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"Having a girl with a tattoo on the back of her neck is much like having a bathroom with a magazine in it - It gives you something to read while you're in the shitter That's so filty i love it. Haha. Top marks. " | |||
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"What's the difference between love, true love and showing off? Spitting, swallowing and gargling." Haha filty. But what one is showing off and true love. | |||
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"Anybody got good jokes? " why are men like cement? cos when they get laid they takes ages to go hard | |||
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"Anybody got good jokes? why are men like cement? cos when they get laid they takes ages to go hard " hahaha | |||
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"What's the difference between being hungry and horny? Where you put the cucumber." u wudnt fit a cucumber up mine so better for me to be hungry | |||
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"What's the difference between being hungry and horny? Where you put the cucumber. u wudnt fit a cucumber up mine so better for me to be hungry " makes notes | |||
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"What's the difference between being hungry and horny? Where you put the cucumber. u wudnt fit a cucumber up mine so better for me to be hungry " haha I don't like cucumber so I'm fucked haha | |||
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"What's the difference between being hungry and horny? Where you put the cucumber. u wudnt fit a cucumber up mine so better for me to be hungry haha I don't like cucumber so I'm fucked haha " u cud always try a courgette | |||
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"Husband and wife playing golf. On the 2nd tee he turns to her and says he has a confession to make - he had an affair but it was over now. She brooded over this for a few more holes and eventually turned to him and said she forgave him. When they got to the 17th tee she turned to him and said as he had confessed to her she also had a confession. She said that 30 years ago, before she had met him, she was a man. At that he lost the head, swearing and shouting at her and throwing his clubs to the ground. Barely able to speak he said...this is unforgivable......all these years you have been deceiving me... cheating even........playing off the Ladies tee. " | |||
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"Eating pussy is like driving in the snow, If you don't slow down and pay attention, you could slide into the arsehole in front of you." haha thts a gud one | |||
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"Man walks into a bar and sees big sign Ham sandwich €5 Handjob. €10 Blowjob. €20 So he calls over the sexy barmaid, leans forward and whispers in her ear " are you the sexy lady who does the handjobs?" To which the lady replies "yes thats me" Man leans closer to barmaid and whispers softly into her ear "Go wash your hands and make me a ham sandwich!!"" | |||
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"A middle-aged woman looks in the mirror. "God, I look old, fat and ugly," she says to her hubby. "Pay me a compliment, dear." Her hubby says, "Your fucking eyesight's good!"" still not as good as Cinderella. Haha | |||
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"A middle-aged woman looks in the mirror. "God, I look old, fat and ugly," she says to her hubby. "Pay me a compliment, dear." Her hubby says, "Your fucking eyesight's good!" still not as good as Cinderella. Haha" haha FFS gimmie a while ha | |||
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"A middle-aged woman looks in the mirror. "God, I look old, fat and ugly," she says to her hubby. "Pay me a compliment, dear." Her hubby says, "Your fucking eyesight's good!" still not as good as Cinderella. Haha haha FFS gimmie a while ha " Haha ok but that's normally my line " hang on give me a min i can sort this" * door slams shut* Bahaha | |||
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"Two sperms are having a race. One sperm says, "Fuck me all this swimming is knackering me, how long till we reach the womb?" The second sperm says, "Fucking long way to go yet mate - we've only just gone past her tonsils!"" Haha i saw that on a birthday card. my bro got it for my MA of all Fucking ppl. was pmsl. | |||
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"I could tell you a few but im not allowed to name and shame " Ah go on ya tease | |||
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