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Honesty is the best policy

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By *astello OP   Woman
over a year ago

Far far away

A topic earlier got me thinking.

How do you leave people down.. eg not feeling it

Are you brutal?

Are you soft?

Are you an avoider?

Are you a blocker?

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By *ackandsashaCouple
over a year ago

West Dublin

We're nice as pie. Usually folk read between the lines. Unless its a single male, we always say....As the first line of our profile says....

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By *asual777Man
over a year ago

i travel all over

I don’t reply if not interested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A topic earlier got me thinking.

How do you leave people down.. eg not feeling it

Are you brutal?

Are you soft?

Are you an avoider?

Are you a blocker?

"

That's a great question .. I don't have a bad bone in my body,that's the truth, I'd hate to hurt anyones feelings and do you know what if no response is a good response.. move on .. sorry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don’t reply if not interested "

That's what I was trying to say ..

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By *llthewaysMan
over a year ago

City centre/Naas

Politely unless they have been rude, then I do my best not to respond and apply the block button.

Never feel the need to feed into someone being rude or angry.

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Think its better to be honest...we're all adults

If I met someone for a coffee and at the end there's no spark Id say it...not harshly...no need for that but a quick...nice chatting but not getting a spark so sorry but wont meet again

I think its a lot easier but to be fair I'm useless at picking up signals so prefer to be told

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By *elfastDMan
over a year ago

belfast

How do I let people down?!? That’s a strange concept, I always leave them with a smile on their face, even when they’ve told me I’m not getting near them with my barge pole

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It happens all the time , no spark when people meet , I think a person knows after less than 10 second's if things are gonna go any further..l really do ...their eyes tell it all.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

It depends on the person and their attitude. A recent coffee meet was with a lovely girl, she was fun and chatty and we enjoyed a nice lunch, but there was no sexual spark and I had to say no nicely. Alternatively, the many low-effort no-compatibility messages we get don't deserve a proper response, or may well get a silent block. Depends on the situation and the person.

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

On here I've a simple polite standard answer that doesn't involve any motivation of rejection. I don't want to explain myself but also don't see a point in antagonising someone unnecessarily just because they don't tickle my fancy for whatever reason. Cuts out any abuse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's the best way to be!!!

If they aren't interested, accept it and move on!!

We are adults here, not spoilt kids

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By *eturn of Sir PumpsMan
over a year ago

outside banbridge

Personally I'd just say your not for me

But totally respect the no reply as said before were all adults here you just have to get on with it and respect people's choices

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By *osyRedLipsWoman
over a year ago

Kildare


"It depends on the person and their attitude. A recent coffee meet was with a lovely girl, she was fun and chatty and we enjoyed a nice lunch, but there was no sexual spark and I had to say no nicely. Alternatively, the many low-effort no-compatibility messages we get don't deserve a proper response, or may well get a silent block. Depends on the situation and the person."

I had coffee with guy lovely fella buy just not for me. I told him over coffee I wasn't feeling the attraction. I'll never forget his reply he said this was a sex site there's no need to be attracted to each other. Eh trying telling that to my vagina she's like the Sahara if there's no attraction. On the other hand she's wetter than a otters pocket when there is one..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A topic earlier got me thinking.

How do you leave people down.. eg not feeling it

Are you brutal?

Are you soft?

Are you an avoider?

Are you a blocker?

That's a great question .. I don't have a bad bone in my body,that's the truth, I'd hate to hurt anyones feelings and do you know what if no response is a good response.. move on .. sorry "

Herself is the same so she leaves it to me as I can be a bit too forward (I'm American). I usually just say "Sorry, not interested" or "Maybe some other time".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It depends on the person and their attitude. A recent coffee meet was with a lovely girl, she was fun and chatty and we enjoyed a nice lunch, but there was no sexual spark and I had to say no nicely. Alternatively, the many low-effort no-compatibility messages we get don't deserve a proper response, or may well get a silent block. Depends on the situation and the person.

I had coffee with guy lovely fella buy just not for me. I told him over coffee I wasn't feeling the attraction. I'll never forget his reply he said this was a sex site there's no need to be attracted to each other. Eh trying telling that to my vagina she's like the Sahara if there's no attraction. On the other hand she's wetter than a otters pocket when there is one.."

Did you tell him about your Sahara issue??

He probably had a solution to that too??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honesty is always the best policy. I'm the kinda guy who's always up to meet someone for a social coffee and chat and see how ya get on.... Not everyone is gonna be everyone's cuppa tea but I believe it's better to at least meet in person and then let them know "regardless of any play or that". For me that's just the bonus to it all, but yeah it's much better than making up excuses ect to pull out and leave someone guessing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It depends on the person and their attitude. A recent coffee meet was with a lovely girl, she was fun and chatty and we enjoyed a nice lunch, but there was no sexual spark and I had to say no nicely. Alternatively, the many low-effort no-compatibility messages we get don't deserve a proper response, or may well get a silent block. Depends on the situation and the person.

I had coffee with guy lovely fella buy just not for me. I told him over coffee I wasn't feeling the attraction. I'll never forget his reply he said this was a sex site there's no need to be attracted to each other. Eh trying telling that to my vagina she's like the Sahara if there's no attraction. On the other hand she's wetter than a otters pocket when there is one.."

I must admit that I didn't know otters had pockets or that they got wet.

As far as attraction goes, I'm quickly discovering the two main types of swingers. Those, like yourself, who want attraction and a connection to move forward and those who just want to fuck someone other than their current partner; I think we fall into the later group. However, we still don't just want to fuck any randomer. If the person is dog ugly, sorry, but not interested. Absolutely gorgeous but the size of the Titanic? Sorry, not interested.

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By *adger BrocMan
over a year ago

Co. Cork

Never slam the door shut.

It may be your only means of escape at some stage in the future.

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By *ORBCouple
over a year ago

Dundalk

We get very few messages but normally if there is no attraction we say they aren't what we are looking for.

Most take that ok and say no problem. A few get annoyed.

We got one message recently which was almost copy and paste from the last one they sent 6 months and it was only after replying we realised the response was almost word for word what we had said the last time.

We drew his attention to the first line in our profile that says we aren't currently meeting and that the scenarios he proposed in his message are also mentioned in our bio where it states clearly that we have no interest in any of them.

The response we got was that we were one of those types!

No idea what those types are but hey ho.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not Irish. What seems normal to me, people say it's brutal. I am just being honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not Irish. What seems normal to me, people say it's brutal. I am just being honest."

Where are you two from then?

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By *ornywife20Couple
over a year ago

North Cork

We try to be gentle about it but if that's not working we just " look your really not for us there is no spark so no thanks " . And after that it's block or ignore

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By *adhatter and coCouple
over a year ago

Middle of mayo n peaceful tranquility

This is why we don’t meet unless at socials or parties . Keep moving and avoid those conversations

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick


"It depends on the person and their attitude. A recent coffee meet was with a lovely girl, she was fun and chatty and we enjoyed a nice lunch, but there was no sexual spark and I had to say no nicely. Alternatively, the many low-effort no-compatibility messages we get don't deserve a proper response, or may well get a silent block. Depends on the situation and the person.

I had coffee with guy lovely fella buy just not for me. I told him over coffee I wasn't feeling the attraction. I'll never forget his reply he said this was a sex site there's no need to be attracted to each other. Eh trying telling that to my vagina she's like the Sahara if there's no attraction. On the other hand she's wetter than a otters pocket when there is one.."

Agree on the Sahara and the otters pocket effect which why we rarely do hookups without a prior social, it's just too risky

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I wouldn't block especially if it's someone I have been chatting to. I have told them that I don't think it will be going any farther. Or sometimes the chat just fizzled out over time anyhow. Either way I would prefer to do that than just block.

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By *otchocolate4uMan
over a year ago

Athlone/Galway/Dublin

[Removed by poster at 06/06/23 07:06:42]

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By *otchocolate4uMan
over a year ago

Athlone/Galway/Dublin

Always reply sorry Not interested than block or if the person is rude or keeping visiting profile then block

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If not for me, I say in a nice way. Usually no need to block

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm quickly discovering the two main types of swingers. Those, like yourself, who want attraction and a connection to move forward and those who just want to fuck someone other than their current partner;"

This is a fascinating insight. I'd love to hear more.

Also, hats off for the correct use of a semicolon.

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By *ack RMan
over a year ago

galway

Definitely let people know I’m not interested. I think ghosting and blocking without explanation is really damaging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because most of messages I get is from single males and half of them are blank I just polite write that I am not interested

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By *ealmc1973Man
over a year ago

Limerick, Clare, Tipperary

I get no messages, so it's easy: no interest - no awkward 'no, thank you'

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By *ichael McCarthyMan
over a year ago

Lucan

I always believed that honesty was the best policy.

Ok, I'm off to put sun cream on my 14 inch cock as it's impossible to keep it all hidden on these sunny days.

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