FabSwingers.com forum: Self Care

By *electableicecream OP Man
over a year ago

The West

Everyone has a down day every now and then for myriad reasons. Could be an anniversary, the moon, a hangover or maybe you just couldn't sleep.

For others it might be more than a day. Could be a week or a month or more.

What do you do for self care when the time gets rough?

For me if it's just a day it's the couch, mindless entertainment and my favourite snacks. I've learned not to think about anything that might trigger me or make important decisions if I can avoid it.

There's been times in my life when that time has stretched out. Break ups, loss of one sort or another and even just the unexplainable enui we feel sometimes when a plateau is hit

During these times I've learned to be very gentle with myself.

First rule is no guilt. Self care is whatever it takes and comes before all else

Second is simple achievable discipline. I do this by remembering to take a cheap vitamin tablet each morning and always putting my sunglasses in the same place. After about a week I find I can build on those in gentle steps until I'm either walking, swimming or cycling for in short achievable bursts and tidying the house doesn't feel like forced labour.

Self care is really self love and that can be hard. I need to start small or I scare myself off.

What works for you?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Meditation, and like you said no guilt. We all have down times, some longer than others I think it’s important to have something that helps though like you said. The challenge can be to not let it be more than one day though. Routine is good again like you do with your sunglasses. And talking to someone, someone who will just listen can help. Self care is in my opinion priority and should be a daily habit in some form even just 5 minutes can help.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adger BrocMan
over a year ago

Co. Cork

Be your own best friend.

There is no-one else could be as good at being you as you are.

If things get really bad talk to your doc.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I sometimes get down who doesn't it's part of human nature but I'm not sure how it happens but I always end up in a giddy smiley mood and that's me for the day then can't stop smiling always find humour even in the darkest of moments it's best to find your funny bone

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hivers2020Woman
over a year ago

lolli land

"Be your own best friend.

There is no-one else could be as good at being you as you are.

If things get really bad talk to your doc.

That’s my mantra, be your own best friend first. When the angry voice in your head is spouting shit at you, ask yourself would you say that out loud to someone else? If the answer is no, then don’t speak to yourself that way. Actively start to note negative thoughts and replace them immediately with 3 positive things about yourself, no matter how trivial

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he zephyrCouple
over a year ago

The Sol

"Everyone has a down day every now and then for myriad reasons. Could be an anniversary, the moon, a hangover or maybe you just couldn't sleep.

For others it might be more than a day. Could be a week or a month or more.

What do you do for self care when the time gets rough?

For me if it's just a day it's the couch, mindless entertainment and my favourite snacks. I've learned not to think about anything that might trigger me or make important decisions if I can avoid it.

There's been times in my life when that time has stretched out. Break ups, loss of one sort or another and even just the unexplainable enui we feel sometimes when a plateau is hit

During these times I've learned to be very gentle with myself.

First rule is no guilt. Self care is whatever it takes and comes before all else

Self care is really self love and that can be hard. I need to start small or I scare myself off.

What works for you?

Similar tactics. I used to have to push myself through when the kids were small but now im able to notice the need and take the down time when needed.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ames CoughlanMan
over a year ago

Cahir

Rock music turned up the loudest in the car.....roar to it...don't sing.....it helps get the bad shit put....throat will be sore...but yiu will feel better!!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *egsyWoman
over a year ago

Meath

A bath, sitting by the sea with a coffee, loud music and getting laid all help

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

It use to be for me getting out with the dogs to a beach or somewhere. But now time seems to be tight and I have so much to do that even finding the time to do that is impossible, but it's something I need to start finding the time and energy to do as it's been a stressful time recently and it can feel sometimes like I'm wading through mud just to get through the day.

I'm usually pretty good at handling stress and pressure but maybe it's just getting older it gets tougher.I don't know. But I know things will get better as well so it's not all bad I guess .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rmrs1234Couple
over a year ago

Waterford

Something i have not been doing a lot of lately. Before i used to whack on the headphones and spotify and have a solo disco. Practice my funky chicken dance

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *electableicecream OP Man
over a year ago

The West

I forgot to mention reaching out. I'd never been good at this in the past but I discovered over the last few years that it can make a huge difference.

A simple coffee, a ten minute catch up on the phone or a surprise visit to an old friend can often be the breath of fresh air that's just the ticket to blow a few cobwebs off.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *easingTimMan
over a year ago

Loughlinstown

I keep a Gratitude Diary

Initially I thought it was all a load of self-improvement nonsense and filler

but after doing it for a week I had a much better outlook on life

Now, last thing at night I put on some music and set pen to paper with "Today I am grateful for..." and just list a few simple things that we overlook like clean water, a fridge full of food and a fresh apron to wear each day

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Keep busy pottery in the shed takes your mind off everything else works for me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *affa31Woman
over a year ago

Galway

A trip to my favourite beach to clear the cobwebs, some retail therapy, seeing friends.

Most of all though, I’ve learned to sit with my feelings, acknowledge them, have a chat with myself about why I’m feeling the way I am and remind myself that it’s ok to feel like shite but it will pass.

We’ve survived all of our worst days so far, we can do another

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Music if I'm on my own

Spooning without speaking,just breathing if I'm not alone

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he zephyrCouple
over a year ago

The Sol

"I keep a Gratitude Diary

Initially I thought it was all a load of self-improvement nonsense and filler

but after doing it for a week I had a much better outlook on life

oh yes, i used to do this. its a great habit to be in.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *otownkid1967Man
over a year ago

Portlaoise

I'm lucky in that I'm generally a happy bloke. But if I do feel down, I try and get away for a night or two on my own.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread