FabSwingers.com forum: Let's Hear it For The Boys ..

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Alot on TV this week about men's mental health yes women suffer aswell, but men are ment to be strong ones, bullshit, men's mental health should be spoken more

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By *adger BrocMan
over a year ago

Co. Cork

Men may, in most cases, be physically stronger than women but when it comes to mental strength we are all equal.

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By *huCullainMan
over a year ago

Rathowen

"Alot on TV this week about men's mental health yes women suffer aswell, but men are ment to be strong ones, bullshit, men's mental health should be spoken more

It's great to see this being mentioned. It's very true that guys tend to suffer in silence. I have to admit I was going through a lot of stuff last year and eventually I had a breakdown. I turned to a therapist and none of my friends or family knew anything.

My point is that both men and women can be going through stuff that none of us realise so try and be there for the people closest to you because you never know what's going on in their lives. Just be sending the odd text or dropping in for a cuppa can make a huge difference to someone.

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By *ickyAthleticMan
over a year ago

Galway

I agree. Lads are the worst for this. Not checkin in with their mates enough.

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By *oserMan
over a year ago

where the wild roses grow

There's a group starting in Tara where guys get together and get "coached"? to help them identify with themselves and other and support each other.

Fair play

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's great to see men's mental health issues highlighted.

However, it's not great to hear men berated for not checking in with their mates or engaged with services.

Traditionally, men have never handled these issues in ways that are usually dealt with by women.

Talking about these topics isn't the problem; it's the manner in which men are expected to engage with methods and tools that they are not used to and possibly feel uncomfortable doing so. Yet, they get the flak for not using methods that women find successful.

Men's mental health is a gendered issue; it should be about engaging men in what they want to do and what they feel comfortable doing.

That's why the men's sheds and activities based engagement work so well. Once we're engrossed in a task, we'll feel much more comfortable talking about what's really going on.

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By *ensualnFunCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

I agree. Most men don’t share feelings as readily as some women do. But I think it’s more a cultural thing than a man thing.

A man need to be strong. Showing weakness/feelings is for sissies. A man never cries. Chin up, chest out and man up….. just a few things they are growing up with.

Men speaking out about their mental health and the options to deal with it out there… are good things in my book.

Problems with mental health is not always a result of life’s knocks. You can have a perfect life and suffer. There are lots of physiological reasons too. And both have solutions out there. Both are equally dangerous and need to be addressed.

You are precious. Take care of yourselves

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By *aucyladMan
over a year ago

Dublin

Great Post OP

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I struggled badly for a whole decade from the age of 40 but didn't recognise that I was struggling.

I was working 7 days a week almost every week and went through a 3 year period where I didn't have 2 consecutive days off.

I used work as a distraction without realising what I was doing.

A couple of personal things happened around the time I turned 50 that allowed me to see what was happening and I made positive changes.

My best male friend is someone I first met through fab.

One of the reasons we have become such good friends is for the first time for either of us we have another man to bounce things off in regard to mental health issues.

He has spent most of his working life setting up community groups and start up companies supporting those with mental health difficulties.

He has direct lines to every charity in NI and beyond and yet when it came to his own difficulties he did the exact opposite of what I had done and left the workforce entirely for 5 years.

No two people are the same and having solutions for others doesn't necessarily mean you will have all the answers even for questions you might ask yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I struggled badly for a whole decade from the age of 40 but didn't recognise that I was struggling.

I was working 7 days a week almost every week and went through a 3 year period where I didn't have 2 consecutive days off.

I used work as a distraction without realising what I was doing.

A couple of personal things happened around the time I turned 50 that allowed me to see what was happening and I made positive changes.

My best male friend is someone I first met through fab.

One of the reasons we have become such good friends is for the first time for either of us we have another man to bounce things off in regard to mental health issues.

He has spent most of his working life setting up community groups and start up companies supporting those with mental health difficulties.

He has direct lines to every charity in NI and beyond and yet when it came to his own difficulties he did the exact opposite of what I had done and left the workforce entirely for 5 years.

No two people are the same and having solutions for others doesn't necessarily mean you will have all the answers even for questions you might ask yourself."

That's fantastic to read. It's ironic; I'm well versed in mental health training and techniques, yet my own will be the last I'll address.

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By *ickyAthleticMan
over a year ago

Galway

"I agree. Most men don’t share feelings as readily as some women do. But I think it’s more a cultural thing than a man thing.

A man need to be strong. Showing weakness/feelings is for sissies. A man never cries. Chin up, chest out and man up….. just a few things they are growing up with.

Men speaking out about their mental health and the options to deal with it out there… are good things in my book.

You are precious. Take care of yourselves

I think it is a man thing tbh. I have had mates who have struggled with different things, and find they need to have come to a breaking point b4 they speak.It is a sign of showing weakness that lads feel i think that stops them from opening up. Plus some dont have a genuine friend to share their shit with too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s up to the men to be more vocal with each other and with GPS and health professionals to seek help. Women are often seen to nag them about their health but it’s only because we care

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By *ornywife20Couple
over a year ago

North Cork

I nearly had a break down a few years ago trying to do to much trying to run a business I was working 14 hours a day 6 or 7 days a week I taught I was invincible but it got too much I nearly lost everything. Counselling should me I had to delegate and take care of myself and my family first. And that there is more to life than money

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