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change of personality

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Iv lived my 30 years as a happy cheerful engaging optimistic gentleman and to be honest its only got me hurt betrayed and people have tried but failed to take advantage of my good nature. I think I'll turn into an obnoxious pessimistic self reliant prick and see if that turns out any better for me. Because as far as I can see good guys come last in this world and dickheads get all the luck. This is not fab related but a General outlook on life. Opinions gratefully received

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think becoming the opposite of your goodself...obnoxious, pessimistic, a prick and other things you said will do you any favours. That's not appealing to anyone apart from a few broken types.

However, there is a grain of truth in the nice guys finish last thing.

Depends on if you are being nice by nature or to unduly please others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Iv lived my 30 years as a happy cheerful engaging optimistic gentleman and to be honest its only got me hurt betrayed and people have tried but failed to take advantage of my good nature. I think I'll turn into an obnoxious pessimistic self reliant prick and see if that turns out any better for me. Because as far as I can see good guys come last in this world and dickheads get all the luck. This is not fab related but a General outlook on life. Opinions gratefully received"

And you will hate the person you become

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Iv lived my 30 years as a happy cheerful engaging optimistic gentleman and to be honest its only got me hurt betrayed and people have tried but failed to take advantage of my good nature. I think I'll turn into an obnoxious pessimistic self reliant prick and see if that turns out any better for me. Because as far as I can see good guys come last in this world and dickheads get all the luck. This is not fab related but a General outlook on life. Opinions gratefully received"

You hit the nail right on the head there saying that but don't change who you are because of them in the end you will shine over them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well self reliance is a good trait to have so go with that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on what your trying to win??? I get told I'm too nice all the time but I'd rather be me it's my nature and the way I was brought up.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

By nature I'm a nice guy. I don't want to ever hurt or upset people. A lot come to me with their issues and problems. I see people who look after number 1 endlessly get ahead by luck or design I don't know which , but I it angers me the way genuine caring people of both sexes get taken for granted used and abused. It's not in my being to see anything other than the good in people but I'm beginning to think this may eventually be my downfall. So ultimately is it more opportunistic to be liked or feared?

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By *isdirtygirlWoman
over a year ago

Dublin


"By nature I'm a nice guy. I don't want to ever hurt or upset people. A lot come to me with their issues and problems. I see people who look after number 1 endlessly get ahead by luck or design I don't know which , but I it angers me the way genuine caring people of both sexes get taken for granted used and abused. It's not in my being to see anything other than the good in people but I'm beginning to think this may eventually be my downfall. So ultimately is it more opportunistic to be liked or feared?"

Id rather like you than loathe you, if youre a nice guy why change who you are? Why alter your values or morals? Ultimately good things happen to good people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What do you think?

Does someone prefer a nice partner they love or an abusive partner they fear?

I think the devil is probably in the detail in terms of assertiveness, confidence or being seen as a soft touch maybe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You will only make yourself more pissed off trying to be something your not, let your inner bitch out on thise who deserve it n keep your self respect hun, good things happen in different ways x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never change your personality for anyone be happy in ur own heart and mind and be true to urself and create ur own perfection ,cut out all negative people for anyone who as been nasty to yea well karma a bitch.

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By *-4pleasureCouple
over a year ago

Belfast


"Iv lived my 30 years as a happy cheerful engaging optimistic gentleman and to be honest its only got me hurt betrayed and people have tried but failed to take advantage of my good nature. I think I'll turn into an obnoxious pessimistic self reliant prick and see if that turns out any better for me. Because as far as I can see good guys come last in this world and dickheads get all the luck. This is not fab related but a General outlook on life. Opinions gratefully received"

Its impossible to change your personality - it is intrinsic to who you are.

The problem is when you look at others and assume that their more aggressive / self absorbed personality is more successful than your own.

This is,and can only be, an assumption. You cannot know what demons they face daily nor what drove them to act in such a way. They may very well envy you for your compassionate personality.

Embrace who you are - energy spent envying others or thinking negatively is wasted energy.

Learn to love yourself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As the song goes don't go changing to try and please me.I love u just the way u are .....

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By *oughandCurvyCouple
over a year ago

galway

You don't sounds so happy and cheerful as you describe?

Don't they say that people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones? It's easy to judge those around you and even at times envy their situations but the truth is you never know what's really going on in someone else's life so you need to be less concerned about others and do what makes you happy, learn to love yourself for who you are!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Iv lived my 30 years as a happy cheerful engaging optimistic gentleman and to be honest its only got me hurt betrayed and people have tried but failed to take advantage of my good nature. I think I'll turn into an obnoxious pessimistic self reliant prick and see if that turns out any better for me. Because as far as I can see good guys come last in this world and dickheads get all the luck. This is not fab related but a General outlook on life. Opinions gratefully received"

Aww some lady break your heart...change for no one,you are who ya are...

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By *etmebeurfantasyWoman
over a year ago

My town

Why would anyone want to change there own personality to suit others. We are all unique....

If people don't like you for what you are say.

Suck it up buttercup...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've seen those ruthless guys over the years and while they may got ahead in the job etc but they're hated and have few friends.

You need to think long term. I'm sure if you're ever in need of help lots of people will be happy to give it to you. Probably prople you never expect. But they know you're a good person and will be there for you. Not many will be arsed helping the asshole.

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By *hristian GingerMan
over a year ago

Th'on place over yonder

As with everything in life, moderation is key - be the nice guy you are but don't neglect the asshole in you either - both are useful and called for but only at the right time, using either out of that right timeframe or situation will enevitably lead to unwanted outcomes, if you get what I mean

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice guys finish last.... Which is probably a good thing here...

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By *shoreMan
over a year ago

cork

Travel the road less traveled for yourself.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Iv lived my 30 years as a happy cheerful engaging optimistic gentleman and to be honest its only got me hurt betrayed and people have tried but failed to take advantage of my good nature. I think I'll turn into an obnoxious pessimistic self reliant prick and see if that turns out any better for me. Because as far as I can see good guys come last in this world and dickheads get all the luck."

Seems like that sometimes- but greedy dickheads are seldom happy - and that's why they are greedy dickheads. Chances are, you won't be able to change much at your age so just accept your personality and see the good in instead. Be happier that you're NOT a dickhead.

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