FabSwingers.com forum: What makes you choose the first meet?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

iv been on a few weeks now and I can see why so many are frustrated. Most people want someone who's verified by meeting. So who takes the first step to verify newcomers? What makes them appealing? I need the advice lol

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By *etmebeurfantasyWoman
over a year ago

My town

It is very hard to get a meet if your not verified. And most socials will only allow verified users to attend. The last few weeks people have put on a meet for non verified, to meet to get that allusive green tick.

But some do meet newbies too .

Just keep trying keep an eye on the forums for other meets and socials and soon you will be off to a flying start.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your profile doesnt give much away about yourself and youve no pictures up. I think that would put a lot of people off

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Iv pictures up in friends section. I'm trying to be discrete lol. I realise that's not for everyone. Nobody has face pics up yet everyone expects them first. I assume we are all in the same boat and don't want anyone knowing our business!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes we are but rhwy dont have to be face pics

But please not 10 different angels of you c**k

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is not a profile critique op....but if you want to get noticed ...to stand out from the crowd. ....you have to go the extra mile....you say you're a suit wearing guy... well let everyone see the suits....just our humble opinion. ..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ha I think that would make it easy to identify me!! I suppose I could put them in friends section

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hang in there Dude

Its not all in the chase

Keep cool,calm

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ha I think that would make it easy to identify me!! I suppose I could put them in friends section"
.....ah here.....what kind of suits do you own? .....instantly recognisable? ....leave the head off?.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some of the hottest people I met on here were unverified newbies, and I honestly thought they were a catfish when we exchanged face pics, and it turned out they were even hotter in the flesh. Sometimes you just have to take a chance, and boy am I glad I did.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

To my work colleagues, yeah!!!lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To my work colleagues, yeah!!!lol"
.....ok....well that was our tuppence worth....good luck with the silhouette. ...

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By *wilighteyesWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

my decision on a meet is mostly humour, if someone makes me laugh their already ahead of the posse, if they have a brain thats even better,,,,,oh and a nice,,,,, back, i like backs,i know , strange but there ya go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ha I think that would make it easy to identify me!! I suppose I could put them in friends section.....ah here.....what kind of suits do you own? .....instantly recognisable? ....leave the head off?....."

Might be more of a uniform like McDonald's

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/04/16 08:28:39]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Iv pictures up in friends section. I'm trying to be discrete lol. I realise that's not for everyone. Nobody has face pics up yet everyone expects them first. I assume we are all in the same boat and don't want anyone knowing our business! "

I won't say "Nobody" I have face pics up , as do two single girls and one couple that I know of. And that's only in Dublin

Get some pics up, doesn't have to be a face pic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Might be more of a uniform like McDonald's

"
.....he said a suit....we were much too polite to suggest such a thing. ..

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By *ub_leitrim_guyMan
over a year ago

Out in the sticks

All you have to do is go to shop, try on suits and ask the salesperson to take a photo 'so you can see what it looks like on you'!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course these people who don't meet unverified newbies were never unverified newbies themselves.

Not very community spirited that....

Personally, it was through the chatroom that I got on the verification route.... Chatted with a few people regularly... Got an invite to an MnG....

Pm me if you think I can help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Might be more of a uniform like McDonald's

.....he said a suit....we were much too polite to suggest such a thing. ..

Might be a jumpsuit he could be a skyjumper

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By *imwildWoman
over a year ago

around

[Removed by poster at 13/04/16 08:53:28]

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By *imwildWoman
over a year ago

around

Correction OP. Not everyone expects face pics first or even at all!!

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By *excockMan
over a year ago

waterford

I don't meet unverified people.. unless they have a few pics that catch my eye and only then if we've chatted a bit and they've proved to me that they are what they say they are, either by kik or by sending a pic with a written message.

I know that sounds cruel. But because anyone can add a profile without any controls in place its the safest way and it cuts out Most of the crazies

I was lucky to get a couple of meets very quickly from couples which was fantastic.

I think there are some couples who like new swingers, virgins to fab.. maybe so they can corrupt them.. which I think is Great..else id still be looking for my first

I would say the main thing is keep chatting away to profiles or the forum..be polite..be prepared to prove ur real and things will fill into place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't meet unverified people.. unless they have a few pics that catch my eye and only then if we've chatted a bit and they've proved to me that they are what they say they are, either by kik or by sending a pic with a written message.

That's not really the same thing as people who will not meet unverified peeps at all.

Obviously not many will head off to coffee or a meet with a silhouette without taking the steps you refer to above but many want you to put in the work on their behalf before they will give the newbie any chance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course these people who don't meet unverified newbies were never unverified newbies themselves.

Not very community spirited that....

Personally, it was through the chatroom that I got on the verification route.... Chatted with a few people regularly... Got an invite to an MnG....

Pm me if you think I can help

"
....we think that the op got sound advice from a lot of people. ..community spirit is fine, but surely its a two way street? He doesn't seem to want to make an effort. ...our advice was to show himself in a suit. ..which he mentioned in his profile. ...sans head of course. .he was reluctant to do that.... we're just speaking personally of course. .but we would never meet without pics...not necessarily face pics....but pics of some description. ...which begs the question. ...would lack of effort with profile be mirrored in lack of effort at an actual meet. ....Please op...take this as its meant. ....constructive criticism. ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's the blanket ban that I was referring to not this specific case. See my reply to wex.

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By *excockMan
over a year ago

waterford

That's not really the same thing as people who will not meet unverified peeps at all.

True.. at the end of the day that's their choice.

People who have settled into the lifestyle may not be bothered with all the message tennis, backwards n forwards.. trying to work out if a person is genuine or not.

Plus couples n females probably get 100s of messages a week.. would any of us choose a non verified newbie over a well verified fabber in that case?

Maybe..but only if they stood out.

So personally I can see why people may not bother.

Having m&g's for newbies is probabily the best option

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's the blanket ban that I was referring to not this specific case. See my reply to wex."
...I haven't seen it...but I know what you're talking about. ..again ..that party thread is running a while. ...plenty of time to get verified, if you wanted to attend. ..as you have obviously. ....if fellow fabbers see that someone is trying. .. then the community spirit kicks in...

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By *excockMan
over a year ago

waterford

"It's the blanket ban that I was referring to not this specific case. See my reply to wex."

I wouldn't say there's a blanket ban.. else none of us single men would of gotten anywhere

But it takes effort.. a lot of effort, time and patience.. oh and more effort

I do think if there were stricter criteria on setting up a profile.. it would help all the genuine newbies hugely.. there's just too many messers on here.. so it puts people off newbies.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's the blanket ban that I was referring to not this specific case. See my reply to wex.

I wouldn't say there's a blanket ban.. else none of us single men would of gotten anywhere

But it takes effort.. a lot of effort, time and patience.. oh and more effort

I do think if there were stricter criteria on setting up a profile.. it would help all the genuine newbies hugely.. there's just too many messers on here.. so it puts people off newbies."

If I see another 18 yr old cum loving slut

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

"
....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

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By *excockMan
over a year ago

waterford

"It's the blanket ban that I was referring to not this specific case. See my reply to wex.

I wouldn't say there's a blanket ban.. else none of us single men would of gotten anywhere

But it takes effort.. a lot of effort, time and patience.. oh and more effort

I do think if there were stricter criteria on setting up a profile.. it would help all the genuine newbies hugely.. there's just too many messers on here.. so it puts people off newbies.

If I see another 18 yr old cum loving slut

Lol true... if only they were real

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By *excockMan
over a year ago

waterford

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

How did that happen? That's quick work!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe he works in a shadowy organisation and someone recognised his profile.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

How did that happen? That's quick work!!

"
...well problem solved. ..good luck op

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

For somebody that's here a week your an absolute oracle of knowledge ,Thank heavens your here .I am totally lost as to how the site functioned at all before your joined

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By *ub_leitrim_guyMan
over a year ago

Out in the sticks

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

Unpublished too! Might be the hotel receptionist??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

For somebody that's here a week your an absolute oracle of knowledge ,Thank heavens your here .I am totally lost as to how the site functioned at all before your joined

"
...ah you have to be here a while before you know anything. ....?...I'll be a complete know it all by the time im here a month. .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

For somebody that's here a week your an absolute oracle of knowledge ,Thank heavens your here .I am totally lost as to how the site functioned at all before your joined

...ah you have to be here a while before you know anything. ....?...I'll be a complete know it all by the time im here a month. .

I think praise is order I would say your running well ahead of schedule there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

For somebody that's here a week your an absolute oracle of knowledge ,Thank heavens your here .I am totally lost as to how the site functioned at all before your joined

...ah you have to be here a while before you know anything. ....?...I'll be a complete know it all by the time im here a month. .

I think praise is order I would say your running well ahead of schedule there

"
....Please. .you're much too kind....you're gonna have to take some of the credit for the smooth running of the site.....After all. ...you're a veteran. ...Four weeks. ....we can only aspire to that longevity. ..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

You have to be verified to post. I was verified first. No offence taken btw

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe he works in a shadowy organisation and someone recognised his profile....."

Haha, no no. I'm just cautious.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for all the advice guys. But to clarify. I have pics. They're just in friends section. I was wondering what made people decide to meet or even start chatting. Just looking for your stories not advice for my profile lol. Thanks anyways tho ??

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By *isdirtygirlWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

Youve said on your status you hate being wasteful but you are being wasteful cos youve nothing on show to entice...open your profile and put some pics on public view. For me im visual, if i like what i see, ill chase

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's just the privacy issue for me. But good to know you like the chase. I'm the same. The kill taste so much sweeter

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By *isdirtygirlWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"It's just the privacy issue for me. But good to know you like the chase. I'm the same. The kill taste so much sweeter "

We all have privacy issues, posting a few torso,ass pics, or suit pics(as you wear them) isnt a big deal if youre face isnt in them or blacked out. Thats my opinion by the way,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP was verified on Wednesday. Obviously the thread ploy worked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where dose the bullshit stop,looked to go to a meet and greet, I am verified in person, got a reply looking for a face photo because I am not well verified enough, hard to get people to chat with don't mind getting to meet, but people keep changing the rules to sute them self and keep guinne people on the outside

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened thek thread....did that escape you're notice......?

You have to be verified to post. I was verified first. No offence taken btw "
.....dunno what your game is tbh.....but you're verification came up wed as being verified 40 mins.....of course looking back, you had to be verified to post......no offence taken?.....for what....?. A few posters have mentioned that you show torso pics with face obscured. ..but you keep talking about privacy. ...?. Anyway. ..good luck. ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

You have to be verified to post. I was verified first. No offence taken btw "

You don't need the green tick to post. Photo verification is enough. So yes you could post before being meet verified.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

You have to be verified to post. I was verified first. No offence taken btw

You don't need the green tick to post. Photo verification is enough. So yes you could post before being meet verified. "
yes..gor you now...a bit disingenuous of thw op to say he was verified. ..when he clearly wasn't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

You have to be verified to post. I was verified first. No offence taken btw

You don't need the green tick to post. Photo verification is enough. So yes you could post before being meet verified. yes..gor you now...a bit disingenuous of thw op to say he was verified. ..when he clearly wasn't"

I was a bit confused to be honest. Clearly he was verified after he posted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sure keep chatting away there between yourselves the salient point that the OP is verified seems to have escaped your notice .

So all that great advice was in vain I guess , all you really need is an empty hotel room lol

....verified 40 mins ago....not when he opened the thread....did that escape you're notice......?

You have to be verified to post. I was verified first. No offence taken btw

I was a bit confused to be honest. Clearly he was verified after he posted. "
...lol..love to learn that trick...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where dose the bullshit stop,looked to go to a meet and greet, I am verified in person, got a reply looking for a face photo because I am not well verified enough, hard to get people to chat with don't mind getting to meet, but people keep changing the rules to sute them self and keep guinne people on the outside"

That's to stop people from exposing said events to people not coming or worse exposing it to a local paper like in Carlo a couple of years ago.

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By *andyrackkyMan
over a year ago

South

I'm in the same boat the OP, at this for weeks and can't get the first meet even, kinda frustrating and I want to keep going because I know there's decent people out there but it can be disheartening.

Good luck OP in your search, I'm sure everything will come up trumps in the end

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm in the same boat the OP, at this for weeks and can't get the first meet even, kinda frustrating and I want to keep going because I know there's decent people out there but it can be disheartening.

Good luck OP in your search, I'm sure everything will come up trumps in the end

"
....the op got verified. ...maybe he can give you some pointers. ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If the OP wants to be a good member of the community, then be a member of the community.

You are a single guy. You need to be different from all the other single guys, or different enough.

If you are looking to meet women or couples then you need to be presentable. Look your best to attract people. If you have a really strong watch game, show your watches off. If you are well dressed show it off.

I'm from a small town. I don't want people knowing my business either. But remember, if your work colleagues are here and see you, then they are swingers too.

They only have leverage if you give it to them

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By *ekerishornyMan
over a year ago

dublin

Very tricky for newbies here even if you are not new to the swinging world i was a member on aff years ago and since then it seems a bit more tricky for the new guys for sure just be yourself and meets will come happy swinging all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/04/16 13:29:02]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If the OP wants to be a good member of the community, then be a member of the community.

You are a single guy. You need to be different from all the other single guys, or different enough.

I'm from a small town. I don't want people knowing my business either. But remember, if your work colleagues are here and see you, then they are swingers too.

They only have leverage if you give it to them

Nice red arse recognise it anywhere

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By *andyrackkyMan
over a year ago

South

Good luck OP in your search, I'm sure everything will come up trumps in the end

....the op got verified. ...maybe he can give you some pointers. .."

Ye would be greatly obliged.....any help at this time will do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If the OP wants to be a good member of the community, then be a member of the community.

You are a single guy. You need to be different from all the other single guys, or different enough.

I'm from a small town. I don't want people knowing my business either. But remember, if your work colleagues are here and see you, then they are swingers too.

They only have leverage if you give it to them

Nice red arse recognise it anywhere

I agree 100%

She does have a great arse.

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