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When fun becomes addiction

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!

As the title says when is it classed as a problem, Ok this profile is only to post this as do not want to draw attention to our own profile, on here over 10 yrs and well verified.

A few weeks ago i mentioned how much time my partner was spending on line, as in fab ,fl, xn porn, tok tic, insta ect,was told it was normal.like im talking from 5,30 am to 12am 7 days a week every 20-30 min checking for mails ,fabbing pics and vids,It has caused a massive problem in our relationship. and now they are also on aw doing live cam shows and selling pics and videos.

Now we are not that stuck for money just as well because the return is crap if the truth be known they spend hours on their for €7 -€15 ,You wont make a living of it thats for sure.We all watch a bit of porn but 7 days a week ever few hours even when she working in my opinion is a bit worrying.

I have said what if someone from the town sees her, what if her job finds out, what if kids find out she is doing these live shows,the answer i got was its normal .

in a nut shell im saying she needs to talk to someone and im been told nothing wrong. whats everyones taughts on this amount of time on the sites, i had no probs with coming on here once twice a week, party every 6 wks if we were lucky. club in uk every 3-4 months and a swing holiday once a yr.

genuine answere please not looking for greef please

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
50 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

Firstly I feel for you as I can feel the stress and worry in your words. Do you feel that you get to do normal relationship stuff like date nights and time just the two of you, or is the swinging/sex stuff stopping that?

I guess what I'm getting at is this stuff getting in the way of anything or compromising other areas of your life?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Sounds like a problem all right it's very easy to become addicted on here. Met someone recently who was constantly on fab and doing other things as well. Then again I'm on here quite a lot but as a guy it takes quite a bit of work to actually meet a women from here it's quite difficult.

As she said why she's doing it? I know she's saying it's normal but what exactly does she define as normal and why the money aspect etc? Did you approach it from I'd like to understand what you see and what you're doing and why you're doing it rather than saying possibly perceived roadblocks etc.

Does she have her own money and independent of you? Maybe there's an angle there somewhere? Sorry don't mean to pry this is simply an attempt to understand and help through discussion

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!

100% it has taken over everything, we used to do date nights , walks in the eve, she won't even sit and watch TV with anyone in the house, up in the room alone on the phone. I work away a bit and when I get home it's like the ice queen in the house,

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ORBCouple
50 weeks ago

Dundalk

I'm not sure you will find a definitive answer on here.

There are lots of people who's lives revolve around fab or swinging so they may well say that what you are describing is normal and healthy.

Neither of us spend very long online each day and rarely if ever watch porn so to us it's not normal or healthy.

We have however seen first hand how some can become so obsessed with attention and a need for validation that they become unrecognisable.

The answers you are looking lie with a professional who can suggest ways for you to involve your partner in discussions with them, well away from the distractions of fab.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!

She has a good job with good pay, she is in a bit of bother with a car loan nothing major. I offered to pay of the arrears but she won't let me,btw we are not married. I have asked why she doing it and she said its just fun on cam, as for the fab side she sees it as 100% normal,

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Have you broached the subject of a sex therapist or some sort of therapist to see if you can get mediated common ground? It's really very difficult when somebody is shutting you and everybody else out but there may be a reason and maybe that's the addiction or maybe there's something else. It's finding out the why and addressing that if she's willing? Must be searching terrible situation to be sitting in.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

If someone was spending the same time smoking green or even drinking it would be a no brainier that it’s an addiction.

The moment something starts to affect your day to day lives then it’s a problem.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Such a

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

This is true

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"I'm not sure you will find a definitive answer on here.

There are lots of people who's lives revolve around fab or swinging so they may well say that what you are describing is normal and healthy.

Neither of us spend very long online each day and rarely if ever watch porn so to us it's not normal or healthy.

We have however seen first hand how some can become so obsessed with attention and a need for validation that they become unrecognisable.

The answers you are looking lie with a professional who can suggest ways for you to involve your partner in discussions with them, well away from the distractions of fab."

100% it's attention as far as I can see. A d yes professional help I have already mentioned and offered to go with her no problem at all, was told she don't need help

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *rRiosMan
50 weeks ago

dublin

Tbh it sounds like she needs to talk to someone about this. The problem is, she does not see it as a problem so yous are kinda stuck. It sounds like you’ve already talk about this extensively so I’m not sure what else you can do… wish I could offer better advice.

The fist step of any addiction is admitting you have a problem. Until that happens you can’t really take other steps to remedy the issue

Maybe try an angle of how it’s affecting you and your mental health and get her to empathize from your perspective?

Eitherway, sorry to hear.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
50 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"100% it has taken over everything, we used to do date nights , walks in the eve, she won't even sit and watch TV with anyone in the house, up in the room alone on the phone. I work away a bit and when I get home it's like the ice queen in the house,"

Definitely sounds like a problem. My take is that you need to help her understand how you feel this is impacting you and your relationship. She may consider that it's not a problem for her, but she MUST listen once it's a problem for you. You almost don't need to go as far as telling her that she had a problem. The fact that it's a problem for you is enough. She needs to make time for normal couple stuff as well as the naughty bits. I'd say a non-fab weekend away or time doing something you used to do together would be a good idea. You need to make space for each other.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

This is definitely very solid advice. Need to get away from fab and into the hands of someone who knows what they are dealing with.


"I'm not sure you will find a definitive answer on here.

There are lots of people who's lives revolve around fab or swinging so they may well say that what you are describing is normal and healthy.

Neither of us spend very long online each day and rarely if ever watch porn so to us it's not normal or healthy.

We have however seen first hand how some can become so obsessed with attention and a need for validation that they become unrecognisable.

The answers you are looking lie with a professional who can suggest ways for you to involve your partner in discussions with them, well away from the distractions of fab."

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Probably best to seek out a qualified therapist and speak to them independently yourself before seeing if you could get her to come along with you.


"This is definitely very solid advice. Need to get away from fab and into the hands of someone who knows what they are dealing with.

I'm not sure you will find a definitive answer on here.

There are lots of people who's lives revolve around fab or swinging so they may well say that what you are describing is normal and healthy.

Neither of us spend very long online each day and rarely if ever watch porn so to us it's not normal or healthy.

We have however seen first hand how some can become so obsessed with attention and a need for validation that they become unrecognisable.

The answers you are looking lie with a professional who can suggest ways for you to involve your partner in discussions with them, well away from the distractions of fab."

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *electableicecreamMan
50 weeks ago

The West

OP you may want to consider seeing a counsellor yourself while your are working your way through this.

There's a lot to be said for having a safe place to let off some steam while getting sound objective guidance on your next steps.

There are many free online counselling services such as talktome who offer six free weeks of counselling over video.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *osyRedLipsWoman
50 weeks ago

Kildare

Fab can definitely lead to addictive habits. If I find myself being on too much I take a step back and take a break. I only logged back in this week after not logging in for two months. It's just very easy to slip into the habit of constantly checking Fab. I think in this modern age our brain's are wired now seeking that dopamine hit.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *lameclubnightsWoman
50 weeks ago

ireland


"As the title says when is it classed as a problem, Ok this profile is only to post this as do not want to draw attention to our own profile, on here over 10 yrs and well verified.

A few weeks ago i mentioned how much time my partner was spending on line, as in fab ,fl, xn porn, tok tic, insta ect,was told it was normal.like im talking from 5,30 am to 12am 7 days a week every 20-30 min checking for mails ,fabbing pics and vids,It has caused a massive problem in our relationship. and now they are also on aw doing live cam shows and selling pics and videos.

Now we are not that stuck for money just as well because the return is crap if the truth be known they spend hours on their for €7 -€15 ,You wont make a living of it thats for sure.We all watch a bit of porn but 7 days a week ever few hours even when she working in my opinion is a bit worrying.

I have said what if someone from the town sees her, what if her job finds out, what if kids find out she is doing these live shows,the answer i got was its normal .

in a nut shell im saying she needs to talk to someone and im been told nothing wrong. whats everyones taughts on this amount of time on the sites, i had no probs with coming on here once twice a week, party every 6 wks if we were lucky. club in uk every 3-4 months and a swing holiday once a yr.

genuine answere please not looking for greef please "

Really feel for u here

Can’t imagine what it’s like to see someone u care so deeply about disappear before your eyes.

Please take care of urself through all this and get the supports that u need .

XXlalaXX ( I’m blocked on my own account)

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *antra MassageMan
50 weeks ago

South Side.

You have two opposing points of view.

The first step is for you to look after yourself, talk to a knowledgeable therapist who's familiar with these issues.

She is responsible for herself, and her side of your relationship, but you can't force change in someone else.

To help you understand how it's so difficult for her to change, read up on how trauma, or porn use affects the brain, and our thinking.

It's hard to be in a relationship with someone when their behaviour has changed so much since you first met them.

Best of luck.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ubadubdubWoman
50 weeks ago

Hereabouts

It's so frustrating living with someone who's addicted. And they can put the blinkers on to the impact addiction has on relationships and families. I empathise OP.

It raises so many questions too.

Why is the escapism necessary. Why don't they care that you are hurting. Why aren't they happy etc

But ultimately if they can't see the problem then its back on you isn't it. How long can you stick it if there's no change? If your needs are being neglected or minimised?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Tbh it sounds like she needs to talk to someone about this. The problem is, she does not see it as a problem so yous are kinda stuck. It sounds like you’ve already talk about this extensively so I’m not sure what else you can do… wish I could offer better advice.

The fist step of any addiction is admitting you have a problem. Until that happens you can’t really take other steps to remedy the issue

Maybe try an angle of how it’s affecting you and your mental health and get her to empathize from your perspective?

Eitherway, sorry to hear. "

i have already asked her to get help, and like you said first step to getting help is admiting you have a prob which she wont do,

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"100% it has taken over everything, we used to do date nights , walks in the eve, she won't even sit and watch TV with anyone in the house, up in the room alone on the phone. I work away a bit and when I get home it's like the ice queen in the house,

Definitely sounds like a problem. My take is that you need to help her understand how you feel this is impacting you and your relationship. She may consider that it's not a problem for her, but she MUST listen once it's a problem for you. You almost don't need to go as far as telling her that she had a problem. The fact that it's a problem for you is enough. She needs to make time for normal couple stuff as well as the naughty bits. I'd say a non-fab weekend away or time doing something you used to do together would be a good idea. You need to make space for each other."

she wont talk about it and is dead aginst it now,i cant force her to do anything, and the way things are now looks like christmas is going to be a total disaster

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"OP you may want to consider seeing a counsellor yourself while your are working your way through this.

There's a lot to be said for having a safe place to let off some steam while getting sound objective guidance on your next steps.

There are many free online counselling services such as talktome who offer six free weeks of counselling over video."

i have been speaking to a counsellor the last 3 weeks on and off as i as slipping deeper and deeper into a hole a cant see a way back from

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By *ineapple_PrincessWoman
50 weeks ago

in the waves

Have you tried talking to her about how it's affecting you or the kids? Does she realise you're seeking help? Maybe that might be a wake up call that you're serious.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Fab can definitely lead to addictive habits. If I find myself being on too much I take a step back and take a break. I only logged back in this week after not logging in for two months. It's just very easy to slip into the habit of constantly checking Fab. I think in this modern age our brain's are wired now seeking that dopamine hit. "

i am the very same i can go months without coming on here and i dont let it take over my life, but cant say the same for her at the min

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"As the title says when is it classed as a problem, Ok this profile is only to post this as do not want to draw attention to our own profile, on here over 10 yrs and well verified.

A few weeks ago i mentioned how much time my partner was spending on line, as in fab ,fl, xn porn, tok tic, insta ect,was told it was normal.like im talking from 5,30 am to 12am 7 days a week every 20-30 min checking for mails ,fabbing pics and vids,It has caused a massive problem in our relationship. and now they are also on aw doing live cam shows and selling pics and videos.

Now we are not that stuck for money just as well because the return is crap if the truth be known they spend hours on their for €7 -€15 ,You wont make a living of it thats for sure.We all watch a bit of porn but 7 days a week ever few hours even when she working in my opinion is a bit worrying.

I have said what if someone from the town sees her, what if her job finds out, what if kids find out she is doing these live shows,the answer i got was its normal .

in a nut shell im saying she needs to talk to someone and im been told nothing wrong. whats everyones taughts on this amount of time on the sites, i had no probs with coming on here once twice a week, party every 6 wks if we were lucky. club in uk every 3-4 months and a swing holiday once a yr.

genuine answere please not looking for greef please

Really feel for u here

Can’t imagine what it’s like to see someone u care so deeply about disappear before your eyes.

Please take care of urself through all this and get the supports that u need .

XXlalaXX ( I’m blocked on my own account) "

hi lala

thanks im trying my best,

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"You have two opposing points of view.

The first step is for you to look after yourself, talk to a knowledgeable therapist who's familiar with these issues.

She is responsible for herself, and her side of your relationship, but you can't force change in someone else.

To help you understand how it's so difficult for her to change, read up on how trauma, or porn use affects the brain, and our thinking.

It's hard to be in a relationship with someone when their behaviour has changed so much since you first met them.

Best of luck. "

thanks, i have been seeking info about this the last 6-7 wks and its not a nice place to be or the outcome is not looking good right now

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"It's so frustrating living with someone who's addicted. And they can put the blinkers on to the impact addiction has on relationships and families. I empathise OP.

It raises so many questions too.

Why is the escapism necessary. Why don't they care that you are hurting. Why aren't they happy etc

But ultimately if they can't see the problem then its back on you isn't it. How long can you stick it if there's no change? If your needs are being neglected or minimised?"

i have not been in the house the last 4 wks, she does not care who she is hurting right now as she says its normal behaviour. and she is seeking out more and more than ever before on fab, and i know 110% its only a matter of when and where right now

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Have you tried talking to her about how it's affecting you or the kids? Does she realise you're seeking help? Maybe that might be a wake up call that you're serious. "

at the min she does not care who she is hurting, and kids dont know anything about it, when i did say what if they find ous her answer was im not ashamed of what im doing ,

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!

can i just say to everyone who has posted to this topic so far a massive thank you,i was really struggling and unsure about posting on here as i cant talk to friends or family about it,

i am in a very dark place right now with all this and i dont know if i can save what we had or ever get back to where we were,

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *antra MassageMan
50 weeks ago

South Side.

I didn't realise you have kids. That's changes how I'd view this. I sympathise with you, and know many people in your , and her situation who have come through this kind of difficulty and out the other end, still in a loving relationship. I'd suggest, with the greatest respect to you both, , as kids are involved, not discussing this in a public forum like Fab. DM me if you would like to discuss it privately, or talk privately to trusted counsellors.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"I didn't realise you have kids. That's changes how I'd view this. I sympathise with you, and know many people in your , and her situation who have come through this kind of difficulty and out the other end, still in a loving relationship. I'd suggest, with the greatest respect to you both, , as kids are involved, not discussing this in a public forum like Fab. DM me if you would like to discuss it privately, or talk privately to trusted counsellors. "

ok she has, not mine but i would class as mine. but changes nothing, and like i said from the beginning thats why i set up this profile as not to draw any attention to our profile,

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By *aid backMan
50 weeks ago

by a lake with my rod out

Honestly if someone is causing you this much distress I'd be thinking of leaving them. Especially if she doesn't care what she's doing or doesn't regard your feelings

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Honestly if someone is causing you this much distress I'd be thinking of leaving them. Especially if she doesn't care what she's doing or doesn't regard your feelings "

easier said than done when she is the person you love and cant see any wrong in. she has a heart of gold and is a wonderful person, i hope this is just a faze she is going through and as far as im aware she is peri menopause, i guess anyone can make mistakes and if i walked away now without trying id never forgive myself

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By *og-ManMan
50 weeks ago

somewhere

Op

Do you have any couples or females on fab that you're friends with

Not fab friends but someone that's gone on to be a real friend that could talk to her since they know fab

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Op

Do you have any couples or females on fab that you're friends with

Not fab friends but someone that's gone on to be a real friend that could talk to her since they know fab "

yes her best friend is on here she has tried talking to her and she just shut her down about it

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

OP your ina a very difficult situation, hope it all works out well for you,

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"OP your ina a very difficult situation, hope it all works out well for you, "

Thank you

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By *3nsesMan
50 weeks ago

Dublin

You need to think about protecting yourself and your own mental health OP. I would strongly suggest distancing yourself from her. You can force a person to change and the more you try and the more it falls the more you'll be the one who is suffering.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"You need to think about protecting yourself and your own mental health OP. I would strongly suggest distancing yourself from her. You can force a person to change and the more you try and the more it falls the more you'll be the one who is suffering. "

I'm suffering so much right now seen the lady I love just slipping away, my mental health is so smashed right now I'm actually numb

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!

Just your typical start to the day

1,40am insta last on line

5,40am insta

6,10am toc tik

6,45am aw

7,05am fab

And has bounced between all to up to now at 7,30am someone please tell me that's not normal by any means, 110% that is addiction in my eyes

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By *og-ManMan
50 weeks ago

somewhere


"Just your typical start to the day

1,40am insta last on line

5,40am insta

6,10am toc tik

6,45am aw

7,05am fab

And has bounced between all to up to now at 7,30am someone please tell me that's not normal by any means, 110% that is addiction in my eyes "

Can I ask how do you know her time spent on each one

Do you share a bed

Is she keeping you awake with her phone

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Just your typical start to the day

1,40am insta last on line

5,40am insta

6,10am toc tik

6,45am aw

7,05am fab

And has bounced between all to up to now at 7,30am someone please tell me that's not normal by any means, 110% that is addiction in my eyes

Can I ask how do you know her time spent on each one

Do you share a bed

Is she keeping you awake with her phone

"

It's when she was on line/logged in to sites, I haven't been home in 3wks but even when I was in bed beside her yes was no difference

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
50 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

I'd be really really worried about you being out of the family home and checking her login times etc. Get out and do something healthy for you. Talk to your family and friends. Let her know that you are there for her and her kids once she's ready to talk about these issues and take your needs seriously.

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By *osyRedLipsWoman
50 weeks ago

Kildare

Stay Focused is a good app to block sites and apps. Maybe you could say to her could she try it over the Christmas period. There's various settings on it like time limits or blocks. There's also options not to be able to log into certain sites apps until the countdown is over. If you put it on strict settings, there's no way to change it even uninstalling the app won't work will still be blocked.

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Stay Focused is a good app to block sites and apps. Maybe you could say to her could she try it over the Christmas period. There's various settings on it like time limits or blocks. There's also options not to be able to log into certain sites apps until the countdown is over. If you put it on strict settings, there's no way to change it even uninstalling the app won't work will still be blocked. "

Thanks all I can do is ask but I'm fairly sure the answer will be no

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
50 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

Also, when I was going through a fab related seperation it made things so much harder that I wasnt able to talk candidly about it. I gave that up after a while and am very open which really really helped. Dealing with secrecy at the same time as the other issues makes it so much harder. Have you someone you can talk openly to?

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
50 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"I'd be really really worried about you being out of the family home and checking her login times etc. Get out and do something healthy for you. Talk to your family and friends. Let her know that you are there for her and her kids once she's ready to talk about these issues and take your needs seriously."
I work away so it's nothing out of the norm, but can't see this been half sorted before Xmas so it's going to be another messed up Xmas,

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
49 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!

Good morning all just a small update, she did read this yesterday and spent most of the day on fab and aw and then last night the aw profile was cleaned of all pics and videos, is it the first step to getting the help I asked for I don't know time will tell, yesterday was a very hard day for myself I took the advice of one you and had a session on turn 2 me which has helped, I drive a truck long distance and its hard been alone and away from home, when things go wrong u are powerless to do anything to fix things,I was and still am not in a great place right now but hopefully their is some light at the end of this tunnel, I will say this, if ur friend, partner,or a stranger ever reaches out, asks for help, advice, anything. Life is to short for not helping or listening, no one knows what's going on in someone's life, sometimes head and all it takes is a few min to change everything for everyone

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By *rRiosMan
49 weeks ago

dublin


"Good morning all just a small update, she did read this yesterday and spent most of the day on fab and aw and then last night the aw profile was cleaned of all pics and videos, is it the first step to getting the help I asked for I don't know time will tell, yesterday was a very hard day for myself I took the advice of one you and had a session on turn 2 me which has helped, I drive a truck long distance and its hard been alone and away from home, when things go wrong u are powerless to do anything to fix things,I was and still am not in a great place right now but hopefully their is some light at the end of this tunnel, I will say this, if ur friend, partner,or a stranger ever reaches out, asks for help, advice, anything. Life is to short for not helping or listening, no one knows what's going on in someone's life, sometimes head and all it takes is a few min to change everything for everyone"

All you can both do is take it one day at a time but it sounds like it’s moving in the right direction which is great to see. It will be a long journey and there will probably be some set backs so don’t be disheartened and keep at it. Glad you got to speak to someone too.

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By *oghunter33Woman
49 weeks ago

on the hill NordWest of

Reading through the thread and your posts, I came to think that you being away for weeks might have to do with it, missing your company and attention, feeling bit lonely and the social media offers a great deal of (false/fake) attention especially when the clothes come off.

Now I'm not saying it's your fault, obviously we all have to make a living. However it might be something you and your partner have to discuss and overcome once your relationship gets out of this downward spiral.

Plenty of good advise above, she might deny her online binging but it's not just about her and her social media disorder, as others mentioned she has to face respectively be confronted with that it's about you and her and your relationship that is at stake. Hopefully that will give her the wake-up call she needs.

All the best op!

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By *quirtteacherMan
49 weeks ago

Athlone


"Reading through the thread and your posts, I came to think that you being away for weeks might have to do with it, missing your company and attention, feeling bit lonely and the social media offers a great deal of (false/fake) attention especially when the clothes come off.

Now I'm not saying it's your fault, obviously we all have to make a living. However it might be something you and your partner have to discuss and overcome once your relationship gets out of this downward spiral.

Plenty of good advise above, she might deny her online binging but it's not just about her and her social media disorder, as others mentioned she has to face respectively be confronted with that it's about you and her and your relationship that is at stake. Hopefully that will give her the wake-up call she needs.

All the best op!

"

I'm not away for weeks since we moved in together, most I'd be gone is 4/5 days at a max,

She don't seem to care who is getting hurt I have told her how it's affected me and all I get is the def ear,

She is going to do what pleases her and who gets in the way is now does not matter

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By *ickheadcuntCouple
49 weeks ago

Cork Ireland

Fab is full of people of might claim to be your friend but are really not, going on 22 years in the lifestyle and it's very important to switch off from time to time and enjoy life and your partner and kids, call it a kinda resetting the clock.

Really hope you both find the balance you are looking for.

It's a fantastic lifestyle but that too at times needs a brake.

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
49 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Fab is full of people of might claim to be your friend but are really not, going on 22 years in the lifestyle and it's very important to switch off from time to time and enjoy life and your partner and kids, call it a kinda resetting the clock.

Really hope you both find the balance you are looking for.

It's a fantastic lifestyle but that too at times needs a brake."

110% agree with you but she don't want to open her eyes to what she is doing or causing,

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
49 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!

Ok after a few days to way up everything and all the messages I have received and advice given by everyone that took the time to read this post I'm done trying to fix something I can't fix because it's not me at fault here and you can't help someone who won't admit they need help, I will always love her and if she ever gets the help she needs I will be the first person their for her,

I have done nothing wrong and for that I have no reason to hide behind this post any longer so I'm going to start using this profile from this eve, just waiting on pics to be approved and fill in a few basic details.

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By *rRiosMan
49 weeks ago

dublin

All you can do is be there to support them and try to take care of your own mental health in doing so. Try to remember the three C’s of dealing with someone with an addiction. You didn’t cause it, you can’t cure it and you can’t control it.

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago


"As the title says when is it classed as a problem, Ok this profile is only to post this as do not want to draw attention to our own profile, on here over 10 yrs and well verified.

A few weeks ago i mentioned how much time my partner was spending on line, as in fab ,fl, xn porn, tok tic, insta ect,was told it was normal.like im talking from 5,30 am to 12am 7 days a week every 20-30 min checking for mails ,fabbing pics and vids,It has caused a massive problem in our relationship. and now they are also on aw doing live cam shows and selling pics and videos.

Now we are not that stuck for money just as well because the return is crap if the truth be known they spend hours on their for €7 -€15 ,You wont make a living of it thats for sure.We all watch a bit of porn but 7 days a week ever few hours even when she working in my opinion is a bit worrying.

I have said what if someone from the town sees her, what if her job finds out, what if kids find out she is doing these live shows,the answer i got was its normal .

in a nut shell im saying she needs to talk to someone and im been told nothing wrong. whats everyones taughts on this amount of time on the sites, i had no probs with coming on here once twice a week, party every 6 wks if we were lucky. club in uk every 3-4 months and a swing holiday once a yr.

genuine answere please not looking for greef please "

She clearly has an addiction....& She needs to gradually reduce her screen time....she could possibly be just addicting to her phone or whatever other device she uses....

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
49 weeks ago

East / North, Cork

[Removed by poster at 18/12/23 17:14:13]

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
49 weeks ago

East / North, Cork


"Ok after a few days to way up everything and all the messages I have received and advice given by everyone that took the time to read this post I'm done trying to fix something I can't fix because it's not me at fault here and you can't help someone who won't admit they need help, I will always love her and if she ever gets the help she needs I will be the first person their for her,

I have done nothing wrong and for that I have no reason to hide behind this post any longer so I'm going to start using this profile from this eve, just waiting on pics to be approved and fill in a few basic details."

I'd suggest taking a break yourself as this whole thing is going to be more than a little traumatising and probably isn't the right time for casual sex. You've got far more important things to deal with.

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By *axlecool03Man
49 weeks ago

Dublin

[Removed by poster at 18/12/23 17:17:19]

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By *axlecool03Man
49 weeks ago

Dublin


"Ok after a few days to way up everything and all the messages I have received and advice given by everyone that took the time to read this post I'm done trying to fix something I can't fix because it's not me at fault here and you can't help someone who won't admit they need help, I will always love her and if she ever gets the help she needs I will be the first person their for her,

I have done nothing wrong and for that I have no reason to hide behind this post any longer so I'm going to start using this profile from this eve, just waiting on pics to be approved and fill in a few basic details."

So.. thanks for describing this situation,.. but i do not understand your intentions behind creating this profile uploading pics and using this as a separate one from your couples profile... its totally your life and decisions.. but are you taking her actions as an excuse to fly solo...

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago


"Ok after a few days to way up everything and all the messages I have received and advice given by everyone that took the time to read this post I'm done trying to fix something I can't fix because it's not me at fault here and you can't help someone who won't admit they need help, I will always love her and if she ever gets the help she needs I will be the first person their for her,

I have done nothing wrong and for that I have no reason to hide behind this post any longer so I'm going to start using this profile from this eve, just waiting on pics to be approved and fill in a few basic details.

So.. thanks for describing this situation,.. but i do not understand your intentions behind creating this profile uploading pics and using this as a separate one from your couples profile... its totally your life and decisions.. but are you taking her actions as an excuse to fly solo..."

I'm thinking the same....is this just an excuse "to fly solo"....I assume your partner knows you're gonna have a single account here yes....or is it in secret....I know this current account is in secret right now....but does she know you're now here solo?

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By *inkyKat2023Woman
49 weeks ago

KinkyVille !!!

WATCH OUT !!!!!

The truth is gonna come out

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
49 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Ok after a few days to way up everything and all the messages I have received and advice given by everyone that took the time to read this post I'm done trying to fix something I can't fix because it's not me at fault here and you can't help someone who won't admit they need help, I will always love her and if she ever gets the help she needs I will be the first person their for her,

I have done nothing wrong and for that I have no reason to hide behind this post any longer so I'm going to start using this profile from this eve, just waiting on pics to be approved and fill in a few basic details.

So.. thanks for describing this situation,.. but i do not understand your intentions behind creating this profile uploading pics and using this as a separate one from your couples profile... its totally your life and decisions.. but are you taking her actions as an excuse to fly solo..."

I never wanted to fly solo, this was to keep attention away from our own profile, and it was to seek opinions on if the post was an addiction.

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By *inkyKat2023Woman
49 weeks ago

KinkyVille !!!

Define - OUR OWN PROFILE ????

As far as I’m aware you’re single !!!

Love the depiction of the victim you have outlined above - pity it’s not the truth

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
49 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Ok after a few days to way up everything and all the messages I have received and advice given by everyone that took the time to read this post I'm done trying to fix something I can't fix because it's not me at fault here and you can't help someone who won't admit they need help, I will always love her and if she ever gets the help she needs I will be the first person their for her,

I have done nothing wrong and for that I have no reason to hide behind this post any longer so I'm going to start using this profile from this eve, just waiting on pics to be approved and fill in a few basic details.

So.. thanks for describing this situation,.. but i do not understand your intentions behind creating this profile uploading pics and using this as a separate one from your couples profile... its totally your life and decisions.. but are you taking her actions as an excuse to fly solo...

I'm thinking the same....is this just an excuse "to fly solo"....I assume your partner knows you're gonna have a single account here yes....or is it in secret....I know this current account is in secret right now....but does she know you're now here solo?"

She changed the original cpl profile to a single lady, their is nothing In secret. She is the one who chose to fly solo for her own gain and not worried about who got hurt in the crossfire of her actions

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By *quirtteacherMan
49 weeks ago

Athlone

[Removed by poster at 18/12/23 18:34:59]

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
49 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Define - OUR OWN PROFILE ????

As far as I’m aware you’re single !!!

Love the depiction of the victim you have outlined above - pity it’s not the truth "

OK so tell us the truth please

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By *inkyKat2023Woman
49 weeks ago

KinkyVille !!!

Here’s a couple of definitions to look up for yourself

Coercion

Manipulation

Stalking

Black mail

To name a few !!!!

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
49 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"Here’s a couple of definitions to look up for yourself

Coercion

Manipulation

Stalking

Black mail

To name a few !!!! "

OK

So your not on adul twork doing lives, selling pics and videos ?

Your not fab 4-5 hrs a day

Your not on xn watching porn 20 -30 times a day

Your not on Instagram for the same 3-4 hrs a day ?

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By *og-ManMan
49 weeks ago

somewhere

So this went places I didn't expect

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By *inkyKat2023Woman
49 weeks ago

KinkyVille !!!


"So this went places I didn't expect "

It’s always great when people only get 1 side of the story !!!!!

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By *electableicecreamMan
49 weeks ago

The West


"So this went places I didn't expect "

You mean the the guy that gained everyone's sympathy and then announced he was abandoning his girlfriend and her kids to fly solo on his own profile because he just couldn't take it anymore might not have been telling the whole truth?

I'm shocked I tell you. Shocked!

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By *electableicecreamMan
49 weeks ago

The West


"Here’s a couple of definitions to look up for yourself

Coercion

Manipulation

Stalking

Black mail

To name a few !!!!

OK

So your not on adul twork doing lives, selling pics and videos ?

Your not fab 4-5 hrs a day

Your not on xn watching porn 20 -30 times a day

Your not on Instagram for the same 3-4 hrs a day ?"

I'd say you have about an hour before the ban hammer descends and this whole thread gets nuked off the face of the earth.

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By *r_Insatiable666Man
49 weeks ago

Cork

Better than any soap Christmas special

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By *ealitybitesMan
49 weeks ago

Belfast


"Ok after a few days to way up everything and all the messages I have received and advice given by everyone that took the time to read this post I'm done trying to fix something I can't fix because it's not me at fault here and you can't help someone who won't admit they need help, I will always love her and if she ever gets the help she needs I will be the first person their for her,

I have done nothing wrong and for that I have no reason to hide behind this post any longer so I'm going to start using this profile from this eve, just waiting on pics to be approved and fill in a few basic details.

So.. thanks for describing this situation,.. but i do not understand your intentions behind creating this profile uploading pics and using this as a separate one from your couples profile... its totally your life and decisions.. but are you taking her actions as an excuse to fly solo...

I never wanted to fly solo, this was to keep attention away from our own profile, and it was to seek opinions on if the post was an addiction. "

So who's in charge of the other single male profile you've posted from a couple of times in this thread?

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By *sxrguy2323 OP   Man
49 weeks ago

kinkyville !!!


"So this went places I didn't expect

You mean the the guy that gained everyone's sympathy and then announced he was abandoning his girlfriend and her kids to fly solo on his own profile because he just couldn't take it anymore might not have been telling the whole truth?

I'm shocked I tell you. Shocked!"
I never flew solo , never abandoned anyone. You try help someone who won't get 100% come back and tell how you got on

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