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By *arondublin24 OP   Man
2 weeks ago

artane

Looking for a female who wants to explore this lifestyle with someone they trust so it makes it safer for them and easier for me as a male. . Let's meet for a drink which hopefully leads to some long term swapping fun

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ueen_MeadhbhWoman
2 weeks ago

sligo

Good luck with that, I've seen long established couples break up when they start swinging.

Its not as easy just meet someone,becone a fab couple and swing lots of dynamics to navigate like finding 4 people all attracted to each other boundaries dos and donts, trust od earned not easily given.

And personally I'd think the guy was using ne to meet other people.

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By *arondublin24 OP   Man
2 weeks ago

artane

Yeah meadhbh that's what I meant partnership not relationship someone who wants to explore this lifestyle and feel safe with a partner

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Good luck with that, I've seen long established couples break up when they start swinging.

Its not as easy just meet someone,becone a fab couple and swing lots of dynamics to navigate like finding 4 people all attracted to each other boundaries dos and donts, trust od earned not easily given.

And personally I'd think the guy was using ne to meet other people. "
...I've read this on a lot of women's profiles.."looking for a partner in crime". I also have it on mine.

It's fairly common tbh. And to be perfectly frank, a lot of men will go with the flow, the don't seem to be as choosy when it comes to a group meet. Just my observation anyway.

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By *arondublin24 OP   Man
2 weeks ago

artane

Yeah seems like a good agreement if you both get along why not have a partner In crime you trust 😉

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By *iresmillyWoman
2 weeks ago

Dublin

I think it’s a great idea. I’m sure there are single women here who would enjoy the safety of having a situationship and being able to integrate that with someone else, and then attend socials at home and abroad with someone else. Good for you being proactive!

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By *eard and BoobsCouple
2 weeks ago

Portstewart

Great idea in theory but to us it sounds like you are trying to find a way to get around those people like ourselves who don't meet single males as personally they have nothing to offer us

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"I think it’s a great idea. I’m sure there are single women here who would enjoy the safety of having a situationship and being able to integrate that with someone else, and then attend socials at home and abroad with someone else. Good for you being proactive!"
...a mutually beneficial agreement...without any jealousy

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *aid backMan
2 weeks ago

by a lake with my rod out

The only problem you have is most lads are looking for the same thing because it's easier to get meets/invites to parties of you team up with a woman. The only fault in you plan is women don't need a man to be very active on the scene. So basically women would see your offer as you using them to get more active

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By *arondublin24 OP   Man
2 weeks ago

artane

Lots of good points I'm not looking to fool anyone just looking to meet a like minded girl and have fun if it doesn't work for another couple they can just decline

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"The only problem you have is most lads are looking for the same thing because it's easier to get meets/invites to parties of you team up with a woman. The only fault in you plan is women don't need a man to be very active on the scene. So basically women would see your offer as you using them to get more active "
...balance that against a woman feeling safe going to group meets with someone she trusts,and if the agreement is reached beforehand...everyone wins...the woman gets chaperoned, the man has easier access to parties etc..

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By *arondublin24 OP   Man
2 weeks ago

artane

Yeah I'm sure if she trust me it makes it easier for other to trust me . . No ?

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By *ionycusMan
2 weeks ago

Babylon

Good luck with it .

The best way to find out if there is a woman looking for the same situation is post it on here and maybe your bio too.

I think done couples might not like the idea of it as it appears you have less skin in the game ,but i do t see it that way. Its smart. Find FWB and enjoy the benefits. I believe it's called mutuality.

Drive on my man.

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By *rystalsswingCouple
2 weeks ago

Galway

I think it's a great idea! If he finds someone who's looking for the same thing and they get on well, why not! As long as ye both respect eachother!

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By *eordie.Woman
2 weeks ago

The Sticks

I do enjoy having a partner in crime for events, there's a lot of pros to this arrangement if you get on and there's mutual respect

Not currently looking for new recruits however.... current holder of this position is performing very well

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By *itlbeeCouple
2 weeks ago

.

Would you be telling couples your not in a relationship or no?

If you don't, it would probably come out very quickly In most of the early conversations.

For couples, it's not just about the balance of numbers.

Swinging and open relationships can be very sensitive, the reason we look for other couples is we expect them to understand that dynamic, and be respectful of it.

Also from many of the single women I've talked to, they feel MORE safe in the swinging space than the normal singles hookup space.

They know how important reputation is on this scene, and how no one wants something bad happening at their event. Women in particular look out for one another.

You're a lot safer at a party with many people around than you are alone with some guy.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Great idea in theory but to us it sounds like you are trying to find a way to get around those people like ourselves who don't meet single males as personally they have nothing to offer us "
...they do have something to offer...if they have a female partner

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By *arondublin24 OP   Man
2 weeks ago

artane

Yeah maybe ill meet a few people at meets and get some verifications pretty new at this so just testing the waters not looking to offend anyone so yes I'll be telling the truth about the situation if one does arise . . . Any meets coming up i seen one in Galway next week but it's a little far for a coffee

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By *aughty MilfCouple
2 weeks ago

Fermanagh/Monaghan Ireland , Northern Ireland


"Yeah meadhbh that's what I meant partnership not relationship someone who wants to explore this lifestyle and feel safe with a partner "
Maybe try social events for newbies and get yourself meet verified first

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Yeah maybe ill meet a few people at meets and get some verifications pretty new at this so just testing the waters not looking to offend anyone so yes I'll be telling the truth about the situation if one does arise . . . Any meets coming up i seen one in Galway next week but it's a little far for a coffee "
...mate...do yourself a favour, you're in Dublin, there's bound to be loads of single women around you. Drop a few of them a message, if you go down the "attending socials" route..you'll end up with 50 veries and no further on. Be your own man.

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By *aughty MilfCouple
2 weeks ago

Fermanagh/Monaghan Ireland , Northern Ireland


"Yeah maybe ill meet a few people at meets and get some verifications pretty new at this so just testing the waters not looking to offend anyone so yes I'll be telling the truth about the situation if one does arise . . . Any meets coming up i seen one in Galway next week but it's a little far for a coffee ...mate...do yourself a favour, you're in Dublin, there's bound to be loads of single women around you. Drop a few of them a message, if you go down the "attending socials" route..you'll end up with 50 veries and no further on. Be your own man. "
Atleast if he attends a social like DV8 he'll get a chance and verified no guarantees messaging alot of ladies will get meets

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Yeah maybe ill meet a few people at meets and get some verifications pretty new at this so just testing the waters not looking to offend anyone so yes I'll be telling the truth about the situation if one does arise . . . Any meets coming up i seen one in Galway next week but it's a little far for a coffee ...mate...do yourself a favour, you're in Dublin, there's bound to be loads of single women around you. Drop a few of them a message, if you go down the "attending socials" route..you'll end up with 50 veries and no further on. Be your own man. Atleast if he attends a social like DV8 he'll get a chance and verified no guarantees messaging alot of ladies will get meets "
...I know...but the social veries are about on a par with cam veries...

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By *ueen_MeadhbhWoman
2 weeks ago

sligo


"Yeah maybe ill meet a few people at meets and get some verifications pretty new at this so just testing the waters not looking to offend anyone so yes I'll be telling the truth about the situation if one does arise . . . Any meets coming up i seen one in Galway next week but it's a little far for a coffee ...mate...do yourself a favour, you're in Dublin, there's bound to be loads of single women around you. Drop a few of them a message, if you go down the "attending socials" route..you'll end up with 50 veries and no further on. Be your own man. "

I disagree, get to a social abd neet a few people. Make some connections,

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By *aughty MilfCouple
2 weeks ago

Fermanagh/Monaghan Ireland , Northern Ireland


"Yeah maybe ill meet a few people at meets and get some verifications pretty new at this so just testing the waters not looking to offend anyone so yes I'll be telling the truth about the situation if one does arise . . . Any meets coming up i seen one in Galway next week but it's a little far for a coffee ...mate...do yourself a favour, you're in Dublin, there's bound to be loads of single women around you. Drop a few of them a message, if you go down the "attending socials" route..you'll end up with 50 veries and no further on. Be your own man. Atleast if he attends a social like DV8 he'll get a chance and verified no guarantees messaging alot of ladies will get meets ...I know...but the social veries are about on a par with cam veries..."
you could wait ages to get a meet as no verifications atleast attended a social may help that a social event has verified meeting you

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Yeah maybe ill meet a few people at meets and get some verifications pretty new at this so just testing the waters not looking to offend anyone so yes I'll be telling the truth about the situation if one does arise . . . Any meets coming up i seen one in Galway next week but it's a little far for a coffee ...mate...do yourself a favour, you're in Dublin, there's bound to be loads of single women around you. Drop a few of them a message, if you go down the "attending socials" route..you'll end up with 50 veries and no further on. Be your own man.

I disagree, get to a social abd neet a few people. Make some connections, "
....meet verified is the holy grail...in fairness to the chap, he has face pics showing. Put in the effort, it will pay off.

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By *aid backMan
2 weeks ago

by a lake with my rod out

My suggestion is enjoy fab get to events meet people in person you'll more than likely find someone you click with and go from there

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By *agic mike1Man
2 weeks ago

around

That's a key word you said!!

Trust!!

You can be 100% honest with someone but can they be the same with you??

Enjoy fab Op

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By *iresmillyWoman
2 weeks ago

Dublin


"Yeah maybe ill meet a few people at meets and get some verifications pretty new at this so just testing the waters not looking to offend anyone so yes I'll be telling the truth about the situation if one does arise . . . Any meets coming up i seen one in Galway next week but it's a little far for a coffee ...mate...do yourself a favour, you're in Dublin, there's bound to be loads of single women around you. Drop a few of them a message, if you go down the "attending socials" route..you'll end up with 50 veries and no further on. Be your own man. Atleast if he attends a social like DV8 he'll get a chance and verified no guarantees messaging alot of ladies will get meets ...I know...but the social veries are about on a par with cam veries..."

It’s not often you and I agree but I agree with you on this one. As a single woman, (still looking for the elusive male) You can tell who’s been to DV8 by the people who have given the social veris- and now I just ignore them as they aren’t a true representation. Someone goes for a few drinks on a Sunday night, doesn’t hook up but all the regulars give the same copy and paste veris. I much rather see some veris from actual one on one meets to get a better vibe.

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By *ueen_MeadhbhWoman
2 weeks ago

sligo


"Yeah maybe ill meet a few people at meets and get some verifications pretty new at this so just testing the waters not looking to offend anyone so yes I'll be telling the truth about the situation if one does arise . . . Any meets coming up i seen one in Galway next week but it's a little far for a coffee ...mate...do yourself a favour, you're in Dublin, there's bound to be loads of single women around you. Drop a few of them a message, if you go down the "attending socials" route..you'll end up with 50 veries and no further on. Be your own man.

I disagree, get to a social abd neet a few people. Make some connections, ....meet verified is the holy grail...in fairness to the chap, he has face pics showing. Put in the effort, it will pay off. "

Meet verified for some works. It's different for single women taking a chance neeting someone they don't know if given unverified guys chances and been stood up more than once.

Play veris aren't my go to. As I've met guys who were God's in bed according to some and I've come away thinking wtf.

At end of day got nothing to lose by attending a social, at this stage I'm only here to attend socials and have a great night in great company

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By *inky Bear and VicsCouple
2 weeks ago

Northern Ireland

When I was single I was approached for a team up situation and I felt used (like i was just a convenient person, nothing special), and also felt that the married couple that he was looking to get in with wouldn't be happy anyway because we weren't an established couple.

Now as a couple I would prefer another pair to actually be a real couple, with a trusting dynamic between them that would understand us too.

But that's us. You do you.

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By *ionycusMan
2 weeks ago

Babylon

I am available for any team that wants to discuss tactics .

Absolutely open to discuss it but honestly it would have to be very interesting and worthwhile because life is short and time is valuable. ♥️

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"Looking for a female who wants to explore this lifestyle with someone they trust so it makes it safer for them and easier for me as a male. . Let's meet for a drink which hopefully leads to some long term swapping fun "

The problem is that women dont need men to meet others. Unsuccessful men see this as a route to getting meets when they can't get em solo

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Looking for a female who wants to explore this lifestyle with someone they trust so it makes it safer for them and easier for me as a male. . Let's meet for a drink which hopefully leads to some long term swapping fun

The problem is that women dont need men to meet others. Unsuccessful men see this as a route to getting meets when they can't get em solo"
...nobody said it was a problem...its about coming to a mutually beneficial arrangement.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"Looking for a female who wants to explore this lifestyle with someone they trust so it makes it safer for them and easier for me as a male. . Let's meet for a drink which hopefully leads to some long term swapping fun

The problem is that women dont need men to meet others. Unsuccessful men see this as a route to getting meets when they can't get em solo...nobody said it was a problem...its about coming to a mutually beneficial arrangement. "

I said it's a problem. Many times it's a lot more beneficial to the man than it is to the woman.

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By *rizzyyMan
2 weeks ago

Dublin

You guys are always very hilarious. How do you get one on one meets when you'd most likely state on your profile no verification no msgs..cut us the newbies some slack.

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Looking for a female who wants to explore this lifestyle with someone they trust so it makes it safer for them and easier for me as a male. . Let's meet for a drink which hopefully leads to some long term swapping fun

The problem is that women dont need men to meet others. Unsuccessful men see this as a route to getting meets when they can't get em solo...nobody said it was a problem...its about coming to a mutually beneficial arrangement.

I said it's a problem. Many times it's a lot more beneficial to the man than it is to the woman."
...well the general consensus (on this thread) is that it's not a problem..im going with the majority on this..

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

Sure you believe what you like . What I see is a guy with no verifications starting a thread looking to team up with a woman, in order to get meets... When she can most likely get meets just fine

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Sure you believe what you like . What I see is a guy with no verifications starting a thread looking to team up with a woman, in order to get meets... When she can most likely get meets just fine"
...In this case it's about you believing what you like...

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By *og-ManMan
2 weeks ago

somewhere

It's a case of putting the cart before the horse when you're new.

You need to find a woman that's comfortable with you and having sex with you on a regular basis before you move onto meeting other people as a couple

Unless the whole point is to meet a woman, play with another couple or group separately and you two not having sex together

In that case you're not really needed anyway for the woman to enjoy herself

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"It's a case of putting the cart before the horse when you're new.

You need to find a woman that's comfortable with you and having sex with you on a regular basis before you move onto meeting other people as a couple

Unless the whole point is to meet a woman, play with another couple or group separately and you two not having sex together

In that case you're not really needed anyway for the woman to enjoy herself "
...isn't that what the op posted..?

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By *ionycusMan
2 weeks ago

Babylon

You can have cake and eat it too, you dont need to be in a committed relationships to swing together as FWBs. I understand as some say that THEY do, and that is nothing except their opinion, and only that. It does seem like an easy in, no emotional ties and getting a VIP pass and it is understandable that this night irk some people. In saying that , there's enough cock and pussy for everyone and it isn't going to run out so everyone should just embrace the prospect of two people forming a swinging couple and fucking away to their hearts content. Give me a shout if you get together with a lady if you're looking for another M.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"You can have cake and eat it too, you dont need to be in a committed relationships to swing together as FWBs. I understand as some say that THEY do, and that is nothing except their opinion, and only that. It does seem like an easy in, no emotional ties and getting a VIP pass and it is understandable that this night irk some people. In saying that , there's enough cock and pussy for everyone and it isn't going to run out so everyone should just embrace the prospect of two people forming a swinging couple and fucking away to their hearts content. Give me a shout if you get together with a lady if you're looking for another M.

"

I don't think anyone is saying that singles coupling up is a bad thing. That said it is a couples choice if they are interested in meeting another 'couple' who aren't really a couple or not. It's not bad per se. It's just a choice that people make for themselves to meet non-real couples of not. The bit that makes me uncomfortable is the idea that an unverified guy is suggesting keeping a single girl safe (from other unverified guys) as his part of a mutually beneficial arrangement, while she is acting as gatekeeper for vagina coming from couples that they meet together, who may or may not know that they are not an actual couple.

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"You can have cake and eat it too, you dont need to be in a committed relationships to swing together as FWBs. I understand as some say that THEY do, and that is nothing except their opinion, and only that. It does seem like an easy in, no emotional ties and getting a VIP pass and it is understandable that this night irk some people. In saying that , there's enough cock and pussy for everyone and it isn't going to run out so everyone should just embrace the prospect of two people forming a swinging couple and fucking away to their hearts content. Give me a shout if you get together with a lady if you're looking for another M.

I don't think anyone is saying that singles coupling up is a bad thing. That said it is a couples choice if they are interested in meeting another 'couple' who aren't really a couple or not. It's not bad per se. It's just a choice that people make for themselves to meet non-real couples of not. The bit that makes me uncomfortable is the idea that an unverified guy is suggesting keeping a single girl safe (from other unverified guys) as his part of a mutually beneficial arrangement, while she is acting as gatekeeper for vagina coming from couples that they meet together, who may or may not know that they are not an actual couple."
...but if they have a couples profile...doesn't that make them an "actual couple "?

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

No. A couples profile does not necessarily make an actual couple.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

Much like a single male profile doesn't make an actual single male lol

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Much like a single male profile doesn't make an actual single male lol"
..that's just you being judgemental tbh..

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded.

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. "
...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males....

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By *electableicecreamMan
2 weeks ago

The West

There's plenty of fwb couples on fab so you never know you might find what your looking. Certainly no harm in asking.

Just get out there and go for it.

I know some people are saying that your trying to bypass filters or just use a woman to get more but there's every chance you might meet a woman who wants to use you for the same reasons as you'll both enjoy the mutual benefits.

Definitely go to social events. It really is the best way to meet people.

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By *ionycusMan
2 weeks ago

Babylon

I believe it's semantics, as numbers , a single male is "one man", not necessarily single, as in two people is a "couple" as in more than one.

Whereas some people define a couple as two people in a relationship.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. ...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males...."

I think your definition of both the words "judgemental" and "couple" are both different to mine.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"I believe it's semantics, as numbers , a single male is "one man", not necessarily single, as in two people is a "couple" as in more than one.

Whereas some people define a couple as two people in a relationship.

"

This. Personally I think those in a committed relationship/marriage and swinging together or with permission is a complete different thing to two singles who are using each other to get an "in" with other couples/parties. That's my opinion though and I can see why it is personally beneficial for singles to try and see it in another way.

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By *electableicecreamMan
2 weeks ago

The West

Hunter I'm single and I have an fwb who I enjoy extra curricular activities with.

Nobody minds. Some people like it.

It's just a vibe. Plenty room for different vibes and no real reason to discount one that's different from the other.

There's no issue at all in the bigger picture here.

People just choose to engage in what they are interested in and when it's all up front and clear and everyone is having the great sex they went looking for sure what's not to like?

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By *lueLotusWoman
2 weeks ago

the wilderness


"Looking for a female who wants to explore this lifestyle with someone they trust so it makes it safer for them and easier for me as a male. . Let's meet for a drink which hopefully leads to some long term swapping fun "

I would be very interested if you lived nearer to me, so you're bound to find some interested women in Dublin 💖 I wouldn't be surprised if you've had a few pms already xx ps you're hot

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By *electableicecreamMan
2 weeks ago

The West

Fab puts everyone in boxes and those boxes are limited.

There's no box for 'friends who fuck and enjoy meeting other people for group sex'

Or for 'friends who like to fuck and like to be watched or swap with just two other people'

Pick your vibe like.

There's just one box for couple. If the boxes were Single, Duo, Trio etc then I think the absence of semantics would make this a much easier and enjoyable discussion.

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By *s LollyWoman
2 weeks ago

The pub then supermacs ...

It's definitely something id like, i do attend quite a few social events and having that one person to attend with always appealed to me.....

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

[Removed by poster at 02/12/24 10:33:30]

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"Hunter I'm single and I have an fwb who I enjoy extra curricular activities with.

Nobody minds. Some people like it.

It's just a vibe. Plenty room for different vibes and no real reason to discount one that's different from the other.

There's no issue at all in the bigger picture here.

People just choose to engage in what they are interested in and when it's all up front and clear and everyone is having the great sex they went looking for sure what's not to like?

"

Of course I'm not knocking singles playing in duos or triplets. We've played with fwbs before and it's all good. I wouldn't call fwbs couples is all, and as long as everyone is open and honest as to the arrangements then great!

It's the single unverified man trading safety from other single unverified men that is weirding me out.

(Typo fixed)

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By *he KakapoMan
2 weeks ago

A nice rock


"Hunter I'm single and I have an fwb who I enjoy extra curricular activities with.

Nobody minds. Some people like it.

It's just a vibe. Plenty room for different vibes and no real reason to discount one that's different from the other.

There's no issue at all in the bigger picture here.

People just choose to engage in what they are interested in and when it's all up front and clear and everyone is having the great sex they went looking for sure what's not to like?

Of course I'm not knocking singles playing in duos or triplets. We've played with fwbs before and it's all good. I wouldn't call fwbs couples is all, and as long as everyone is open and honest as to the arrangements then great!

It's the single unverified man trading safety from other single unverified men that is weirding me out.

(Typo fixed)"

You seem to be reading the post and intention as cynically as possible though.

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By *adylaceWoman
2 weeks ago

Waterford City

I'm always very undecided about arrangements like this. There is a lot to consider.

1. Do we feel safe with the guy that wants to team up

2. Will he put that safety first even if he is having a great time at something

3. Will jealousy creep in

4. Will I end up just minding him at events if he is new

5. Is the guy using me as just an easier way to get invited to stuff cos it's easier to get invited as a couple than a single.

I'm sure there are more that I'm not thinking of right now and to be honest like others have said. Most well organised events take people's safety seriously so they can often be less risky than meeting someone one on one. I'd be open to going to events with someone if the dynamic developes naturally but not sure i would actively search for someone specifically for that.

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. ...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males....

I think your definition of both the words "judgemental" and "couple" are both different to mine.

"
...single male = solo profile...its nobody's business what their personal circumstances are...couples profile a man and a woman usually, don't have to be married. Don't have to be married to each other..if you catch my drift...again.. their personal circumstances are nobody else's business.

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By *TinyDelight-Woman
2 weeks ago

City Centre

I think if you are enjoying fantastic sex with someone and you both realise something great is happening between you both, then these things can evolve into a very beneficial fab coupling.

If there are sexual scenarios you'd love to explore as a fab couple or attend socials or parties with, then why not with someone you trust and have a connection with? I'd only love to find that. However if it's just fucking and fucking with other people, you can keep it.

✨️

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. ...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males....

I think your definition of both the words "judgemental" and "couple" are both different to mine.

...single male = solo profile...its nobody's business what their personal circumstances are...couples profile a man and a woman usually, don't have to be married. Don't have to be married to each other..if you catch my drift...again.. their personal circumstances are nobody else's business. "

I disagree. If a married couple for example are meeting two other people they believe to be in the same boat as them, but are in fact two singles, then I think they should know so they can decide if that's ok with them or not. Just my opinion.

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. ...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males....

I think your definition of both the words "judgemental" and "couple" are both different to mine.

...single male = solo profile...its nobody's business what their personal circumstances are...couples profile a man and a woman usually, don't have to be married. Don't have to be married to each other..if you catch my drift...again.. their personal circumstances are nobody else's business.

I disagree. If a married couple for example are meeting two other people they believe to be in the same boat as them, but are in fact two singles, then I think they should know so they can decide if that's ok with them or not. Just my opinion."
...you actually ask couples if they are married to each other...?

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"

You seem to be reading the post and intention as cynically as possible though.

"

Not intentionally. It's just the way I read the situation of an unverified single guy offering protection. Things here might blossom into something wonderful, but just as likely he might drop her like a shitty stick as soon as he gets a go on someone else's wife.

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By *lueLotusWoman
2 weeks ago

the wilderness

For me it would have to be a fwb situation, someone I could tryst and feel safe with and who'd have my back at events, and I'd have theirs too.

Someone to get dressed up with/ travel with/ check in with each other at the event/ walk me back to my car/ share a hotel room/ the benefits are many if the friendship is solid.

I don't want to be in a couple but I'd love to team up with a friend like that for events.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. ...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males....

I think your definition of both the words "judgemental" and "couple" are both different to mine.

...single male = solo profile...its nobody's business what their personal circumstances are...couples profile a man and a woman usually, don't have to be married. Don't have to be married to each other..if you catch my drift...again.. their personal circumstances are nobody else's business.

I disagree. If a married couple for example are meeting two other people they believe to be in the same boat as them, but are in fact two singles, then I think they should know so they can decide if that's ok with them or not. Just my opinion....you actually ask couples if they are married to each other...?"

I have done in the past. I've also asked singles if they are really single or fab-single.

Generally though this would be if I had some suspicion. Most people I would trust to be up front about these things without having to be asked.

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By *he KakapoMan
2 weeks ago

A nice rock

Actually reading this can I just get the bit where someone pays half my hotel bill when I'm away?

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By *electableicecreamMan
2 weeks ago

The West


"For me it would have to be a fwb situation, someone I could tryst and feel safe with and who'd have my back at events, and I'd have theirs too.

Someone to get dressed up with/ travel with/ check in with each other at the event/ walk me back to my car/ share a hotel room/ the benefits are many if the friendship is solid.

I don't want to be in a couple but I'd love to team up with a friend like that for events. "

This. Sounds like the ideal scenario to me.

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster

Join the singles group.

I think you are seeking an ethically non monogamous relationship. Living the dream.

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By *he KakapoMan
2 weeks ago

A nice rock


"Join the singles group.

I think you are seeking an ethically non monogamous relationship. Living the dream. "

What he describes above is definitely not an ENM relationship

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. ...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males....

I think your definition of both the words "judgemental" and "couple" are both different to mine.

...single male = solo profile...its nobody's business what their personal circumstances are...couples profile a man and a woman usually, don't have to be married. Don't have to be married to each other..if you catch my drift...again.. their personal circumstances are nobody else's business.

I disagree. If a married couple for example are meeting two other people they believe to be in the same boat as them, but are in fact two singles, then I think they should know so they can decide if that's ok with them or not. Just my opinion....you actually ask couples if they are married to each other...?

I have done in the past. I've also asked singles if they are really single or fab-single.

Generally though this would be if I had some suspicion. Most people I would trust to be up front about these things without having to be asked."
...so many variables..what if a couple were married...but not to each other, what if a couple used to be married, then teamed up with someone else they met while swinging,?...do you think they should share that info with you?

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster

I can't be arsed reading the whole thread. Lazy out this morning. Sorry if I didn't pick up on all the info.

The amount of men that want to hang onto a single woman's coat tails; get into clubs, have a partner in crime, half the cost of everything. The reality is, it's cheaper for single women to remain single.

There is a bigger incentive for single men to couple up than for single women.

Any single woman, coupling up with a guy in order for him to get more access to the swinging world, is doing HIM a favour.

Groups of single women can look out for each other. Men aren't looking out for you while they are fucking someone else (and sharing the cost of the event with you).

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By *electableicecreamMan
2 weeks ago

The West


"I can't be arsed reading the whole thread. Lazy out this morning. Sorry if I didn't pick up on all the info.

The amount of men that want to hang onto a single woman's coat tails; get into clubs, have a partner in crime, half the cost of everything. The reality is, it's cheaper for single women to remain single.

There is a bigger incentive for single men to couple up than for single women.

Any single woman, coupling up with a guy in order for him to get more access to the swinging world, is doing HIM a favour.

Groups of single women can look out for each other. Men aren't looking out for you while they are fucking someone else (and sharing the cost of the event with you).

"

Maybe you should scroll up a bit. For sure your opinion is valid for you but there's some interesting and varying points of view above.

Speaking for myself, I am not and have no need to be riding anyone's coat tails and if I asked a woman to head out into the scene to have adventures it's because I like that person enough to want to share something with them.

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster

You are always a sweetie delectable, not everyone is as considerate as your goodself.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. ...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males....

I think your definition of both the words "judgemental" and "couple" are both different to mine.

...single male = solo profile...its nobody's business what their personal circumstances are...couples profile a man and a woman usually, don't have to be married. Don't have to be married to each other..if you catch my drift...again.. their personal circumstances are nobody else's business.

I disagree. If a married couple for example are meeting two other people they believe to be in the same boat as them, but are in fact two singles, then I think they should know so they can decide if that's ok with them or not. Just my opinion....you actually ask couples if they are married to each other...?

I have done in the past. I've also asked singles if they are really single or fab-single.

Generally though this would be if I had some suspicion. Most people I would trust to be up front about these things without having to be asked....so many variables..what if a couple were married...but not to each other, what if a couple used to be married, then teamed up with someone else they met while swinging,?...do you think they should share that info with you?"

I would anticipate in those scenarios they would bring it up themselves. Certainly when I was swinging with Laura when we were both in other proper relationships then we would always bring it up for the sake of openness and to give them a choice. I liked to say "yes I'm married, just not to her"

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster

I ld prefer people who are transparent about their relationship status. Courtesy helps to navigate the fab world. It's easy to spell it out on profiles.

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By *og-ManMan
2 weeks ago

somewhere

In connection with the guys on the woman's coatail to get into the clubs

Absolutely it's a great idea as single men get rode and not in a good way by some of the clubs having to pay €50 to get in and then put into a cage and hope to be picked to play

As against a friendly woman walking in with me I pay the €30 couples fee in and get 4 free drinks that I always split 2 each

My first year in PDI that's what I did and would do again if I went alone again

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. ...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males....

I think your definition of both the words "judgemental" and "couple" are both different to mine.

...single male = solo profile...its nobody's business what their personal circumstances are...couples profile a man and a woman usually, don't have to be married. Don't have to be married to each other..if you catch my drift...again.. their personal circumstances are nobody else's business.

I disagree. If a married couple for example are meeting two other people they believe to be in the same boat as them, but are in fact two singles, then I think they should know so they can decide if that's ok with them or not. Just my opinion....you actually ask couples if they are married to each other...?

I have done in the past. I've also asked singles if they are really single or fab-single.

Generally though this would be if I had some suspicion. Most people I would trust to be up front about these things without having to be asked....so many variables..what if a couple were married...but not to each other, what if a couple used to be married, then teamed up with someone else they met while swinging,?...do you think they should share that info with you?

I would anticipate in those scenarios they would bring it up themselves. Certainly when I was swinging with Laura when we were both in other proper relationships then we would always bring it up for the sake of openness and to give them a choice. I liked to say "yes I'm married, just not to her" "
...yet you don't mind judging others.. ?

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

Which particular judgement is it you are accusing me of? Can you try and be concise please.

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By *ionycusMan
2 weeks ago

Babylon

How about we change it up a little.

What if two bi guys , not a couple , decided to pair up to help fulfil some ladies fantasies. Is this not the same kind of thing , beneficial to all involved. Is it only fair if everyone gets equal benefits? This idea of fairness is only a social construct. Would that be an ethical question? What if they weren't really bi, but would just do it to get more women?

Would one of the bi guys have to offer protection for the other one? "here Jim, use this one , no latex and ribbed"

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster

I don't mind anyone walking in with me, if it doesn't impact upon me.

It's when they start:

Trying to dictate what club to go to (taking my preference out of it) that it becomes annoying.

Or frankly if you walk in with them one night, thinking you ll do it every night. I might like to walk in with someone else another night, or on my own.

Recently an American guy I know, asked me to couple up with him to go to a club, as there was a female half of another couple going to be there that he wanted to hook up with. At least he was honest about it, but no, I had no interest in that particular club, and didn't know the other couple at all. Nothing in it for me!

Women don't need swinger men for security in clubs, the clubs have security staff. This is not directed at you Bog-Man, I know you know the scene!Guys need to understand, they are not doing the single women any real favours by coupling up with them, if their aim is access to clubs or parties.

I find paying my own way is more straightforward. I ve walked in with guys and later been accused of using them for the entrance fee 🤣🤣🤣. It's €10 and 2 free drinks for a single woman! Or free.

Sometimes it's easier to paddle your own canoe, as they say.

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan

[Removed by poster at 02/12/24 12:19:05]

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Which particular judgement is it you are accusing me of? Can you try and be concise please."
...you're the one holding the moral high ground...you tell me

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"How about we change it up a little.

What if two bi guys , not a couple , decided to pair up to help fulfil some ladies fantasies. Is this not the same kind of thing , beneficial to all involved. Is it only fair if everyone gets equal benefits? This idea of fairness is only a social construct. Would that be an ethical question? What if they weren't really bi, but would just do it to get more women?

Would one of the bi guys have to offer protection for the other one? "here Jim, use this one , no latex and ribbed"

"

I would say that as long as these two bi guys are accurately representing themselves to their meets then there is zero issue

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. ...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males....

I think your definition of both the words "judgemental" and "couple" are both different to mine.

...single male = solo profile...its nobody's business what their personal circumstances are...couples profile a man and a woman usually, don't have to be married. Don't have to be married to each other..if you catch my drift...again.. their personal circumstances are nobody else's business.

I disagree. If a married couple for example are meeting two other people they believe to be in the same boat as them, but are in fact two singles, then I think they should know so they can decide if that's ok with them or not. Just my opinion....you actually ask couples if they are married to each other...?

I have done in the past. I've also asked singles if they are really single or fab-single.

Generally though this would be if I had some suspicion. Most people I would trust to be up front about these things without having to be asked....so many variables..what if a couple were married...but not to each other, what if a couple used to be married, then teamed up with someone else they met while swinging,?...do you think they should share that info with you?

I would anticipate in those scenarios they would bring it up themselves. Certainly when I was swinging with Laura when we were both in other proper relationships then we would always bring it up for the sake of openness and to give them a choice. I liked to say "yes I'm married, just not to her" ...yet you don't mind judging others.. ?"

Pot, kettle, black.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"Which particular judgement is it you are accusing me of? Can you try and be concise please....you're the one holding the moral high ground...you tell me "

I can't defend myself if you can't explain what it is I'm being accused of.

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By *ogladyWoman
2 weeks ago

The bog

I have on a number of occasions help single males who I have met by bringing them along to a social with me.. I always encourage them to mingle with other people and always agreed that if we're sharing a room that neither of us would bring anyone back to the room but if either of us wanted to play with someone we would go to there room or somewhere else.. I will continue to help single males that I get on with to get into the socials scene and I don't in anyway feel that they are hanging on my coat tails..

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster


"How about we change it up a little.

What if two bi guys , not a couple , decided to pair up to help fulfil some ladies fantasies. Is this not the same kind of thing , beneficial to all involved. Is it only fair if everyone gets equal benefits? This idea of fairness is only a social construct. Would that be an ethical question? What if they weren't really bi, but would just do it to get more women?

Would one of the bi guys have to offer protection for the other one? "here Jim, use this one , no latex and ribbed"

I would say that as long as these two bi guys are accurately representing themselves to their meets then there is zero issue"

If the bi guys are transparent with their intentions and desires, all good. Of course the woman has to actually share those desires as well.

As long as no one is taking one for the team, then it's all good.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

I would absolutely btw team up to save cash on a club or a hotel... But I wouldn't be presenting ourselves as a couple to potential meets in there without being clear on what we were as I feel people you're having sex with deserve to know the reality of the situation beforehand.

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By *he KakapoMan
2 weeks ago

A nice rock


"Which particular judgement is it you are accusing me of? Can you try and be concise please....you're the one holding the moral high ground...you tell me

I can't defend myself if you can't explain what it is I'm being accused of.

"

This has veered way off anything to do with the OP lads....

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By *og-ManMan
2 weeks ago

somewhere

There's a few couples that I've seen that are FB or FWB but have it in their couple's profile

They meet other couples and singles for sex

Be interesting if any of them wrote in here

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster

I was (briefly) part of a FWB couples profile.

It didn't work, because the guy wasn't prioritising me, as we weren't a real couple.

He was using the couples profile to get access to more women. He was pushing to meet people that I had no interest in. There was no value in it for me, so I took down my pics and stopped interacting with it.

The bio described accurately that we weren't a couple, just friends giving the couples profile a go.

Both people need to have the same agenda for it to work.

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"Which particular judgement is it you are accusing me of? Can you try and be concise please....you're the one holding the moral high ground...you tell me

I can't defend myself if you can't explain what it is I'm being accused of.

This has veered way off anything to do with the OP lads...."
...you're right...the op should be applauded for his honesty and ingenuity..

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster

FilthyNights thanks for your consistent honesty, you always share your opinion fairly. One of the most transparent, honest fabbers. 🥂🥂

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By *inky Bear and VicsCouple
2 weeks ago

Northern Ireland


"I ld prefer people who are transparent about their relationship status. Courtesy helps to navigate the fab world. It's easy to spell it out on profiles. "

If someone wasn't transparent about their relationship status, then that's a red flag because they might be cheating and that's total turn off. An established couple would, I would guess, prefer another established couple so there's understanding, respect for dynamics and a reduction in drama.

The justification for cheating on this thread is the usual yadda yadda. Nobody else's business? Yes it is. It's the people who you are planning to swing with, they'll want to know. They choose to be ok with it, but they should still know.

It's also the business of some poor unwitting partner who thinks their loyal and faithful loved one is the bees knees and has no idea they are being exposed to STIs as well.

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"If you think all men wth single male profiles are actually single males then you are completely deluded. ...I was talking about both your posts....couples and single males....

I think your definition of both the words "judgemental" and "couple" are both different to mine.

...single male = solo profile...its nobody's business what their personal circumstances are...couples profile a man and a woman usually, don't have to be married. Don't have to be married to each other..if you catch my drift...again.. their personal circumstances are nobody else's business.

I disagree. If a married couple for example are meeting two other people they believe to be in the same boat as them, but are in fact two singles, then I think they should know so they can decide if that's ok with them or not. Just my opinion....you actually ask couples if they are married to each other...?

I have done in the past. I've also asked singles if they are really single or fab-single.

Generally though this would be if I had some suspicion. Most people I would trust to be up front about these things without having to be asked....so many variables..what if a couple were married...but not to each other, what if a couple used to be married, then teamed up with someone else they met while swinging,?...do you think they should share that info with you?

I would anticipate in those scenarios they would bring it up themselves. Certainly when I was swinging with Laura when we were both in other proper relationships then we would always bring it up for the sake of openness and to give them a choice. I liked to say "yes I'm married, just not to her" ...yet you don't mind judging others.. ?

Pot, kettle, black. "
...what do you mean.?⁸..I wasn't married and swinging with someone else...you seem confused?

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster

I m not confused, you seem to leap to very odd conclusions.

You are accusing someone of being judgmental whilst repeatedly judging yourself. You seem hypocritical and facetious.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

(For anyone unsure, what I describe above was done with full knowledge and support from my wife at the time and I did not cheat on her)

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By *amanthaJones_LetsPlayWoman
2 weeks ago

borderarea

OP great post - absolutely nothing wrong with two singles joining up - seen it several times.

Unfortunately your post became a victim of 'advice' - hopefully you find what you are looking for - you do fab your way. Personally have a singles profile only but in a relationship with another fabsters - there's no right or wrong way to do profiles once everyone is honest and upfront and allows for preferences and boundaries.

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By *ot really famousMan
2 weeks ago

monaghan


"I m not confused, you seem to leap to very odd conclusions.

You are accusing someone of being judgmental whilst repeatedly judging yourself. You seem hypocritical and facetious. "
...I didn't start the judging ..but congratulations o reading the whole thread

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By *chochamberWoman
2 weeks ago

Munster


"I m not confused, you seem to leap to very odd conclusions.

You are accusing someone of being judgmental whilst repeatedly judging yourself. You seem hypocritical and facetious. ...I didn't start the judging ..but congratulations o reading the whole thread "

You are really revealing your true self aren't you. Good luck with that.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
2 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"I m not confused, you seem to leap to very odd conclusions.

You are accusing someone of being judgmental whilst repeatedly judging yourself. You seem hypocritical and facetious. ...I didn't start the judging ..but congratulations o reading the whole thread "

Can we just put these vague judgement claims to bed please. It's gone on long enough. All I see here is generally reasonable debate and varied opinion. It's ok to think differently without throwing accusations around.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
2 weeks ago

O o O oo

If people are not interested in the request then please leave the thread alone.

To the OP, if you start another thread I will make sure it doesn't get spoiled.

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