FabSwingers.com forum: veet hair remover feedback.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits.

Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus's birthday as a bit of a treat.I ordered it well in advance and working as a trucker I considered myself a bit above some of the characters that didn't like pain. how wrong I was.

I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.

At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.

Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the destruction of the meat and two veg.

Struggling to not bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel of in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair.Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief.

I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, tore the lid of and positioned it under me. The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing soon returned.

Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon. I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse.

This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found it's way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running it's engines behind me.This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.

The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before.

Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering " Ooooh that feels good "

Understandingly this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn't heard her come in it caused an involuntary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction.

I can understand that having a sprout farted against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the kids the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status

So to sum it up Veet removes hair, dignity and self respect

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks Amazon...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Soooo funny love it! Stick to shaving in future

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in stitches here ya mad f@&ker. No patch test for you then lol

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By *ilderMan
over a year ago

dublin

An amateur mistake if I ever heard one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Immac mistakes all the time lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Seen it on another site and just had to share it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good laugh thanks I needed that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seen it on another site and just had to share it. "

It a class one

and just sums up the horrors of veet lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks for the giggle

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By *eth TVTV/TS
over a year ago

Mid Meath

Immac/Veet is evil

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By *avie tCouple
over a year ago

otherside of nowhere

Thanks for the laugh ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll still use the veet lol!!! I find the veet scraper thing that comes in the pack, that's helps to get the hair off instead of just washing it off as I had been originally told to do.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd heard about the Veet effect before so my version of hair removal is this,I had bought this big bottle of shaving oil for my face,it was like that stuff "King of shaves" only 10 times the size,anyway I was going through a shaving tight down below phase and used this stuf and it worked out great,smooth as a babys arse.I decided to try it a few days later as a wank lube,was great for that too,tingly and slightly irritating but in a horny way,so I used it for a few days and noticed that I was getting hard all the time and in awkward situations,chatting with attractive shop assistants,bargirls etc,so it was getting to be annoying after a few days,it took loads of soapy washing to finally get rid of it,then I noticed my cock was really sore from all the wankin',something in the oil had dulled the soreness.At this point it's time I mentioned that I soothe my feet with toothpaste if I've been doing a lot of walking,so you can guess the rest,I put toothpaste on my cock to soothe it,the relief was instant,a wonderful cooling sensation ahhhhhh joy,so I gave ole paddy pecker a bit of a choking using the paste as lube,shame to waste it an all,about 5 mins into it,jaysus I howled wtf,it was like someone was tightening a vice around him,the effin' torture of it swelling and throbbing so soon after the cooling relief,nearly made me pass out. I hoped into the shower and washed it off as fast as I could and sat on a towel on the sofa with a bag of frozen peas til they melted.

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By *ceryMan
over a year ago

Malahide & Waterford

"I'd heard about the Veet effect before so my version of hair removal is this,I had bought this big bottle of shaving oil for my face,it was like that stuff "King of shaves" only 10 times the size,anyway I was going through a shaving tight down below phase and used this stuf and it worked out great,smooth as a babys arse.I decided to try it a few days later as a wank lube,was great for that too,tingly and slightly irritating but in a horny way,so I used it for a few days and noticed that I was getting hard all the time and in awkward situations,chatting with attractive shop assistants,bargirls etc,so it was getting to be annoying after a few days,it took loads of soapy washing to finally get rid of it,then I noticed my cock was really sore from all the wankin',something in the oil had dulled the soreness.At this point it's time I mentioned that I soothe my feet with toothpaste if I've been doing a lot of walking,so you can guess the rest,I put toothpaste on my cock to soothe it,the relief was instant,a wonderful cooling sensation ahhhhhh joy,so I gave ole paddy pecker a bit of a choking using the paste as lube,shame to waste it an all,about 5 mins into it,jaysus I howled wtf,it was like someone was tightening a vice around him,the effin' torture of it swelling and throbbing so soon after the cooling relief,nearly made me pass out. I hoped into the shower and washed it off as fast as I could and sat on a towel on the sofa with a bag of frozen peas til they melted."

See what u get for being your own chemist..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

See what u get for being your own chemist..

Lol,yep experience is a great teacher and the memory will never leave me.

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By *aid backMan
over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

I use veet now instead of shaving its great stuff and it doesn't burn at all

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By *eth TVTV/TS
over a year ago

Mid Meath

"I'll still use the veet lol!!! I find the veet scraper thing that comes in the pack, that's helps to get the hair off instead of just washing it off as I had been originally told to do.....

I use one called Dimples and find it far less harsh and more effective

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I use veet now instead of shaving its great stuff and it doesn't burn at all "

You must have the hide of a rhino and very soft hair then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must have sensitive skin because when I was shaving,neatly trimmed now,I got 3 ingrown hairs in a yr,I attacked 2 of them with veruca drops which I got in the chemists,now I have 2 scars on my shaft.

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By *eth TVTV/TS
over a year ago

Mid Meath

"I must have sensitive skin because when I was shaving,neatly trimmed now,I got 3 ingrown hairs in a yr,I attacked 2 of them with veruca drops which I got in the chemists,now I have 2 scars on my shaft.

Exfoliating before and afterwards reduces your chances of ingrown hairs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Randy....did you see a doctor or a vet?

why? Just why?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Randy....did you see a doctor or a vet?

why? Just why?"

I was peed off and just them gone soon as possible,they took ages to heal as well,not one of my brightest ideas that one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Randy....did you see a doctor or a vet?

why? Just why?

I was peed off and just them gone soon as possible,they took ages to heal as well,not one of my brightest ideas that one.

Wanted them gone.

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By *ohn MingoMan
over a year ago

Dublin

"I use veet now instead of shaving its great stuff and it doesn't burn at all "

Same here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just grow balls and wax the fluff lads

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By *hrisboobymanMan
over a year ago

Newtownabbey

Ha ha, just let it grow and perm it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ha ha, just let it grow and perm it

And tie a nice pink bow on it pmsl!!!

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