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By *ollypop9 OP   Woman
over a year ago

wouldn't you like to know

Coming into the darker months of the year again, I thought we have a little chat here about Mental Health.

I know it's an all year round issue but also know from my own experience, that the Winter months can be a lot tougher.

Please check on that friend/acquaintance who has gone quiet.

My inbox is always open if anyone ever feels they need a chat.

If you feel anyhow low or alone and feel that you're not coping to well, please seek help with your GP.

There is absolutely no shame in asking for help. You be suprised how many people feel the same.

Please feel free to share below your thoughts and feelings on the matter.

Maybe even share your stories on how you learned to cope, who and what worked for you (I know everyone is different).

If you need to talk to someone, below are a number of helplines you can contact for confidential non-judgemental support. For a more detailed list please go to Mental Health Ireland.

Most helplines can provide a listening service, give information and advice, provide emotional support or point you in the direction of other services. They are often free-phone services which are staffed by trained volunteers or employees, day and night.

If you or someone you know is at risk of suicide or self-harm, you should make contact immediately with one of the following:

Phone or go to your local doctor

Go to the Accident & Emergency department of the nearest hospital

Call 999

Helplines :

SOSAD Ireland: 1800 901 909

Samaritans: 116 123

Aware: 1800 80 48 48

Pieta House: 1800 247 247

textaboutit: text HELLO to 50808

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By *astelloWoman
over a year ago

Far far away

Great tips Lolly.. Thanks for sharing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you for sharing Lolly. Such an incredibly important subject. We need to be kind to ourselves and each other.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice post, good to have a reminder that it’s ok to ask for support / help. Thanks for sharing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's ok to not be ok

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By *limfitladMan
over a year ago

Dublin

Great call Lolly.

Check in on those that might need it. And when they don't want to talk let them know you're here.

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By *ilverjayMan
over a year ago

Meath

Wow oh wow oh wow.

I'm struggling. Really really struggling.7

I know I am.

I've being seeing a counsellor but not finding it much help tbh.

I only searched the forums earlier today for this subject and low and behold a thread starts about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately a lot more people struggle in silence as very few actually care.

I have personally learnt this year people are great at posting on social media about been there or be kind etc

But very few mean their words , actions speak louder than words.

So if you notice someone is gone quiet, reach out don't wait till they feel better. I go quiet because I feel isolated and lonely and don't hear from anyone and when I do I get told ' oh you went quiet" thought you wanted time to yourself. No I'm actually feeling very lost and alone and its amazing what a text can do.

So please reach out to people

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By *ifestyleMan
over a year ago

Omagh & Dublin

S.A.D is somthing that effects alot of people and they dont even know it luckily I now know the symptoms and what to do but I know from experience how debilitating it can beand the effect it can have on your life thanks Lolly

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By *thloneros38Man
over a year ago

athlone/roscommon

Iv had afew people come to me about their mental health just for a chat and open up

Its something i feel strongly about in helping people to speak out have a chat or even just to sit for a minute knowing that theres someone always there willing to listen and not to be alone and bottle things up when they feel they are at their lowest ....fair play lolly for having this topic .

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By *lay rock69Man
over a year ago

monaghan

Great post lolly thank for sharing xx

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By *he zephyrCouple
over a year ago

The Sol

It is that time of year again OP, I feel it coming. The clocks going back is when it really hits me though.

Best thing I've found is to get a walk in during daylight, and lower my expectations of myself, Im solar powered! In winter I simply do not have the energy to power on through.

I have a SAD lamp as well for the mornings.

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By *panishRebelMan
over a year ago

Alicante Spain, and Cork City Ireland

There's probably no one unaffected. Either personality or through friendship or family even work. There's no quick pill.

Things I personally found to help are, in those down times, keep one thing per day that you can achieve, even if it's small. Find something to hope in. Hope is amazing.

The best is to find company, but myself I can't always stay with company.

Make yourself eat and drink at least one good thing or meal a day.

Stay active if possible.

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford

Fairplay to you Lolly.

Not an easy topic to talk about, as people don't want to talk about it. As they feel ashamed or something bad about it. Which they shouldn't ever feel like that EVERY.

Personally I don't like this time of the year or the next 6 month's overall. Thankfully I don't get bad really, small bit down alright. Just like alot of people. I always try to keep in good/happy form. Even doe, there's nobody going out of there way to check in on me, nor am I on them or other's either. That said, if anybody needs someone to talk to, I'm happy to listen to them anytime. As it's ok to not be ok. Your better to talk to someone, if you can, than keep it all bottled up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great Post lolly, my son is suffering from mental health issues and he been pushed from Billy to Jack for the last 3 years it's a disgrace, he's getting to the stage he doesn't want to see anyone. He won't leave the house only to go to school.

It's a true saying your health is your wealth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It is that time of year again OP, I feel it coming. The clocks going back is when it really hits me though.

Best thing I've found is to get a walk in during daylight, and lower my expectations of myself, Im solar powered! In winter I simply do not have the energy to power on through.

I have a SAD lamp as well for the mornings. "

Do you find the lamp helps?

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By *he zephyrCouple
over a year ago

The Sol


"It is that time of year again OP, I feel it coming. The clocks going back is when it really hits me though.

Best thing I've found is to get a walk in during daylight, and lower my expectations of myself, Im solar powered! In winter I simply do not have the energy to power on through.

I have a SAD lamp as well for the mornings.

Do you find the lamp helps? "

It does help in the morning for sure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It is that time of year again OP, I feel it coming. The clocks going back is when it really hits me though.

Best thing I've found is to get a walk in during daylight, and lower my expectations of myself, Im solar powered! In winter I simply do not have the energy to power on through.

I have a SAD lamp as well for the mornings.

Do you find the lamp helps?

It does help in the morning for sure "

Thank you have looked at them on amazon a few times, will definitely pick one up

X

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By *ifestyleMan
over a year ago

Omagh & Dublin

believe it or not I find having a meet or fun night to look forward to helps

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"believe it or not I find having a meet or fun night to look forward to helps"

If only lol

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By *ollypop9 OP   Woman
over a year ago

wouldn't you like to know

I opened another thread there. A suggestion for the men on here...

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By *om TangoMan
over a year ago

aughnacloy monaghan area

Thanks to OP for starting this. Something I wanted to do myself but didn’t know how to. every 3 in 4 suicides being men. Lady’s bad news. Some of us big strong men aren’t that strong. We’re weak but yous can be forgiven for not knowing that. Why. Because us men hide it. We’re ashamed to show it. Why. Because we’re told to man up and stop acting the wee girl from a very young age. A woman walks into the work place looking sad. The other lady’s are likely to ask her if everything is ok. Men walk into a building site looking sad and the other men think what’s wrong will that cunt, he must’ve of gotten the ride last night. I’m trying not to make this a long post as not to bore yous. I’m weak and I WAS but not anymore ashamed of how I felt, how I cried for little or no reason, how I’d wake up disappointed in the morning to find myself alive with another day to battle. Go to yoyr to doctor what do they give you? 28 fucking tablets! Well now in my hand I’ve enough tablets to take an overdose. What does it say on the box? “These drugs may cause suicidal thoughts”. Doctor tells u to come back in 28 days. Then what does the doctor do. Ups the dose to a stronger one.causing u to feel numb. No fucks give. If I going to the doctor tomorrow with a drink problem I’ve AA to turn to. Same with a drug problem. Automatically given contact and details or a support group. Go with depression and ur given enough drugs to end your life. I was at a lake back early this year, a cold wet Sunday morning. Oh god i swear I never felt as peaceful in years known my pain was about to end. But somehow the stupidest of thing popped into my head. I’d promised a old lady I’d do something for her. So I left to go to her with the plan to return to the lake. Not for a minute didn’t I think of the pain I would be passing onto my family. So people. If you do feel sad and full of pain I want yous to remember this. Ending ur life won’t end that pain. Your only passing it onto many many others. Please reach out for help. I didn’t for over 5 years. 5 long fucking years feeling ashamed. Today I tell my story because it’s my story. Not yours, it’s my story and I’m a very proud man to tell yous all. I’M WEAK but I will make it to tomorrow and I’ll face my fucking demons head on and look that tramp square in the eyes and beat the mother fucker. Inbox open to any men afraid to tell a loved one. Sorry ladies I know nothing about lady’s mental health so im not going to pretend I will understand ur sorry. Sorry for the long text.

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By *andytownMan
over a year ago

Gods Own Country

Bravo for keeping this difficult subject so relevant

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By *electableicecreamMan
over a year ago

The West

Shout out to all the workers and volunteers in mental health

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"Thanks to OP for starting this. Something I wanted to do myself but didn’t know how to. every 3 in 4 suicides being men. Lady’s bad news. Some of us big strong men aren’t that strong. We’re weak but yous can be forgiven for not knowing that. Why. Because us men hide it. We’re ashamed to show it. Why. Because we’re told to man up and stop acting the wee girl from a very young age. A woman walks into the work place looking sad. The other lady’s are likely to ask her if everything is ok. Men walk into a building site looking sad and the other men think what’s wrong will that cunt, he must’ve of gotten the ride last night. I’m trying not to make this a long post as not to bore yous. I’m weak and I WAS but not anymore ashamed of how I felt, how I cried for little or no reason, how I’d wake up disappointed in the morning to find myself alive with another day to battle. Go to yoyr to doctor what do they give you? 28 fucking tablets! Well now in my hand I’ve enough tablets to take an overdose. What does it say on the box? “These drugs may cause suicidal thoughts”. Doctor tells u to come back in 28 days. Then what does the doctor do. Ups the dose to a stronger one.causing u to feel numb. No fucks give. If I going to the doctor tomorrow with a drink problem I’ve AA to turn to. Same with a drug problem. Automatically given contact and details or a support group. Go with depression and ur given enough drugs to end your life. I was at a lake back early this year, a cold wet Sunday morning. Oh god i swear I never felt as peaceful in years known my pain was about to end. But somehow the stupidest of thing popped into my head. I’d promised a old lady I’d do something for her. So I left to go to her with the plan to return to the lake. Not for a minute didn’t I think of the pain I would be passing onto my family. So people. If you do feel sad and full of pain I want yous to remember this. Ending ur life won’t end that pain. Your only passing it onto many many others. Please reach out for help. I didn’t for over 5 years. 5 long fucking years feeling ashamed. Today I tell my story because it’s my story. Not yours, it’s my story and I’m a very proud man to tell yous all. I’M WEAK but I will make it to tomorrow and I’ll face my fucking demons head on and look that tramp square in the eyes and beat the mother fucker. Inbox open to any men afraid to tell a loved one. Sorry ladies I know nothing about lady’s mental health so im not going to pretend I will understand ur sorry. Sorry for the long text. "

JASUS man. I take my hat off to you, big time. If we could have gif on here I'd have 1 for you. So all I can do if stand up & give you a clapping ovation. As you've been there & worn the T-shirt. Good for you & your right in everything you said.

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By *om TangoMan
over a year ago

aughnacloy monaghan area


"Thanks to OP for starting this. Something I wanted to do myself but didn’t know how to. every 3 in 4 suicides being men. Lady’s bad news. Some of us big strong men aren’t that strong. We’re weak but yous can be forgiven for not knowing that. Why. Because us men hide it. We’re ashamed to show it. Why. Because we’re told to man up and stop acting the wee girl from a very young age. A woman walks into the work place looking sad. The other lady’s are likely to ask her if everything is ok. Men walk into a building site looking sad and the other men think what’s wrong will that cunt, he must’ve of gotten the ride last night. I’m trying not to make this a long post as not to bore yous. I’m weak and I WAS but not anymore ashamed of how I felt, how I cried for little or no reason, how I’d wake up disappointed in the morning to find myself alive with another day to battle. Go to yoyr to doctor what do they give you? 28 fucking tablets! Well now in my hand I’ve enough tablets to take an overdose. What does it say on the box? “These drugs may cause suicidal thoughts”. Doctor tells u to come back in 28 days. Then what does the doctor do. Ups the dose to a stronger one.causing u to feel numb. No fucks give. If I going to the doctor tomorrow with a drink problem I’ve AA to turn to. Same with a drug problem. Automatically given contact and details or a support group. Go with depression and ur given enough drugs to end your life. I was at a lake back early this year, a cold wet Sunday morning. Oh god i swear I never felt as peaceful in years known my pain was about to end. But somehow the stupidest of thing popped into my head. I’d promised a old lady I’d do something for her. So I left to go to her with the plan to return to the lake. Not for a minute didn’t I think of the pain I would be passing onto my family. So people. If you do feel sad and full of pain I want yous to remember this. Ending ur life won’t end that pain. Your only passing it onto many many others. Please reach out for help. I didn’t for over 5 years. 5 long fucking years feeling ashamed. Today I tell my story because it’s my story. Not yours, it’s my story and I’m a very proud man to tell yous all. I’M WEAK but I will make it to tomorrow and I’ll face my fucking demons head on and look that tramp square in the eyes and beat the mother fucker. Inbox open to any men afraid to tell a loved one. Sorry ladies I know nothing about lady’s mental health so im not going to pretend I will understand ur sorry. Sorry for the long text.

JASUS man. I take my hat off to you, big time. If we could have gif on here I'd have 1 for you. So all I can do if stand up & give you a clapping ovation. As you've been there & worn the T-shirt. Good for you & your right in everything you said. "

That actually took me over an hour to write. Few tears got involved

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"Thanks to OP for starting this. Something I wanted to do myself but didn’t know how to. every 3 in 4 suicides being men. Lady’s bad news. Some of us big strong men aren’t that strong. We’re weak but yous can be forgiven for not knowing that. Why. Because us men hide it. We’re ashamed to show it. Why. Because we’re told to man up and stop acting the wee girl from a very young age. A woman walks into the work place looking sad. The other lady’s are likely to ask her if everything is ok. Men walk into a building site looking sad and the other men think what’s wrong will that cunt, he must’ve of gotten the ride last night. I’m trying not to make this a long post as not to bore yous. I’m weak and I WAS but not anymore ashamed of how I felt, how I cried for little or no reason, how I’d wake up disappointed in the morning to find myself alive with another day to battle. Go to yoyr to doctor what do they give you? 28 fucking tablets! Well now in my hand I’ve enough tablets to take an overdose. What does it say on the box? “These drugs may cause suicidal thoughts”. Doctor tells u to come back in 28 days. Then what does the doctor do. Ups the dose to a stronger one.causing u to feel numb. No fucks give. If I going to the doctor tomorrow with a drink problem I’ve AA to turn to. Same with a drug problem. Automatically given contact and details or a support group. Go with depression and ur given enough drugs to end your life. I was at a lake back early this year, a cold wet Sunday morning. Oh god i swear I never felt as peaceful in years known my pain was about to end. But somehow the stupidest of thing popped into my head. I’d promised a old lady I’d do something for her. So I left to go to her with the plan to return to the lake. Not for a minute didn’t I think of the pain I would be passing onto my family. So people. If you do feel sad and full of pain I want yous to remember this. Ending ur life won’t end that pain. Your only passing it onto many many others. Please reach out for help. I didn’t for over 5 years. 5 long fucking years feeling ashamed. Today I tell my story because it’s my story. Not yours, it’s my story and I’m a very proud man to tell yous all. I’M WEAK but I will make it to tomorrow and I’ll face my fucking demons head on and look that tramp square in the eyes and beat the mother fucker. Inbox open to any men afraid to tell a loved one. Sorry ladies I know nothing about lady’s mental health so im not going to pretend I will understand ur sorry. Sorry for the long text.

JASUS man. I take my hat off to you, big time. If we could have gif on here I'd have 1 for you. So all I can do if stand up & give you a clapping ovation. As you've been there & worn the T-shirt. Good for you & your right in everything you said.

That actually took me over an hour to write. Few tears got involved "

I it did alright. Nothing wrong with shedding a few tears or it taking a long time to write something for somewhere. Be that here anywhere else. It takes me a good while to write thing's on here aswell & that's just writing it.

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By *ilverjayMan
over a year ago

Meath


"Thanks to OP for starting this. Something I wanted to do myself but didn’t know how to. every 3 in 4 suicides being men. Lady’s bad news. Some of us big strong men aren’t that strong. We’re weak but yous can be forgiven for not knowing that. Why. Because us men hide it. We’re ashamed to show it. Why. Because we’re told to man up and stop acting the wee girl from a very young age. A woman walks into the work place looking sad. The other lady’s are likely to ask her if everything is ok. Men walk into a building site looking sad and the other men think what’s wrong will that cunt, he must’ve of gotten the ride last night. I’m trying not to make this a long post as not to bore yous. I’m weak and I WAS but not anymore ashamed of how I felt, how I cried for little or no reason, how I’d wake up disappointed in the morning to find myself alive with another day to battle. Go to yoyr to doctor what do they give you? 28 fucking tablets! Well now in my hand I’ve enough tablets to take an overdose. What does it say on the box? “These drugs may cause suicidal thoughts”. Doctor tells u to come back in 28 days. Then what does the doctor do. Ups the dose to a stronger one.causing u to feel numb. No fucks give. If I going to the doctor tomorrow with a drink problem I’ve AA to turn to. Same with a drug problem. Automatically given contact and details or a support group. Go with depression and ur given enough drugs to end your life. I was at a lake back early this year, a cold wet Sunday morning. Oh god i swear I never felt as peaceful in years known my pain was about to end. But somehow the stupidest of thing popped into my head. I’d promised a old lady I’d do something for her. So I left to go to her with the plan to return to the lake. Not for a minute didn’t I think of the pain I would be passing onto my family. So people. If you do feel sad and full of pain I want yous to remember this. Ending ur life won’t end that pain. Your only passing it onto many many others. Please reach out for help. I didn’t for over 5 years. 5 long fucking years feeling ashamed. Today I tell my story because it’s my story. Not yours, it’s my story and I’m a very proud man to tell yous all. I’M WEAK but I will make it to tomorrow and I’ll face my fucking demons head on and look that tramp square in the eyes and beat the mother fucker. Inbox open to any men afraid to tell a loved one. Sorry ladies I know nothing about lady’s mental health so im not going to pretend I will understand ur sorry. Sorry for the long text.

JASUS man. I take my hat off to you, big time. If we could have gif on here I'd have 1 for you. So all I can do if stand up & give you a clapping ovation. As you've been there & worn the T-shirt. Good for you & your right in everything you said.

That actually took me over an hour to write. Few tears got involved "

Shed a few tears myself reading it.

I can empathise with your tots.

And reflected, at times I feel the same

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thanks to OP for starting this. Something I wanted to do myself but didn’t know how to. every 3 in 4 suicides being men. Lady’s bad news. Some of us big strong men aren’t that strong. We’re weak but yous can be forgiven for not knowing that. Why. Because us men hide it. We’re ashamed to show it. Why. Because we’re told to man up and stop acting the wee girl from a very young age. A woman walks into the work place looking sad. The other lady’s are likely to ask her if everything is ok. Men walk into a building site looking sad and the other men think what’s wrong will that cunt, he must’ve of gotten the ride last night. I’m trying not to make this a long post as not to bore yous. I’m weak and I WAS but not anymore ashamed of how I felt, how I cried for little or no reason, how I’d wake up disappointed in the morning to find myself alive with another day to battle. Go to yoyr to doctor what do they give you? 28 fucking tablets! Well now in my hand I’ve enough tablets to take an overdose. What does it say on the box? “These drugs may cause suicidal thoughts”. Doctor tells u to come back in 28 days. Then what does the doctor do. Ups the dose to a stronger one.causing u to feel numb. No fucks give. If I going to the doctor tomorrow with a drink problem I’ve AA to turn to. Same with a drug problem. Automatically given contact and details or a support group. Go with depression and ur given enough drugs to end your life. I was at a lake back early this year, a cold wet Sunday morning. Oh god i swear I never felt as peaceful in years known my pain was about to end. But somehow the stupidest of thing popped into my head. I’d promised a old lady I’d do something for her. So I left to go to her with the plan to return to the lake. Not for a minute didn’t I think of the pain I would be passing onto my family. So people. If you do feel sad and full of pain I want yous to remember this. Ending ur life won’t end that pain. Your only passing it onto many many others. Please reach out for help. I didn’t for over 5 years. 5 long fucking years feeling ashamed. Today I tell my story because it’s my story. Not yours, it’s my story and I’m a very proud man to tell yous all. I’M WEAK but I will make it to tomorrow and I’ll face my fucking demons head on and look that tramp square in the eyes and beat the mother fucker. Inbox open to any men afraid to tell a loved one. Sorry ladies I know nothing about lady’s mental health so im not going to pretend I will understand ur sorry. Sorry for the long text. "

I'm here in tears reading your text, thank you so much for sharing your story, and again thank you lolly for starting this thread. It maybe a sexsite but we are all humans with our own stories to share x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thanks to OP for starting this. Something I wanted to do myself but didn’t know how to. every 3 in 4 suicides being men. Lady’s bad news. Some of us big strong men aren’t that strong. We’re weak but yous can be forgiven for not knowing that. Why. Because us men hide it. We’re ashamed to show it. Why. Because we’re told to man up and stop acting the wee girl from a very young age. A woman walks into the work place looking sad. The other lady’s are likely to ask her if everything is ok. Men walk into a building site looking sad and the other men think what’s wrong will that cunt, he must’ve of gotten the ride last night. I’m trying not to make this a long post as not to bore yous. I’m weak and I WAS but not anymore ashamed of how I felt, how I cried for little or no reason, how I’d wake up disappointed in the morning to find myself alive with another day to battle. Go to yoyr to doctor what do they give you? 28 fucking tablets! Well now in my hand I’ve enough tablets to take an overdose. What does it say on the box? “These drugs may cause suicidal thoughts”. Doctor tells u to come back in 28 days. Then what does the doctor do. Ups the dose to a stronger one.causing u to feel numb. No fucks give. If I going to the doctor tomorrow with a drink problem I’ve AA to turn to. Same with a drug problem. Automatically given contact and details or a support group. Go with depression and ur given enough drugs to end your life. I was at a lake back early this year, a cold wet Sunday morning. Oh god i swear I never felt as peaceful in years known my pain was about to end. But somehow the stupidest of thing popped into my head. I’d promised a old lady I’d do something for her. So I left to go to her with the plan to return to the lake. Not for a minute didn’t I think of the pain I would be passing onto my family. So people. If you do feel sad and full of pain I want yous to remember this. Ending ur life won’t end that pain. Your only passing it onto many many others. Please reach out for help. I didn’t for over 5 years. 5 long fucking years feeling ashamed. Today I tell my story because it’s my story. Not yours, it’s my story and I’m a very proud man to tell yous all. I’M WEAK but I will make it to tomorrow and I’ll face my fucking demons head on and look that tramp square in the eyes and beat the mother fucker. Inbox open to any men afraid to tell a loved one. Sorry ladies I know nothing about lady’s mental health so im not going to pretend I will understand ur sorry. Sorry for the long text. "

Thank you for been honest, if more people were honest and open about they are feeling the world would be a better place x

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"Thanks to OP for starting this. Something I wanted to do myself but didn’t know how to. every 3 in 4 suicides being men. Lady’s bad news. Some of us big strong men aren’t that strong. We’re weak but yous can be forgiven for not knowing that. Why. Because us men hide it. We’re ashamed to show it. Why. Because we’re told to man up and stop acting the wee girl from a very young age. A woman walks into the work place looking sad. The other lady’s are likely to ask her if everything is ok. Men walk into a building site looking sad and the other men think what’s wrong will that cunt, he must’ve of gotten the ride last night. I’m trying not to make this a long post as not to bore yous. I’m weak and I WAS but not anymore ashamed of how I felt, how I cried for little or no reason, how I’d wake up disappointed in the morning to find myself alive with another day to battle. Go to yoyr to doctor what do they give you? 28 fucking tablets! Well now in my hand I’ve enough tablets to take an overdose. What does it say on the box? “These drugs may cause suicidal thoughts”. Doctor tells u to come back in 28 days. Then what does the doctor do. Ups the dose to a stronger one.causing u to feel numb. No fucks give. If I going to the doctor tomorrow with a drink problem I’ve AA to turn to. Same with a drug problem. Automatically given contact and details or a support group. Go with depression and ur given enough drugs to end your life. I was at a lake back early this year, a cold wet Sunday morning. Oh god i swear I never felt as peaceful in years known my pain was about to end. But somehow the stupidest of thing popped into my head. I’d promised a old lady I’d do something for her. So I left to go to her with the plan to return to the lake. Not for a minute didn’t I think of the pain I would be passing onto my family. So people. If you do feel sad and full of pain I want yous to remember this. Ending ur life won’t end that pain. Your only passing it onto many many others. Please reach out for help. I didn’t for over 5 years. 5 long fucking years feeling ashamed. Today I tell my story because it’s my story. Not yours, it’s my story and I’m a very proud man to tell yous all. I’M WEAK but I will make it to tomorrow and I’ll face my fucking demons head on and look that tramp square in the eyes and beat the mother fucker. Inbox open to any men afraid to tell a loved one. Sorry ladies I know nothing about lady’s mental health so im not going to pretend I will understand ur sorry. Sorry for the long text.

Thank you for been honest, if more people were honest and open about they are feeling the world would be a better place x"

Ya,that's true alright.

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By *om TangoMan
over a year ago

aughnacloy monaghan area

May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”.

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By *electableicecreamMan
over a year ago

The West

Boom.

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I opened another thread there. A suggestion for the men on here..."

What thread was that lolly

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

There's nothing weak in sharing how you feel lads and please don't see it as such, it's quite the opposite. Much respect to those of you who have shared your stories

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By *ootlooseMan
over a year ago

kildare

Thankyou lolly for sharing that information and bringing it to the attention of us all.

There is not much I can add to this as a lot has been said by everybody and they all covered a lot especially Bull4 and others.

And your right Bull, ladies support other when one is feeling down and as lads we don’t offer each other that support or ask that vital question’ are you ok’ do u want to talk about it’

I too have gone through some horrible shit in the last couple of years, but I had a couple of people I knew that were very logical in their thinking, and they helped me to no end!

LADS- REACH OUT PLEASE- To many GOOD men lost to suicide because they felt isolated and no one to talk too.

Family court also has a huge impact on men/fathers that struggle to get rights to their children it’s the most devastating thing that can happen to a good man. I’m involved in a group thats helping and pointing fathers in the right direction, you’re not on your own anymore there is help there for you.

REACHING OUT IS THE FIRST STEP TO RECOVERY.

If anyone wants to talk.. just contact me.. big love to you all…

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

In all seriousness I don't think fab is a good place for men who are struggling with their mental health. There WILL be a lot of rejection and people ignoring you. You need to be very thick skinned. Fab is not going to change. If the rejection is getting a guy down then this is the wrong place to be hanging out.

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By *indenMan
over a year ago

Naas which is South West of Dublin


"Wow oh wow oh wow.

I'm struggling. Really really struggling.7

I know I am.

I've being seeing a counsellor but not finding it much help tbh.

I only searched the forums earlier today for this subject and low and behold a thread starts about it"

You should consider looking for another counsellor, you may need to speak to a few before finding a good fit, stick with it.

Well done for the thread Lolly….

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”. "

Unfortunately sometimes even been polite and replying can result in abuse for saying not interested.

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”.

Unfortunately sometimes even been polite and replying can result in abuse for saying not interested."

That's another side to it already.

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By *om TangoMan
over a year ago

aughnacloy monaghan area


"In all seriousness I don't think fab is a good place for men who are struggling with their mental health. There WILL be a lot of rejection and people ignoring you. You need to be very thick skinned. Fab is not going to change. If the rejection is getting a guy down then this is the wrong place to be hanging out. "

And that’s ur opinion. And u have a right to your own opinion. Personal I think fab is the perfect place to open up because we’re already hiding behind a mask. So we can be more open. Do u feel somewhat uncomfortable about the subject? Maybe try drop your ego a small bit and open yourself up to your weaknesses. I’ve watched your comments on threads over the past few weeks and I can’t help but think “I wonder what’s going on in his background “.

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By *om TangoMan
over a year ago

aughnacloy monaghan area


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”.

Unfortunately sometimes even been polite and replying can result in abuse for saying not interested."

I get that. Really I do. But that’s just them dropping their mask. Only then u can judge them. If and only if it happens I will reply. Thank u for your reply. It means a lot u took time out to message me back. I wish u well.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

I don't feel uncomfortable talking about mental health at all I'm not sure what gave you that impression. I just feel this place is very hard on single men in particular, especially what you yourself bring up about not getting replies and the frustration that that brings. I've been a single guy here and I know it can be hard. If you're happy here then I hope you get out of it what you want.

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By *om TangoMan
over a year ago

aughnacloy monaghan area


"In all seriousness I don't think fab is a good place for men who are struggling with their mental health. There WILL be a lot of rejection and people ignoring you. You need to be very thick skinned. Fab is not going to change. If the rejection is getting a guy down then this is the wrong place to be hanging out.

And that’s ur opinion. And u have a right to your own opinion. Personal I think fab is the perfect place to open up because we’re already hiding behind a mask. So we can be more open. Do u feel somewhat uncomfortable about the subject? Maybe try drop your ego a small bit and open yourself up to your weaknesses. I’ve watched your comments on threads over the past few weeks and I can’t help but think “I wonder what’s going on in his background “. "

Opps I’m blocked. Was going to message to see if you’re ok. Guess you don’t like weak men. Sorry if I’ve offended.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

I didn't block you from this thread. I have no idea why I did it must be something some time ago. If you want to say something in private that's ok I'll unblock

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By *om TangoMan
over a year ago

aughnacloy monaghan area


"I didn't block you from this thread. I have no idea why I did it must be something some time ago. If you want to say something in private that's ok I'll unblock"

I won’t bother. If they first to bring something negative to the subject so u might be best to leave aside. Thanks for the offer but. I try to push the negative stuff to the side these days and I do feel so much better for it. Wish u nothing but good luck in the future lad.

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By *indenMan
over a year ago

Naas which is South West of Dublin


"In all seriousness I don't think fab is a good place for men who are struggling with their mental health. There WILL be a lot of rejection and people ignoring you. You need to be very thick skinned. Fab is not going to change. If the rejection is getting a guy down then this is the wrong place to be hanging out.

And that’s ur opinion. And u have a right to your own opinion. Personal I think fab is the perfect place to open up because we’re already hiding behind a mask. So we can be more open. Do u feel somewhat uncomfortable about the subject? Maybe try drop your ego a small bit and open yourself up to your weaknesses. I’ve watched your comments on threads over the past few weeks and I can’t help but think “I wonder what’s going on in his background “.

Opps I’m blocked. Was going to message to see if you’re ok. Guess you don’t like weak men. Sorry if I’ve offended. "

I’ve read your previous posts and well done for sharing but, but why constantly refer to yourself as weak?

Not having a go, a genuine question.

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By *om TangoMan
over a year ago

aughnacloy monaghan area


"In all seriousness I don't think fab is a good place for men who are struggling with their mental health. There WILL be a lot of rejection and people ignoring you. You need to be very thick skinned. Fab is not going to change. If the rejection is getting a guy down then this is the wrong place to be hanging out.

And that’s ur opinion. And u have a right to your own opinion. Personal I think fab is the perfect place to open up because we’re already hiding behind a mask. So we can be more open. Do u feel somewhat uncomfortable about the subject? Maybe try drop your ego a small bit and open yourself up to your weaknesses. I’ve watched your comments on threads over the past few weeks and I can’t help but think “I wonder what’s going on in his background “.

Opps I’m blocked. Was going to message to see if you’re ok. Guess you don’t like weak men. Sorry if I’ve offended.

I’ve read your previous posts and well done for sharing but, but why constantly refer to yourself as weak?

Not having a go, a genuine question."

.

No problem. Right I’m a man. I’m the head of the house as such. I’m the fella that’s to protect the others. Actually I cant go ahead with the rest of this. I’m out. Sorry

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By *indenMan
over a year ago

Naas which is South West of Dublin


"In all seriousness I don't think fab is a good place for men who are struggling with their mental health. There WILL be a lot of rejection and people ignoring you. You need to be very thick skinned. Fab is not going to change. If the rejection is getting a guy down then this is the wrong place to be hanging out.

And that’s ur opinion. And u have a right to your own opinion. Personal I think fab is the perfect place to open up because we’re already hiding behind a mask. So we can be more open. Do u feel somewhat uncomfortable about the subject? Maybe try drop your ego a small bit and open yourself up to your weaknesses. I’ve watched your comments on threads over the past few weeks and I can’t help but think “I wonder what’s going on in his background “.

Opps I’m blocked. Was going to message to see if you’re ok. Guess you don’t like weak men. Sorry if I’ve offended.

I’ve read your previous posts and well done for sharing but, but why constantly refer to yourself as weak?

Not having a go, a genuine question..

No problem. Right I’m a man. I’m the head of the house as such. I’m the fella that’s to protect the others. Actually I cant go ahead with the rest of this. I’m out. Sorry"

Until you change that mindset you won’t change anything else.

But good luck on your journey…..

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By *ootlooseMan
over a year ago

kildare

Well that went off track unfortunately.

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"I opened another thread there. A suggestion for the men on here...

What thread was that lolly"

It was about Men's Metal Health. It seem's to have disappeared from the forum.

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By *electableicecreamMan
over a year ago

The West

One of the biggest things that came out of COVID for mental health was funding for free counselling sessions.

Pretty much anyone in the country can now access anonymous online counseling for free for a minimum of six weeks.

Turn2me is a good one.

Sometimes you need to sit in the dark. Sometimes you need eat or drink or jerk off. That's ok. Telling someone your doing it is ok too. Misery loves company.

My baseline strategy for when I've hit the bottom is to start by taking cheap vitamin tablets. I can be utterly adverse to self care when I'm down so I start with the smallest possible act.

One vit pill a day is one thing you did every that's good for you. A week of that is enough self discipline for a reward. Maybe after two weeks of that you might feel like going for a 4min walk. Reward yourself for every win.

Allow yourself to lose and grieve. Sit when you need to. Move when you can. Just go easy on yourself.

Start small. Go slow. Take time.

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"One of the biggest things that came out of COVID for mental health was funding for free counselling sessions.

Pretty much anyone in the country can now access anonymous online counseling for free for a minimum of six weeks.

Turn2me is a good one.

Sometimes you need to sit in the dark. Sometimes you need eat or drink or jerk off. That's ok. Telling someone your doing it is ok too. Misery loves company.

My baseline strategy for when I've hit the bottom is to start by taking cheap vitamin tablets. I can be utterly adverse to self care when I'm down so I start with the smallest possible act.

One vit pill a day is one thing you did every that's good for you. A week of that is enough self discipline for a reward. Maybe after two weeks of that you might feel like going for a 4min walk. Reward yourself for every win.

Allow yourself to lose and grieve. Sit when you need to. Move when you can. Just go easy on yourself.

Start small. Go slow. Take time."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The first step in anyones mental health journey to recovery is admitting your struggling, that will be one of the biggest step anyone will take.

The next step is asking for help, there's no quick fix and one thing I've learnt is, it is a ongoing journey, I think the more we talk about , the more we can open up to each other the better.

And we all matter to someone, on our low days we not feel it or believe it but someone out there has good memories of you and things you have done.

And in all honesty all that really matters is you, your family and friends.

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By *ollypop9 OP   Woman
over a year ago

wouldn't you like to know


"I opened another thread there. A suggestion for the men on here...

What thread was that lolly

It was about Men's Metal Health. It seem's to have disappeared from the forum. "

I'll try again and not mention the platform, I think that's why it was removed...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”.

Unfortunately sometimes even been polite and replying can result in abuse for saying not interested.

"

: I think you will find it's extremely unlikely the person respectfully asking for a coffee in a public place would reply with abuse, the "wana suck my cock" message senders are more likely to reply with abuse when turned down.

And honestly would you actually reply to a man reaching out asking for a meet because he was lonely?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 17/09/23 22:16:56]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”.

Unfortunately sometimes even been polite and replying can result in abuse for saying not interested.

: I think you will find it's extremely unlikely the person respectfully asking for a coffee in a public place would reply with abuse, the "wana suck my cock" message senders are more likely to reply with abuse when turned down.

And honestly would you actually reply to a man reaching out asking for a meet because he was lonely? "

If someone asked me for a coffee and chat , if it suited me I would say yes.

I like many on here have gotten polite opening messages to only receive nasty massages if they are told not interested.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”.

Unfortunately sometimes even been polite and replying can result in abuse for saying not interested.

: I think you will find it's extremely unlikely the person respectfully asking for a coffee in a public place would reply with abuse, the "wana suck my cock" message senders are more likely to reply with abuse when turned down.

And honestly would you actually reply to a man reaching out asking for a meet because he was lonely?

If someone asked me for a coffee and chat , if it suited me I would say yes.

I like many on here have gotten polite opening messages to only receive nasty massages if they are told not interested."

I wouldn't even reply to a nasty mesg

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By *electableicecreamMan
over a year ago

The West

I'd imagine there is a correlation between the kind of men who send vulgar messages and poor mental health.

Any man spending his time doing that is not in a good place.

And fab in general is a magnet for those seeking risky or unconventional sexual experiences.

A lot of people here are clearly liberated in their sexuality and thinking but others will be here because perhaps something life changing happened and they are responding to that.

Fab is chaotic and exciting. You'd want to me mad to be here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”.

Unfortunately sometimes even been polite and replying can result in abuse for saying not interested.

: I think you will find it's extremely unlikely the person respectfully asking for a coffee in a public place would reply with abuse, the "wana suck my cock" message senders are more likely to reply with abuse when turned down.

And honestly would you actually reply to a man reaching out asking for a meet because he was lonely?

If someone asked me for a coffee and chat , if it suited me I would say yes.

I like many on here have gotten polite opening messages to only receive nasty massages if they are told not interested."

I honestly can't understand why someone who sent a respectful initial message would then send a nasty reply if they got a polite no thanks. Why would their nature change after a reply. #confused but not saying it's not possible I just don't understand it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”.

Unfortunately sometimes even been polite and replying can result in abuse for saying not interested.

: I think you will find it's extremely unlikely the person respectfully asking for a coffee in a public place would reply with abuse, the "wana suck my cock" message senders are more likely to reply with abuse when turned down.

And honestly would you actually reply to a man reaching out asking for a meet because he was lonely?

If someone asked me for a coffee and chat , if it suited me I would say yes.

I like many on here have gotten polite opening messages to only receive nasty massages if they are told not interested.

I honestly can't understand why someone who sent a respectful initial message would then send a nasty reply if they got a polite no thanks. Why would their nature change after a reply. #confused but not saying it's not possible I just don't understand it"

Oh it happens

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”.

Unfortunately sometimes even been polite and replying can result in abuse for saying not interested.

: I think you will find it's extremely unlikely the person respectfully asking for a coffee in a public place would reply with abuse, the "wana suck my cock" message senders are more likely to reply with abuse when turned down.

And honestly would you actually reply to a man reaching out asking for a meet because he was lonely?

If someone asked me for a coffee and chat , if it suited me I would say yes.

I like many on here have gotten polite opening messages to only receive nasty massages if they are told not interested.

I honestly can't understand why someone who sent a respectful initial message would then send a nasty reply if they got a polite no thanks. Why would their nature change after a reply. #confused but not saying it's not possible I just don't understand it"

Refusal often offends here..people can change like a light switch when not getting what they think they're entitled to..sad but true in my experience

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"May I just add. Yous will be sick of me yet. Ladies and couples. I know this was talked about before. Maybe I can get yous to rethink something. See when one of us men sits and writes a message on here to yous saying something like. “Hi guys/girl. Just after reading your profile and I like. I would be very interested in maybe arranging to meeting in public for a coffee so get to know each other” that message means we want to show u respect by offering to met in public for your safety concerns. Please if not interested just say I’m not interested. There is nothing more soul destroying that seeing a message has been read and nothing back. Right I get it. Yous get messages like come suck my big dick of I will fuck u like u have never been fucked before. I understand why u won’t reply to that. But jaysus if we’re asking for a coffee meet there is I’d safely say on my behalf the message should be. “ hi, I’m feeling a bit lonely and not very confident at the minute and wondering if u would be so kind to agree to meet for a coffee to kinda boast my loneliness and confidence up a bit”.

Unfortunately sometimes even been polite and replying can result in abuse for saying not interested.

: I think you will find it's extremely unlikely the person respectfully asking for a coffee in a public place would reply with abuse, the "wana suck my cock" message senders are more likely to reply with abuse when turned down.

And honestly would you actually reply to a man reaching out asking for a meet because he was lonely?

If someone asked me for a coffee and chat , if it suited me I would say yes.

I like many on here have gotten polite opening messages to only receive nasty massages if they are told not interested.

I honestly can't understand why someone who sent a respectful initial message would then send a nasty reply if they got a polite no thanks. Why would their nature change after a reply. #confused but not saying it's not possible I just don't understand it

Refusal often offends here..people can change like a light switch when not getting what they think they're entitled to..sad but true in my experience "

Hmm Fab might not be a good place for anyone who can't handle rejection, it's part and parcel of being a guy on here.

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By *electableicecreamMan
over a year ago

The West

Mental health ctd

If you're sick to your eyeballs of people telling you to get some exercise to cure your depression then you are not alone in the world.

Honestly every single picture on Tinder has a woman on top of a mountain. It just makes me feel inadequate as I'd rather photograph the mountain than walk up it.

Positive steps towards mental health recovery can be very small and still be effective.

I just feel like it bears repeating that you don't have to move the whole mountain even though you feel the weight of it on top of you. You don't even have to climb it or conquer it.

You are the feckin mountain.

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By *ollypop9 OP   Woman
over a year ago

wouldn't you like to know

Was asked to bump this

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"Mental health ctd

If you're sick to your eyeballs of people telling you to get some exercise to cure your depression then you are not alone in the world.

Honestly every single picture on Tinder has a woman on top of a mountain. It just makes me feel inadequate as I'd rather photograph the mountain than walk up it.

Positive steps towards mental health recovery can be very small and still be effective.

I just feel like it bears repeating that you don't have to move the whole mountain even though you feel the weight of it on top of you. You don't even have to climb it or conquer it.

You are the feckin mountain."

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By *XlalaXXWoman
over a year ago

tipperary

I think we need to stop looking at our phones

For a start

Jesus what is the world coming to

Go out and meet people talk say hello

No wonder our mental health is suffering when the most basic form of communication that we learn from when we are a couple of weeks old people can’t do .

It’s heartbreaking

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"I think we need to stop looking at our phones

For a start

Jesus what is the world coming to

Go out and meet people talk say hello

No wonder our mental health is suffering when the most basic form of communication that we learn from when we are a couple of weeks old people can’t do .

It’s heartbreaking

"

True

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By *heBlowinsCouple
over a year ago

West Cork


"You are the feckin mountain."

T-shirt or funky cross stitch idea right there - thanks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think we need to stop looking at our phones

For a start

Jesus what is the world coming to

Go out and meet people talk say hello

No wonder our mental health is suffering when the most basic form of communication that we learn from when we are a couple of weeks old people can’t do .

It’s heartbreaking

"

Heard today that the EU has found 20% of us feel lonely most or all of the time.

We have so much access to people but we are so isolated from people. How many that posted on this thread reached out to friends this weekend?

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By *WEETESTSTRAWBERRYFOR1Woman
over a year ago

Clare

Great post fair play . Never be afraid to talk . Sometimes talking to a stranger can be easier

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By *ittlebigladMan
over a year ago

Kilkenny

Great post,as a man myself,we never talk about this subject.

Last year I finally realised I needed help,got it and feel very good now.with out it I don't know what would have happened,but we all need to chat more about it,it does not make us weak or anything.

Men grow up and chat.

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By *ingpot!Man
over a year ago

West Cork


"I think we need to stop looking at our phones

For a start

Jesus what is the world coming to

Go out and meet people talk say hello

No wonder our mental health is suffering when the most basic form of communication that we learn from when we are a couple of weeks old people can’t do .

It’s heartbreaking

Heard today that the EU has found 20% of us feel lonely most or all of the time.

We have so much access to people but we are so isolated from people. How many that posted on this thread reached out to friends this weekend? "

I reckon that's a low estimate

I can barely imagine life without my wife and we're more insular and need less socialisation than many so don't have many friends.. forcing ourselves out of our comfort zone to spend time with others can be exhausting but can be surprisingly soul enriching with good company

I know fab is predominantly about sex but sometimes some of just want companionship and cuddles

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By *ootlooseMan
over a year ago

kildare

To everyone out there that struggling just talk.

Lads especially were seen to handle hardships and struggles on our own, to remain insular and deal with it on our own. Don’t do this, help and support each other like women do. We need to start talking boys.. stagnation stop’s growth. Reach out lads there’s no shame in it at all, it’s not a sign of weakness but growth within yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think we need to stop looking at our phones

For a start

Jesus what is the world coming to

Go out and meet people talk say hello

No wonder our mental health is suffering when the most basic form of communication that we learn from when we are a couple of weeks old people can’t do .

It’s heartbreaking

Heard today that the EU has found 20% of us feel lonely most or all of the time.

We have so much access to people but we are so isolated from people. How many that posted on this thread reached out to friends this weekend?

I reckon that's a low estimate

I can barely imagine life without my wife and we're more insular and need less socialisation than many so don't have many friends.. forcing ourselves out of our comfort zone to spend time with others can be exhausting but can be surprisingly soul enriching with good company

I know fab is predominantly about sex but sometimes some of just want companionship and cuddles "

I reckon it's a higher percentage wonder how many were surveyed.

And I definitely prefer companionship and cuddles than sex

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By *hinbutlong1Man
over a year ago

Trim

Theres nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about lads just f*cking talk to one of your mates or partner someone you trust ..i had two friends who done away with themselves within 3 months of each other and breaks my heart that they never told anyone what they were going through..

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By *XlalaXXWoman
over a year ago

tipperary


"Theres nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about lads just f*cking talk to one of your mates or partner someone you trust ..i had two friends who done away with themselves within 3 months of each other and breaks my heart that they never told anyone what they were going through.. "

God that’s heartbreaking

Hope ur doin ok

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By *ollypop9 OP   Woman
over a year ago

wouldn't you like to know

Was just thinking, if someone would like to add the numbers for helplines in Northern Ireland here, might be useful too...

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By *electableicecreamMan
over a year ago

The West


"You are the feckin mountain.

T-shirt or funky cross stitch idea right there - thanks! "

All credit to Neo and Uri Geller.

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By *ifestyleMan
over a year ago

Omagh & Dublin

A few Ni contacts for mens mental health are

Aware info@aware-ni.org

Action mental Health 02891828494

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By *ind PaddyMan
over a year ago

South County Dublin


"In all seriousness I don't think fab is a good place for men who are struggling with their mental health. There WILL be a lot of rejection and people ignoring you. You need to be very thick skinned. Fab is not going to change. If the rejection is getting a guy down then this is

the wrong place to be hanging out. "

Very true. If you're not feeling well you need to talk to your GP who can refer you on. Takes a lot of courage to talk about mental health. If you are not getting meets on here think about attending a social. Some of the socials are for non verified. Fair play lolly for this thread. Look after yourself. Try the local parkruns in your area. They are held every Saturday at 9.30am. You can walk the 5k route. Most parkruns have a tailwalker whose job it is to finish last.

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By *ngel and EvilCouple
over a year ago

Belfast

OP great thread. Thank you for posting. Love it. Love you xxx

Angel x

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By *t777Woman
over a year ago

close by

Brilliant thread, very helpful. Well done OP

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By *exbombABCMan
over a year ago

BLANCHARDSTOWN

Lolly I think this is a very important topic that you have put up which isn’t talked about enough so I really appreciate you putting up and sure dozens of people here feel the same. I’ve dealt with depression, suicidal thoughts and other things, thank god I’m better now and dealt with it the right way don’t get me wrong I still have my down days but I learned how to pull through and come out on top.

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"Lolly I think this is a very important topic that you have put up which isn’t talked about enough so I really appreciate you putting up and sure dozens of people here feel the same. I’ve dealt with depression, suicidal thoughts and other things, thank god I’m better now and dealt with it the right way don’t get me wrong I still have my down days but I learned how to pull through and come out on top. "

Good stuff, glad to hear it.

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By *exbombABCMan
over a year ago

BLANCHARDSTOWN

Thanks irishguy it was a tough time in my life a lot of shit was happening in my life. I’m an open book so if anyone wants to talk I’m here and willing to tell what I went through and if they are comfortable enough to exchange stories I’ll listen and try to give advice

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By *rish_GuyMan
over a year ago

Foxford


"Thanks irishguy it was a tough time in my life a lot of shit was happening in my life. I’m an open book so if anyone wants to talk I’m here and willing to tell what I went through and if they are comfortable enough to exchange stories I’ll listen and try to give advice "

Your welcome.

Ya I'm sure it & they're was alright. The mainthing is your better & still here to tell the tail(so to speak).

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