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"January 2024 I was sitting on a lot of cash but living in the same house as my ex wife and I was a sad lonely non confident shell of a man. January 2025 I was sitting on very little cash sitting in a rented house and a happy confident man with things to look forward to. What I’m trying to say some people might have a lot of money but don’t fell happy. " I totally get that & as they say 'money cant buy you happiness or your health'. I can speak first hand about both of those aspects of life. | |||
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"The happiest people in the world don’t have the best of things, they make the best of things….." I genuinely agree with that statement. But when you are facing being homeless with 2 teenagers, you view things differently. | |||
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" Things come in swings and roundabouts. . " Swings & roundabouts is right. I'm heavily reliant of things going my way in thr coming year or 2. I should be out enjoying my life and giving my kids what they deserve. This has not been the case for a long while now. | |||
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"I kind of hate the "money doesn't buy happiness" lines. I feels it belittles the stress and struggle of not having enough." This. Being lucky enough not to have to stress about it now, I'll say that if it can't buy happiness outright, it sure helps a lot... | |||
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"I kind of hate the "money doesn't buy happiness" lines. I feels it belittles the stress and struggle of not having enough." It does and it doesnt. Sure having more money would stop my worry. But would it just present new worries? I dont think it would in my circumstance. I will gladly take my chances 😅 | |||
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" Things come in swings and roundabouts. . Swings & roundabouts is right. I'm heavily reliant of things going my way in thr coming year or 2. I should be out enjoying my life and giving my kids what they deserve. This has not been the case for a long while now. " Life can be hard at times. You give your kids a roof over their heads and all the love you can give. Some people don't give anything. As a parent , I tried to give my kids what I could . Money was tight and I made sacrifices for them. Which I would do again. Maybe at present your kids aren't aware of your situation because of their age or other reasons. I can't offer a solution but I do empathise with you. A lot of others are in same boat. Keep a positive outlook. Maybe a visit to citizens advice or maybe might help. ![]() ![]() | |||
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"I dont mean to sound too cliché but if you have you health and your happy money cant buy that. A roof over your head and good friends is far more important that a fancy car or loads of cash. " I dont have my health nor a roof for myself and my kids. Double disaster 😢 | |||
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"The best bit of advice I ever received- "Where you are right now is a direct result of decisions you have made. Where you will be in 5/10 years time will be a direct result of decisions you will make. Make the right decisions" I took this advice to heart. Left my stressful 60hr/week job. Became my own boss, love my job, more time for hobbies. I'm not rolling in cash, but now I am not drowning in bills. I'm happy and that's all that matters" That’s a great piece of advice. | |||
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"The best bit of advice I ever received- "Where you are right now is a direct result of decisions you have made. Where you will be in 5/10 years time will be a direct result of decisions you will make. Make the right decisions" I took this advice to heart. Left my stressful 60hr/week job. Became my own boss, love my job, more time for hobbies. I'm not rolling in cash, but now I am not drowning in bills. I'm happy and that's all that matters" Brave decision. Glad it has been a positive move for you x | |||
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"Very off topic....soz ![]() Absolutely. My brother is only a couple of years older than me but got his foot in the door in his trade during a boom. He also got a really good deal on a house which needed exactly the kind of work he was able to do himself. I see his position as mainly being due to sheer luck, he sees it as being nothing but the result of hard graft. The truth is almost certainly somewhere in between lol. Due to a lot of circumstances outside of my control I haven't got two pennies to rub together but I'm happier than I've ever been. He is very financially secure and seems absolutely miserable. | |||
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"It really does depend on a fluke of what year you were born I'd imagine most people my age got married early 20's and bought their first house at the same time with 25 year tracker mortgages that are paid off When we moved to our second home after a few years the first home sold for 3 times what we paid for it... I didn't earn it but I'm not the only one that did it " Yip I bought my house right at the bottom of the crash. Pure fluke, no market predictions or holding off as prices fell, just literally when I was in the position to buy the market bottomed out. | |||
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"I haven't a pot but I've many things in my life that no money would buy and for that I'm very grateful every single day. I hope life gives you the break you so clearly need. Sending you positive healing vibes ❣️" Thank you ❤️ | |||
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"Thanks for all the replies ❤️ I'm feeling very sorry for myself so far this week: in pain all the time, huge money worries, dealing with an enormous amount of crap from my ex. Having my wobble today. Back at it tomorrow 🤪😅 " Would you not retrain in something that'll be fruitful in a few years. I know two people who retrained and are earning 70k sterling and the other 75k euros. Software engineer and cyber security. You can now learn on your own in the house through the Internet. | |||
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"Thanks for all the replies ❤️ I'm feeling very sorry for myself so far this week: in pain all the time, huge money worries, dealing with an enormous amount of crap from my ex. Having my wobble today. Back at it tomorrow 🤪😅 Would you not retrain in something that'll be fruitful in a few years. I know two people who retrained and are earning 70k sterling and the other 75k euros. Software engineer and cyber security. You can now learn on your own in the house through the Internet." I would love to retrain but I have an incurable cancer which means I cant work. I am technically still employed & cant really take early retirement eithet. I've looked at all my options. | |||
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"You gotta count your blessings, sure having loads of money sounds nice, but maybe you have stuff in your life that you can't put a price on : freedom, health, independance etc..." This is true. I am free of my controlling ex. And I count my blessings I am. | |||
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"January 2024 I was sitting on a lot of cash but living in the same house as my ex wife and I was a sad lonely non confident shell of a man. January 2025 I was sitting on very little cash sitting in a rented house and a happy confident man with things to look forward to. What I’m trying to say some people might have a lot of money but don’t fell happy. " Very well put | |||
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"Very off topic....soz ![]() It's worth remembering many people live beyond their means, financed up to the eyeballs and living off credit cards. | |||
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"You are all not going to believe what I realised today: I could have been claiming an extra 128euro a week for my 2 kids as part of a SW payment I get. So I have missed out on over 20,000 euro....I kid you not 🤦♀️😭😭🤦♀️🤦♀️😭😭😭🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️ I understand your annoyance, but please start thinking of the glass half full and get in that application pronto! All the information is out there, up to us to find it... difficult that is though I know. It cant be backdated either. I am raging 🤬🤬🤬" | |||
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"It's very difficult to struggle financially. But I wouldn't spend time comparing myself to others. I've had times when I couldn't afford holidays so we went with our tent and picnic, I try to manage my money very carefully. I have 3 kids and no mortgage but I've worked very hard to be where I am now and will continue to do so. Are your kids at the age where they can start to get a part time job? Are you providing for the kids alone or does their father help. My ex husband pays monthly so that helps to cover school costs etc. " Kids are 15 & 16. 0 interest in getting a summer job and helping me out. Their dad is a joke: gives me 200e a month for both kids while he is off buying apartments in Spain and earning 6 figures. He doesnt give a toss about his kids, only in having a dig at me. | |||
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"It's very difficult to struggle financially. But I wouldn't spend time comparing myself to others. I've had times when I couldn't afford holidays so we went with our tent and picnic, I try to manage my money very carefully. I have 3 kids and no mortgage but I've worked very hard to be where I am now and will continue to do so. Are your kids at the age where they can start to get a part time job? Are you providing for the kids alone or does their father help. My ex husband pays monthly so that helps to cover school costs etc. Kids are 15 & 16. 0 interest in getting a summer job and helping me out. Their dad is a joke: gives me 200e a month for both kids while he is off buying apartments in Spain and earning 6 figures. He doesnt give a toss about his kids, only in having a dig at me. " With the greatest of respects to you, we chatted before and you said you were going to get divorced or were divorced, either way, you can go to court and fill out a form for maintenance. No judge will allow the father of the children to provide €200 a month. I’ve seen people in courts who are on social welfare and the judge is making orders of €100 minimum and more a week. They go on €50 a child a week at the minimum, so I’d be heading to the courthouse Tuesday morning and asking them for some help in filling out the form. That is a slow process but it will be a start to helping out. If he doesn’t turn up, the judge will rule in absence of him and then you can seek a declaration from his wages. | |||
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" Having my wobble today. Back at it tomorrow 🤪😅 " most of us have wobbles I’ve been widowed and gave all inheritance to my son then I remarried lived a great life with a gorgeous home although I worked hard for it and after 13 years we split. I’m now over 50 in a little pickle house paying to raise a teenager whilst dad is living a nice life and contributes an embarrassing amount, I’m mortgaged to the hilt until I’m 65 whilst son has started life mortgage free and I’m struggling more than ever on only my salary but I’m not willing to get into another relationship just to ease that burden, we will all get there eventually. Feck it try to find the joy in every day even if it’s having a bottle of £6 wine on a Saturday night in ur kitchen with ur ironing board out put music on and dance like no one’s watching. Some people sail through and some struggle but the circle continues and u should be proud of getting up every day and getting on. All will come good. | |||
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"It's very difficult to struggle financially. But I wouldn't spend time comparing myself to others. I've had times when I couldn't afford holidays so we went with our tent and picnic, I try to manage my money very carefully. I have 3 kids and no mortgage but I've worked very hard to be where I am now and will continue to do so. Are your kids at the age where they can start to get a part time job? Are you providing for the kids alone or does their father help. My ex husband pays monthly so that helps to cover school costs etc. Kids are 15 & 16. 0 interest in getting a summer job and helping me out. Their dad is a joke: gives me 200e a month for both kids while he is off buying apartments in Spain and earning 6 figures. He doesnt give a toss about his kids, only in having a dig at me. " I can only recommend that you get a solicitor and go to court for maintenence payments. Maybe I was lucky but my arrangement is significantly more money than you've quoted here. 3 kids, we both earn the same income. I'd say no judge would allow 23 euro a week for a child, no way. I completed an affadavit of means and affidavit of welfare. Its a bit of work but well worth it. Best of luck. | |||
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"Thanks for all the replies ❤️ I'm feeling very sorry for myself so far this week: in pain all the time, huge money worries, dealing with an enormous amount of crap from my ex. Having my wobble today. Back at it tomorrow 🤪😅 Would you not retrain in something that'll be fruitful in a few years. I know two people who retrained and are earning 70k sterling and the other 75k euros. Software engineer and cyber security. You can now learn on your own in the house through the Internet. I would love to retrain but I have an incurable cancer which means I cant work. I am technically still employed & cant really take early retirement eithet. I've looked at all my options. " I’m truly sorry to read about your cancer. Whilst my cancer wasn’t incurable 4.5 years ago I found out I had stage 3 cancer, within 2 weeks I found out my ex husband was wasn’t the man I though and I left him, I had just changed job in the same month and I had a 4 year old and a 6 year old. It was a frickin tough time. I kept waiting to be rescued until one day I realised no one was coming and I had to get out of the darkness myself. I can’t tell you there will be a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but there is lots of help and support out there and I still use it to this day. Ignore your ex, block him for a while if you have to. Talks to MABS for financial advice and the Irish cancer society and see what they can help you with. Best of luck x | |||
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"I dont mean to sound too cliché but if you have you health and your happy money cant buy that. A roof over your head and good friends is far more important that a fancy car or loads of cash. I dont have my health nor a roof for myself and my kids. Double disaster 😢" please god your situation changes for the better on both counts a lot are struggling at the moment ive struggled all my life i was ill last year but thankfully im out the good side of it now back working crazy hours but it keeps me going i really hope everything will work out for you and family x ![]() | |||
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"Thanks for all the replies ❤️ I'm feeling very sorry for myself so far this week: in pain all the time, huge money worries, dealing with an enormous amount of crap from my ex. Having my wobble today. Back at it tomorrow 🤪😅 Hope you are receiving any government help available, alot of information can be hidden so a visit to Social Welfare or Citizen Rights Office may be able to see if you are entitled to some help. I totally understand your frustration and hope things turn around for you xxx " | |||
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"Very off topic....soz ![]() just be yourself dont be worrying about what might not happen every day is a new day you might get your answers from here but its time for you stop and think whats around you never mind about whos spending what everything will come right in its own time. ![]() | |||
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