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"Not condemning or condoning you OP. Understandably you feel guilty for cheating on your partner. You say the reason for your post is to confess and explain why 'people like you' come on here and tell lies to get meets. Fair dues. I'm wondering what else might be the reason(s)? Is it to apologise to someone you slept with and who has blocked you now ? Is it to try to meet them again ? Do you plan on continue sleeping with people outside your relationship ? or have you sated your feeling of missing out now ? I ask these questions to better understand 'people like you' as you yourself put it. BTW, I don't judge you because non of us are perfect moral pillars, possibly not even those that will likely jump on the condemnation bandwagon when it rocks up here. " These are probably the actual reasons | |||
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"I admire your honesty on here and for accepting that lying causes enormous hurt. No one can judge you but yourself and your actions. Many are in unfulfilled relationships, afraid to discuss their needs. Open discussion can however make or break a situation. There is no one here than has the right to judge. That is yours alone. " People do have the right to judge. Some guy messaged me about him getting a dog to do a sex act on his ex girlfriend - animal abuse!! Judgey pantses are being hoiked up. Cheating/calculated dishonesty and ghosting are also grounds for judgment. Not equivalent to animal abuse but also grounds for judgment. There is no blanket rule that no one is allowed judge. Everyone judges, it has its place. If there was no judgment, there would be anarchy. People understand relationships are nuanced, libidos and interests differ - still doesnt mean it's OK to lie to or use other people. Anyway, it's all irrelevant, cheaters always get found out and judgments follow. | |||
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"What you ll have now is all these single guys beating up in you, which they think will earn them brownie points making you look bad and them look good. Cant see that working." Did you read the thread? | |||
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"What you ll have now is all these single guys beating up in you, which they think will earn them brownie points making you look bad and them look good. Cant see that working. Did you read the thread? I did. I admire his honesty and detect genuine remorse. I just genrrally on this site the see a rush from these fools potificating at these type of posts on moral values on a swingers site hoping to win some brownie points and maybe a get a ride out of it. I find it hilarious " | |||
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"What you ll have now is all these single guys beating up in you, which they think will earn them brownie points making you look bad and them look good. Cant see that working. Did you read the thread? I did. I admire his honesty and detect genuine remorse. I just genrrally on this site the see a rush from these fools potificating at these type of posts on moral values on a swingers site hoping to win some brownie points and maybe a get a ride out of it. I find it hilarious " Ok, but the phenomenon you're describing didn't actually happen in the responses in this thread right? And you found that hilarious? | |||
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"What you ll have now is all these single guys beating up in you, which they think will earn them brownie points making you look bad and them look good. Cant see that working. Did you read the thread? I did. I admire his honesty and detect genuine remorse. I just genrrally on this site the see a rush from these fools potificating at these type of posts on moral values on a swingers site hoping to win some brownie points and maybe a get a ride out of it. I find it hilarious Ok, but the phenomenon you're describing didn't actually happen in the responses in this thread right? And you found that hilarious? " What does protificating mean?? There are affairs sites for people wanting unethical non monogamous connections. Swinging can be ethical, this guy is forcing his lack of ethics on others, that's the issue. The big "confession", is not necessary. He could redirect that energy into having an honest discussion with his partner, and being honest with fab people. What was the real goal of the confession? (I m a good, decent, cheat.....) I m not buying it. The big reveal - his reasons for cheating are pretty lame. | |||
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"What you ll have now is all these single guys beating up in you, which they think will earn them brownie points making you look bad and them look good. Cant see that working. Did you read the thread? I did. I admire his honesty and detect genuine remorse. I just genrrally on this site the see a rush from these fools potificating at these type of posts on moral values on a swingers site hoping to win some brownie points and maybe a get a ride out of it. I find it hilarious Ok, but the phenomenon you're describing didn't actually happen in the responses in this thread right? And you found that hilarious? What does protificating mean?? There are affairs sites for people wanting unethical non monogamous connections. Swinging can be ethical, this guy is forcing his lack of ethics on others, that's the issue. The big "confession", is not necessary. He could redirect that energy into having an honest discussion with his partner, and being honest with fab people. What was the real goal of the confession? (I m a good, decent, cheat.....) I m not buying it. The big reveal - his reasons for cheating are pretty lame. " Presume they meant "pontificating" | |||
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"Alright, here goes I’m treating this like a confession. I’m pretty sure ur reactions will be super negative so I won’t dress it up:- I’m the worst kind of person. The one you all hate and want nothing to do with. I’ve used this site to cheat. I’ve lied to people in rl and on here to make it happen. At first it was tough. Both personally and with the site itself. Single guys don’t get anywhere fast as everyone knows. But then I figured out a way of doing things and it worked. I’ve had quite a few encounters. They’ve been fun and eye-opening. I’ve got a lot out of it I don’t say any of this as a humble brag. I’m actually really sad. So I should be you say,, and ashamed. I know! So, why did I do it? The main reason was validation. I’m attractive enough, with a strong body that gets some attention. I’m getting older, and I wanted to make the most of it and let others enjoy it too. The second reason was experience. There were things I hadn’t tried, like threesomes. Now I have. Then there was curiosity. I wondered if I was missing out on something better than my usual experiences. My partner would be devastated if she knew. This is all completely off her radar. I do regret that a lot but I also felt a strong need to do it. That won out. That doesn’t make it right, I know, but it was what happened. I’ve been careful with sexual health, using protection and getting tested. Again, I know that doesn’t make it okay, just a little less risky. Unfortunately and this is the really sad part I’ve met some really nice people. People I’d love to stay connected with but I can’t because I wasn’t honest at any point to anyone. I’ve hurt people too unintentionally leading them on at times and ghosting when I couldn’t keep up the lie. I’m sharing this to give a glimpse of the other side, to show you what people like me are thinking. I know it’s hard to understand why someone would do something so awful. " | |||
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"Not condemning or condoning you OP. Understandably you feel guilty for cheating on your partner. You say the reason for your post is to confess and explain why 'people like you' come on here and tell lies to get meets. Fair dues. I'm wondering what else might be the reason(s)? Is it to apologise to someone you slept with and who has blocked you now ? Is it to try to meet them again ? Do you plan on continue sleeping with people outside your relationship ? or have you sated your feeling of missing out now ? I ask these questions to better understand 'people like you' as you yourself put it. BTW, I don't judge you because non of us are perfect moral pillars, possibly not even those that will likely jump on the condemnation bandwagon when it rocks up here. " The key thing is that what I’m doing isn’t sustainable because it’s been based on deception and I will need to sign off. I’m not sated because you just end up wanting more and more. Definitely how it’s gone for me. But if I can’t change home life will have to change this. I thought it would useful give the story of why I started before a delete. | |||
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"Not condemning or condoning you OP. Understandably you feel guilty for cheating on your partner. You say the reason for your post is to confess and explain why 'people like you' come on here and tell lies to get meets. Fair dues. I'm wondering what else might be the reason(s)? Is it to apologise to someone you slept with and who has blocked you now ? Is it to try to meet them again ? Do you plan on continue sleeping with people outside your relationship ? or have you sated your feeling of missing out now ? I ask these questions to better understand 'people like you' as you yourself put it. BTW, I don't judge you because non of us are perfect moral pillars, possibly not even those that will likely jump on the condemnation bandwagon when it rocks up here. The key thing is that what I’m doing isn’t sustainable because it’s been based on deception and I will need to sign off. I’m not sated because you just end up wanting more and more. Definitely how it’s gone for me. But if I can’t change home life will have to change this. I thought it would useful give the story of why I started before a delete." You sound like you are very self aware of your motivations and your challenges on this OP. Seems as though you are the kind of person that would take maximum benefit from some counselling. In the meantime I would mull over these questions. Are / could you and your partner ( become) sexually compatible? Is variety of partners or fulfilling sex the big kick for you? Are you more naturally drawn to polyamory or monogamy? All the best OP and hope you can achieve a more congruent self in the future. | |||
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"You are self absorbed. Plenty of people wind down relationships that aren't sufficiently fulfilling.I ve lived through the fall out of seperating, the judgment, the financial stress, the single/co parenting. When attached people try to drag unsuspecting people into their lies it pisses me off, and for you to describe (while in hiding) why your selfish choices are justified, well it's pretty galling. If you want to only think of yourself, then be single. If you want an open relationship, discuss that with your significant other. Your cheating affects more people than yourself. You are choosing to disrespect everyone you lie to. You use people, nasty. " Spot on . Posters saying fair play for the honesty etc...seriously? It's almost a form of virtue signalling but for yourself. | |||
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"I don't consider what I do cheating. Me and my other half had a talk a while back about this, and we have a don't ask don't tell situation going. She knows our sex drives don't match, and has no problem with me going for a "massage". If I were getting attention at home, I wouldn't be on here. That being said, I would consider not telling my new encounter I was married as cheating. Does that make sense? " Maybe to you it makes sense , to me it smacks of total bullshit . This is a swingers site , it's hardly a stretch to tell a "new encounter " ( wtf is a new encounter..says a lot about how you view people on here , a notch on your belt ? ) ...that you're married or attached . | |||
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"I don't consider what I do cheating. Me and my other half had a talk a while back about this, and we have a don't ask don't tell situation going. She knows our sex drives don't match, and has no problem with me going for a "massage". If I were getting attention at home, I wouldn't be on here. That being said, I would consider not telling my new encounter I was married as cheating. Does that make sense? Maybe to you it makes sense , to me it smacks of total bullshit . This is a swingers site , it's hardly a stretch to tell a "new encounter " ( wtf is a new encounter..says a lot about how you view people on here , a notch on your belt ? ) ...that you're married or attached . " I have no shits to give. My cards are on the table, I put it in my profile. Nobody forcing anyone to act against their nature. How feel about it is your cross to bear. I put it in my profile, as I saw many profiles with "no married or attached". I also point it out if I chat to someone, and they have that on their profile. I'm polite to everyone, and respect their boundaries. If that isn't enough, I refer you to the first sentence of this post. Peace ?? (Fuck I'm bad at posting shit with my phone ..fat fingers, I guess) | |||
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"My wife just doesn't make an effort anymore " Aw shucks. I'm so sorry that you're the sole parent, doing all the laundry, cooking, dishes, house cleaning, yard work all on your own, I'm so sorry that you have the mental load of planning all family meals, remembering all the appointments and birthdays all on your own too, so very sorry that you work full time on top of that as well! It ain't easy being you. That pesky wife should know better than not put out for such hard worker | |||
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"My wife just doesn't make an effort anymore Aw shucks. I'm so sorry that you're the sole parent, doing all the laundry, cooking, dishes, house cleaning, yard work all on your own, I'm so sorry that you have the mental load of planning all family meals, remembering all the appointments and birthdays all on your own too, so very sorry that you work full time on top of that as well! It ain't easy being you. That pesky wife should know better than not put out for such hard worker" Laundry fair enough wife does it Cooking- air fryer Cleaning - only a small house Dishes - dish washer, dryer Yard work- I pay someone Planning meals- has an app Appointments/birthdays- phone calendar I know you'd think she'd put out more really | |||
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"My wife just doesn't make an effort anymore Aw shucks. I'm so sorry that you're the sole parent, doing all the laundry, cooking, dishes, house cleaning, yard work all on your own, I'm so sorry that you have the mental load of planning all family meals, remembering all the appointments and birthdays all on your own too, so very sorry that you work full time on top of that as well! It ain't easy being you. That pesky wife should know better than not put out for such hard worker Laundry fair enough wife does it Cooking- air fryer Cleaning - only a small house Dishes - dish washer, dryer Yard work- I pay someone Planning meals- has an app Appointments/birthdays- phone calendar I know you'd think she'd put out more really " I noticed you didn't mention kids at all. Is there any that you're purposely leaving out? Do you both only eat air fryer meals every day? Who loads and unloads the dishwasher? A small house still needs cleaned. Who cleans it? Does she work full time same as you? Does the app also do the shopping, puts it away, organizes cabinets? (If yes, what is it called, I want one of those too lol ) Does the phone calendar auto uploads all family birthdays, buys presents and cards, wraps them and delivers them too? | |||
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"My wife just doesn't make an effort anymore Aw shucks. I'm so sorry that you're the sole parent, doing all the laundry, cooking, dishes, house cleaning, yard work all on your own, I'm so sorry that you have the mental load of planning all family meals, remembering all the appointments and birthdays all on your own too, so very sorry that you work full time on top of that as well! It ain't easy being you. That pesky wife should know better than not put out for such hard worker Laundry fair enough wife does it Cooking- air fryer Cleaning - only a small house Dishes - dish washer, dryer Yard work- I pay someone Planning meals- has an app Appointments/birthdays- phone calendar I know you'd think she'd put out more really I noticed you didn't mention kids at all. Is there any that you're purposely leaving out? Do you both only eat air fryer meals every day? Who loads and unloads the dishwasher? A small house still needs cleaned. Who cleans it? Does she work full time same as you? Does the app also do the shopping, puts it away, organizes cabinets? (If yes, what is it called, I want one of those too lol ) Does the phone calendar auto uploads all family birthdays, buys presents and cards, wraps them and delivers them too? " No she works part time 2 kids all, I work nights in a factory 12 hour shifts She still has time to call her friend in the evening and got out to dinner with her friends on weekends while I have the kids all I'm saying is not that much effort in putting on a nice out fit some sexy underwear once a month to make the effort in which she doesn't hence why I like chatting and looking at women here who do make that effort | |||
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"Maybe your wife is here unknown to you trust me it has happened." That would make for an interesting coffee meet | |||
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"Maybe your wife is here unknown to you trust me it has happened. That would make for an interesting coffee meet " You bet...lol | |||
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"Maybe your wife is here unknown to you trust me it has happened." I wish | |||
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"Maybe your wife is here unknown to you trust me it has happened. That would make for an interesting coffee meet You bet...lol" Do you think they’d need something stronger in their coffee | |||
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