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Approaching couples

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By *aybeLady OP   Woman
6 days ago

West Dublin

I was at Envy social last night. Full of couples. I am single but would fall into that unicorn illusive category.

I am going to be honest but I would find it very difficult to approach couples at an event like this. I am not the most outgoing person first off, so that is a hinderence.

Couples obvs seem to know other couples so they stayed in their own groups. I would not feel comfortable swanning over and trying to chat with that dymanic.

Its a tricky one to infiltrate/navigate

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By *ildmovementMan
6 days ago

south Central

Any meet is tricky to navigate when your new to a scene than many have been going to for ages and know each other.

Its about relaxing and been yourself. A friendly smile or catch someone's eye is always best I find and then they get comfortable that your approachable and I find a conversation can flow from there.

Remember not all couples are looking for a unicorn.

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By *aybeLady OP   Woman
6 days ago

West Dublin


"Any meet is tricky to navigate when your new to a scene than many have been going to for ages and know each other.

Its about relaxing and been yourself. A friendly smile or catch someone's eye is always best I find and then they get comfortable that your approachable and I find a conversation can flow from there.

Remember not all couples are looking for a unicorn. "

I'm aware not all couples are looking for a unicorn and bi play is not essential for me either.

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By *osyRedLipsWoman
6 days ago

Kildare

It gets easier I was very nervous going to my first social didn't know a soul. But if you keep going you'll get to know more people each time so it's easier to get chatting or get introductions.

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By *ofusplusCouple
6 days ago

Limerick

I find the smaller coffee socials much easier for getting to know people. Then when you've built connections that way, arrange to attend a larger social with those connections.

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By *oe Cool xxxMan
6 days ago

South Dublin

I’m not shy at all and have gone to loads of socials solo, I’m very sociable and can hold a conversation.

But I find at some events couples group together and bit clique-y so hard to approach and if you do you get the look as if to say “ Why is he here”

And also if you chat to a wife the hubby gets all territorial so ya end up just walking away,it’s a minefield

At big events singles disappear into the background,so do think the Wristband idea is good so people know if you’re single.

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By *oe Cool xxxMan
6 days ago

South Dublin

As I said to ya , set yourself a challenge or two at next social, get out f your comfort zone , if you see a couple that catches your eye just approach them , easy fir woman as you can comment on what woman is wearing and bang your chatting.


"I was at Envy social last night. Full of couples. I am single but would fall into that unicorn illusive category.

I am going to be honest but I would find it very difficult to approach couples at an event like this. I am not the most outgoing person first off, so that is a hinderence.

Couples obvs seem to know other couples so they stayed in their own groups. I would not feel comfortable swanning over and trying to chat with that dymanic.

Its a tricky one to infiltrate/navigate "

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By *ildmovementMan
6 days ago

south Central


"It gets easier I was very nervous going to my first social didn't know a soul. But if you keep going you'll get to know more people each time so it's easier to get chatting or get introductions. "

Very much this. 👍 Get to know a few people and from the other post the smaller socials can be easier to engage with people and get to know them. They don't have to be okay partnerships but good to know and attend bigger socials

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By *ildmovementMan
6 days ago

south Central


"Any meet is tricky to navigate when your new to a scene than many have been going to for ages and know each other.

Its about relaxing and been yourself. A friendly smile or catch someone's eye is always best I find and then they get comfortable that your approachable and I find a conversation can flow from there.

Remember not all couples are looking for a unicorn.

I'm aware not all couples are looking for a unicorn and bi play is not essential for me either. "

I wasn't at this social but from been previously I would guess the couples that know each other may not play together and are only socially connected. It does leave them harder to approach though like you said.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
6 days ago

East / North, Cork

Its not easy when you don't know anyone. I remember finding it a good approach to find one person and then ask them to introduce you to someone else. Either that or ask the host to make a few introductions.

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By *he_Secret_GardenWoman
6 days ago

Naughty Lane


"I was at Envy social last night. Full of couples. I am single but would fall into that unicorn illusive category.

I am going to be honest but I would find it very difficult to approach couples at an event like this. I am not the most outgoing person first off, so that is a hinderence.

Couples obvs seem to know other couples so they stayed in their own groups. I would not feel comfortable swanning over and trying to chat with that dymanic.

Its a tricky one to infiltrate/navigate "
I feel your pain..😉

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By *AwickedCouple
6 days ago

Dublin

I have always found that pre-drinks is the best place to make connections. It’s just a matter of finding out where they are happening.

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By *om TangoMan
6 days ago

aughnacloy monaghan area

Was there no telegram group set up before hand to get chatting to others. When I go to socials the last thing in my head is wondering if that couple plays with single men. In my head I want to meet new people and I always try to set out to meet 3 new people at a social regardless if they are couples single or their sex or their sexual preference. Just go and talk. Try make new friends. Don’t be thinking of the play bit or what someone wants. It’s a social to be sociable. Not a play date

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By *og-ManMan
6 days ago

somewhere

Pity there wasn't a chat group you could have joined first

Maybe next time you could also post a thread about going to a social and looking for someone that's also going to help you make introductions

Even if people you met previously in DV8 were going

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By *oe Cool xxxMan
6 days ago

South Dublin

I’ll always meet many I have previously met at othwr socials but I find at some parties thers loads couples that only go to specific parties and have around in herds so is harder to chat.

But yes also if you know someone there they can introduce to to couples.


"Pity there wasn't a chat group you could have joined first

Maybe next time you could also post a thread about going to a social and looking for someone that's also going to help you make introductions

Even if people you met previously in DV8 were going "

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By *eeking_sensuality77Woman
6 days ago

Athlone

I've gone to a couple of night time events, been to the regular Sunday evening social and also a couple of days time coffee socials.

As a non drinker I've come to the conclusion that the night time ones are just not for me. I've tried, but really I just don't fit in.

The day time coffee socials that LadynRed organise are just lovely. They attract a great bunch of people who are all willing to mingle and chat and make new connections.

Conclusion....get yourself to a day time event if you can!

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By *urvyButCute_SilCouple
6 days ago

Galway

We are also new and that was our first event, we are extreamly shy and were too nervous to approach any single guys we were interested in. I do agree would be great to be able to chat leading up to it or know whos on the guest list so you can see thier profiles and have an idea of what they are looking for so you know who to approach. There seemed to be alot of couples, was expecting more of a mix of couples and singles. In saying that it was an amazing night and definately would love to go again. Hopefully the more we go the more people wel meet and comfertable we will get.

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By *yeCandyDublinCouple
6 days ago

Lucan


"Its not easy when you don't know anyone. I remember finding it a good approach to find one person and then ask them to introduce you to someone else. Either that or ask the host to make a few introductions."

Absolutely this….we personally love to meet singles at events & when we do we do our best to be inclusive and introduce the person to others It can sometimes seem that everyone knows each other but that’s not often the case.

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By *om TangoMan
6 days ago

aughnacloy monaghan area

Come to pinks social in Dundalk on 8th February and I’ll personally introduce yous to those I know. Couples and singles or whatever your comfortable with.

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By *inky Bear and VicsCouple
5 days ago

Northern Ireland


"We are also new and that was our first event, we are extreamly shy and were too nervous to approach any single guys we were interested in. I do agree would be great to be able to chat leading up to it or know whos on the guest list so you can see thier profiles and have an idea of what they are looking for so you know who to approach. There seemed to be alot of couples, was expecting more of a mix of couples and singles. In saying that it was an amazing night and definately would love to go again. Hopefully the more we go the more people wel meet and comfertable we will get. "

We went to a thing once (I'll not name it because the organisers did a great job) and it did have a group chat. However it was so fast paced it was overwhelming and they all seemed to already know each other. When we attended it was the same story, groups were already formed and I felt so out of place.

So I think group chats can have their problems too.

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By *ickeldimeCouple
5 days ago

Poynton

Went to a social in Limerick last year. It became apparent that most of the couples new each other. They sat together in groups backs towards you so you couldn't engage even if you wanted too. Won't go again.

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By *ickheadcuntCouple
5 days ago

Cork Ireland

So many possibilities here for this one i don't know your dynamic as in what exactly you're looking for but if it was just as simple you wanted to play with both of them just come right out and say it, it cuts time and a miss understanding.

One thing I see time and again is a guy or girl comes up talking to us both but is clearly only interested in one of us and the latter is kinda treated like a spare wheel.

In my (DH) opinion if your interested in the male of a couple pay attention and get the ok from the female 1st and the same the other way around.

It's a simple common curtesy and sometimes in the heat of the night people forget this too.

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By *ickheadcuntCouple
5 days ago

Cork Ireland

And by the way people that have been here a long time and know a lot of people are always trying to meet new people but they get caught up chatting with old friends, this happens time and time again.

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By *itlbeeCouple
5 days ago

.

My advice to you is to go up to other women, even the female half of couples. And I produce yourself and let them know your brand new.

You could ask them if they know any couples who play woth single women who they'd like to introduce you to..

This is a good approach because it doesn't assume they are looking for a unicorn, but gives them the opportunity to let you know if they are.

It shows you as a "girls girl". This is important as you'll always want to develop a good rapport with other women .

Even if they aren't bi, you need that woman to like you for them to feel comfortable sharing their partner with you.

When you announce yourself as new it gives people an opportunity to strike up conversation about that, and introduce yourself to others.

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By *aybeLady OP   Woman
5 days ago

West Dublin


"My advice to you is to go up to other women, even the female half of couples. And I produce yourself and let them know your brand new.

You could ask them if they know any couples who play woth single women who they'd like to introduce you to..

This is a good approach because it doesn't assume they are looking for a unicorn, but gives them the opportunity to let you know if they are.

It shows you as a "girls girl". This is important as you'll always want to develop a good rapport with other women .

Even if they aren't bi, you need that woman to like you for them to feel comfortable sharing their partner with you.

When you announce yourself as new it gives people an opportunity to strike up conversation about that, and introduce yourself to others. "

Good advise, thank you xx

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By *eeisbackMan
5 days ago

….

You’re not alone in this topic and I would say others are in same opinion. Alot of people couples and singles are in different cliques on fab and different events so Its sometimes hard to get chatting or be wanted in these groups.

Some cliques only want the super hot super good looking popular people . I’d be a millionaire at this stage with the amount of times. I’ve been told o your not my type or your not the type to be invited to an event.

I’ve been to a few envy's and know the organisers and have the upmost respect they’re so welcoming and run a good event.

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By *e r usCouple
4 days ago

derry

Is the same for couples who aren't very active at home and prefer to travel abroad. Not really in any clique here but any single ladies want to say hello will be treated with the respect they deserve.

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