FabSwingers.com forum: Discretion

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Where are the limits of what you can say on the forum about your experiences?

Verifications usually tell who you played with, so that is already semi publicly open for a view. They sometimes give little more insight as well.

I do say sometimes little things about myself (lake swim, things left in a hotel...haha). I am trying to be careful and not to mention details of the play in forums or chats (someone mentioned this to me recently that forums are accessible from outside of the site).

The longer I am here, the more I am learning, which is good, as the subject is a very important one.

What are your limits and what would you consider to be an indiscretion?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally what happens on a meet should stay on a meet.

Discretion for me is if we played and you see me in public in company.....keep walking.....text me hello later!

And if you are going to gossip or judge me make sure your prefect yourself!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Discretion to me is not sharing details of meets...

Not sharing your face pic with other members...

Comparing you with other ladys from here looks wise...

Not Telling other members where you live or work...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Discretion to me is not sharing details of meets...

Not sharing your face pic with other members...

Comparing you with other ladys from here looks wise...

Not Telling other members where you live or work...

For me no one I meet here would know where I live or where I work, that's leaving yourself wide open, but then I don't trust easily.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Personally what happens on a meet should stay on a meet.

Discretion for me is if we played and you see me in public in company.....keep walking.....text me hello later!

And if you are going to gossip or judge me make sure your prefect yourself!!"

Totally agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Discretion to me is not sharing details of meets...

Not sharing your face pic with other members...

Comparing you with other ladys from here looks wise...

Not Telling other members where you live or work...

For me no one I meet here would know where I live or where I work, that's leaving yourself wide open, but then I don't trust easily."
i didnt tell anything they sent my face pic to somebody that knew me and found out where i work and live...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Discretion to me is not sharing details of meets...

Not sharing your face pic with other members...

Comparing you with other ladys from here looks wise...

Not Telling other members where you live or work...

For me no one I meet here would know where I live or where I work, that's leaving yourself wide open, but then I don't trust easily. i didnt tell anything they sent my face pic to somebody that knew me and found out where i work and live..."

Jebus that's not cool

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Discretion to me is not sharing details of meets...

Not sharing your face pic with other members...

Comparing you with other ladys from here looks wise...

Not Telling other members where you live or work...

Were they a verified user?

I do not send face photos to non verified users at all on this and other sites. The longer I am here the more I understand that even verified users can be unpleasant.

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By *imwildWoman
over a year ago

around

I think if your going to write about an incident ,funny or not, that happened on a meet then the other party involved should be willing to, and agree to, it being shared with everyone.

And wrote in a way that is not 'naming and shaming'

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By *ardtofindMan
over a year ago

galway

"Discretion to me is not sharing details of meets...

Not sharing your face pic with other members...

Comparing you with other ladys from here looks wise...

Not Telling other members where you live or work...

"
Couldn't agree more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't disclose anything about a meet (person or event) on forums or to anybody else, that just isn't cricket. I expect the same in return.

Though if there's a funniest thing to happen on a meet thread and I have an anecdote that was funny as hell and I know the other party doesn't mind me telling I will. Obviously I name no names.

For instance I nce got hit round the head with a black dildo on a meet....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Discretion to me is not sharing details of meets...

Not sharing your face pic with other members...

Comparing you with other ladys from here looks wise...

Not Telling other members where you live or work...

Were they a verified user?

I do not send face photos to non verified users at all on this and other sites. The longer I am here the more I understand that even verified users can be unpleasant.

Verified by a few people... paid member also

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Discretion to me is not sharing details of meets...

Not sharing your face pic with other members...

Comparing you with other ladys from here looks wise...

Not Telling other members where you live or work...

Were they a verified user?

I do not send face photos to non verified users at all on this and other sites. The longer I am here the more I understand that even verified users can be unpleasant.

Verified by a few people... paid member also

This is why I trust no one .

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Discretion to me is not sharing details of meets...

Not sharing your face pic with other members...

Comparing you with other ladys from here looks wise...

Not Telling other members where you live or work...

Were they a verified user?

I do not send face photos to non verified users at all on this and other sites. The longer I am here the more I understand that even verified users can be unpleasant.

Verified by a few people... paid member also

This is why I trust no one ."

So far I received few unpleasant emails from single guys and recently from verified and establish couple. I guess, that is why m&g meetings are so important, as you can actually have a chat with people (i am coming to next one with a notebook and a pen... as I didn't remember any nicknames from the last one... Which is a pity as I spoke with few nice people

). I also look now more carefully at the verifications, to see if I know the people that provided them. I know I am a single guy, but I am very careful about selecting the people I would like to meet with and will not go to a play with everybody (there are so many factors to be considered, mutual attraction, respect, fantasy, understanding of expectations, etc...).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Discretion is protecting your own privacy and your playing friends.

I never ever send or keep face photos on the site. Txt is fine. That's my only deal breaker. Some couples (only some) believe they hold some sort of bargaining power or right to demand whatever they feel like. This is not the case. That is an example of a lack of discretion on their part.

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By *ickirishallsortsMan
over a year ago

Lickie Manor

Loose lips sink ships....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tend to avoid people who are very vocal about there meets and experiences on this site. Sadly there are people who can't hold there piss when it comes to meets and what their doing. In my experience it's men who seem to be the worst. I know it's just bravado.

Pic sharing I know is an ongoing problem and it's been made easier for them to do with screen shots. One guy told me he saves every photo he's sent so he knows and remembers who's who. Very annoying but that's what your up against.

Those that have status updates of "had a great 3some last night" etc is just bragging and I find it very off putting as I'm looking for discreet playmates.

People use the site how they want and are well entitled to write whatever status or forum posts they want. I personally find it a little off putting but that's just me.

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By *imwildWoman
over a year ago

around

Not just you tiny. I feel the exact same way. I cringe when I see those status'.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I tend to avoid people who are very vocal about there meets and experiences on this site. Sadly there are people who can't hold there piss when it comes to meets and what their doing. In my experience it's men who seem to be the worst. I know it's just bravado.

Those that have status updates of "had a great 3some last night" etc is just bragging and I find it very off putting as I'm looking for discreet playmates.

People use the site how they want and are well entitled to write whatever status or forum posts they want. I personally find it a little off putting but that's just me.

I was once offered by another guy to exchange photos of girl I met with. That profile got reported. I would not agree to sharing photos I got on the site as I first of all delete them and second of all it would have been a huge privacy invasion. I actually do not expect to receive face photo, I only ask for a body shoot, like the ones I have on my profile. It is great that you can put comments on profiles here, so if you found mutual attraction, you can actually write this in the comment section, without keeping the photos as a reminder.

I get your point about the status updates. I am guilty myself of putting similar comment before, due to the huge excitement of actually fulfilling that long waited for realisation and a big fantasy of mine (again, not people from this site). Right now, I am more careful about my status updates.

I am glad I raised those questions here as these comments are really great and will definitely help many people to avoid mistakes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Discretion to me means no graphic verifications, not calling people by their name on the forum (or even by an initial) or in a veri if that name has not been given publicly on their profile. It also means not discussing other members with anyone, and not being overly familiar with people, especially if your only contact is on here, and they're not interested in taking it further. People who follow others around the forum making comments at them, when it's clear to everyone that the other person isn't interested is another thing that goes on my list of indiscretions.

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By *ecretly seductiveWoman
over a year ago

Palookaville

"I wouldn't disclose anything about a meet (person or event) on forums or to anybody else, that just isn't cricket. I expect the same in return.

Though if there's a funniest thing to happen on a meet thread and I have an anecdote that was funny as hell and I know the other party doesn't mind me telling I will. Obviously I name no names.

For instance I nce got hit round the head with a black dildo on a meet....

Couldn't agree more banabas....

Now I have heard that story. . But my lips are sealed lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone wants discretion then you say nothing about them.

If a lot of time has passed and finding out who the meet was is impossible and you have an anecdote that is amusing or helps a new person understand something then go for it.

okay - I used to meet a couple and they wanted discretion but didnt mind me telling others on the forum

not okay - I used to meet jack and jill from cork and the things they are into would curl your toes. He held me down while she fucked me up the ass with a strapon. They live in the kilbride area if you know it..

Its a bit obvious isnt it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wouldn't disclose anything about a meet (person or event) on forums or to anybody else, that just isn't cricket. I expect the same in return.

Though if there's a funniest thing to happen on a meet thread and I have an anecdote that was funny as hell and I know the other party doesn't mind me telling I will. Obviously I name no names.

For instance I nce got hit round the head with a black dildo on a meet....

Oooo clever you grabbing it from the abuser and stuffing it down ur pants!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Its a bit obvious isnt it."

I wouldn't necessary agree that it is so obvious. The issue is much more complex as you can appreciate from the above posts. From what I take, even if you and the person/people you played with are ok with you saying a little, the others will/might judge you for even saying that you had a meet that day and they will/might assume you are indiscrete. Or they will find any other reason to hold it against you, especially if you are a single man. It's people's right to do so. These people invite us to share their privacy and intimate moments, so obviously they want to make sure it is done safely. That also works in the other way. We also have our insecurities, privacy concerns and do not want to be compared against other men, etc.

It is impossible to please everyone and I think the golden centre is to say as much as you are happy with other people knowing about yourself and keep whatever is related to others to an absolute minimum (those that told me about their fantasies or gave me other discrete info has never found the slightest hint of that in forums and that is discretion to me).

Some people are very concerned about the fact that forum can be read by non users and the slightest info would get out of here and made it to the public. We all should respect that.

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By *SinfullyCuriousCouple
over a year ago

Co Antrim, N. Ireland

Discretion for us is paramount. We don't share face pics or show face on cam as we have been made aware they are made available on other sites.

we don't discuss our personal life at all at meets. We dont discuss the nature of our meets to others or via verifications. If we think a vetified meet gives TMI we won't post it.

Also believe that discretion is important not just for meets but on cam. I blocked a guy for discussing a cam session in an open chatroom after it had taken place. He was hopeful for a meet but if he cant be discrete online we arent ever going to meet him.

the list could go on...

Mrs Sin xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

First rule of Fab "Never talk about Fab"......... second rule anyone??

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By *SinfullyCuriousCouple
over a year ago

Co Antrim, N. Ireland

"First rule of Fab "Never talk about Fab"......... second rule anyone??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No pillow talk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wouldn't disclose anything about a meet (person or event) on forums or to anybody else, that just isn't cricket. I expect the same in return.

Though if there's a funniest thing to happen on a meet thread and I have an anecdote that was funny as hell and I know the other party doesn't mind me telling I will. Obviously I name no names.

For instance I nce got hit round the head with a black dildo on a meet....

Oooo clever you grabbing it from the abuser and stuffing it down ur pants!!

Slander

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No pillow talk.

haha

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By *ecretly seductiveWoman
over a year ago

Palookaville

"First rule of Fab "Never talk about Fab"......... second rule anyone??

errmmm never talk about fab....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"First rule of Fab "Never talk about Fab"......... second rule anyone??

errmmm never talk about fab....

Nope - charm mrs _ecretly seductive

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