FabSwingers.com forum: Your worst lonely hearts ad

By *asual777 OP Man
over a year ago

i travel all over

Make it impossible for anyone in their right mind to reply…..

From the lounge

Guy in his mid 40s looking for a lady in her mid 40s to meet when it suits him and do what it suits him. Completely emotionally unavailable and not into foreplay

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By *arry and AnnCouple
over a year ago

Louth

Couple here, seeking mid 20s female for Barry to use for his birthday.

Really give him the hottest, filthiest, sloppiest three and a half minutes of his life.

Must be okay with heights, enclosed spaces and leather.

If you want to cum too thats fine but it'll probably be in the taxi on the way home.

Everything will be recorded on webcams we wont point out to you.

Also you must bring snacks

How could anyone refuse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Late 40s male seeking woman to satisfy his needs whenever he chooses. Must be available at any hour of the day or night, and be prepared to do housework after he rolls over and goes to sleep. Couldn't care less if you had a good time.

Must also hate dogs.

...

I think that one would win the "fuck no" competition

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By *om TangoMan
over a year ago

aughnacloy monaghan area

Male seeking female for outside fun. Must be into taking risks and have own transportation. Married cheating wife’s to the front.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Male seeking female for outside fun. Must be into taking risks and have own transportation. Married cheating wife’s to the front. "

See now, I can imagine a few who would respond to that.

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By *arry and AnnCouple
over a year ago

Louth

"Male seeking female for outside fun. Must be into taking risks and have own transportation. Married cheating wife’s to the front.

See now, I can imagine a few who would respond to that. "

Was about to say the same

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By *om TangoMan
over a year ago

aughnacloy monaghan area

"Male seeking female for outside fun. Must be into taking risks and have own transportation. Married cheating wife’s to the front.

See now, I can imagine a few who would respond to that.

Was about to say the same

Wouldn’t think so. Don’t think any woman would be brave enough.

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By *arry and AnnCouple
over a year ago

Louth

"Male seeking female for outside fun. Must be into taking risks and have own transportation. Married cheating wife’s to the front.

See now, I can imagine a few who would respond to that.

Was about to say the same

Wouldn’t think so. Don’t think any woman would be brave enough. "

You'd be suprised

This is pretty much how i met Ann

(minus the cheating wife part)

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Sure just read my profile....

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By *electableicecreamMan
over a year ago

The West

I'm looking for a woman and I'm not fussy. If you have a heart beat that will probably do. My erectile disfunction isn't a problem for me so you can just do whatever you like. I don't do kissing or any of that stuff.

Mostly I just want someone to binge drink with until I pass out so please be a dear and clean up a bit on your way out.

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

At least ye're honest about it lads

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

Need someone to fuck.Send me pics of your hole and I'll choose the winner.

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By *amsevenMan
over a year ago

cork

Sexy married mute with stamina and hight heels wanted.

Manual handling certificate and knowledge of orienteering an advantage

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By *asual777 OP Man
over a year ago

i travel all over

Some of these are bad

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By *arry and AnnCouple
over a year ago

Louth

"Some of these are bad "

Thank you

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By *electableicecreamMan
over a year ago

The West

"Some of these are bad "

I do try

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By *arrot_in_a_boxCouple
over a year ago

kinda dublin

Once read a lonely hearts advert in Irelands Own, where the gentleman was seeking preferable a Canadian lady in Donegal, who loves Country & Western music, Dolly Parton, and Milk.

Thought it was very oddly specific

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By *ohn Boy 2024Man
over a year ago

Belfast

"Once read a lonely hearts advert in Irelands Own, where the gentleman was seeking preferable a Canadian lady in Donegal, who loves Country & Western music, Dolly Parton, and Milk.

Thought it was very oddly specific

Semi skimmed or full fat? Leaves a lot open to interpretation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Once read a lonely hearts advert in Irelands Own, where the gentleman was seeking preferable a Canadian lady in Donegal, who loves Country & Western music, Dolly Parton, and Milk.

Thought it was very oddly specific

I really hope he found her!

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By *rankbMan
over a year ago

around

Man in seventies seeks young woman to mind house and comply with wifely duties, 100 acre farm, good milking stock and plenty of road frontage available.

Farmers journal

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

"Man in seventies seeks young woman to mind house and comply with wifely duties, 100 acre farm, good milking stock and plenty of road frontage available.

Farmers journal"

Road frontage? I'm there

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By *ay_Gatsby_D4Man
over a year ago

Ballsbridge, City Centre

“Jaded shortarse seeks somewhere warm to put his cock”

Snap me up ladiez

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By *DSGCouple
over a year ago

That place in

Once your breathing and have your own teeth and hair,gsoh require

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By *astelloWoman
over a year ago

Far far away

Self obsessed narcissist seeks mute 6ft3 rugby lad to do odd jobs and service my needs regularly.

Manual handling and health and safety certs essential.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Self obsessed narcissist seeks mute 6ft3 rugby lad to do odd jobs and service my needs regularly.

Manual handling and health and safety certs essential. "

See, I see that one getting responses too

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By *leasurer77Man
over a year ago

Athlone

"At least ye're honest about it lads

Brilliant profile pic

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By *leasurer77Man
over a year ago

Athlone

Man with irration fear of dentists and tooth brushes seeks lady for long kissing sessions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Man with irration fear of dentists and tooth brushes seeks lady for long kissing sessions."

Ooh. That one might just take the prize.

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By *leasurer77Man
over a year ago

Athlone

"Man with irration fear of dentists and tooth brushes seeks lady for long kissing sessions.

Ooh. That one might just take the prize. "

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By *astelloWoman
over a year ago

Far far away

"Man with irration fear of dentists and tooth brushes seeks lady for long kissing sessions."

Very good.. Who doesn't love funky breath

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

"At least ye're honest about it lads

Brilliant profile pic

Why thank you kind sir

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By *indenMan
over a year ago

Naas which is South West of Dublin

Willing to sleep in the wet spot, application via PM…..

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"Willing to sleep in the wet spot, application via PM….."

Funny how the wet spot always ends up on the mans side of the bed

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By *indenMan
over a year ago

Naas which is South West of Dublin

"Willing to sleep in the wet spot, application via PM…..

Funny how the wet spot always ends up on the mans side of the bed

Even worse when he’s on his own……

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By *andytownMan
over a year ago

Gods Own Country

Does yer da own a brewery

Do you fcuk on the 1st date

And do you have a sister

Apply within

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please sleep with me.

Please. Pretty please. I'm so lonely. I haven't slept with anyone in a very long time.

Please do me the favor of having sex with me.

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By *indenMan
over a year ago

Naas which is South West of Dublin

"Does yer da own a brewery

Do you fcuk on the 1st date

And do you have a sister

Apply within

Sounds like a Kevin “Bloody” Wilson song…..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Male, comes from Eastern European nobility, enjoys the finer things in life (but not a fan of red wine). Not a morning person, prefer the nightlife. Looking for a full-blooded woman who enjoys vigorous necking. Must like bats.

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By *andytownMan
over a year ago

Gods Own Country

"Does yer da own a brewery

Do you fcuk on the 1st date

And do you have a sister

Apply within

Sounds like a Kevin “Bloody” Wilson song…..

Spot on

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