FabSwingers.com forum: Judging a book by its cover

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I am a typical average guy and nothing special to look at, although I can be somewhat very witty which you cant tell from my pics.

Anywise, when I look at other public pics (guilty of pervin - your honour!) I immediately think some are way out of league so it puts me off messaging them even though I meet their preferences.

I know I have a confidence issue but was wondering if anyone else thinks the same and put off messaging others??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am a typical average guy and nothing special to look at, although I can be somewhat very witty which you cant tell from my pics.

Anywise, when I look at other public pics (guilty of pervin - your honour!) I immediately think some are way out of league so it puts me off messaging them even though I meet their preferences.

I know I have a confidence issue but was wondering if anyone else thinks the same and put off messaging others??"

Ah shur ya gotta try, how are people supposed to know how "witty" you are if ya don't contact, and you don't know what there "league" is, just because they're hot as fook don't mean that they only go for super hot people. beauty,for many people, is down to personality as well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm the same here get intimidated easily that's why I like going to socials and m&g you actually get to meet people most don't resemble their boobs or bums anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Exactly the same here !! Very very rarely send a first msg ... Maybe its bad on my part but nerves always get the better of me !!

As the lovely miscarr said socials are great & I find if your involved on d forums people get to know your personality better !!

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By *aughtyTippcplCouple
over a year ago

Nearby

Same here, confidence is a bit of an issue with me.

I'm even conscious of my pics on here.

I rarely send a first message, in fact I did it this morning and was very nervous doing so. Us as a cpl see ppl checking out our profile sometimes numerous times daily and wonder why we're not contacted.

We don't bite and we're always willing to chat to new ppl. Maybe OP we both need to not be so self conscious and take a risk now and again. Worst anyone can say is no

Tina

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're not alone OP. I'm the exact same, major confidence issues dwell here.

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By *oughandCurvyCouple
over a year ago

galway

This happens to us all the time, you just have to think F it whats the worst that could happen and just go for it anyway.... easier said than done i guess.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same here i have big confidence issues!i dunno what else to say!lol

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By *etmebeurfantasyWoman
over a year ago

My town

SaMe here op

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for all your kind replies and its reassuring i am not alone in my own security.

I know there's lovely ppl on here and your response evidence that big time.

Thanks again!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Heres a thought maybe if someone has talked to someone on this thread maybe if they listed there qualities they liked!what do you think folks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can guarantee disappointment at a first meet,unless there's a power outage

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By *aughtyTippcplCouple
over a year ago

Nearby

"Heres a thought maybe if someone has talked to someone on this thread maybe if they listed there qualities they liked!what do you think folks."

I don't think I've chatted to anyone on the thread, not from not wanting to, but from pure shyness and nervousness

Tina

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Awe tina you should try there are some lovely people on here!

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By *aughtyTippcplCouple
over a year ago

Nearby

"Awe tina you should try there are some lovely people on here!

Always afraid to make the 1st move Pedro

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well tina hello i would love to chat but i cant but i believe you would be a lovely person to talk with!

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By *ay and DeborahCouple
over a year ago

Co. Down

Same here...very rarely contact first but always happy and surprised when we do get the odd message or two!

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By *aughtyTippcplCouple
over a year ago

Nearby

"Well tina hello i would love to chat but i cant but i believe you would be a lovely person to talk with!

Hello Pedro

U can't?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Heres a thought maybe if someone has talked to someone on this thread maybe if they listed there qualities they liked!what do you think folks.

I don't think I've chatted to anyone on the thread, not from not wanting to, but from pure shyness and nervousness

Tina

Aww Tina youre a lovely person. I would chat to you anytime.

Once started talking you would have to tell me to be quiet lol.

Thanks for sharing with me x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find with men if I like a profile I'll contact them but I find I'm a lot slower and lacking a lot more confidence when it comes to the ladies unless I know I'm going to be at a gathering with them then I'll always introduce myself and have met some really class A nutters and wouldn't have it any other way they have become great friends

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By *aughtyTippcplCouple
over a year ago

Nearby

"I find with men if I like a profile I'll contact them but I find I'm a lot slower and lacking a lot more confidence when it comes to the ladies unless I know I'm going to be at a gathering with them then I'll always introduce myself and have met some really class A nutters and wouldn't have it any other way they have become great friends

We get cpls and males that will chat us but we'd love to chat to more women. I'd have no problem chatting to u

Tina

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well tina hello i would love to chat but i cant but i believe you would be a lovely person to talk with!

Hello Pedro

U can't?

"
no tina its says youve blocked my sex!no wonder i felt frustrated!lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We get cpls and males that will chat us but we'd love to chat to more women. I'd have no problem chatting to u

Tina

"
awh thank you Tina xx

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By *aughtyTippcplCouple
over a year ago

Nearby

"Well tina hello i would love to chat but i cant but i believe you would be a lovely person to talk with!

Hello Pedro

U can't?

no tina its says youve blocked my sex!no wonder i felt frustrated!lol

Oh fook, we turned on filters a while back due to nasty messages.

Meant to change them again

Hang on Pedro, 2 secs

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By *aughtyTippcplCouple
over a year ago

Nearby

Try now?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Same here...very rarely contact first but always happy and surprised when we do get the odd message or two!"

Hi. Nice to know I am not the only one feeling good when i get messages from new people - although this is a very rare thing for lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Try now?

"
sent xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pedro wicked sense humour, miscarr sexy lady n upforfun82 lovely girl with cute smile xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Same here...very rarely contact first but always happy and surprised when we do get the odd message or two!

Hi. Nice to know I am not the only one feeling good when i get messages from new people - although this is a very rare thing for lol"

Hello x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just say wtf chance me arm and send a message now if the message gets ignored or deleted it does effect ur confidence a small bit but i just say nextttt.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Same here...very rarely contact first but always happy and surprised when we do get the odd message or two!

Hi. Nice to know I am not the only one feeling good when i get messages from new people - although this is a very rare thing for lol

Hello x"

Hi and thanks for being nice to old insecure drawers here lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pedro wicked sense humour, miscarr sexy lady n upforfun82 lovely girl with cute smile xx"

Outgoing couple mrs hot n sexy and mister a nifty mover on the dance floor both very friendly xx

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By *adgaggzMan
over a year ago

N'S

I have passed on a few profiles cause I thought I'd have no chance of getting a reply but mostly my philosophy is "nothing ventured nothing gained" we're all here to have fun with some lovely like minded people, (well most of us anyway) keep trying don't be rude (unless profile tells you to be

and best of luck

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By *ymguylMan
over a year ago

ennis

I woudent rate myself a good looking guy but I will chat with people as for me a gosh ' easy to chat with and easy going is more important' I do the gym 3 times a week fit tone smooth' but that just me' keep at it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I woudent rate myself a good looking guy but I will chat with people as for me a gosh ' easy to chat with and easy going is more important' I do the gym 3 times a week fit tone smooth' but that just me' keep at it "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know what, just remember that the body doesn't always match the face! Lol! there has been people I've been introduced to at socials and I've been shocked at how 'normal' looking people are when I've thought they were like Porn stars from their fab pics. We're all real, mostly normal (lol) people behind the profiles. Take a chance, worst that can happen is no reply, but if you're not in you can't win!

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By *ymguylMan
over a year ago

ennis

yes movie stars are movie stars'

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You know what, just remember that the body doesn't always match the face! Lol! there has been people I've been introduced to at socials and I've been shocked at how 'normal' looking people are when I've thought they were like Porn stars from their fab pics. We're all real, mostly normal (lol) people behind the profiles. Take a chance, worst that can happen is no reply, but if you're not in you can't win! "

This is so true. Thank you x

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By *-ManMan
over a year ago

Kark

Hey Barney, you seem like a sound guy and able to hold a conversation, it's just your pics could be better, so why not contact a photographer who's open to taking such pics? You'd probably find one on craigs list looking for models, the pics would be free too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You're not alone OP. I'm the exact same, major confidence issues dwell here.

"
No way. You are a stunner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hey Barney, you seem like a sound guy and able to hold a conversation, it's just your pics could be better, so why not contact a photographer who's open to taking such pics? You'd probably find one on craigs list looking for models, the pics would be free too."

You offering to take some?

Or just mess about with the camera yourself! Try to take more flattering pics,it's beyond me some of the pics some people put up here!

But like GG said the body doesn't always match the face!

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By *-ManMan
over a year ago

Kark

You offering to take some?

Or just mess about with the camera yourself! Try to take more flattering pics,it's beyond me some of the pics some people put up here!

But like GG said the body doesn't always match the face!

It would be a bit of a long drive Photography is a hobby for me, id suggest a young student type, someone putting together a portfolio so it would be mutually beneficial

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Barney if you don't ask you don't get! Easier said than done I know but take some confidence from this thread. Everyone is a little shy to start with. Once you start messaging those ones that you've shied away from, you'll probably find they're lovely friendly people. Just because they're beautiful doesn't mean they're not just like you. Good luck bud and getting messaging.

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By *ohn MingoMan
over a year ago

Dublin

Just do it. I was like you when I started but swinging has helped me gain confidence in both my sex life and in real life. I have met people who i thought were out of my league.

Go for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think most of us who are from the pre-selfie era are self-conscious about how we look in photos.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think most of us who are from the pre-selfie era are self-conscious about how we look in photos.

"
I totally Agree with you

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By *ohn MingoMan
over a year ago

Dublin

"I think most of us who are from the pre-selfie era are self-conscious about how we look in photos.

I've always hated my picture taken. I am not photogenic.

My lack of matches on tinder support this claim.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the advice

I will explore this further.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Barney if you don't ask you don't get! Easier said than done I know but take some confidence from this thread. Everyone is a little shy to start with. Once you start messaging those ones that you've shied away from, you'll probably find they're lovely friendly people. Just because they're beautiful doesn't mean they're not just like you. Good luck bud and getting messaging.

Thanks my friend

This is encouraging and reassuring to me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just do it. I was like you when I started but swinging has helped me gain confidence in both my sex life and in real life. I have met people who i thought were out of my league.

Go for it."

Thanks

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I have just been told to f**k off as this thread is fuvking boring - not my misspelling!! -by some woman I have never spoken to nor can I as she now blocked me thus no right of reply. To be honest the easiest approach would have been not to message me at all and move on but definitely not reflective of the behaviour from the vast majority of Forumites.

Thank goodness so many nice people responded to, and shared, my genuine concerns.

I am by no means put off by this one 'bad egg' but goes to show that there is still a nasty minority lurking in the background hell bent on upsetting others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have just been told to f**k off as this thread is fuvking boring - not my misspelling!! -by some woman I have never spoken to nor can I as she now blocked me thus no right of reply. To be honest the easiest approach would have been not to message me at all and move on but definitely not reflective of the behaviour from the vast majority of Forumites.

Thank goodness so many nice people responded to, and shared, my genuine concerns.

I am by no means put off by this one 'bad egg' but goes to show that there is still a nasty minority lurking in the background hell bent on upsetting others. "

Ahhhh there's always one !!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank goodness so many nice people responded to, and shared, my genuine concerns.

I am by no means put off by this one 'bad egg' but goes to show that there is still a nasty minority lurking in the background hell bent on upsetting others.

Ahhhh there's always one !!!!"

Seems that way but heyho onwards and upwards eh?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank goodness so many nice people responded to, and shared, my genuine concerns.

I am by no means put off by this one 'bad egg' but goes to show that there is still a nasty minority lurking in the background hell bent on upsetting others.

Ahhhh there's always one !!!!

Seems that way but heyho onwards and upwards eh? "

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By *ohn MingoMan
over a year ago

Dublin

I doubt it was a woman.

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By *ay and DeborahCouple
over a year ago

Co. Down

"I doubt it was a woman."

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By *-ManMan
over a year ago

Kark

Thanks for the advice

I will explore this further."

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By *ohnsmithMan
over a year ago

South Tipperary

"I am a typical average guy and nothing special to look at, although I can be somewhat very witty which you cant tell from my pics.

Anywise, when I look at other public pics (guilty of pervin - your honour!) I immediately think some are way out of league so it puts me off messaging them even though I meet their preferences.

I know I have a confidence issue but was wondering if anyone else thinks the same and put off messaging others??"
keep head up.. i agree with you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Barney that's hilarious. Don't let these type of responses get you down. Enjoy them for the comedy factor! Anyone who replies like that doesn't deserve your time anyway. So just enjoy how ridiculous they sound! Lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Barney that's hilarious. Don't let these type of responses get you down. Enjoy them for the comedy factor! Anyone who replies like that doesn't deserve your time anyway. So just enjoy how ridiculous they sound! Lol"

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By *ymguylMan
over a year ago

ennis

you would think the ladies would be shy from the fab pics on fab and goes for the lsdies above me wonderful classy pictures

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