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Advice - Good or Bad

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By *electableicecream OP   Man
46 weeks ago

The West

I've read more than once in other sections of the forum here that giving advice to people (men) who ask for advice on their profiles is a bad move.

The idea being that a bad profile is a filter in itself and helping spruce thing's up might cause salient information to get removed. For example a guy might write 'will play safe if asked'. And that's a clue that might get covered over.

Another arguement I've read against giving advice on profiles is the risk that they all start to look the same because they are using the same formula. I.e Who you are, what your looking for and what you can bring to the table.

Arguements in favour of giggling advice include 'Some people do actually need help. 'Not everyone is great at writing or researching' and Photography is hard.

Is giving people advice on their profiles a good thing or a bad thing?

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By *og-ManMan
46 weeks ago

somewhere

I used to until I read what 2 very wise female fabbers wrote

The first wrote that its good to see the real person behind the profile and what they really think so its an extra filter

The second wasn't as subtle and she wrote that if a man couldn't figure out what to do on here he was probably crap in bed

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By *electableicecream OP   Man
46 weeks ago

The West

Obviously I didn't mean to write 'giggling advice'

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
46 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"I used to until I read what 2 very wise female fabbers wrote

The first wrote that its good to see the real person behind the profile and what they really think so its an extra filter

The second wasn't as subtle and she wrote that if a man couldn't figure out what to do on here he was probably crap in bed "

I'm sure those are accurate in some cases... But I'm also sure there are men who are poor written communicators, but are epic fucks

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By *og-ManMan
46 weeks ago

somewhere


"Obviously I didn't mean to write 'giggling advice' "

Sure just tickle her until she pee's with laughter

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
46 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"Obviously I didn't mean to write 'giggling advice'

Sure just tickle her until she pee's with laughter "

Squirts you mean?

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By *inky BBWWoman
46 weeks ago

Somewhere

I feel that how a person presents themselves is very telling, and it is definitely a filter for me. On saying that, some people have genuine struggles with literacy so I might make an exception in a case like that if someone asked for help, but it would be minimal.

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By (user no longer on site)
46 weeks ago


"Obviously I didn't mean to write 'giggling advice'

Sure just tickle her until she pee's with laughter

Squirts you mean? "

I'm no Squiter .. I'm from Dub,12 I'm to mean to waste a drop ..

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By *rRiosMan
46 weeks ago

dublin

I asked two people privately about my profile when I first joined fab based on forum interactions. My profile has changed a bit since then, appreciated their advice though. Not sure I would want to do so publicly.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 07/01/24 00:30:12]

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

(Had to correct the atrocious grammar and spelling )

It's a bit of a catch 22, if you help, you could give advice to an unsavoury character but if you don't help, ladies/couples miss out on a decent guy.....but as Tony would say "what ya gonna do!?"

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By *irArdMan
45 weeks ago

Rush

Fair play, good that you bring this up.

It may be difficult for some men or women to put themselves forward for an encounter. We are all different, yet all equal.

:0)

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By *orYourThighsOnlyMan
45 weeks ago

Midlands


"I've read more than once in other sections of the forum here that giving advice to people (men) who ask for advice on their profiles is a bad move.

The idea being that a bad profile is a filter in itself and helping spruce thing's up might cause salient information to get removed. For example a guy might write 'will play safe if asked'. And that's a clue that might get covered over.

Another arguement I've read against giving advice on profiles is the risk that they all start to look the same because they are using the same formula. I.e Who you are, what your looking for and what you can bring to the table.

Arguements in favour of giggling advice include 'Some people do actually need help. 'Not everyone is great at writing or researching' and Photography is hard.

Is giving people advice on their profiles a good thing or a bad thing?"

It’s a good thing. I read some great advice from your post helping others, bogman, etc etc and my friends on here and Kik groups. It’s all helpful.

I had a trip up north here and the advice I got from the Kik group kept me sane, safe and some great advises on where to go etc and got to meet up with new fab friends and toured some superb pubs etc. much obliged

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By *lueLotusWoman
45 weeks ago

the wilderness


"I've read more than once in other sections of the forum here that giving advice to people (men) who ask for advice on their profiles is a bad move.

The idea being that a bad profile is a filter in itself and helping spruce thing's up might cause salient information to get removed. For example a guy might write 'will play safe if asked'. And that's a clue that might get covered over.

Another arguement I've read against giving advice on profiles is the risk that they all start to look the same because they are using the same formula. I.e Who you are, what your looking for and what you can bring to the table.

Arguements in favour of giggling advice include 'Some people do actually need help. 'Not everyone is great at writing or researching' and Photography is hard.

Is giving people advice on their profiles a good thing or a bad thing?"

I think if ppl ask for advice it's a good thing, that alone means they are hopefully open to growth.

On another note, out of pure inexperience on here I took a chance and met with someone with a dodgy profile and after chatting a bit and even having an argument with him on chat I met with him and he was/is an absolute gem of a guy and an amazing ride too

This didn't work so well on another occasion. Was fine no harm done but nothing doing.

So I try to keep an open mind with no regrets if it goes tits up.

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By *easingTimMan
45 weeks ago

Loughlinstown

Would give general pointers like..

-Have a profile pic that's not of your cock

- Fill out your profile and avoid "genuine" or "nice" to describe yourself

- when sending messages, be quirky, cheeky honest but at the very least, be interesting

... but wouldn't give too much detailed advice as most lads would start a cut and paste formulaic approach to operating on the site and no one wins there

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By *ealitybitesMan
45 weeks ago

Belfast

I used to offer advice but haven't done so since 3 fabbers decided to copy and paste my entire bio as their own and one of them attached my pics to their messages which apparently were very unsavoury.

Even after being reported and pulled up on it they continued to post in the forums every day and ironically offered advice to profiles who hadn't been here for years like themselves.

I now fall into the camp of not offering advice and helping anyone put together a boxticking profile that is a mish mash of forum suggestions.

On the other hand though I find it hilarious that while it is almost always single men asking for advice, many of those women and couples telling them how to improve are guilty of all the same things.

One line bios, poor selection of pics, one word messages, can't take rejection etc etc.

Of course they will get messages regardless but they don't really have a leg to stand on if the quality of those messages isn't what they expect or the people behind them have poor communication skills.

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By *ustBoWoman
45 weeks ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I don't give advice anymore for several reasons the main ones being usually those who post those threads never pay any attention anyhow and ignore the advice given. And two I prefer to see the person as they are rather than a sanitised profile that's done just to please others. It's a good filter for me.

The excuse that they don't know what to write when all they have is fill me later,ask me anything ,looking for fun as their entire bio is just that an excuse. The same with no pics or just graphic pics. It's a good and handy filter to me. They are grown adults who should have at least some idea what would appeal to those they are looking for on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

The profile is a good indicator of a person, and leave them to describe themselves as they wish. Their forum posts (if any) are a goldmine of info. Humour and red flags are often posted subconsciously.

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By *asual777Man
45 weeks ago

i travel all over

I suspect most of those threads are a way of increasing traffic to the profile rather than an attempt to improve it .

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago


"I suspect most of those threads are a way of increasing traffic to the profile rather than an attempt to improve it . "

Yes, I agree.

I just ignore those posts as they are all given the same advice, so how true will the profile be about them as a person?

If I am chatting in a private message and asked, then yes, I will give my tuppence worth, but always say to be honest about yourself and not try to be someone you aren't!

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By *og-ManMan
45 weeks ago

somewhere


"I suspect most of those threads are a way of increasing traffic to the profile rather than an attempt to improve it . "

Isn't that the whole point of all threads

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By *aseylee324Couple
45 weeks ago

Valley of Squinting Windows


"The profile is a good indicator of a person, and leave them to describe themselves as they wish. Their forum posts (if any) are a goldmine of info. Humour and red flags are often posted subconsciously."

Agreed 100%, status updates another goldmine

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By *ipstick KissesWoman
45 weeks ago

South Down

I agree with the posters above re not giving profile advice. It's one of the best filters I have. Generic stuff, like using paragraphs rather than a wall of text is ok. But the specifics that allow me to gauge what the person is telling me Vs what their profile is showing me? That's like gold dust and I don't want it masked.

Similarly the "red flags" or "how to spot fake profiles" threads. That's a fine line to tread between helping people and enabling those who might create such profiles

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By *ofusplusCouple
45 weeks ago

Limerick

I'm happy to give advice, but I don't tell them what to say, more pointers about what to focus on.

I think their reaction to the advice is far more telling as most don't even acknowledge the effort/time people have taken to reply and others get very defensive because they perceive it as criticism.

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By *ea ShellsWoman
45 weeks ago

Sligo

I get frustrated when I have had several messages from the same guy wondering why I’m not responding. I look at his profile, no or little bio, no photo and no introduction message of any note. I occasionally message them and say how do you expect a response when there’s no information to read. A response from me or any other female for that matter.

As you say men have to do more to help themselves when the men vs woman ratio on Fab is so biased. But unfortunately those men are not aware. So it’s a learning curve for most.

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By *oxic1998Woman
45 weeks ago

Belfast


"I get frustrated when I have had several messages from the same guy wondering why I’m not responding. I look at his profile, no or little bio, no photo and no introduction message of any note. I occasionally message them and say how do you expect a response when there’s no information to read. A response from me or any other female for that matter.

As you say men have to do more to help themselves when the men vs woman ratio on Fab is so biased. But unfortunately those men are not aware. So it’s a learning curve for most. "

I normally end up blocking if they do that......no communication at all.

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By *oghunter33Woman
45 weeks ago

on the hill NordWest of

I think public profile advice is a waste of time and counterproductive from the perspective of the adviser. Rarely you see advise adopted and when it is it actually distorts the reflection of the person behind it.

Anyhow by the end of the day it's survival of the fab 'fittest'. It's not rocket science on here so if you can't work it out yourself you don't belong here respectively won't succeed. Simples. Sounds brutal but that's how fab ticks.

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