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"You should chill They are having a hard time, last thing they need is a nosey neighbour Let them work it " Eh I think her point is that she can't chill | |||
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"Put yourself in their shoes? The 2am thing was back in November... 3 months ago Live and let live Tolerance " To quote.. "My neighbours, young couple, both teachers, they fight all the time" | |||
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"Reluctantly I am posting here. I've asked friends family, council, and the guards. My neighbours, young couple, both teachers, they fight all the time. " I fucking hate you pig" fights. Started about 2 weeks after moving in last year. He's tall dark and she's average height very curvy. Always pleasant. Walls are thick, they had a party, didn't hear a thing. When you come home after a long day and they keep you awake with screaming and slamming doors, well I've reached my limits. Sometime in November they had a huge fight, woke me up at 2am with screaming and crying. Couldn't sleep till 5am and Sunday I was wrecked. Wrote them a letter asking them to politely sort it out. This is my house. They rent. Should I go to their landlord? " ..so there's been no problems since November? . Maybe they have taken your advice | |||
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"You meet some red hot lover and throwing caution to the wind you scream the house down fucking all night long. The neighbour complains to your landlord... How do you perceive them? " Not relevant and out of context! | |||
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"You meet some red hot lover and throwing caution to the wind you scream the house down fucking all night long. The neighbour complains to your landlord... How do you perceive them? " Its not a once off. That would be different. Its been going on since november and shes asked them to be considerate and not scream and shout at 2am. | |||
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"Reluctantly I am posting here. I've asked friends family, council, and the guards. My neighbours, young couple, both teachers, they fight all the time. " I fucking hate you pig" fights. Started about 2 weeks after moving in last year. He's tall dark and she's average height very curvy. Always pleasant. Walls are thick, they had a party, didn't hear a thing. When you come home after a long day and they keep you awake with screaming and slamming doors, well I've reached my limits. Sometime in November they had a huge fight, woke me up at 2am with screaming and crying. Couldn't sleep till 5am and Sunday I was wrecked. Wrote them a letter asking them to politely sort it out. This is my house. They rent. Should I go to their landlord? ..so there's been no problems since November? . Maybe they have taken your advice " Top of page OP says . they fight all the time | |||
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"It's the very same thing just framed differently! " It's only the same if it's all the time! If that was the case .? Yep it's excessive! | |||
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"Reluctantly I am posting here. I've asked friends family, council, and the guards. My neighbours, young couple, both teachers, they fight all the time. " I fucking hate you pig" fights. Started about 2 weeks after moving in last year. He's tall dark and she's average height very curvy. Always pleasant. Walls are thick, they had a party, didn't hear a thing. When you come home after a long day and they keep you awake with screaming and slamming doors, well I've reached my limits. Sometime in November they had a huge fight, woke me up at 2am with screaming and crying. Couldn't sleep till 5am and Sunday I was wrecked. Wrote them a letter asking them to politely sort it out. This is my house. They rent. Should I go to their landlord? ..so there's been no problems since November? . Maybe they have taken your advice Top of page OP says . they fight all the time" ...that query was directed at the op. | |||
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"Reluctantly I am posting here. I've asked friends family, council, and the guards. My neighbours, young couple, both teachers, they fight all the time. " I fucking hate you pig" fights. Started about 2 weeks after moving in last year. He's tall dark and she's average height very curvy. Always pleasant. Walls are thick, they had a party, didn't hear a thing. When you come home after a long day and they keep you awake with screaming and slamming doors, well I've reached my limits. Sometime in November they had a huge fight, woke me up at 2am with screaming and crying. Couldn't sleep till 5am and Sunday I was wrecked. Wrote them a letter asking them to politely sort it out. This is my house. They rent. Should I go to their landlord? ..so there's been no problems since November? . Maybe they have taken your advice Top of page OP says . they fight all the time...that query was directed at the op. " Fair enough But the point stands. OP described one incident in November but also mentioned that they fight all the time. So unless I'm reading the post incorrectly they have not taken her advice | |||
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"Reluctantly I am posting here. I've asked friends family, council, and the guards. My neighbours, young couple, both teachers, they fight all the time. " I fucking hate you pig" fights. Started about 2 weeks after moving in last year. He's tall dark and she's average height very curvy. Always pleasant. Walls are thick, they had a party, didn't hear a thing. When you come home after a long day and they keep you awake with screaming and slamming doors, well I've reached my limits. Sometime in November they had a huge fight, woke me up at 2am with screaming and crying. Couldn't sleep till 5am and Sunday I was wrecked. Wrote them a letter asking them to politely sort it out. This is my house. They rent. Should I go to their landlord? ..so there's been no problems since November? . Maybe they have taken your advice Top of page OP says . they fight all the time...that query was directed at the op. Fair enough But the point stands. OP described one incident in November but also mentioned that they fight all the time. So unless I'm reading the post incorrectly they have not taken her advice " ..that's why I'm asking, Imy also unclear on the present situation | |||
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"Send your neighbour some relationship counselling leaflets from online maybe that would help them" | |||
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"I'm just intrigued as to what their physical attributes have to do with the issue." I think redunicorn is already fab damaged Op, try to speak to your neighbours, not a letter, confront the two of them together. It might not be easy but I guess the only way that could lead to some success. | |||
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"I'm just intrigued as to what their physical attributes have to do with the issue." I was thinking that myself ... Is this a fantasy story ?? | |||
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"I'm just intrigued as to what their physical attributes have to do with the issue." Me too | |||
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"I'm just intrigued as to what their physical attributes have to do with the issue." Or their jobs for that matter | |||
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"About the how he looks and how she looks. When they were out,in the club, he was the only guy. It was her and other 7 girls. And just him. " I don't get what this is supposed to have to do with anything either. Maybe wait til the girl is home alone and invite her over for a cup of tea. Sounds like she could use a friend. | |||
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"2 sides to every neighbor dispute. Hard to judge when you only get one side I think they have pissed you off ignoring the child Ref to how he looks and the only guy in a group of girls. Is not relevant " Id agree that how someone looks isnt relevant.For me, this sounds like emotional and psychological abuse being thrown back and forth between the neighbours.Now i might be jumping the gun in calling it emotional abuse, but that is in fact what it is. How much further will it go before it becomes a domestic violence issue and Op has done or said nothing about the early stages of it? A lot of people turn a blind eye to couples arguing and leave them to their own devices for being percieved as nosy. Can i ask you what would you do if you were in Op's situation? | |||
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"2 sides to every neighbor dispute. Hard to judge when you only get one side I think they have pissed you off ignoring the child Ref to how he looks and the only guy in a group of girls. Is not relevant Id agree that how someone looks isnt relevant.For me, this sounds like emotional and psychological abuse being thrown back and forth between the neighbours.Now i might be jumping the gun in calling it emotional abuse, but that is in fact what it is. How much further will it go before it becomes a domestic violence issue and Op has done or said nothing about the early stages of it? A lot of people turn a blind eye to couples arguing and leave them to their own devices for being percieved as nosy. Can i ask you what would you do if you were in Op's situation? " As I said in my post. There are 2 sides to every story , I wouldn't trivialise domestic abuse by attempting to make that judgment from the comfort of my office based on what the op has posted I think the op gave a different slant on the situation from their prospective when personal appearance and professions were highlighted | |||
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"Ignoring my kid has not pissed me off. What has pissed me off is hearing a man call a lovely looking girl a " disgusting fucking pig" over and over again. Hearing her cry. Being sick from so much crying. Makes me wonder if he is the jealous type. Or just a bully. What else he says to her which may make her insecure. Emotional abuse. That is what comes into mind. I mind my own business. But if I see someone getting abused right under my eyes I can't stand and just not to anything. She is never alone. He is always there. I've tried to approach her. " Then going to the guards won't really help the situation I'm afraid. | |||
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"Ignoring my kid has not pissed me off. What has pissed me off is hearing a man call a lovely looking girl a " disgusting fucking pig" over and over again. Hearing her cry. Being sick from so much crying. Makes me wonder if he is the jealous type. Or just a bully. What else he says to her which may make her insecure. Emotional abuse. That is what comes into mind. I mind my own business. But if I see someone getting abused right under my eyes I can't stand and just not to anything. She is never alone. He is always there. I've tried to approach her. " Youre right to show concern if its a continuous thing. Can you txt her to ask if shes ok and would she like a chat over a coffee? There has to be some way to show her that you care and know whats happening? If you do manage to talk to her, make the conversation about her and not him.Tell her youre concerned for her safety and well being. She ll make excuses for him but dont discuss the excuses. Tell her you want to talk about her and how shes feeling. Youll get a better response from her if you approach it that way. Its an awful situation youre in but if it was bothering me as much as its bothering you,id do my best to help her. I hope youre doing well in the meantime Op x | |||
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"2 sides to every neighbor dispute. Hard to judge when you only get one side I think they have pissed you off ignoring the child Ref to how he looks and the only guy in a group of girls. Is not relevant Id agree that how someone looks isnt relevant.For me, this sounds like emotional and psychological abuse being thrown back and forth between the neighbours.Now i might be jumping the gun in calling it emotional abuse, but that is in fact what it is. How much further will it go before it becomes a domestic violence issue and Op has done or said nothing about the early stages of it? A lot of people turn a blind eye to couples arguing and leave them to their own devices for being percieved as nosy. Can i ask you what would you do if you were in Op's situation? As I said in my post. There are 2 sides to every story , I wouldn't trivialise domestic abuse by attempting to make that judgment from the comfort of my office based on what the op has posted I think the op gave a different slant on the situation from their prospective when personal appearance and professions were highlighted " Isnt that the thing though? Trivialising emotional abuse or domestic violence is whats wrong? Leave out the looks and appearance comments for a moment and look at the ongoing screaming matches between the couple. You think thats right because its not happening in your " office" . Thats whats called turning a blind eye. If they were your neighbours and you were to speak to the male half of the couple and tell him you can hear him, hed not be so brazen with his mouth the next time. Theres something wrong in this country when people ignore whats going on under their noses with neighbours or family members or whatever situation someone finds themselves in. It literally drives me to despair | |||
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"2 sides to every neighbor dispute. Hard to judge when you only get one side I think they have pissed you off ignoring the child Ref to how he looks and the only guy in a group of girls. Is not relevant Id agree that how someone looks isnt relevant.For me, this sounds like emotional and psychological abuse being thrown back and forth between the neighbours.Now i might be jumping the gun in calling it emotional abuse, but that is in fact what it is. How much further will it go before it becomes a domestic violence issue and Op has done or said nothing about the early stages of it? A lot of people turn a blind eye to couples arguing and leave them to their own devices for being percieved as nosy. Can i ask you what would you do if you were in Op's situation? As I said in my post. There are 2 sides to every story , I wouldn't trivialise domestic abuse by attempting to make that judgment from the comfort of my office based on what the op has posted I think the op gave a different slant on the situation from their prospective when personal appearance and professions were highlighted Isnt that the thing though? Trivialising emotional abuse or domestic violence is whats wrong? Leave out the looks and appearance comments for a moment and look at the ongoing screaming matches between the couple. You think thats right because its not happening in your " office" . Thats whats called turning a blind eye. If they were your neighbours and you were to speak to the male half of the couple and tell him you can hear him, hed not be so brazen with his mouth the next time. Theres something wrong in this country when people ignore whats going on under their noses with neighbours or family members or whatever situation someone finds themselves in. It literally drives me to despair " I think you may have misunderstood.. Based on the OPs first post it read more like a couple that argued a lot And the joint noise was keeping her awake. The OPs last post painted a completely different set of circumstances I didn't trivialise domestic abuse , in fact I did the complete opposite by stating I wouldn't make that judgment call | |||
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"2 sides to every neighbor dispute. Hard to judge when you only get one side I think they have pissed you off ignoring the child Ref to how he looks and the only guy in a group of girls. Is not relevant Id agree that how someone looks isnt relevant.For me, this sounds like emotional and psychological abuse being thrown back and forth between the neighbours.Now i might be jumping the gun in calling it emotional abuse, but that is in fact what it is. How much further will it go before it becomes a domestic violence issue and Op has done or said nothing about the early stages of it? A lot of people turn a blind eye to couples arguing and leave them to their own devices for being percieved as nosy. Can i ask you what would you do if you were in Op's situation? As I said in my post. There are 2 sides to every story , I wouldn't trivialise domestic abuse by attempting to make that judgment from the comfort of my office based on what the op has posted I think the op gave a different slant on the situation from their prospective when personal appearance and professions were highlighted Isnt that the thing though? Trivialising emotional abuse or domestic violence is whats wrong? Leave out the looks and appearance comments for a moment and look at the ongoing screaming matches between the couple. You think thats right because its not happening in your " office" . Thats whats called turning a blind eye. If they were your neighbours and you were to speak to the male half of the couple and tell him you can hear him, hed not be so brazen with his mouth the next time. Theres something wrong in this country when people ignore whats going on under their noses with neighbours or family members or whatever situation someone finds themselves in. It literally drives me to despair " I am sorry but concern for the well-being wasn't mentioned at the start, it was about noise disturbance and while I don't condone nor would I ever trivialise domestic abuse. We have heard about one argument that kept op awake and when sending a polite letter didn't sort it out but actually strained issues between neighbours we then heard about that. Of course the noisy neighbours were not going to react well to the letter...They were not considerate of noise levels in the first place so sending a polite letter wasn't going to work. These kind of situations are awful but keep it neutral by letting the guards deal with it. If you think it's bad now after your letter...Imagine what they will be like after the landlord visits and they think you are trying to get them kicked out. From the information currently given... I think it's noise related and while not trying to diminish what is being said to that girl I think it was an argument that escalated. Is he verbally abusing her continuously? Even so I still think it's a guard issue as I personally wouldn't want to draw an abusive man to my door. Madame B | |||
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"2 sides to every neighbor dispute. Hard to judge when you only get one side I think they have pissed you off ignoring the child Ref to how he looks and the only guy in a group of girls. Is not relevant Id agree that how someone looks isnt relevant.For me, this sounds like emotional and psychological abuse being thrown back and forth between the neighbours.Now i might be jumping the gun in calling it emotional abuse, but that is in fact what it is. How much further will it go before it becomes a domestic violence issue and Op has done or said nothing about the early stages of it? A lot of people turn a blind eye to couples arguing and leave them to their own devices for being percieved as nosy. Can i ask you what would you do if you were in Op's situation? As I said in my post. There are 2 sides to every story , I wouldn't trivialise domestic abuse by attempting to make that judgment from the comfort of my office based on what the op has posted I think the op gave a different slant on the situation from their prospective when personal appearance and professions were highlighted Isnt that the thing though? Trivialising emotional abuse or domestic violence is whats wrong? Leave out the looks and appearance comments for a moment and look at the ongoing screaming matches between the couple. You think thats right because its not happening in your " office" . Thats whats called turning a blind eye. If they were your neighbours and you were to speak to the male half of the couple and tell him you can hear him, hed not be so brazen with his mouth the next time. Theres something wrong in this country when people ignore whats going on under their noses with neighbours or family members or whatever situation someone finds themselves in. It literally drives me to despair I am sorry but concern for the well-being wasn't mentioned at the start, it was about noise disturbance and while I don't condone nor would I ever trivialise domestic abuse. We have heard about one argument that kept op awake and when sending a polite letter didn't sort it out but actually strained issues between neighbours we then heard about that. Of course the noisy neighbours were not going to react well to the letter...They were not considerate of noise levels in the first place so sending a polite letter wasn't going to work. These kind of situations are awful but keep it neutral by letting the guards deal with it. If you think it's bad now after your letter...Imagine what they will be like after the landlord visits and they think you are trying to get them kicked out. From the information currently given... I think it's noise related and while not trying to diminish what is being said to that girl I think it was an argument that escalated. Is he verbally abusing her continuously? Even so I still think it's a guard issue as I personally wouldn't want to draw an abusive man to my door. Madame B" I dunno what youre apologising to me for Madam. As this thread unfolded, you'll see further down the thread that Op said she heard the male of the couple calling the female " a fat ugly pig" with screaming and tears. Now thats not just a normal argument and from what i can gather its a continuous thing. Its emotional and psychological abuse which are the first stages to domestic violence,hence my comment.Its a bully that can demean and humiliate a woman in that manner. And furthermore, if that was happening to my neighbour on an ongoing basis and i knew about it, id be at his door telling him Im reporting him to the guards and Id not give a flying fuck what he thought of me or did! | |||
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"I'm not reading all the thread but is the male getting all the blame on this one?" Read the thread dontbesilly | |||
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"You should chill They are having a hard time, last thing they need is a nosey neighbour Let them work it " You try living next door to someone like that, | |||
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"2 sides to every neighbor dispute. Hard to judge when you only get one side I think they have pissed you off ignoring the child Ref to how he looks and the only guy in a group of girls. Is not relevant Id agree that how someone looks isnt relevant.For me, this sounds like emotional and psychological abuse being thrown back and forth between the neighbours.Now i might be jumping the gun in calling it emotional abuse, but that is in fact what it is. How much further will it go before it becomes a domestic violence issue and Op has done or said nothing about the early stages of it? A lot of people turn a blind eye to couples arguing and leave them to their own devices for being percieved as nosy. Can i ask you what would you do if you were in Op's situation? As I said in my post. There are 2 sides to every story , I wouldn't trivialise domestic abuse by attempting to make that judgment from the comfort of my office based on what the op has posted I think the op gave a different slant on the situation from their prospective when personal appearance and professions were highlighted Isnt that the thing though? Trivialising emotional abuse or domestic violence is whats wrong? Leave out the looks and appearance comments for a moment and look at the ongoing screaming matches between the couple. You think thats right because its not happening in your " office" . Thats whats called turning a blind eye. If they were your neighbours and you were to speak to the male half of the couple and tell him you can hear him, hed not be so brazen with his mouth the next time. Theres something wrong in this country when people ignore whats going on under their noses with neighbours or family members or whatever situation someone finds themselves in. It literally drives me to despair I am sorry but concern for the well-being wasn't mentioned at the start, it was about noise disturbance and while I don't condone nor would I ever trivialise domestic abuse. We have heard about one argument that kept op awake and when sending a polite letter didn't sort it out but actually strained issues between neighbours we then heard about that. Of course the noisy neighbours were not going to react well to the letter...They were not considerate of noise levels in the first place so sending a polite letter wasn't going to work. These kind of situations are awful but keep it neutral by letting the guards deal with it. If you think it's bad now after your letter...Imagine what they will be like after the landlord visits and they think you are trying to get them kicked out. From the information currently given... I think it's noise related and while not trying to diminish what is being said to that girl I think it was an argument that escalated. Is he verbally abusing her continuously? Even so I still think it's a guard issue as I personally wouldn't want to draw an abusive man to my door. Madame B I dunno what youre apologising to me for Madam. As this thread unfolded, you'll see further down the thread that Op said she heard the male of the couple calling the female " a fat ugly pig" with screaming and tears. Now thats not just a normal argument and from what i can gather its a continuous thing. Its emotional and psychological abuse which are the first stages to domestic violence,hence my comment.Its a bully that can demean and humiliate a woman in that manner. And furthermore, if that was happening to my neighbour on an ongoing basis and i knew about it, id be at his door telling him Im reporting him to the guards and Id not give a flying fuck what he thought of me or did! " You have taken the sorry out of context, I was making the point that the op opened a thread about noise disturbance. Again domestic abuse is a very serious matter which I would not make light of in any shape or form and I truly hope that couple figure it out...But I stand by my comment not to draw that to my door, I have others to consider as does the op. This is not a question about my abilities to stand up to bullies or yours. The op seeks a peaceful existence, drawing a potential abuser on her doorstep is not the way to achieve that. Standing up to bullies or for the underdog is admirable when you have all the facts but sometimes you have to stand back and let the professionals deal with it. I stand by my very first comment, let the guards deal with it and assess if that woman needs assistance. To put the ops mind at ease on her course of action, I would suggest ringing a DV helpline. Madame B | |||
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"Ok, the best thing you should do is list past disturbances and record any future. Either write it down and or record it on tape. Make a spreadsheet of when, how loud, words you heard etc and wait. If and when you patience finally goes (again) first contact the woman, it might jolt her into leaving his sorry ass. If no joy make a formal complaint to the landlord and the PRTB. " She may not want to leave - it may not be all his fault. She could be saying God knows what - just in a quieter voice. | |||
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"Ok, the best thing you should do is list past disturbances and record any future. Either write it down and or record it on tape. Make a spreadsheet of when, how loud, words you heard etc and wait. If and when you patience finally goes (again) first contact the woman, it might jolt her into leaving his sorry ass. If no joy make a formal complaint to the landlord and the PRTB. She may not want to leave - it may not be all his fault. She could be saying God knows what - just in a quieter voice. " I suppose my post was more concerned with stopping the noise than the dynamics of her neighbours relationship. | |||
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"Appreciate all the advice. Thank you. " from my own point of view stay clear | |||
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"Ok, the best thing you should do is list past disturbances and record any future. Either write it down and or record it on tape. Make a spreadsheet of when, how loud, words you heard etc and wait. If and when you patience finally goes (again) first contact the woman, it might jolt her into leaving his sorry ass. If no joy make a formal complaint to the landlord and the PRTB. She may not want to leave - it may not be all his fault. She could be saying God knows what - just in a quieter voice. I suppose my post was more concerned with stopping the noise than the dynamics of her neighbours relationship." I guess I misunderstood the bit where you said it might jolt her into leaving his sorry ass | |||
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"Madaam b totally different context but glad you know me so well We've heard about their body shapes, the night out with 7 girls, 1 lad and a disgruntled child. We've also had trial by third party evidence that he is a domestic abuser Let's get the lynch squad and take it into our own hands. Road trip to donegal anyone? Every couple fights, sometimes it's nasty but let them be. And why doesn't anyone like my brilliant loud sex analogy? " But the op has said she can't take it anymore which can have only 3 outcomes. They quieten down, they leave or she leaves. I'd be pissed if I only had the last option. | |||
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"Madaam b totally different context but glad you know me so well We've heard about their body shapes, the night out with 7 girls, 1 lad and a disgruntled child. We've also had trial by third party evidence that he is a domestic abuser Let's get the lynch squad and take it into our own hands. Road trip to donegal anyone? Every couple fights, sometimes it's nasty but let them be. And why doesn't anyone like my brilliant loud sex analogy? " Lol couldn't resist... I think of you whenever I use/hear the word Madame B | |||
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"Ok, the best thing you should do is list past disturbances and record any future. Either write it down and or record it on tape. Make a spreadsheet of when, how loud, words you heard etc and wait. If and when you patience finally goes (again) first contact the woman, it might jolt her into leaving his sorry ass. If no joy make a formal complaint to the landlord and the PRTB. " This is recommended by threshold, the tenancy agency to keep a list of all continued disturbances and the landlord is duty bound to deal with it. So you could go through the agency and they would deal with the landlord and tenants. It's not a nice situation to be in. Hope it gets resolved soon. Madame B | |||
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"Try living next door to a pig that thinks drinking every night music going all night his wife getting bounced not in a good way off the wall his kids scared screaming at him to stop . Police say they can't do anything council says so long as they pay the rent on time they won't put them out . " Question the council on that. They are wrong. Call the Police every time it happens - they'll have to do something | |||
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"Madaam b totally different context but glad you know me so well We've heard about their body shapes, the night out with 7 girls, 1 lad and a disgruntled child. We've also had trial by third party evidence that he is a domestic abuser Let's get the lynch squad and take it into our own hands. Road trip to donegal anyone? Every couple fights, sometimes it's nasty but let them be. And why doesn't anyone like my brilliant loud sex analogy? Lol couldn't resist... I think of you whenever I use/hear the word Madame B" Awww I'm often thinking of you as some sort of sexual mystic | |||
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"They have been fighting since November, I tried to ignore. Last night came home to hearing him shout at her. I've tried the letter. Dropped off a two cupcakes with a note "make love not war from your not wanting to hear neighbour". " Maybe the cupcakes were so tasty that they have been faking fights ever since in the hope of getting more? | |||
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"Madaam b totally different context but glad you know me so well We've heard about their body shapes, the night out with 7 girls, 1 lad and a disgruntled child. We've also had trial by third party evidence that he is a domestic abuser Let's get the lynch squad and take it into our own hands. Road trip to donegal anyone? Every couple fights, sometimes it's nasty but let them be. And why doesn't anyone like my brilliant loud sex analogy? Lol couldn't resist... I think of you whenever I use/hear the word Madame B Awww I'm often thinking of you as some sort of sexual mystic " Just your average horny little devil | |||
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"Try living next door to a pig that thinks drinking every night music going all night his wife getting bounced not in a good way off the wall his kids scared screaming at him to stop . Police say they can't do anything council says so long as they pay the rent on time they won't put them out . " If it's really loud call the police to have a record off it and is possible record on your phone if you hear screaming (in a violent way). | |||
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