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By *ollisucker OP   Woman
19 weeks ago

mayo

Seems to be alot of people on here who were once married, I want to know what is the biggest lesson you learnt from being married. Perhaps it's was a sexual awakening, perhaps it was something that caused your marriage to end. Feel free to share her or private dm

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By *ipstick KissesWoman
19 weeks ago

Newry

My biggest lessons were the importance of open and honest communication, and that work isn't everything

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By *otownkid1967Man
19 weeks ago

Portlaoise

My awakening came after my marriage was over. Thought I had a normal sex life when married. But only got really going after I divorced.

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By *uietcontrolMan
19 weeks ago

city

Same as motown, had no idea what was out there until after the divorce. Looking back on the relationship itself i would say don't ignore red flags just because you can't admit to yourself that you could be wrong.

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By *ightower2021Man
19 weeks ago

donegal

[Removed by poster at 24/01/26 12:42:49]

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By (user no longer on site)
19 weeks ago

I have learnt that desire and romantic love may fade but kindness and altruistic love can endure even after separation in my case. Always be an adult and leave the inner child behind and you will be sound!

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By *ilkennyguy1Man
19 weeks ago

Kilkenny

Agreed getting harder to get that work life balance. Everything gone so expensive. Need to do the work to pay for it all .

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By (user no longer on site)
19 weeks ago


"My awakening came after my marriage was over. Thought I had a normal sex life when married. But only got really going after I divorced."

This 💯

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By *r.CuddlesMan
19 weeks ago

Cuddleton ;-)

To me marriage is nothing but a fools game easily one the most expensive mistakes to ever make I certainly don't need a piece of paper to prove myself to anyone

Granted some marriages lasts a lifetime and fair play to them for that but in most cases they end in tears and a massive dent in your wallets

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By *ollisucker OP   Woman
18 weeks ago

mayo

Some very interesting thoughts here, biggest cause of break ups seems to be communicating

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By *aseylee324Couple
18 weeks ago

Valley of Squinting Windows

That you should pay closer attention to people's actions than what they tell you

Love is an action not a feeling

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By *ishInAPondMan
18 weeks ago

Cork city

[Removed by poster at 25/01/26 12:39:05]

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By (user no longer on site)
18 weeks ago

The biggest lesson I learned from being married was that there are lots of things you need to discuss before you have children. Different opinions on life, different perspectives on values, and different amounts of unchecked trauma can lead to a very difficult marriage, and probably why most marriages break up.

Everybody says they want the best for their kids, but some people use them as a weapon or as a crutch to prop up their miserable lives.

Beware of the little signs and don't ignore them.

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By *r GadgetMan
18 weeks ago

centre


"The biggest lesson I learned from being married was that there are lots of things you need to discuss before you have children. Different opinions on life, different perspectives on values, and different amounts of unchecked trauma can lead to a very difficult marriage, and probably why most marriages break up.

Everybody says they want the best for their kids, but some people use them as a weapon or as a crutch to prop up their miserable lives.

Beware of the little signs and don't ignore them."

I agree, my ex was always complaining about her mother and how much she disliked her but she was a carbon copy of her mum. Always miserable and negative, constant drama. Cared more about what others thought about her than the people who actually cared. I was close to buying the ring but her need for attention and praise lead to her cheating, I ignored it for a while but it ate away at me. Worse thing I could have done, if something doesn't feel right it's because it's not, trust your gut

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By *ild WomanWoman
18 weeks ago

carlow

Lots of little things add up slowly before you see the real picture. For some it's to late for change or there is no opportunity to get away.

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By (user no longer on site)
18 weeks ago


"The biggest lesson I learned from being married was that there are lots of things you need to discuss before you have children. Different opinions on life, different perspectives on values, and different amounts of unchecked trauma can lead to a very difficult marriage, and probably why most marriages break up.

Everybody says they want the best for their kids, but some people use them as a weapon or as a crutch to prop up their miserable lives.

Beware of the little signs and don't ignore them.

I agree, my ex was always complaining about her mother and how much she disliked her but she was a carbon copy of her mum. Always miserable and negative, constant drama. Cared more about what others thought about her than the people who actually cared. I was close to buying the ring but her need for attention and praise lead to her cheating, I ignored it for a while but it ate away at me. Worse thing I could have done, if something doesn't feel right it's because it's not, trust your gut"

Sorry to hear about that, cheating the worst ( and yes I am aware of the irony of saying that on a swinging site , you dont need to point that out)

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By (user no longer on site)
18 weeks ago

Lol

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By *ddiesayshello2Man
18 weeks ago

dundalk , Monaghan,meath

Oh sex and intimacy completely disappear unfortunately, menopause absolutely killed it

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By *adger BrocMan
18 weeks ago

North Cork

In my experience marriage is a marathon not a sprint. You may hit "the wall" at some stage but it is certainly possible to continue if you are prepared to put in the effort.

Everyone is an individual so it is unlikely that total compatibility can ever be achieved between any two people on every aspect of their life together. So compromise is key unless it was a total mismatch from the beginning or there is some element of abuse involved.

Sexual activity probably consists of less than 0.5% of the overall time spent in most marriages so it may not be the most important factor in a happy marriage.

"Love covers a multitude of sins"

"Resilience can conquer every adversity".

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By *ofusplusCouple
18 weeks ago

Limerick


"Sorry to hear about that, cheating the worst ( and yes I am aware of the irony of saying that on a swinging site , you dont need to point that out) "

Many swinging couples would agree with you. Swinging and morals absolutely go hand-in-hand. Why do you fee there's irony in what you say? Mrs

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By *otownkid1967Man
18 weeks ago

Portlaoise

As I said earlier in thread,my awakening came after divorce. I sometimes wonder what would have happened if we had discovered swinging. Anyone else think along those lines??

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By *aseylee324Couple
18 weeks ago

Valley of Squinting Windows


"As I said earlier in thread,my awakening came after divorce. I sometimes wonder what would have happened if we had discovered swinging. Anyone else think along those lines??"

No, we discussed it, it wouldn't have worked

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By *ursecretmischiefCouple
18 weeks ago

Westmeath The West.


"As I said earlier in thread,my awakening came after divorce. I sometimes wonder what would have happened if we had discovered swinging. Anyone else think along those lines??

No, we discussed it, it wouldn't have worked "

It's like couples in a struggling relationship thinking a baby will bring them closer together!

Swinging for couples is not for the faint hearted!! 😂

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By *aseylee324Couple
18 weeks ago

Valley of Squinting Windows


"As I said earlier in thread,my awakening came after divorce. I sometimes wonder what would have happened if we had discovered swinging. Anyone else think along those lines??

No, we discussed it, it wouldn't have worked

It's like couples in a struggling relationship thinking a baby will bring them closer together!

Swinging for couples is not for the faint hearted!! 😂"

100%!!!

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By *elle111Woman
18 weeks ago

NI

Grass is not always greener but a marriage takes effort from both parties and don’t ever take it for granted

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By *ollisucker OP   Woman
18 weeks ago

mayo


"Grass is not always greener but a marriage takes effort from both parties and don’t ever take it for granted "

That's pretty much spot on, crazy how many couples don't realise this

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