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"I disagree, everyone one is an individual and its to broad a statement. " Agreed, people are engaged in non-monogamy for a whole slew of different reasons- and the effects very widely. One could just as easily state that monogamy takes greater mental strength and it would be an equally meaningless generalisation. | |||
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"I disagree, everyone one is an individual and its to broad a statement. Agreed, people are engaged in non-monogamy for a whole slew of different reasons- and the effects very widely. One could just as easily state that monogamy takes greater mental strength and it would be an equally meaningless generalisation." *vary | |||
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"Ive a question for you lovely people. Answer honestly and remember,opinions will differ so be nice to each other. Are Swingers Mentally Stonger than Monogamous People??? if yes or no,give your reasons why.( I include couples and singles in this so i dont need any opinions of" singles arent really swingers" yada yada). " No I'd say mentally weaker based on my experiences | |||
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"Mentally stronger? Based on some forum posts and mails that people get I'd have to say no. " Are you saying there's a few unhinged folk here? | |||
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"I don't think so, it's a personal choice! If two people are in a happy loving relationship and just want each other, I don't see anything wrong with that ! I'd imagine some men for eg, their stomach would turn at the thought of another man shagging their wife, just my view " According to my husband most men fantazise about seeing their wife being shagged by another man. That doesn't mean it ever has to happen. He gets off on both reality and fantasy, as do most men here I would imagine. Mentally stronger though? I'd say more aware of their own emotions and limits. Which in itself is mentally strong. XxMrs S | |||
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"I don't think so, it's a personal choice! If two people are in a happy loving relationship and just want each other, I don't see anything wrong with that ! I'd imagine some men for eg, their stomach would turn at the thought of another man shagging their wife, just my view According to my husband most men fantazise about seeing their wife being shagged by another man. That doesn't mean it ever has to happen. He gets off on both reality and fantasy, as do most men here I would imagine. Mentally stronger though? I'd say more aware of their own emotions and limits. Which in itself is mentally strong. XxMrs S" i can't comment on that, I'm not married! If I was married would I be here with my wife?? I'm not sure! | |||
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"I don't think so, it's a personal choice! If two people are in a happy loving relationship and just want each other, I don't see anything wrong with that ! I'd imagine some men for eg, their stomach would turn at the thought of another man shagging their wife, just my view According to my husband most men fantazise about seeing their wife being shagged by another man. That doesn't mean it ever has to happen. He gets off on both reality and fantasy, as do most men here I would imagine. Mentally stronger though? I'd say more aware of their own emotions and limits. Which in itself is mentally strong. XxMrs Si can't comment on that, I'm not married! If I was married would I be here with my wife?? I'm not sure! " Insert partner for wife. And as I wrote above, they fantazise, which doesn't mean it has to become reality. | |||
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"Mentally stronger? Based on some forum posts and mails that people get I'd have to say no. " Now now Michael Murphy be nice | |||
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"I don't think so, it's a personal choice! If two people are in a happy loving relationship and just want each other, I don't see anything wrong with that ! I'd imagine some men for eg, their stomach would turn at the thought of another man shagging their wife, just my view According to my husband most men fantazise about seeing their wife being shagged by another man. That doesn't mean it ever has to happen. He gets off on both reality and fantasy, as do most men here I would imagine. Mentally stronger though? I'd say more aware of their own emotions and limits. Which in itself is mentally strong. XxMrs Si can't comment on that, I'm not married! If I was married would I be here with my wife?? I'm not sure! " Hmm, most likely you the would be here without your wife...once a fabber, always a fabber | |||
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"Don't see any reason why they would be however i would say that they are definitely more tolerant, liberated and broadminded than the average vanill-ian." | |||
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"Don't see any reason why they would be however i would say that they are definitely more tolerant, liberated and broadminded than the average vanill-ian." I would have to agree with this, I would also say that swinging definitely made us a much stronger couple and although our relationship was solid to begin with we are closer than ever since we started swinging but whether or not we're more mentally strong who knows? | |||
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"Ive a question for you lovely people. Answer honestly and remember,opinions will differ so be nice to each other. Are Swingers Mentally Stonger than Monogamous People??? if yes or no,give your reasons why.( I include couples and singles in this so i dont need any opinions of" singles arent really swingers" yada yada). " I would say it's down to the individual. I wouldn't make a sweeping generalisation that they are stronger or as some said weaker. Just my opinion. Tomcat | |||
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"I haven't noticed...what makes you think this Missy?" Not sure what prompted me Candy... i was wondering whether swinger relationships are more "solid"than monogamous i suppose. The comments and depth to the replies has been surprising and given me food for thought. | |||
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"I most certainly would not say every couple should swing! Just to add that point! Some want just themselves within a loving relationship " | |||
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"Not sure I would agree or disagree ..I believe this lifestyle is multi facested ...can both build one up and tear one apart emotionally and mentally if one were to allow it to do so ....some take this lifestyle way too serious and permit it to become all comsuming...I personally enjoy it for what it is ...light hearted entertainment with fun out going and gorgeous people and the fact that my best friend in this world is with me as we play makes it all the better Apples" I hope that's me you're talking about. ...lol Ollie...xx As for the thread, I've become more confident and I believe mentally stronger this last past 18 months....might be the site..might be something else... Sertainly it has not been boring! | |||
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"I think you need to always enjoy it and when you don't ...stop or take a break. Also discuss boundaries frequently and don't make it the focus of your life together, we look on it, as a bit of fun, extra to us as a loving couple. " I agree with this 100%.. | |||
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"I think you need to always enjoy it and when you don't ...stop or take a break. Also discuss boundaries frequently and don't make it the focus of your life together, we look on it, as a bit of fun, extra to us as a loving couple. I agree with this 100%.. " We agree too. How some people allow swinging to become their primary focus in life and their everyday life to become secondary we will never understand. We see swinging as an occasional bit of excitement and fun. Nothing more. | |||
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"I think you need to always enjoy it and when you don't ...stop or take a break. Also discuss boundaries frequently and don't make it the focus of your life together, we look on it, as a bit of fun, extra to us as a loving couple. I agree with this 100%.. We agree too. How some people allow swinging to become their primary focus in life and their everyday life to become secondary we will never understand. We see swinging as an occasional bit of excitement and fun. Nothing more. " I wasnt asking whether swing was a primary focus guys,i asked were swingers ( as in yourselves as a couple) mentally stronger than monogamous couples. Emotion,feelings towards each other with regard to playing with other couples and singles. | |||
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"I think you need to always enjoy it and when you don't ...stop or take a break. Also discuss boundaries frequently and don't make it the focus of your life together, we look on it, as a bit of fun, extra to us as a loving couple. I agree with this 100%.. We agree too. How some people allow swinging to become their primary focus in life and their everyday life to become secondary we will never understand. We see swinging as an occasional bit of excitement and fun. Nothing more. I wasnt asking whether swing was a primary focus guys,i asked were swingers ( as in yourselves as a couple) mentally stronger than monogamous couples. Emotion,feelings towards each other with regard to playing with other couples and singles. " Sorry went off at a tangent No I dont think mentally stronger but definitely emotionally more mature | |||
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"I think you need to always enjoy it and when you don't ...stop or take a break. Also discuss boundaries frequently and don't make it the focus of your life together, we look on it, as a bit of fun, extra to us as a loving couple. I agree with this 100%.. We agree too. How some people allow swinging to become their primary focus in life and their everyday life to become secondary we will never understand. We see swinging as an occasional bit of excitement and fun. Nothing more. I wasnt asking whether swing was a primary focus guys,i asked were swingers ( as in yourselves as a couple) mentally stronger than monogamous couples. Emotion,feelings towards each other with regard to playing with other couples and singles. Sorry went off at a tangent No I dont think mentally stronger but definitely emotionally more mature " Thats what im getting at,are your emotions kept for each other where youd not give play partners a second thought other than liking them of course | |||
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"Not sure I would agree or disagree ..I believe this lifestyle is multi facested ...can both build one up and tear one apart emotionally and mentally if one were to allow it to do so ....some take this lifestyle way too serious and permit it to become all comsuming...I personally enjoy it for what it is ...light hearted entertainment with fun out going and gorgeous people and the fact that my best friend in this world is with me as we play makes it all the better Apples" I think a lot depends on why you joined but the above post is on the money. | |||
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"I don't think so, it's a personal choice! If two people are in a happy loving relationship and just want each other, I don't see anything wrong with that ! I'd imagine some men for eg, their stomach would turn at the thought of another man shagging their wife, just my view According to my husband most men fantazise about seeing their wife being shagged by another man. That doesn't mean it ever has to happen. He gets off on both reality and fantasy, as do most men here I would imagine. Mentally stronger though? I'd say more aware of their own emotions and limits. Which in itself is mentally strong. XxMrs Si can't comment on that, I'm not married! If I was married would I be here with my wife?? I'm not sure! " double standards....just a maybe? | |||
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"Ms dirty girl Yes you can be very fond of play partners and of course some just hit the spot and you really like them! But my deeper emotions, including love, are entirely reserved for Alan. This separation is an aspect that doesn't work for many people and that's why swinging can put a major strain on many couples in my humble opinion. Also depends on where you start from. If you are doing this to resolve issues forget it! And if I felt swinging was putting any strain on us As a couple, I would stop immediately because we come first. I am also realistic enough to know, there are many gorgeous better looking women and guys on here, which is also why we don't tend to repeat meet especially with singles. We're not looking for attachment. In fact that detracts from the sexiness for me personally. Which is why I love group sex. We are also attracted to happy couples where you can see they are attracted to each other. Sam" Excellent post Sam... thank you x | |||
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"We will never play apart We think you are heading for affair territory when you do because you are bound to grow close to someone especially if you meet them more than once Dirty one offs for us lol " Don't think we would ever play apart either !! | |||
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"I think you need to always enjoy it and when you don't ...stop or take a break. Also discuss boundaries frequently and don't make it the focus of your life together, we look on it, as a bit of fun, extra to us as a loving couple. I agree with this 100%.. We agree too. How some people allow swinging to become their primary focus in life and their everyday life to become secondary we will never understand. We see swinging as an occasional bit of excitement and fun. Nothing more. I wasnt asking whether swing was a primary focus guys,i asked were swingers ( as in yourselves as a couple) mentally stronger than monogamous couples. Emotion,feelings towards each other with regard to playing with other couples and singles. " Apologies for going off topic, was agreeing with the post above us and elaborating further. To answer your question, mentally stronger? No I don't believe so. Emotionally stronger? I'd say yes to that. We're in love with each other. We fancy others in a physical way, but never emotionally. That's kept strictly for ourselves | |||
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"I think you need to always enjoy it and when you don't ...stop or take a break. Also discuss boundaries frequently and don't make it the focus of your life together, we look on it, as a bit of fun, extra to us as a loving couple. I agree with this 100%.. We agree too. How some people allow swinging to become their primary focus in life and their everyday life to become secondary we will never understand. We see swinging as an occasional bit of excitement and fun. Nothing more. I wasnt asking whether swing was a primary focus guys,i asked were swingers ( as in yourselves as a couple) mentally stronger than monogamous couples. Emotion,feelings towards each other with regard to playing with other couples and singles. Apologies for going off topic, was agreeing with the post above us and elaborating further. To answer your question, mentally stronger? No I don't believe so. Emotionally stronger? I'd say yes to that. We're in love with each other. We fancy others in a physical way, but never emotionally. That's kept strictly for ourselves " No apologies needed folks,todays answers have been very educational as well as insightful...id forgotten what it was like to be "the other half" cheers for your comments | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol " Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol " somehow I don't think you've got the hang of swinging...hilarious get a grip fks. | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol " And people wonder why under 30s are considered immature.. | |||
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"I don't think there are any 2 people alike here. The whole swinging scene is a little surreal at first but the notion is far more strange than the reality. People are just people at the end of it all. The swinging scene isn't treated as an individual thing at all by most I've chatted with-there's all sorts here from the possessive to the wreckless and carefree-just as in 'real life'" | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol " | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. " I agree with missdirtygirl it would be a devastating thing to happen for all people involved. I'm sure it has happened in past to people. I feel to be emotionally and mentally in a good place helps your swinging experiences to be more enjoyable. Of your not in a good place it can make you insecure and put you through a lot of emotional turmoil and I personally would get out of the game if I started to feel that way.. | |||
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"Mentally stronger? Based on some forum posts and mails that people get I'd have to say no. " I'd have to agree with John. There are many mentally weaker people in this lifestyle from what I see and hear through mails and certain replies to posts. I'm no psychologist, but through my work, I know people. Another issue which continues to astound me is the amount of guys here which obviously don't understand the word 'straight'. They read your profile which states u are straight, their profile states that they are 'straight' but yet continue to ask for their cock sucked ... Soz, rant over | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. " Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single " You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start? | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start?" the difference is, your having sex in my view | |||
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"Trust and communication is paramount, you have to prioritise each other and your relationship - just as a monogamous couple do." trust I'd imagine is huge but as some say you can't control your feelings | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start?the difference is, your having sex in my view " An emotional bond with another is far more destructive - unless you are someone who cannot separate the two, in which case swinging was never going to be a good idea, was it? | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start?the difference is, your having sex in my view " Couples who swing are less likely to cheat or have affairs though Whip, the "threat" (if thats the right word) is eliminated from a relationship as both are effectively agreeing to have sex with other people | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start?the difference is, your having sex in my view An emotional bond with another is far more destructive - unless you are someone who cannot separate the two, in which case swinging was never going to be a good idea, was it? " a bond between both which has a big chance of developing the more time you spend with each other I would say! I can easily separate emotions have done all my life but I have found some women struggle to do so | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start?the difference is, your having sex in my view An emotional bond with another is far more destructive - unless you are someone who cannot separate the two, in which case swinging was never going to be a good idea, was it? a bond between both which has a big chance of developing the more time you spend with each other I would say! I can easily separate emotions have done all my life but I have found some women struggle to do so " I know when i was married and was part of a couple,id a deep love for my husband and although i found others sexually attractive and played with the same couples for a long time,there was always a barrier there,a line nobody crossed. Probably out of respect for others involved but also out of respect for him and him for me. | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start?the difference is, your having sex in my view An emotional bond with another is far more destructive - unless you are someone who cannot separate the two, in which case swinging was never going to be a good idea, was it? a bond between both which has a big chance of developing the more time you spend with each other I would say! I can easily separate emotions have done all my life but I have found some women struggle to do so I know when i was married and was part of a couple,id a deep love for my husband and although i found others sexually attractive and played with the same couples for a long time,there was always a barrier there,a line nobody crossed. Probably out of respect for others involved but also out of respect for him and him for me. " I'd say that's the way it is with most! All I'm saying is I'd say feelings sometime intervene with a few | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start?the difference is, your having sex in my view An emotional bond with another is far more destructive - unless you are someone who cannot separate the two, in which case swinging was never going to be a good idea, was it? a bond between both which has a big chance of developing the more time you spend with each other I would say! I can easily separate emotions have done all my life but I have found some women struggle to do so I know when i was married and was part of a couple,id a deep love for my husband and although i found others sexually attractive and played with the same couples for a long time,there was always a barrier there,a line nobody crossed. Probably out of respect for others involved but also out of respect for him and him for me. " Thats it in a nutshell.If you're coming here with the nsa mind set and you have a genuine respect and love for your other half there's no reason why feelings should develop. | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start?the difference is, your having sex in my view An emotional bond with another is far more destructive - unless you are someone who cannot separate the two, in which case swinging was never going to be a good idea, was it? a bond between both which has a big chance of developing the more time you spend with each other I would say! I can easily separate emotions have done all my life but I have found some women struggle to do so I know when i was married and was part of a couple,id a deep love for my husband and although i found others sexually attractive and played with the same couples for a long time,there was always a barrier there,a line nobody crossed. Probably out of respect for others involved but also out of respect for him and him for me. I'd say that's the way it is with most! All I'm saying is I'd say feelings sometime intervene with a few " And even then it is something that can be worked past if the couple remain honest with each other - just as in a monogamous relationship, it is dishonesty and secrecy that destroys the bond. It is normal to find others attractive at times, its a question of knowing where your priorities and loyalties lie. | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start?the difference is, your having sex in my view An emotional bond with another is far more destructive - unless you are someone who cannot separate the two, in which case swinging was never going to be a good idea, was it? a bond between both which has a big chance of developing the more time you spend with each other I would say! I can easily separate emotions have done all my life but I have found some women struggle to do so I know when i was married and was part of a couple,id a deep love for my husband and although i found others sexually attractive and played with the same couples for a long time,there was always a barrier there,a line nobody crossed. Probably out of respect for others involved but also out of respect for him and him for me. I'd say that's the way it is with most! All I'm saying is I'd say feelings sometime intervene with a few " A lot of the time people mistake love for lust and confuse the two. Ive liked all the partners i had sex with in my married life and loved them too but was never in love with any of them. | |||
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"What would be hilarious is if a couple kept meeting another couple male or female and one party or more then one got extremely deep feelings! Work that awkward one out lol Hilarious?? God no... id say all parties involved would be very hurt and utterly devastated whether it was their wife or husband. Isn't that the risk u take by meeting regularly and they becoming an active part or your life? It's totally different as a single You run that risk with anyone you meet at work, as a friend/neighbour/whatever anyway - how do you think affairs start?the difference is, your having sex in my view An emotional bond with another is far more destructive - unless you are someone who cannot separate the two, in which case swinging was never going to be a good idea, was it? a bond between both which has a big chance of developing the more time you spend with each other I would say! I can easily separate emotions have done all my life but I have found some women struggle to do so I know when i was married and was part of a couple,id a deep love for my husband and although i found others sexually attractive and played with the same couples for a long time,there was always a barrier there,a line nobody crossed. Probably out of respect for others involved but also out of respect for him and him for me. I'd say that's the way it is with most! All I'm saying is I'd say feelings sometime intervene with a few And even then it is something that can be worked past if the couple remain honest with each other - just as in a monogamous relationship, it is dishonesty and secrecy that destroys the bond. It is normal to find others attractive at times, its a question of knowing where your priorities and loyalties lie. " fair play to those who do and each to their own and all that | |||
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