the carpet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You didn't ask for advice, but the only good thing I can say to you is go to your Gp and get professional help for your mental health issues.

Good luck.

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By *rs.CJWoman
over a year ago

Limerick

I can confirm that shes not the only wife in the dark. I see people commending the OP for his honesty .In my books being honest with a whole pile of strangers on here while remaining totally dishonest, deceiving ,lying and breaking the trust of the people that really matter in your life shows some pretty mixed up thinking .Then I suppose we all have different values.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Funny the 2 couples that have negative remarks about your situation the both females are bisexual or are told they people in glass House shouldn't throw stones"

Who was negative ? If you are referring to us we asked a question we didn't give a negative opinion maybe you misconstrued what we asked

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By *auraLucyLuLuWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"I can confirm that shes not the only wife in the dark. I see people commending the OP for his honesty .In my books being honest with a whole pile of strangers on here while remaining totally dishonest, deceiving ,lying and breaking the trust of the people that really matter in your life shows some pretty mixed up thinking .Then I suppose we all have different values."

Says the long suffering wife!

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By *j47Man
over a year ago

limerick

Is that u dear

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So this is where I put my heart on my sleive...I am married wife doesn't know I'm here.

I'm bi some people can't accept that.

If wife found out it would destroy my life and hers .

I'm not looking for sympathy nor do I care what the haters will say.... being on this site has saved my life ..I suffer from depression and being here I have met great guys and great women .

Thank you fabswingers and the people I have met ."

Lie in the arms of someone you love ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is that u dear

Thats what I was wondering

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By *j47Man
over a year ago

limerick

Is that u dear

Thats what I was wondering

No we don't have a lamp like that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is that u dear

Thats what I was wondering

No we don't have a lamp like that

Have you double checked?

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By *j47Man
over a year ago

limerick

Is that u dear

Thats what I was wondering

No we don't have a lamp like that

Have you double checked?"

Just running round now checking all the rooms

Nope nothing like it in the sitting room

Or the hall

Nothing in the parlour

Or the kitchen

I shall try the pool house in a bit

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By *elfastDMan
over a year ago

belfast

Is that u dear

Thats what I was wondering

No we don't have a lamp like that

Have you double checked?

Just running round now checking all the rooms

Nope nothing like it in the sitting room

Or the hall

Nothing in the parlour

Or the kitchen

I shall try the pool house in a bit

Forget about the lamp CJ, is the wife walking around in that mask?

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By *j47Man
over a year ago

limerick

Is that u dear

Thats what I was wondering

No we don't have a lamp like that

Have you double checked?

Just running round now checking all the rooms

Nope nothing like it in the sitting room

Or the hall

Nothing in the parlour

Or the kitchen

I shall try the pool house in a bit

Forget about the lamp CJ, is the wife walking around in that mask?

Ffs D if she was I'd be chasing her

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By *unnitoesWoman
over a year ago

Belfast

Secrets in a relationship are awful! I was in a relationship with a man for quite some time, he knew I was bisexual. However, 2 years into our relationship a friend of mine who was on Fab ( I wasn't then) mailed me recognising my wallpaper in a pic on a profile

turns out my bf was bi and had 4 veri's from men on his profile

I wish he'd have told me....

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By *igBlondeDommeWoman
over a year ago

middle of nowhere

"So this is where I put my heart on my sleive...I am married wife doesn't know I'm here.

I'm bi some people can't accept that.

If wife found out it would destroy my life and hers .

I'm not looking for sympathy nor do I care what the haters will say.... being on this site has saved my life ..I suffer from depression and being here I have met great guys and great women .

Thank you fabswingers and the people I have met .

Lie in the arms of someone you love ..."

Ohhh deep.

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By *igBlondeDommeWoman
over a year ago

middle of nowhere

I don't play with married or attached guys but each to their own. Nobody knows what goes on in anyone else's life so live and let live. If the op has gotten some bit of positivity from this well that's good.. we're all looking for something different. That's what's good about fab a lot of open minded people. Or I'd like to think so.

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By *igBlondeDommeWoman
over a year ago

middle of nowhere

Is that u dear

Too funny

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By *aid backMan
over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

Have you ever thought that living a lie might be compounding your mental health issues?? It surely can't help that's for sure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So this is where I put my heart on my sleive...I am married wife doesn't know I'm here.

I'm bi some people can't accept that.

If wife found out it would destroy my life and hers .

I'm not looking for sympathy nor do I care what the haters will say.... being on this site has saved my life ..I suffer from depression and being here I have met great guys and great women .

Thank you fabswingers and the people I have met ."

So, you suffer from depression and it's a terrible illness for you and for those close to you , especially your wife. Bet she has supported you , comforted you when you were at your lowest. And you would trade her happiness for meaningless sex with strangers.

You obviously have never had your heart truly broken ... yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey OP, I'll give you my penny's worth. Some people will not be happy that you are married and on here too. That's their choice to feel like that. You feel that Fab is an outlet for you and most probably it is. If it works for you, keep it up. Your wife will most definitely be upset if she found out but at the same time, Fab could be keeping both of you together, especially if you have kids. I remember a good friend of mine telling me that he was pissed off and he went to the doctor. Within five minutes, the doctor put him on anti depressants for six months. Come back and see me if things get worse. I watched him become a zombie and the tablets did nothing for him. Actually made him worse in my opinion. Some days he became a complete pain in the hole and I wanted to punch his lights out but it wasn't him. It was what he had become with the tablets. We spoke and I asked him to stop taking them and see if we could sort this crap out. Eventually we did. He's in a great place now. I'm not a doctor or anything else but I believe that everyone is different and has different needs. You've sort of found an outlet in Fab and if it helps you, long may it continue.

I'll leave you with two pieces of advice.

Firstly, from a young age, men and programmed to be men, not cry, don't show your feelings. It's okay to cry if you want and don't be afraid to hold it in. Sometimes a good cry releases it.

Secondly, if you've got a problem and it's on top of you and you see no way out and you think by doing something stupid is the quick way out. Well let me tell you, it's not. It leaves many unanswered questions. Have a nights sleep, you might not get a whole lot of sleep but when you wake up in the morning, your problems will still be there, however, they will seem different and you will view them in a different light.

Be good OP, be safe and remember, there's a whole lot of people that love you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mental health is a serious problem in Ireland the sweep it under the carpet attitude needs to be banished god forbid talk about a serious issues here how Leinster is going to do in the actually what ever the fuck there contesting in the man brought up serious issues here but there is more pressing things going on in the w like does Amy watch btsin take it up the jackse Leinster Leinster Leinster

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mental health is a serious problem in Ireland the sweep it under the carpet attitude needs to be banished god forbid talk about a serious issues here how Leinster is going to do in the actually what ever the fuck there contesting in the man brought up serious issues here but there is more pressing things going on in the w like does Amy watch btsin take it up the jackse Leinster Leinster Leinster"

What?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So this is where I put my heart on my sleive...I am married wife doesn't know I'm here.

I'm bi some people can't accept that.

If wife found out it would destroy my life and hers .

I'm not looking for sympathy nor do I care what the haters will say.... being on this site has saved my life ..I suffer from depression and being here I have met great guys and great women .

Thank you fabswingers and the people I have met ."

You'll get judged by this. Personally I have no time for married folks being here without their partners knowledge but that's because of personal reasons that I won't go into here. Also married people who are playing behind their other halves backs wouldn't be getting invites to our parties if we know they are doing this. A extremely negative post I admit on my part but I will commend you on being open and admitting what you have. It's something a lot of people would not do.

King

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By *irtypair00Couple
over a year ago

Dublin

"Funny the 2 couples that have negative remarks about your situation the both females are bisexual or are told they people in glass House shouldn't throw stones"

I dont see your point here ? I have no issues with someone's sexuality , its the cheating behind his wife's back i dont agree with .

Mr Dirty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Point is the man has a right to express hes feelings here it took alot courage

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By *irtypair00Couple
over a year ago

Dublin

"Point is the man has a right to express hes feelings here it took alot courage"

Yes we all have the right to express feelings here

. Just not sure about the courage quote from behind a keyboard, the real courage would be to talk to his wife . Either way i wish him the best hope he is as honest as he says and talks to his wife

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Firstly the only one who has to deal with your infidelity is you and potentially your wife. It is not for people on here to judge your actions. You have a choice in how you live. If you are suffering from depression I would highly recommend seeing someone professionally . If you are good at talking it could do you the world of good. You may find there is a lot going in your subconscious why you indulge in the behaviour that you do. It is about gaining an understanding of yourself and your behaviour. No judgement from me on what you are doing , I just hope for your own sake you get the help that allows you to help yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree whole heartily there it's a no win situation actually hope it is not might be surprised if he tells he's wife and she already knows a woman's intuition is underestimated she might be relived it's out in the open but we direct this to the author of the forum if you love your wife if you truly love her well tell her that is the decent thing to do we all have are opinions on the situation but the most important person right now is your wife were we feel sympathy for your situation it's pales into insufficient to the sympathy we have for your wife life is about taking steps your first step was expressing your feelings here take the next step and show your wife the respect she desires

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have you ever thought that living a lie might be compounding your mental health issues?? It surely can't help that's for sure"

We're no experts but what he said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lifes too short. Do what makes you happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Point is the man has a right to express hes feelings here it took alot courage"

Courageous! What planet are you on ?

His wife is the courageous one. Having to deal with a self centred, cheating waste of space

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By *etmebeurfantasyWoman
over a year ago

My town

"Point is the man has a right to express hes feelings here it took alot courage

Courageous! What planet are you on ?

His wife is the courageous one. Having to deal with a self centred, cheating waste of space

"
harsh calling him a waste of space, ok he's on here without his wife's permission or knowledge but has admitted he has depression....that to me takes alot to admit....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If he is a waste of space what does that make 90 percent of the allegedly single men here at least he admits he is sneaking around # just saying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/05/17 19:09:46]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Point is the man has a right to express hes feelings here it took alot courage

Courageous! What planet are you on ?

His wife is the courageous one. Having to deal with a self centred, cheating waste of space

Would you be saying the same (or anything) if the OP was a married woman?

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By *ord Willy McFuck-BucketMan
over a year ago

newcastle

Isn't the internet great

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are we all still bashing the OP?

How lovely.

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By *oxic1998Woman
over a year ago

Belfast

"Are we all still bashing the OP?

How lovely.

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By *imon 2kMan
over a year ago

city

The op hasn't been on since he posted 18 hours ago, hope he hasn't come to any harm.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *isdirtygirlWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"Point is the man has a right to express hes feelings here it took alot courage

Courageous! What planet are you on ?

His wife is the courageous one. Having to deal with a self centred, cheating waste of space

Id love to know what planet youre on thinking its ok to call anybody a waste of space

. You might disapprove of his behaviour but being tactful in this instance might be a better option. Calling anybody a waste of space, could be enough to tip someone over the edge,especially when suffering with depression. You might be more mindful of that next time you post a comment.

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By *auraLucyLuLuWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"Point is the man has a right to express hes feelings here it took alot courage

Courageous! What planet are you on ?

His wife is the courageous one. Having to deal with a self centred, cheating waste of space

Id love to know what planet youre on thinking its ok to call anybody a waste of space

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Point is the man has a right to express hes feelings here it took alot courage

Courageous! What planet are you on ?

His wife is the courageous one. Having to deal with a self centred, cheating waste of space

Id love to know what planet youre on thinking its ok to call anybody a waste of space

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By *unnyfook OP Man
over a year ago

Naas

"Why did you feel the need to explain your personal life ?"

It was a drink rant....and mostly in a way I'm being honest with people here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why did you feel the need to explain your personal life ?

It was a drink rant....and mostly in a way I'm being honest with people here"

I understand d*unk rants.

You may be better off putting the being married info on your profile tho - not everyone on fab uses the forums

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didn't realise having depression gave you free reign to behave like a cunt and not get called on it.

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By *etmebeurfantasyWoman
over a year ago

My town

"I didn't realise having depression gave you free reign to behave like a cunt and not get called on it. "

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By *isdirtygirlWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"I didn't realise having depression gave you free reign to behave like a cunt and not get called on it. "

Another lovely post! What lovely gentlemen you are!

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By *j47Man
over a year ago

limerick

My believe in humanity remains

Lest u walk a mile in another's shoes don't judge them for what they do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't realise having depression gave you free reign to behave like a cunt and not get called on it. "

Is this a d*unken rant too?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yano what buddy if your enjoying yourself continue on. As long as there is no kids envolved if your wife does find it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't realise having depression gave you free reign to behave like a cunt and not get called on it.

Is this a d*unken rant too?"

Nope, just an honest assessment of the situation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't realise having depression gave you free reign to behave like a cunt and not get called on it.

Is this a d*unken rant too?

Nope, just an honest assessment of the situation. "

Shame

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To the people judging the man it must be great to be perfect it must be great to be so perfect that you can judge the man for been honest wonder why did yous bother even joining a sex site you're are so perfect surely a sex site is of no use probably the only married man here that has admitted that he is doing his wife wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Point is the man has a right to express hes feelings here it took alot courage

Courageous! What planet are you on ?

His wife is the courageous one. Having to deal with a self centred, cheating waste of space

Id love to know what planet youre on thinking its ok to call anybody a waste of space

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why did you feel the need to explain your personal life ?

It was a drink rant....and mostly in a way I'm being honest with people here"

Thought maybe you were d*unk ..oh you were certainly honest but as u see it brings out the judges in people ...as I say none ones business but your own but maybe take time away from site sit down and chat with your wife and get help for your depression sometimes your own grass is very green but you just can not see it ...best of luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Suggestion...stop drinking alcohol it is a depressant.

It's your life to live how you want to live it and only you have to answer for your actions

But if your wife ever found out can you even begin to understand how devastated she would be...

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By *igerclawsCouple
over a year ago

cork

"Point is the man has a right to express hes feelings here it took alot courage

Courageous! What planet are you on ?

His wife is the courageous one. Having to deal with a self centred, cheating waste of space

Id love to know what planet youre on thinking its ok to call anybody a waste of space

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By *igBlondeDommeWoman
over a year ago

middle of nowhere

"To the people judging the man it must be great to be perfect it must be great to be so perfect that you can judge the man for been honest wonder why did yous bother even joining a sex site you're are so perfect surely a sex site is of no use probably the only married man here that has admitted that he is doing his wife wrong"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nobody knows what goes on in a relationship where one person finds themselves here...

To the people who like to judge married people I say walk a day in their shoes...

I know lots of married people playing away and they are completely devoted and in very loving relationships with their partners, this site is about sex and no strings no love there can be more emotion in being involved in a Facebook message relationship than having sex on a site as this...

The advice of telling your partner what a load of crap my advice would be go talk to somebody regarding your depression a counsellor tell them about here and how your feeling they will guide you on your best route to recovery...

It's amazing how so many people usually say oh their profiles their choices yet when somebody comes out and pours their heart out about being unhappy your so quick to judge..

Talk to somebody op your gp for a start and ask them to guide you to a suitable councillor x

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By *igBlondeDommeWoman
over a year ago

middle of nowhere

"Are we all still bashing the OP?

How lovely.

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By *igBlondeDommeWoman
over a year ago

middle of nowhere

"My believe in humanity remains

Lest u walk a mile in another's shoes don't judge them for what they do "

Exactly this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone who has experience of a family member with chronic depression will be aware of the impact it has on the entire family unit ,especially the spouse. To make a thread claiming that Fab has saved his life is pathetic.

My comment about being " a waste of space" may tip him over the edge .. oh please catch a grip The guy is managing a double level life with relative ease.

Now to all the Alpha males that are giving me their wisdom in emails. A true Alpha male is tucked in firmly behind his lioness and cubs

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By *isdirtygirlWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"Anyone who has experience of a family member with chronic depression will be aware of the impact it has on the entire family unit ,especially the spouse. To make a thread claiming that Fab has saved his life is pathetic.

My comment about being " a waste of space" may tip him over the edge .. oh please catch a grip The guy is managing a double level life with relative ease.

Now to all the Alpha males that are giving me their wisdom in emails. A true Alpha male is tucked in firmly behind his lioness and cubs

Wind your neck in there dear..i said comments like yours could tip somebody over the edge..it wasnt aimed at the Op in particular.

Seems threads like these strike a nerve with you cos ive seen you before commenting about heartbreak and being hurt.

Maybe you need to clean your own shop before judging anyone elses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I read the topic I thought your wife didn't know ye were married

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By *igerclawsCouple
over a year ago

cork

My comment about being " a waste of space" may tip him over the edge .. oh please catch a grip The guy is managing a double level life with relative ease.

Now to all the Alpha males that are giving me their wisdom in emails. A true Alpha male is tucked in firmly behind his lioness and cubs

Our questions to you would be have you a family member with chronic depression which would give you some insight to have such opinion on this matter??

And secondly you should google alpha males before you give a substandard description of what an alpha male is??

Just curious on our behalf we shall await with bated breath for your answer

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By *unnyfook OP Man
over a year ago

Naas

I have been to a councillor and gp...on the happy pills...

I honestly did not think this post would get alot of feedback.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hope the medication works honestly but only part of the issue you brought up next step is dealing with honesty with your wife you brought both issues up and you got some very honest replies some we agreed with some we didn't but honest opinions they were best of luck dealing with the second issue might find telling the wife might help with the first one end of the day Ur choice if you tell her or best of luck anyway

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