FabSwingers.com forum: Weight loss and body confidence

By *adylace OP Woman
15 weeks ago

Waterford City

I just wanted to see if anybody else has had the same issues as me. I have been doing the weight loss thing for the past few months for health reasons but I find that it's actually killing my body confidence as I go. It took me an awful long time to accept and love my plus size body and now I find that as I'm losing the weight I really dislike the changes. I haven't put up new pics in a long time because of this. Any tips to help change my mindset?

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By *omebirdWoman
15 weeks ago

I'm so sorry to hear this. You're undoing many years of conditioning as you lose weight, despite it being for health reasons. Maybe counselling along side could be an option?

Personally, I've never been comfortable in my body at any size and I think it's amazing that you worked on that for yourself.. Feel free to PM any time.. I'd have some book recs too. Mind yourself x

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By *ayray22Man
15 weeks ago

lucan

Try the carnivore diet, if lost 2.5 stone so far this year.

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By (user no longer on site)
15 weeks ago

Homebirds advice to talk to someone is good advice in my opinion. You don’t have to go it alone. It has to be difficult if you’ve already loved who you are, and I’m sure you will be able to love the changes it may just take a little time.

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By *eeking_sensuality77Woman
15 weeks ago

Athlone

Isn't it amazing how the mind works?

As a very overweight woman myself, I have never been confident or accepting of my body. I struggle to accept myself as I am yet I'm struggling to find the strength to make the changes I so badly need to make for my health and wellbeing.

Anwyay, I hope you come to a place where you accept and love the changes that are happening and embrace the new you!

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By *he KakapoMan
15 weeks ago

A nice rock

"Try the carnivore diet, if lost 2.5 stone so far this year. "

Did they fly right over your head by any chance?

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By *arbieandbaldyCouple
15 weeks ago

Dublin, Liverpool

"Try the carnivore diet, if lost 2.5 stone so far this year. "

I do this when I'm cutting for holidays for a month. Plus I fast once a week for 24hrs. Great little rest for the body.

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By *affa31Woman
15 weeks ago

Galway

"I just wanted to see if anybody else has had the same issues as me. I have been doing the weight loss thing for the past few months for health reasons but I find that it's actually killing my body confidence as I go. It took me an awful long time to accept and love my plus size body and now I find that as I'm losing the weight I really dislike the changes. I haven't put up new pics in a long time because of this. Any tips to help change my mindset?"

Easier said than done but remember that your body deserves love and respect no matter its size. Losing weight is going to come with its own challenges regarding loose skin etc but it’s still the same body that you can learn to love as much as you loved your bigger body.

Don’t be hard on yourself, change is always hard.

I would say, since you used to like taking pics, buy some new lingerie and have a photoshoot for yourself, even if you don’t post the pics.

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By *arbieandbaldyCouple
15 weeks ago

Dublin, Liverpool

Well the first thing I will say to you is well done on taking the step to train and to stay at it. That's a massive achievement in itself. Most people quit after a few weeks and fall back into the bad habits. You've shown that you have the willpower to keep training, so maybe this just needs a little tweak to help with your confidence. Maybe speak to someone professionally is the best thing to do.

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By *heelofTimeCouple
15 weeks ago

Two Rivers

[Removed by poster at 01/08/24 16:00:02]

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By *heelofTimeCouple
15 weeks ago

Two Rivers

It sounds like you’re at the start of your journey our skin elasticity doesn’t shrink as quick as weight loss resulting in some changes you may be referring to, especially if you are loosing the weight quickly 1-2lbs per week. The loose skin won’t fully go nor will the stretch marks. The skin will get smaller in time and stretch marks will fade. Weight training can help with the loose skin if this is what may be a concern to you!

Keep up your weight loss journey and congratulations on losing the weight as a lady who fluctuates between being bigger and smaller I know it’s tough to loose weight and takes a lot of will power to change habits…… So kudos to you!

Don’t worry about the changes you are seeing your overall health is more important. You will learn to love your new body overtime and the skin does decrease but will always be a bit of loose skin left…… this can be turned into muscle! Also you can be overweight and solid muscle and have a good resting heart rate (through cardio exercises) , BMI isn’t the only indicator of heart health x

As someone mentioned above talk to others who are in a similar stage of their journey or who have gone through it before, they can help you with your concerns xxxxx

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By *expitCouple
15 weeks ago

cork

Im the opposite then .i lost nearly 4 stone and i still see myself as that person before weight loss .

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By *onyFerJane2020Couple
15 weeks ago

Fermanagh, Ireland

Hi _adylace, Tony here and I'm in the same position as your self. Trying to lose weight and as a couple on here get message from couples saying they only want to meet wife ( Jane..Naughty Milf) and it really affects the confidence

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By *lkStallion92Man
15 weeks ago

Cork Munster Shannon Dublin

Hi _adylace, hope your keeping well. Fair play to you finding the confidence to even speak out about it. Doing that alone shows how much you really want this journey to be successful for ya and trust in the work you've already put in already and trust the process. If I could recommend adding a bit of moderate workouts to your meal plans, 3-4 days of good moderate sweat pouring exercises are absolutely good for the and brain needs those exercises gives you great dopamine and makes you want to get up and kick that challenge butt the next day. If there's anything I could do for you in this situation pls feel free to Private mail me and there's plenty of help from like-minded people who I believe could help aswel. Always self-love is key. Do it for you, not for people's impressions, well-done and fair play to you for finding the courage to want to take that life changing step from thee beginning 😊

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By *lkStallion92Man
15 weeks ago

Cork Munster Shannon Dublin

"Hi _adylace, Tony here and I'm in the same position as your self. Trying to lose weight and as a couple on here get message from couples saying they only want to meet wife ( Jane..Naughty Milf) and it really affects the confidence

Don't mind them tony, from a gent to another gent, Carb and sugar is everymans weakness at some stage. If you cut down a bit on your carb and sugar intake, get out there with the misus now and again for a good walk or if you can find the type drop into any fitness center and get some laps done swimming or even any cardio machines. Something moderate you can get into an habit of doing and I promise you in 2-3months time, you'll be a changed man physique-wise.

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By *hinbutlong1Man
15 weeks ago

Trim

Trust the process 🙏 it's not supposed to be easy stick with it!!

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By *iamo69Man
15 weeks ago

South

Just keep at it..will have its ups and downs.

But in couple months time you will be couple months past where you were and couple months after that the same

Confidence is all in the head.bet you if you post new pics you will be unendated with fabs and likes

I don't know a person alive that's 100percent secure in the body they have.always something they would want different.

Post the pics when you are ready and maybe that will boost your confidence 👍

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By *inky Bear and VicsCouple
15 weeks ago

Northern Ireland

As someone mentioned above talk to others who are in a similar stage of their journey or who have gone through it before, they can help you with your concerns xxxxx"

I enjoyed your perspective on heart health and agree

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By *inky Bear and VicsCouple
15 weeks ago

Northern Ireland

For years I hated how I looked as a plus size person and I didn't date or seek out any connections because of my lack of confidence. I was totally celibate for 15 years after an unexpected widowhood. I thought nobody wanted to touch me as I am so gross.

I got fed up with lack of human interaction and joined Fet last summer having always been kinky and high libido. And on Fet there is so much body positive plus size content. Gorgeous plump bodies with navels you could drink out of, curves and rolls and big delicious boobs and bums. I also attracted the attention of people who liked my body shape and I started to feel good about myself. I an not fully confident but I now have a relationship with another kinkster met through the scene and last night I tried on all my lingerie for an upcoming event. In between outfits I'm stripping down to nothing and it's so cute that if my big dimpled ass was within reaching distance I got a grope or pat. He thinks I'm gorgeous. I agree with him lol.

So, ironically I had a minor health procedure to do and the docs are going sorry we can't do it because of your BMI. So now I have to lose about 2 stone. And I'm sitting there but I don't want to lose my boobs!

I always say I am a healthy as a trout. My blood pressure is so average the nurses always look at ach other as if to say really? Is our monitor broken? I have obesity and I know that it's bad for me so it does need dealt with but I have to say I will always want to be a plump plus size squishy sexy person...just maybe a little less squishy

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By *adylace OP Woman
15 weeks ago

Waterford City

Hi everyone. Thanks for the responses. I'm not sure I explained myself correctly. The weight loss is going well thankfully and I plan on sticking to it. I was more looking for tips to change my mindset on the changes in my body but thanks to everyone that messaged here and privately. You have all been very kind. xx

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By *om TangoMan
15 weeks ago

aughnacloy monaghan area

When I used to feel shit about myself and no confidence I used to do meditation. Great way to get into your own body and mind. 10 mins in the morning and 10 minutes at night did wonders for me. I still do the 20 seconds meditation when my head starts to run off with itself. I swear by it

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By * la carteCouple
15 weeks ago

Dublin

I have no experience of your situation but very interested in the topic.

Fair play to you for taking a step to what I understand to be you wanting to improve your physical health.

You say that you are happy with your plus size body.

If you are addressing weight through dietary changes - restricting foods or food groups, eating different foods, eating less etc - then I do wonder if your body confidence is taking a knock because your body may actually be releasing less dopamine, which is a feel good neurotransmitter released during pleasurable experiences like eating, sex etc. Less neurotransmitter = less happiness, less confidence.

If this is the case, there are many healthy ways to increase the release of dopamine, like exercise, meditation, getting back to nature etc.

Maybe a medical professional, a nutritionist and/or mental health professional might have more insight and be able to give pointers and help.

I wish you all the best on your journey.

Mrs

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By *elloMarylouWoman
15 weeks ago

mayo

Well done on weight loss

I think this is one of the areas where most quick fix diets etc fail to address.

I remember reading a book by 2 English women who discussed this and as one lady said her weight was her security blanket, sge was always known as the bubbly, jolly person. It was part of her identity. Like a big safety, blanket around her.

I've lost 2 stone but yet still put myself down and call myself the fat funny friend. It's a mindset that needs to be worked on.

Thers a brill book by Florence Given called women don't owe you pretty. Check it out. I listened to it on audible and ended up buying the hard copy. ( note to self must read it again)

I've often wondered if I lose the weight will I find something else I dislike about myself. Or will people not see me as the fat funny one.

Way I see it, losing weight and getting healthy will make life better, but the work comes with the mind. Work on that and it will fall into place.

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By *arrot_in_a_boxCouple
15 weeks ago

kinda dublin

As someone who yo-yos up and down every couple of years, I find nothing is better for your confidence than buying a new set of clothes that fits your new shape better.

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By *ay19_82Man
14 weeks ago

Southern

Great job on the journey so far!

It really is about finding the right balance of coach / therapist, and I would highly recommend both.

In my experience, we often underestimate the impact the mindset can have, or the positive benefits of working on our mind with help from a professional.

Good luck with everything!

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By *adylace OP Woman
14 weeks ago

Waterford City

Thanks very much for all of the comments. Some very good points have been made and I definitely think the Dopamine could be an issue for me. I will also look up that book that was suggested. Thanks again.

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By *ereus3Couple
14 weeks ago

Dundalk

"Thanks very much for all of the comments. Some very good points have been made and I definitely think the Dopamine could be an issue for me. I will also look up that book that was suggested. Thanks again."
well done on the weight loss. Weight bearing exercise will help the body changes more than just cardio. And to keep the weight loss can I suggest slimbiome medical on Amazon. Scientifically proven to suppress appetite.

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By *nkedBiGuyMan
14 weeks ago

Armagh

"Hi everyone. Thanks for the responses. I'm not sure I explained myself correctly. The weight loss is going well thankfully and I plan on sticking to it. I was more looking for tips to change my mindset on the changes in my body but thanks to everyone that messaged here and privately. You have all been very kind. xx"

Just tey and remember it's a woman's confidence that is sexy. Just know that your beautiful, tell yourself every single day! No matter what's going on or how your feeling always find a reason to tell yourself this. Your on a journey and it's not easy, cha ge is hard, but stay positive and remind yourself your beautiful x

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By *irdyxWoman
14 weeks ago

dublin/ Birmingham

I have lost around 9st over the last few years and actively hate my body now my ass fell into the back of my legs my boob's are sliding off my chest . I've decided I'm going to go for a mummy make over in Lithuania fingers crossed will be next year in hopes once the mum tum has gone I'll start loving my body again .

You my lovely are a beautiful person.

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