FabSwingers.com forum: Meeting as a couple for first time/ hotels home

By *eena500 OP Couple
19 weeks ago

Dublin

We started chatting with someone and within hrs they asked us to meet for play at their home.

They might be very nice people. Not raising fingers on them at all.

But as a newbie and a female I felt uncomfortable. Looking for advice from females from this forum. No offence towards mails. Bcs I also have a man and from where they think😉

Is this feeling normal. What precautions u take and how u set boundaries?

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By *eena500 OP Couple
19 weeks ago

Dublin

On a second thought may be it will good to know men’s view on this point.

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By *ealitybitesMan
19 weeks ago

Belfast

I've had 2 different women insist that we meet in their homes.

I turned them both down because I felt if they had so little thought for their own safety they were going to allow me as a complete stranger into their home they weren't people I wanted to meet.

I don't meet anyone without at least one social in a public space and even that isn't foolproof as I found out on my very first fab meet years ago.

I know of fabbers who have been kicked out of chatgroups for following women home and other women asking for them to be added back into the group because they were hot!

I genuinely don't understand how lax some people are with giving out phone numbers and addresses.

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By *argus12Man
19 weeks ago

meath dublin

As a single woman you should never meet anyone at there home on a first meet. Always insist on a clean meet first. Get to know them first. At the feet least a couple of video chats.

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By (user no longer on site)
19 weeks ago

I would always have a social meet first, safety comes first. Always

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By *hePixieAndTheBearCouple
19 weeks ago

Galway

As nice as people might be, we wouldn't take the chance. Social meet in a public venue is non negotiable. And if things go well, very very strong preference for first play meet in a neutral venue.

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By *og-ManMan
19 weeks ago

somewhere

If anyone ever feels their spider senses tingling then go with it and pull away from any type of meet social or play

Do what feels right for you

I've had meets where I've gone straight to a house and others where we met socially first

Both felt right and I'd have no issue saying no for any reason

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By (user no longer on site)
19 weeks ago

My tuppence worth ..1st meet .. single... couple.. whatever..always a safe public place , you have no idea of who you're meeting, so a safe , public place would be it for me.

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By *ursecretmischiefCouple
19 weeks ago

The West

"My tuppence worth ..1st meet .. single... couple.. whatever..always a safe public place , you have no idea of who you're meeting, so a safe , public place would be it for me. "

Definitely this! For all, women couples and men.

You should stop and think what sort of situation you could be putting yourself in.

What happens if you don't like them, or they're intimidating.

Even for men with the best intentions, how do you know hers are!

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By *ealitybitesMan
19 weeks ago

Belfast

"My tuppence worth ..1st meet .. single... couple.. whatever..always a safe public place , you have no idea of who you're meeting, so a safe , public place would be it for me.

Definitely this! For all, women couples and men.

You should stop and think what sort of situation you could be putting yourself in.

What happens if you don't like them, or they're intimidating.

Even for men with the best intentions, how do you know hers are!"

This is how I see it. I had 2 separate coffee meets with a woman before my first hotel meet and her intentions weren't good at all and led to me leaving the site straight after.

I can only imagine how much worse it could have been if we had been in her home.

I don't trust people just because they have been verified by others and I don't want anyone trusting me just because I have a few verifications either. I'd much prefer if they took the time to get to know me first.

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By *agneyandhutchCouple
19 weeks ago

lucan

We would never go blindly to someone's house or a hotel meet. And from previous experience I'm dubious about going to anyone's house after knowing them for a while. It's difficult to turn on your heels and run away if you turn up at a kip or it stinks of dog/cat.

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By *licat.2Woman
19 weeks ago

Not Belfast but NI

No matter how well the messaging goes, I would always have a social meet in a public place. And if no chemistry, no fun!

First play meet always in a hotel.

It's non-negotiable.

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By *irishladMan
19 weeks ago

North County Dublin

I've done both but it's easier for a guy to turn on his heels and walk away first meet at someone's house is always more nerve racking

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By *antra MassageMan
19 weeks ago

Galway

Always ,first meet,in a public place, under the cameras, in full view of the staff and customers.

Park your car away from the venue, so you can't be watched returning to it.

Stick to your plan: coffee, chat, leave.

Leave desperately.

Decide later if you want to meet again.

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By *antra MassageMan
19 weeks ago

Galway

...separately.....aaaagh!

Not desperately

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By *avie tCouple
19 weeks ago

otherside of nowhere

For us the social meet is a must...we go home have our own chat and take it from there...First meet is hotel and then if we/they decide to meet again then our place if their comfortable with that.....we find a party is the best option safety in numbers no need for the social first and everyone's home address is kept private...win win..

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By *eena500 OP Couple
19 weeks ago

Dublin

Thanks for wise advice and after reading your comments I feel like there is nothing wrong with me, my instincts were right!!

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By *mmmm300Woman
19 weeks ago

cork

Always always a social first, then always a hotel until perhaps we get to know each other a bit more

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By (user no longer on site)
19 weeks ago

I'm not into drugs and had meets with two different couples both with drugs openly on display for use ....clear that up before you go ....saves having to leave

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By *razyNippleLoverMan
19 weeks ago

Back End of Beyond

I've come across this before but found the urgency wears off around the same time as the drink, any requests I got like that was usually Friday, Saturday nights , or Sunday morning hangover horn.

Shoot me if it's a sweeping generalisation I almost immediately suspect it to be the fella part of the couple when it comes to them kinda requests and not a joint decision or lady involved!!!

My suspicious nature never let me act on them kinda requests I also need the auld social meet first to check connection

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By *electableicecreamMan
19 weeks ago

The West

I'd never go to someone's house unless they invited me.

That's it.

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By *errylad90Man
19 weeks ago

cork

"I've had 2 different women insist that we meet in their homes.

I turned them both down because I felt if they had so little thought for their own safety they were going to allow me as a complete stranger into their home they weren't people I wanted to meet.

I don't meet anyone without at least one social in a public space and even that isn't foolproof as I found out on my very first fab meet years ago.

I know of fabbers who have been kicked out of chatgroups for following women home and other women asking for them to be added back into the group because they were hot!

I genuinely don't understand how lax some people are with giving out phone numbers and addresses. "

I never thought about it that way but you make a lot of sense there. I know I’m a genuine normal, respectful guy with now ulterior motives when visiting someone’s home.

But how do they know. People mostly exchange messages and make a decision based on that interaction.

There must be some horror stories out there though

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By *he boy next door300Man
19 weeks ago

MAGHERAFELT

"We started chatting with someone and within hrs they asked us to meet for play at their home.

They might be very nice people. Not raising fingers on them at all.

But as a newbie and a female I felt uncomfortable. Looking for advice from females from this forum. No offence towards mails. Bcs I also have a man and from where they think😉

Is this feeling normal. What precautions u take and how u set boundaries?"

If you feel uncomfortable about it

, trust your instinct and move on. This is supposed to be fun.

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By *alted!Man
19 weeks ago

Cork

I've meet a few by going straight to their house. Always been a possative experience. But can't say it has not been nerve racking experance walking up and in a door and not knowing if I was going to have to fight to get back out that same door. But that's some of the excitement too.

So it depends on the type of person you are. It's not something I would recommend that a single lady goes and does. But a couple? Why not if ye are the type that know how to get yourselves out of trouble as fast as you can get yourself into it.

That said no-one is ever coming to my place without a decent social meet 1st. Brought a crazy home from a pub one night and it took weeks to for her to go away, even after a straight up "I don't want to see you ever again " conversation. Stage 5 clinger! Unannounced calls to the door days and nights.

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By *rish_vixenWoman
19 weeks ago

kerry

"My tuppence worth ..1st meet .. single... couple.. whatever..always a safe public place , you have no idea of who you're meeting, so a safe , public place would be it for me.

Definitely this! For all, women couples and men.

You should stop and think what sort of situation you could be putting yourself in.

What happens if you don't like them, or they're intimidating.

Even for men with the best intentions, how do you know hers are!

This is how I see it. I had 2 separate coffee meets with a woman before my first hotel meet and her intentions weren't good at all and led to me leaving the site straight after.

I can only imagine how much worse it could have been if we had been in her home.

Being nosey here but what did she do!?

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By *ealitybitesMan
19 weeks ago

Belfast

"My tuppence worth ..1st meet .. single... couple.. whatever..always a safe public place , you have no idea of who you're meeting, so a safe , public place would be it for me.

Definitely this! For all, women couples and men.

You should stop and think what sort of situation you could be putting yourself in.

What happens if you don't like them, or they're intimidating.

Even for men with the best intentions, how do you know hers are!

This is how I see it. I had 2 separate coffee meets with a woman before my first hotel meet and her intentions weren't good at all and led to me leaving the site straight after.

I can only imagine how much worse it could have been if we had been in her home.

Being nosey here but what did she do!?"

I've told this story often enough before.

She punched me full on in the face as soon as we got undressed and announced that it was her kink for me to retaliate.

I told her she had picked the wrong guy for that shit and got dressed again. I asked why she hadn't mentioned it before.

She said she was afraid I wouldn't turn up and then she apologised profusely and said she was in the wrong and convinced me to stay.

An hour later I walked out of the bathroom and she drove her knee into my balls so I left at that point and left the site a couple of days later thinking it was full of loons like her.

She was half my size but that's not the point.

Imagine if the roles had been reversed and even though I hadn't touched her it would always be her word against mine if she decided to complain.

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By * DareCouple
19 weeks ago

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[Removed by poster at 15/03/25 06:35:04]

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By * DareCouple
19 weeks ago

….

[Removed by poster at 15/03/25 06:35:11]

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By * DareCouple
19 weeks ago

….

No way would we go to their home. As well as safety it’s not the way we want our fab experience. A social meet is a must and then leave to get time to see if there was any kind of attraction there, chat about it and allow that build a little…. basically so you can be looking forward to meeting the person again. Much prefer a social meet anyway in public, it takes a lot of the pressure off meeting someone for the first time. Could never just rock up to someone’s home we didn’t know!!

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By *obroyman17Man
19 weeks ago

"I've had 2 different women insist that we meet in their homes.

I turned them both down because I felt if they had so little thought for their own safety they were going to allow me as a complete stranger into their home they weren't people I wanted to meet.

This for sure, it’s not safe imo

If they vvv well verified I’d make a judgement call but if new or no verifications I’d insist on a public meet

I don't meet anyone without at least one social in a public space and even that isn't foolproof as I found out on my very first fab meet years ago.

I know of fabbers who have been kicked out of chatgroups for following women home and other women asking for them to be added back into the group because they were hot!

I genuinely don't understand how lax some people are with giving out phone numbers and addresses. "

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By *iresmillyWoman
19 weeks ago

Stillorgan

So, I always do a social Meetup first. But I’d rather a hotel meet or my place instead of their place. I’m more comfortable in my own surroundings and I live in a complex with security, cameras, and panic alarms linked to private security (not prison lol), so I actually prefer hosting TBH. I would never go to their place- the paranoid in me would be terrified that they would have secret cameras recording me etc.

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By *ealitybitesMan
19 weeks ago

Belfast

"I've had 2 different women insist that we meet in their homes.

I turned them both down because I felt if they had so little thought for their own safety they were going to allow me as a complete stranger into their home they weren't people I wanted to meet.

This for sure, it’s not safe imo

If they vvv well verified I’d make a judgement call but if new or no verifications I’d insist on a public meet

I don't meet anyone without at least one social in a public space and even that isn't foolproof as I found out on my very first fab meet years ago.

I know of fabbers who have been kicked out of chatgroups for following women home and other women asking for them to be added back into the group because they were hot!

I genuinely don't understand how lax some people are with giving out phone numbers and addresses. "

Both women were well verified. One of them had 100+ verifications but that's not the point.

They were insistent that they didn't do socials and wouldn't meet anywhere else so that was 100+ people they had given their address to and allowed into their home.

I was still a complete stranger to them and they to me so it was a non starter.

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