FabSwingers.com forum: Social/party etiquette

By *ueen_Meadhbh OP Woman
19 weeks ago

sligo

So for the newbies and not ao newbies share some party and social etiquette

My biggest peeve when it comes to socials is people sharing the location with people who aren't attending. Seriously folks it's noone business if they not going. Some fabbers are comfortable with people knowing they om fan but majority of people don't want non fabbers to know whether that's work reasons, family life reasons etc.

A social is just a social, theamount of " guys" and I'm basing this on the fact I've hosted a few socials, it's amazing how many guys think we will all be naked in a bar getting it on, or the expectation that they will get the ride at the end of the night.

Any other tips

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By *affa31Woman
19 weeks ago

Galway

If you have asked for an invite and can no longer make it, let the host know as soon as you know.

We spend a lot of time confirming guests lists etc and a lot of this time is wasted by people replying that they’re actually away that day etc.

Plans change and that’s fine, but have the courtesy to let the host know.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
19 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

Bad: Getting really d*unk

Completely inexcusable: Arriving d*unk

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By *yeCandyDublinCouple
19 weeks ago

Lucan

"If you have asked for an invite and can no longer make it, let the host know as soon as you know.

We spend a lot of time confirming guests lists etc and a lot of this time is wasted by people replying that they’re actually away that day etc.

Plans change and that’s fine, but have the courtesy to let the host know. "

This ⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️

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By *!nksgirlWoman
19 weeks ago

IRELAND

oh that winds me up something serious. cos you have declined a ticket to someone else! just manners to let a host know ASAP.

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By *!nksgirlWoman
19 weeks ago

IRELAND

"Bad: Getting really d*unk

Completely inexcusable: Arriving d*unk"

if anyone arrives d*unk at our socials they are declined entry. if they get rat arsed at event they are put in a taxi to where they are staying.

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By *arbles00Man
19 weeks ago

Area 54

No means no. Just because it's a play party doesn't mean you can have whoever you want.

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By *!nksgirlWoman
19 weeks ago

IRELAND

"So for the newbies and not ao newbies share some party and social etiquette

Any other tips"

when a guest thinks it's a 'free for all & touchy feely' with other guests DESPITE being sent an email beforehand clearly stating that it's NOT OK. Even in the chatgroup set up for that event, it's clearly discussed what is expected of guests.... Consent & respect is expected & deserved by EVERY guest attending. my mantra for a long time is

"Don't be a Dick"

everyone gets ONE chance with me.... if they blow that chance then 'ODF' is invoked

...'Out Da Fuck'...

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By (user no longer on site)
19 weeks ago

The idea that it’s some sort of gangbang always makes me giggle

. The lads who can’t attend a social because they are “shy” on here with cocks out and wanna fuck with everyone .

Turn up and behave like you would in any social events .

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By *antra MassageMan
19 weeks ago

Galway

We always started our meets early, 7 pm, reducing the risk of people turning up d*unk.

Some guys hired a "pretend" partner for the evening, in order to be invited as a couple. It's easy to spot, but creates tension .

Don't reveal the location to non attendees.

Stay sober.

Men..talk to other husbands partners. If he doesn't trust or like you, you'll never get intimate with his wife.

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By *heGeneral24Man
19 weeks ago

Limerick City

Drugs = in any shape or form = NOOOOOO.

Pub / bar toilets = NOOOOOOO i dont want any of yer f$$king drugs. It's a pandemic at this stage. Ridiculous

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By *electableicecreamMan
19 weeks ago

The West

The whole drinking thing is kinda funny.

I see a lot of new guys being advised not to get d*unk at events and that is indeed great advice.

Yet any social event I've been to has had loads of d*unks. It appears to be the norm. Like a hen/stag party.

So I suppose my advice would be to stay relatively sober despite the party atmosphere.

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By *ealitybitesMan
19 weeks ago

Belfast

"So for the newbies and not ao newbies share some party and social etiquette

Any other tips

"Don't be a Dick"

everyone gets ONE chance with me.... if they blow that chance then 'ODF' is invoked

...'Out Da Fuck'..."

I agree with this but in my experience a lot of women don't believe those rules apply to them.

I've left one social because the male half of a couple was pestering my friend for sex within minutes of them walking into the room. He made similar advances towards other women there and when he got nowhere he came back to my friend and we left at that point.

However I have witnessed numerous women taking the touchy feely approach to men at various events and I have experienced it personally. I didn't welcome it and it was pretty obvious some of the other men weren't comfortable with it either.

If a man was to do what some of those women did they would be removed immediately but there seems to be a reluctance to remove a woman for bad behaviour.

I've seen women post here in the forums that they have also witnessed this behaviour and they can't understand why no action is take so it's not a unique experience.

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By *eard and BoobsCouple
19 weeks ago

Portstewart

Be polite

Don't get d*unk

If you chatting to a couple make sure that your actually talking to both of them and not just the one you want

Don't message others in the chat about any individual that's just nasty

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
19 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

Dont get me wrong we both enjoy a drink, and will have a few drinks at socials, but I guess the key is not to lose control of yourself and to maintain your respect for yourself and others around you. I guess to an extent the same goes for drugs. We wouldn't be partaking in these things at a social. An adult should respect the wishes of others not to have it in their faces and to maintain control. "I was d*unk/high" is never an excuse for bad behaviour.

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By *og-ManMan
19 weeks ago

somewhere

It's impossible to say hello to everyone you want to at a social and names get confusing so don't worry if you can't remember everyone.

Try to join it with any chat groups set up before the social and it can help break the ice

Also if you need help as you're on your own and you're nervous just ask.

You'd be amazed how friendly most people are and always willing to help a newbie

If it's a social in a hotel then usually people are staying overnight and sometimes for the whole weekend

There's usually people meeting up on the Saturday afternoon in the bar for a drink and dinner ...join in....its a lot easier to chat when there's no music being played

Enjoy yourself

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By *hePixieAndTheBearCouple
19 weeks ago

Galway

"If it's a social in a hotel then usually people are staying overnight and sometimes for the whole weekend

There's usually people meeting up on the Saturday afternoon in the bar for a drink and dinner ...join in....its a lot easier to chat when there's no music being played"

+1 to this. The first couple socials we attended were like that and a fair few people were staying over a day ahead. We did the same and the Friday evening drinks have been a fantastic opportunity for us to chat with a few people in a less loud/crowded setting and helped a lot by ensuring we had at least a few familiar faces during the main event.

For another tip: organisers will know a lot of attendees. If you are looking for the people behind a profile which took your fancy, don't be shy and ask them to point them to you.

Etiquette-wise, if you're chatting up the lady from a couple and her partner swings by to say hi, that's kind of a good thing, so uh, don't run away?

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By *eekyNerdMan
19 weeks ago

Port

Thanks for having this thread. I have yet to get to an evening social but seeing these suggestions is great. they all make sense, should be common knowledge etc.

Just because its related to fab doesn't mean it should be any different than a normal night out. Respect and consent all the way.

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By *ungry CatCouple
19 weeks ago

Belfast

It's a dress, not a "yes" - absolutely unbelievable that some people need a reminder that the clothes people wear don't imply consent to be touched nor pestered.

People also often forget that it is perfectly acceptable to go up and introduce yourself politely to others and end up expecting others to come to them instead. Gotta take the first plunge and just do it.

Follow the rules - organizers will usually very clearly communicate all what to expect, what is expected from attendees and what rules are categorically not to be broken, yet people will still not read nor try to understand why those rules are in place and do exact opposite.

"I have enough friends" - anyone with this kind of attitude shouldn't attend socials of any kind. We are all here for the same thing - find people we get on with and can have some sexy times with. If someone has zero interest in having sexy times with someone they might get along with and are just looking for a dry hookup, they will most likely just go around the room creeping people out with seductive variations of "wanna meet".

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By *espond2004Man
19 weeks ago

Travel with work

100% - having organised some group meets theres nothing worse than a previously confirmed attendee not turning up. Lots of time & effort goes into getting the right mix of people.

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By *rRiosMan
19 weeks ago

dublin

"The whole drinking thing is kinda funny.

I see a lot of new guys being advised not to get d*unk at events and that is indeed great advice.

Yet any social event I've been to has had loads of d*unks. It appears to be the norm. Like a hen/stag party.

So I suppose my advice would be to stay relatively sober despite the party atmosphere."

Office Christmas party etiquette, don’t be the d*unkest, it’s ok to be the second d*unkest

Don’t be a dick and manage your expectations accordingly

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By (user no longer on site)
19 weeks ago

Hi all I have never attended any of these socials, just wondering how does one get an invite, do you need to be part of a clique or is it random ?

Just asking

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By *ueen_Meadhbh OP Woman
19 weeks ago

sligo

"Hi all I have never attended any of these socials, just wondering how does one get an invite, do you need to be part of a clique or is it random ?

Just asking"

There's an unverified social on 1st April check the forums

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By *herest KhanMan
19 weeks ago

The Jungle

"Hi all I have never attended any of these socials, just wondering how does one get an invite, do you need to be part of a clique or is it random ?

Just asking"
they are 'advertised' in the forums regularly. There's 1 in Tuam soon. First step to getting an invite is asking for an invite.

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By *affa31Woman
19 weeks ago

Galway

Baffles me that people thing you need to be part of a group or clique to attend socials.

If I was organising a night/day out with my friends/clique/group/whatever you want to call it, why would I advertise it on the forum

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By *hePixieAndTheBearCouple
19 weeks ago

Galway

"Hi all I have never attended any of these socials, just wondering how does one get an invite, do you need to be part of a clique or is it random ?

Just asking"

The first step is getting verified. There's a regular "Help a fabber out" thread to help with that. There are also specially organised "Unverified socials" like the one in Tuam on 1st if April which are an even better option as you'll get a good few verifs while enjoying a little evening out with part of the community.

Once you're verified, then it's just up to you to look up for socials here. There's a big event calendar thread that will give you an overview, then each event will likely have its own thread. The event thread and/or organiser profile will have details for eligibility (verifications, gender, referral, previous attendances...). Many will just require recent verifications. Just find one you're interested in and apply for it. Just try not to leave it late though as it could be sold out or the event accommodation might be full.

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