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"Anyone experiencing fab fatigue- I’m so drained from some of my recent experiences. FAB used to be my safe place and don’t get me wrong I have met some wonderful forever friends here. However, recently the playground just seems to be getting bigger - nasty things behind peoples backs - people reporting information to people they have no business doing. The trust and openness was what I loved about FAB but more and more that seems to be lost. Jealousy, shaming, judgment, manipulation - I’m tired and want to know how others have dealt with it. Did you leave and come back refreshed- new eyes new perspective? My confidence I once gained here has been shattered from recent events - I want and need my mojo back. " All the nasty stuff is why we don't engage with a lot of the stuff going on here especially the egos and the sycophants they attract. We keep ourselves to ourselves a lot of the time. Honestly better off hiding for a bit. Mute anything to do with fab and take a break. | |||
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"Anyone experiencing fab fatigue- I’m so drained from some of my recent experiences. FAB used to be my safe place and don’t get me wrong I have met some wonderful forever friends here. However, recently the playground just seems to be getting bigger - nasty things behind peoples backs - people reporting information to people they have no business doing. The trust and openness was what I loved about FAB but more and more that seems to be lost. Jealousy, shaming, judgment, manipulation - I’m tired and want to know how others have dealt with it. Did you leave and come back refreshed- new eyes new perspective? My confidence I once gained here has been shattered from recent events - I want and need my mojo back. All the nasty stuff is why we don't engage with a lot of the stuff going on here especially the egos and the sycophants they attract. We keep ourselves to ourselves a lot of the time. Honestly better off hiding for a bit. Mute anything to do with fab and take a break. " This ![]() | |||
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"Feck em all .... rise above that petty shit and you do you... who gives a fuck what dopes say to eachother? Not a great place to be sourcing your confidence if im honest! Having said that ... ignore all the gossip... and if people are talking about you in ways you don't like ,,, control who you give info too .... most importantly...fuck em ! ![]() Thanks - as a reserved shy bbw FAB gave me a huge confidence boost - at first. I wasn’t really looking for it here but I did get it here. I’m definitely learning to keep my circle small x | |||
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"Fab is fun if you don't take it too seriously. Sounds like you need a break" Yep x I try not to take it seriously. On certain occasions it can’t be helped. I’ve taken breaks before guess I’m trying to figure out is it time to close my FAB chapter for good. | |||
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" All the nasty stuff is why we don't engage with a lot of the stuff going on here especially the egos and the sycophants they attract. We keep ourselves to ourselves a lot of the time. Honestly better off hiding for a bit. Mute anything to do with fab and take a break. " Until it landed at my doorstep I hadn’t actually seen it, now I can’t unsee it. Time to reflect x | |||
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" All the nasty stuff is why we don't engage with a lot of the stuff going on here especially the egos and the sycophants they attract. We keep ourselves to ourselves a lot of the time. Honestly better off hiding for a bit. Mute anything to do with fab and take a break. Until it landed at my doorstep I hadn’t actually seen it, now I can’t unsee it. Time to reflect x" Sorry to hear that. The asshole minority have a way of fucking stuff up | |||
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"Fab fatigue is real. Taking a break helps but it just gives you space to recharge, it doesn't change the dark side of Fab ![]() I’m wondering too is it harder as a single. I’ve had it before and it wasn’t as bad - I was just meh about it. This time it’s like my blinkers to the dark side have been removed and I can’t unsee that side. I just need to reevaluate I guess x | |||
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" All the nasty stuff is why we don't engage with a lot of the stuff going on here especially the egos and the sycophants they attract. We keep ourselves to ourselves a lot of the time. Honestly better off hiding for a bit. Mute anything to do with fab and take a break. Until it landed at my doorstep I hadn’t actually seen it, now I can’t unsee it. Time to reflect x" I find your Honesty about Confidence gained from fab absolutely refreshing. I believe many of us get a certain amount of confidence from here. It's a very unhealthy way to source our confidence and it's the main reason there are so many eagles on here that wouldn't exist in real life. However it is still very honest of you to admit that it is the case that many of us whether why is there enough get confidence from here. We can never answer anything but the wanting that is in our control is we can change our perception of what we have seen. Maybe try thinking of it from the point of view, Now you are wiser and thus can be safer and stronger. | |||
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"Fab is fun if you don't take it too seriously. Sounds like you need a break Yep x I try not to take it seriously. On certain occasions it can’t be helped. I’ve taken breaks before guess I’m trying to figure out is it time to close my FAB chapter for good. " Nahh giving up on Fab is too extreme, you are better than that. Take a break and see how your life feels. Best of luck in whatever decision you make | |||
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"The fact that you can see the reality of life on Fab means you have gained maturity and the confidence to know your own worth from your engagement with the site. Well done you OP. And yes there are more sycophants than pics with no pants on here but don't worry about them. Let them to suck-up to people who will be their best buddy until someone else grabs their attention. Know who you can trust and enjoy their friendship. Stay on Have fun Fu*k the begrudgers. " You are making one nano person important and you have made many wonderful memories for yourself and others, So enjoy your Circle Keep the wagons close together | |||
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"Anyone experiencing fab fatigue- I’m so drained from some of my recent experiences. FAB used to be my safe place and don’t get me wrong I have met some wonderful forever friends here. However, recently the playground just seems to be getting bigger - nasty things behind peoples backs - people reporting information to people they have no business doing. The trust and openness was what I loved about FAB but more and more that seems to be lost. Jealousy, shaming, judgment, manipulation - I’m tired and want to know how others have dealt with it. Did you leave and come back refreshed- new eyes new perspective? My confidence I once gained here has been shattered from recent events - I want and need my mojo back. All the nasty stuff is why we don't engage with a lot of the stuff going on here especially the egos and the sycophants they attract. We keep ourselves to ourselves a lot of the time. Honestly better off hiding for a bit. Mute anything to do with fab and take a break. " Great advice ! | |||
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"Feck em all .... rise above that petty shit and you do you... who gives a fuck what dopes say to eachother? Not a great place to be sourcing your confidence if im honest! Having said that ... ignore all the gossip... and if people are talking about you in ways you don't like ,,, control who you give info too .... most importantly...fuck em ! ![]() And heres me thinking tis to widen ur circle your here ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Hide your profile and take a break. Does a world of good." This would be my advice as well. I have regretted deleting profiles before and then coming back. | |||
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" All the nasty stuff is why we don't engage with a lot of the stuff going on here especially the egos and the sycophants they attract. We keep ourselves to ourselves a lot of the time. Honestly better off hiding for a bit. Mute anything to do with fab and take a break. Until it landed at my doorstep I hadn’t actually seen it, now I can’t unsee it. Time to reflect x" Sorry to hear that. | |||
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"I hear ya. I tend to keep my circle of trust very very small here. The fun in fab is nowhere like it use to be. Even the forums have become a less than pleasant place to be. I use to be very active on the forums when it was good fun. Now ppl lie in wait to nitpick at some comments/profiles unnecessary. Over the last 2 yrs I've been mostly hiding. For a place that's not judgemental it is in fact very judgemental. I live in hope that what once was will return. " Totally agree with you. Fab ised to be much better. Like you I keep very much to myself as I cannot be bothered with the drama. | |||
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"Can you explain Fanny blindness? I think fab has grown in the decade I've been here and theres more of everything. I did think that the outright bitching had eased off but maybe not. It's mentally draining at the best of times." It's actually self explanatory. Despicable behaviour glossed over because of who the perpetrators are perceived to be. | |||
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"Can you explain Fanny blindness? I think fab has grown in the decade I've been here and theres more of everything. I did think that the outright bitching had eased off but maybe not. It's mentally draining at the best of times. It's actually self explanatory. Despicable behaviour glossed over because of who the perpetrators are perceived to be. " That’s pretty much it in 1 sentence | |||
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"Can you explain Fanny blindness? I think fab has grown in the decade I've been here and theres more of everything. I did think that the outright bitching had eased off but maybe not. It's mentally draining at the best of times. It's actually self explanatory. Despicable behaviour glossed over because of who the perpetrators are perceived to be. " ![]() | |||
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"Hide your profile and take a break. Does a world of good." I agree.bi hide my profile many times and delete even to take longer break. It is always good to be back with fresh attitude ![]() | |||
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"I've no idea what people are on about when they talk about increased drama, bitching etc. on here, to be honest. It all sounds a bit dramatic. Like everything in life, when you're around something for a long time, where more and more new people come in, feelings can become nostalgic. Nobody is going to convince me that, for example, 5-10yrs ago that there were no creeps on here, no fake accounts, no opiniated people, no bitching on forums etc. Are you being honest with yourselves if you believe that? People just get older, maybe had too much, the buzz might be gone out of it. It's just nostalgia." Is that directed at me? I said there was more of everything ... Not that there was none 10 years ago... In fact Id have said there was less now but I'm not as active so could be missing more | |||
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"I've no idea what people are on about when they talk about increased drama, bitching etc. on here, to be honest. It all sounds a bit dramatic. Like everything in life, when you're around something for a long time, where more and more new people come in, feelings can become nostalgic. Nobody is going to convince me that, for example, 5-10yrs ago that there were no creeps on here, no fake accounts, no opiniated people, no bitching on forums etc. Are you being honest with yourselves if you believe that? People just get older, maybe had too much, the buzz might be gone out of it. It's just nostalgia. Is that directed at me? I said there was more of everything ... Not that there was none 10 years ago... In fact Id have said there was less now but I'm not as active so could be missing more" Sorry, no, it wasn't directed at you. It was just in general. On the forums, the threads tend to be cyclical. Every now and then one like this comes up, usually from experienced people who've been on her for a good few years. We've not really experienced any of what people complain about. The whole talking behind people's backs, etc. Maybe because we're not very active and keep a distance between here and our vanilla life. But when these complaints come in they always sound nostalgic, like it was never this way before. I just doubt that. That's all, nothing personal with anyone btw. | |||
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"I've no idea what people are on about when they talk about increased drama, bitching etc. on here, to be honest. It all sounds a bit dramatic. Like everything in life, when you're around something for a long time, where more and more new people come in, feelings can become nostalgic. Nobody is going to convince me that, for example, 5-10yrs ago that there were no creeps on here, no fake accounts, no opiniated people, no bitching on forums etc. Are you being honest with yourselves if you believe that? People just get older, maybe had too much, the buzz might be gone out of it. It's just nostalgia. Is that directed at me? I said there was more of everything ... Not that there was none 10 years ago... In fact Id have said there was less now but I'm not as active so could be missing more Sorry, no, it wasn't directed at you. It was just in general. On the forums, the threads tend to be cyclical. Every now and then one like this comes up, usually from experienced people who've been on her for a good few years. We've not really experienced any of what people complain about. The whole talking behind people's backs, etc. Maybe because we're not very active and keep a distance between here and our vanilla life. But when these complaints come in they always sound nostalgic, like it was never this way before. I just doubt that. That's all, nothing personal with anyone btw." This post wasn’t about people just talking behind backs - I gave more context - it was about safety. | |||
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"I've no idea what people are on about when they talk about increased drama, bitching etc. on here, to be honest. It all sounds a bit dramatic. Like everything in life, when you're around something for a long time, where more and more new people come in, feelings can become nostalgic. Nobody is going to convince me that, for example, 5-10yrs ago that there were no creeps on here, no fake accounts, no opiniated people, no bitching on forums etc. Are you being honest with yourselves if you believe that? People just get older, maybe had too much, the buzz might be gone out of it. It's just nostalgia. Is that directed at me? I said there was more of everything ... Not that there was none 10 years ago... In fact Id have said there was less now but I'm not as active so could be missing more Sorry, no, it wasn't directed at you. It was just in general. On the forums, the threads tend to be cyclical. Every now and then one like this comes up, usually from experienced people who've been on her for a good few years. We've not really experienced any of what people complain about. The whole talking behind people's backs, etc. Maybe because we're not very active and keep a distance between here and our vanilla life. But when these complaints come in they always sound nostalgic, like it was never this way before. I just doubt that. That's all, nothing personal with anyone btw." I have been here 7 years but only in the forums for four. My best male friend used to be a member here going back many years and was a forum regular. He still has a profile but hasn't logged in for more than 5 years for various reasons. He still talks about the crap that used to go on. Backstabbing and bitching were the words he used. A female friend who was here over 10 years ago also left 4 or 5 years ago because of the shitty behaviour of other women. I have experienced first hand, entitled behaviour at events both as an individual and also when attending as part of a couple. We left one event because of the persistent and unwanted behaviour of the male half of another couple. We were led to believe that this would not be tolerated at future events and yet hardly a month goes by where they are displaying glowing new veries from all the usual suspects. People who really should know better and who are the first to jump on the forums when they are on the receiving end of it all. | |||
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"I hear ya. I tend to keep my circle of trust very very small here. The fun in fab is nowhere like it use to be. Even the forums have become a less than pleasant place to be. I use to be very active on the forums when it was good fun. Now ppl lie in wait to nitpick at some comments/profiles unnecessary. Over the last 2 yrs I've been mostly hiding. For a place that's not judgemental it is in fact very judgemental. I live in hope that what once was will return. " Fuck em .... fuck em all ... call out whatever you need to ... ignore whatever you choose ... life is full of sheep and bandwagons... some others are hearders and coach men ... Then there are the rest ... going their own way .. sticking to their beliefs whilst trying not to impose them onto others . Be yourself and trust that it is who you are ment to be ... If you feel like your personality are your honesty or your approach isn't appreciated within a particular group or venue, Don't go there. Goldberg you are appreciated for you, Not where you are appreciated for fitting in. | |||
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"Can you explain Fanny blindness? I think fab has grown in the decade I've been here and theres more of everything. I did think that the outright bitching had eased off but maybe not. It's mentally draining at the best of times. It's actually self explanatory. Despicable behaviour glossed over because of who the perpetrators are perceived to be. That’s pretty much it in 1 sentence " Those kind of behaviors are glossed over because people want to have their cake and eat it. They want to be able to keep their tongue firmly up certain a**** for their own benefit. So what? Who actually gives a f***. For me it just lets me know the kind of people I don't wish to meet our associate with! The majority of fab have always been the kind of people who run with the hair and the hound. I think that simply stems from the fact that the majority of society is the same. Most people will do whatever benefits them in the moment I'm justified to match their marrows even if it doesn't. Again fuck em ! , Be grateful that fab allows you to see these people for what they are before you have made a mistake of having anything to do with them. In terms of drama if I'm being totally honest forums are probably less dramatic than they used to be. Jesus I've seen some very very nasty groups form on fab over the years. At the moment the worst you have is a bunch of Woke folks who jump on everyone for not tolerating absolutely everything. Which ironically in itself is intolerant ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"I've no idea what people are on about when they talk about increased drama, bitching etc. on here, to be honest. It all sounds a bit dramatic. Like everything in life, when you're around something for a long time, where more and more new people come in, feelings can become nostalgic. Nobody is going to convince me that, for example, 5-10yrs ago that there were no creeps on here, no fake accounts, no opiniated people, no bitching on forums etc. Are you being honest with yourselves if you believe that? People just get older, maybe had too much, the buzz might be gone out of it. It's just nostalgia. Is that directed at me? I said there was more of everything ... Not that there was none 10 years ago... In fact Id have said there was less now but I'm not as active so could be missing more Sorry, no, it wasn't directed at you. It was just in general. On the forums, the threads tend to be cyclical. Every now and then one like this comes up, usually from experienced people who've been on her for a good few years. We've not really experienced any of what people complain about. The whole talking behind people's backs, etc. Maybe because we're not very active and keep a distance between here and our vanilla life. But when these complaints come in they always sound nostalgic, like it was never this way before. I just doubt that. That's all, nothing personal with anyone btw. I have been here 7 years but only in the forums for four. My best male friend used to be a member here going back many years and was a forum regular. He still has a profile but hasn't logged in for more than 5 years for various reasons. He still talks about the crap that used to go on. Backstabbing and bitching were the words he used. A female friend who was here over 10 years ago also left 4 or 5 years ago because of the shitty behaviour of other women. I have experienced first hand, entitled behaviour at events both as an individual and also when attending as part of a couple. We left one event because of the persistent and unwanted behaviour of the male half of another couple. We were led to believe that this would not be tolerated at future events and yet hardly a month goes by where they are displaying glowing new veries from all the usual suspects. People who really should know better and who are the first to jump on the forums when they are on the receiving end of it all. " Ah for folk's sake you're here long enough here now to know that the forums has always been clanish and clickish. Why do the name of Jesus do people get so involved that there are opportunities for other people to back stab them ? The forums have always been like this and certain groups in fab will always be like this. You can have lots of fun and lots of interactions and lots of genuine meets, Without putting yourselves in vulnerable situations | |||
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"Simply put Fab just isnt the same as it was years ago " I’ve been on fab since 2015 and on other sites since 2007 and I honestly don’t think it’s much different. It’s bigger which I suppose can amplify the buzzing noise from the dopes but in all honesty, there’s always been shit stirring, nastiness, gossiping and general shitty behaviour. The difference is that, most people, lose their tolerance for nonsense as they age so things you would’ve just rolled your eyes at years ago, maybe annoy you more now. With fab, it’s important to be clued in to the nonsense and what you need to do to avoid it. Find your people and have fun. If it’s not fun anymore, take a break and hide your profile. If you haven’t been tempted back within 6 months, delete your profile and enjoy the real world and all of its shit ![]() | |||
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"Simply put Fab just isnt the same as it was years ago I’ve been on fab since 2015 and on other sites since 2007 and I honestly don’t think it’s much different. It’s bigger which I suppose can amplify the buzzing noise from the dopes but in all honesty, there’s always been shit stirring, nastiness, gossiping and general shitty behaviour. The difference is that, most people, lose their tolerance for nonsense as they age so things you would’ve just rolled your eyes at years ago, maybe annoy you more now. With fab, it’s important to be clued in to the nonsense and what you need to do to avoid it. Find your people and have fun. If it’s not fun anymore, take a break and hide your profile. If you haven’t been tempted back within 6 months, delete your profile and enjoy the real world and all of its shit ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Simply put Fab just isnt the same as it was years ago I’ve been on fab since 2015 and on other sites since 2007 and I honestly don’t think it’s much different. It’s bigger which I suppose can amplify the buzzing noise from the dopes but in all honesty, there’s always been shit stirring, nastiness, gossiping and general shitty behaviour. The difference is that, most people, lose their tolerance for nonsense as they age so things you would’ve just rolled your eyes at years ago, maybe annoy you more now. With fab, it’s important to be clued in to the nonsense and what you need to do to avoid it. Find your people and have fun. If it’s not fun anymore, take a break and hide your profile. If you haven’t been tempted back within 6 months, delete your profile and enjoy the real world and all of its shit ![]() Yep this is pretty much my take on it as well. | |||
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"Simply put Fab just isnt the same as it was years ago I’ve been on fab since 2015 and on other sites since 2007 and I honestly don’t think it’s much different. It’s bigger which I suppose can amplify the buzzing noise from the dopes but in all honesty, there’s always been shit stirring, nastiness, gossiping and general shitty behaviour. The difference is that, most people, lose their tolerance for nonsense as they age so things you would’ve just rolled your eyes at years ago, maybe annoy you more now. With fab, it’s important to be clued in to the nonsense and what you need to do to avoid it. Find your people and have fun. If it’s not fun anymore, take a break and hide your profile. If you haven’t been tempted back within 6 months, delete your profile and enjoy the real world and all of its shit ![]() This! ![]() | |||
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"There does seem to be a change in mentality particularly since lockdown ended. Fab used to be a lot more social. Chatrooms were busy with people having the craic, now it's full of people not talking hoping to see someone on cam so they can have a wank. A newer wave of people have classed Fab as a sex site and it's a sex now or fuck off attitude. Nobody wants to put effort into a profile, and those that do dont have theirs read properly. A large part of the social/community feel of the site has gone. However, if you can get to the right socials it still exists and renews your faith. So many more people blocked nowadays due to a bad attitude than anything else. OP keep the faith, your small circle will still make being part of Fab worth it." This ![]() | |||
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"Manipulation and disrespect would be called out in any work environment so why tolerate it here. Is the swinging world somehow immune to bullying behaviour, no it isnt. Take a break, reconnect with real friends, and reassess what this life is bringing to you. Thank you for bringing this into the forum. Honesty and open discussions should be welcomed. " Hear hear! If we can't be open and honest with each other why are we getting intimate with one another. Honest and open discussion should be more than tolerated, it should be welcomed. | |||
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