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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Slightly unfair, no? I know that I replied. Unfortunately not everyone can go to every event. I'm already attending one in March and personally can't afford two nights out in one month. I'm sure other people will be in the same position. Trying to make people feel bad because it's for charity isn't cool, nor is calling out other organisers claiming that they're only hosting to make money when that isn't necessarily the case.

I hope you're night turns out a success

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This supposed filling pockets lark really grinds my gears , people organise socials to bring like minded folk together . I’ve never heard of anyone making more than 100 quid from socials and in honesty for the headache of organising etc I wouldn’t begrudge anyone the price of a few drinks ,there’s fuck all money to be made from socials where people bitch about a tenner .

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Absolutely agree but it's for charity

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Was the event advertised publicly?

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By *adhatter and coCouple
over a year ago

Middle of mayo n peaceful tranquility

Stop whinging ,donate money to the charity yourselves and leave the social organising to the people who enjoy planning them

Meanwhile we can get a grip on things we really want to

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

The first mention I can find of this is a week ago and has barely any details. I think you need to sell it a bit. Have a look at how others do it, and try and be nice to people who do it commercially. These things need to at the least pay for themselves and I wouldn't begrudge any organiser getting a few quid for their time on top. When we ran socials in cork we always did it for charity, but there is no need to make a big fuss about it. It needs to be awesome fun first and foremost.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Stop whinging ,donate money to the charity yourselves and leave the social organising to the people who enjoy planning them

"

Inclined to agree, you post doesn't come across well OP.

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I don't get why you think the fact it's for charity would be the main reason people would go. You don't even mention what charity. And there have been mngs in the past organised by others that profits went to charity.

People go to mng to meet others as you know as you have said you have been to them yourself.Most will not be swayed just because it's a charity event unless it is one they support themselves.

Your original post was posted once so easily missed on the forums.It was also pretty short on details like the criteria to get an invite. And personally that's one of the most important things for me before I go to one I'm not going to pm to find out either because most who organise socials have it laid out in the opening of their thread.

Like others have said making digs at others who hold events really is low and considering the amount of work that goes into holding an event I wouldn't begrudge anyone some profit at the end of the night.

I understand it must be disappointing to not get the response you wanted especially when you have organised a venue and date.This thread might awaken interest in it now though.

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Didn't even notice the original post you made about it

Maybe try again....write a new thread....give the information in the opening post instead of hiding it

Complaining about your lack of answers to something so badly advertised is not a good look

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't get why you think the fact it's for charity would be the main reason people would go. You don't even mention what charity. And there have been mngs in the past organised by others that profits went to charity.

People go to mng to meet others as you know as you have said you have been to them yourself.Most will not be swayed just because it's a charity event unless it is one they support themselves.

Your original post was posted once so easily missed on the forums.It was also pretty short on details like the criteria to get an invite. And personally that's one of the most important things for me before I go to one I'm not going to pm to find out either because most who organise socials have it laid out in the opening of their thread.

Like others have said making digs at others who hold events really is low and considering the amount of work that goes into holding an event I wouldn't begrudge anyone some profit at the end of the night.

I understand it must be disappointing to not get the response you wanted especially when you have organised a venue and date.This thread might awaken interest in it now though."

Well said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You need to keep bumping the thread up to the top to get attention otherwise people will forget

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fab is the home of disappointment.

I thought that was in the rules, no?

People are people.

They just can't help it apparently

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The forum threads move quite quickly here so if it's not being replied to or you're not bumping the thread it's going to very quickly get lost. Also your thread said Adult Social most organisers when they start a thread have name of Social and date ie Destiny awaits Social 25th March. People might have seen it and not clicked on it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

£100 lol,they make £1000s,do the maths it's not that hard.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yes it was and invites sent. They can't even be bothered to read.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

One invite was sent to a couple that we've met at a few socials before and they haven't even had the manners to read it. So frustrating especially when you know they go to every social going. Manners cost nothing.

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By *ananaman41Man
over a year ago

Dublin


"One invite was sent to a couple that we've met at a few socials before and they haven't even had the manners to read it. So frustrating especially when you know they go to every social going. Manners cost nothing. "

Well you know what they say, no reply no interest, isnt it

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"£100 lol,they make £1000s,do the maths it's not that hard."

60 or 70 people at a social at £10 or £15 a head minus costs doesn't leave a lot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is this your first time organising a social?

I noticed more and more places and ppl organise socials and play events, so competing with these isnt easy. And if your even is in march then you are making it even harder as outside fab there are also many social events on that month. Hotels are super expensive then as well. They all put a lot of time and effort getting them of the ground. Did not just happen over night.

Maybe start small and work your way up. Your profile is also hidden to me that would be a red flag if I wanted to attend an event.

We have said no to big events before cause of timing. Life does get in the way of fun a lot as we all know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One invite was sent to a couple that we've met at a few socials before and they haven't even had the manners to read it. So frustrating especially when you know they go to every social going. Manners cost nothing. "

Jesus wept

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One invite was sent to a couple that we've met at a few socials before and they haven't even had the manners to read it. So frustrating especially when you know they go to every social going. Manners cost nothing. "

Calling people "up their own arses" on your other thread doesn't seem particularly mannerly either. I get that you're frustrated and disappointed, lashing out blindly at people isn't going to have anyone rushing to your proposed event

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One invite was sent to a couple that we've met at a few socials before and they haven't even had the manners to read it. So frustrating especially when you know they go to every social going. Manners cost nothing.

Calling people "up their own arses" on your other thread doesn't seem particularly mannerly either. I get that you're frustrated and disappointed, lashing out blindly at people isn't going to have anyone rushing to your proposed event"

Or any future events

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By *rmrs1234Couple
over a year ago

Waterford


"One invite was sent to a couple that we've met at a few socials before and they haven't even had the manners to read it. So frustrating especially when you know they go to every social going. Manners cost nothing.

Calling people "up their own arses" on your other thread doesn't seem particularly mannerly either. I get that you're frustrated and disappointed, lashing out blindly at people isn't going to have anyone rushing to your proposed event"

Or any future interactions at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One invite was sent to a couple that we've met at a few socials before and they haven't even had the manners to read it. So frustrating especially when you know they go to every social going. Manners cost nothing.

Calling people "up their own arses" on your other thread doesn't seem particularly mannerly either. I get that you're frustrated and disappointed, lashing out blindly at people isn't going to have anyone rushing to your proposed event

Or any future interactions at all. "

All I see are butt cheeks

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Is this your first time organising a social?

I noticed more and more places and ppl organise socials and play events, so competing with these isnt easy. And if your even is in march then you are making it even harder as outside fab there are also many social events on that month. Hotels are super expensive then as well. They all put a lot of time and effort getting them of the ground. Did not just happen over night.

Maybe start small and work your way up. Your profile is also hidden to me that would be a red flag if I wanted to attend an event.

We have said no to big events before cause of timing. Life does get in the way of fun a lot as we all know "

We've been having socials over 3 years now in our own home and they've been very successful so decided to go bigger and find a venue, wish we hadn't bothered now. Lesson learnt.

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By *Belfast_FellaMan
over a year ago

belfast

Don’t mind me, just here for the replies

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By *rmrs1234Couple
over a year ago

Waterford


"Don’t mind me, just here for the replies "

I read that way too fast and i thought u were lookin for recipes

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By *r_Insatiable666Man
over a year ago

Cork


"Don’t mind me, just here for the replies

I read that way too fast and i thought u were lookin for recipes "

I've got an excellent pancake recipe, really easy to make

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By *huCullainMan
over a year ago

Rathowen


"Don’t mind me, just here for the replies

I read that way too fast and i thought u were lookin for recipes

I've got an excellent pancake recipe, really easy to make "

Pancakes!!! This thread just got interesting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is this your first time organising a social?

I noticed more and more places and ppl organise socials and play events, so competing with these isnt easy. And if your even is in march then you are making it even harder as outside fab there are also many social events on that month. Hotels are super expensive then as well. They all put a lot of time and effort getting them of the ground. Did not just happen over night.

Maybe start small and work your way up. Your profile is also hidden to me that would be a red flag if I wanted to attend an event.

We have said no to big events before cause of timing. Life does get in the way of fun a lot as we all know

We've been having socials over 3 years now in our own home and they've been very successful so decided to go bigger and find a venue, wish we hadn't bothered now. Lesson learnt. "

The other lad up north, that swallowed a thesaurus, will be able to explain where ye went wrong

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By *usty is backWoman
over a year ago

newtownabby

[Removed by poster at 04/02/23 16:30:52]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is this your first time organising a social?

I noticed more and more places and ppl organise socials and play events, so competing with these isnt easy. And if your even is in march then you are making it even harder as outside fab there are also many social events on that month. Hotels are super expensive then as well. They all put a lot of time and effort getting them of the ground. Did not just happen over night.

Maybe start small and work your way up. Your profile is also hidden to me that would be a red flag if I wanted to attend an event.

We have said no to big events before cause of timing. Life does get in the way of fun a lot as we all know

We've been having socials over 3 years now in our own home and they've been very successful so decided to go bigger and find a venue, wish we hadn't bothered now. Lesson learnt.

The other lad up north, that swallowed a thesaurus, will be able to explain where ye went wrong"

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By *usty is backWoman
over a year ago

newtownabby


"£100 lol,they make £1000s,do the maths it's not that hard."

I run events and always donate profit to charities after costs are covered I also ran a camping event which I personally was out £200 out of my own pocket I find your comments offensive maybe you need a maths lesson or not judge everyone with same brush

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"we've been having socials over 3 years now in our own home and they've been very successful so decided to go bigger and find a venue, wish we hadn't bothered now. Lesson learnt. "

So these socials you've been organising in your home successfully.... how come NONE of these fabbers wanted to go to this social? At some point you have to stop blaming the attendees and figure out what went wrong yourself. It's not always everyone else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"£100 lol,they make £1000s,do the maths it's not that hard.

I run events and always donate profit to charities after costs are covered I also ran a camping event which I personally was out £200 out of my own pocket I find your comments offensive maybe you need a maths lesson or not judge everyone with same brush

"

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By *he JiggliesCouple
over a year ago

Athlone

To be honest your attitude on this thread and on the original one would totally put us off ever attending a social you were hosting. Plus the comment about all organisers making a profit is a load of crap when you take into account the costs of running such an event most would be lucky if they had enough left over to cover a few drinks for themselves.

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By *adger BrocMan
over a year ago

Co. Cork

Maybe an event with a PINK gin and craft BEER theme would work better for you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"we've been having socials over 3 years now in our own home and they've been very successful so decided to go bigger and find a venue, wish we hadn't bothered now. Lesson learnt.

So these socials you've been organising in your home successfully.... how come NONE of these fabbers wanted to go to this social? At some point you have to stop blaming the attendees and figure out what went wrong yourself. It's not always everyone else."

Well of course some were coming and others move on or leave fab. Oh we've figured out what's going wrong, everyone is stuck up their own arse and everyone else's wee click. Be the last social we'll be organising or attending.

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"we've been having socials over 3 years now in our own home and they've been very successful so decided to go bigger and find a venue, wish we hadn't bothered now. Lesson learnt.

So these socials you've been organising in your home successfully.... how come NONE of these fabbers wanted to go to this social? At some point you have to stop blaming the attendees and figure out what went wrong yourself. It's not always everyone else.

Well of course some were coming and others move on or leave fab. Oh we've figured out what's going wrong, everyone is stuck up their own arse and everyone else's wee click. Be the last social we'll be organising or attending. "

So not all bad news then

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By *oserMan
over a year ago

where the wild roses grow


"we've been having socials over 3 years now in our own home and they've been very successful so decided to go bigger and find a venue, wish we hadn't bothered now. Lesson learnt.

So these socials you've been organising in your home successfully.... how come NONE of these fabbers wanted to go to this social? At some point you have to stop blaming the attendees and figure out what went wrong yourself. It's not always everyone else.

Well of course some were coming and others move on or leave fab. Oh we've figured out what's going wrong, everyone is stuck up their own arse and everyone else's wee click. Be the last social we'll be organising or attending.

So not all bad news then "

For who?

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By *adhatter and coCouple
over a year ago

Middle of mayo n peaceful tranquility


"we've been having socials over 3 years now in our own home and they've been very successful so decided to go bigger and find a venue, wish we hadn't bothered now. Lesson learnt.

So these socials you've been organising in your home successfully.... how come NONE of these fabbers wanted to go to this social? At some point you have to stop blaming the attendees and figure out what went wrong yourself. It's not always everyone else.

Well of course some were coming and others move on or leave fab. Oh we've figured out what's going wrong, everyone is stuck up their own arse and everyone else's wee click. Be the last social we'll be organising or attending.

So not all bad news then

For who? "

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"£100 lol,they make £1000s,do the maths it's not that hard.

I run events and always donate profit to charities after costs are covered I also ran a camping event which I personally was out £200 out of my own pocket I find your comments offensive maybe you need a maths lesson or not judge everyone with same brush.

This above , the only people who think big bucks are being made by organisers …are usually those who have never actually organised any . Everyone knows that this little hobby swinging is gonna cost ya money , like most hobbies .most folks organise get togethers knowing they are likely gonna be out of pocket themselves but it balances up with new contacts made and good times had .There are a sizeable amount of people who expect get togethers to be totally free as if the contribution of a few quid for the hire of the room or nibbles etc somehow equates to funding prostitution ! Don’t make me laugh

"

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By *lassy lady 216Woman
over a year ago

Craigavon

I run parties with 2very good friends the first few we did we actually never charged a penny and bore the expense ourselves they we had people coming and asking why we're we not charging we only ever cover the cost of hiring a venue the idea of our parties isn't to make money it's to bring like minded people together and to see people enjoy themselves so your comments are actually very offensive and you will probably find that's why you haven't had the response that you wanted you obviously have no idea of the amount of work and stress that go into organising events

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/02/23 22:52:23]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"we've been having socials over 3 years now in our own home and they've been very successful so decided to go bigger and find a venue, wish we hadn't bothered now. Lesson learnt.

So these socials you've been organising in your home successfully.... how come NONE of these fabbers wanted to go to this social? At some point you have to stop blaming the attendees and figure out what went wrong yourself. It's not always everyone else.

Well of course some were coming and others move on or leave fab. Oh we've figured out what's going wrong, everyone is stuck up their own arse and everyone else's wee click. Be the last social we'll be organising or attending.

So not all bad news then "

Lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I run parties with 2very good friends the first few we did we actually never charged a penny and bore the expense ourselves they we had people coming and asking why we're we not charging we only ever cover the cost of hiring a venue the idea of our parties isn't to make money it's to bring like minded people together and to see people enjoy themselves so your comments are actually very offensive and you will probably find that's why you haven't had the response that you wanted you obviously have no idea of the amount of work and stress that go into organising events "

Yeah if you actually read the original post,it was for charity not us,oh and thanks for the reply back too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I run parties with 2very good friends the first few we did we actually never charged a penny and bore the expense ourselves they we had people coming and asking why we're we not charging we only ever cover the cost of hiring a venue the idea of our parties isn't to make money it's to bring like minded people together and to see people enjoy themselves so your comments are actually very offensive and you will probably find that's why you haven't had the response that you wanted you obviously have no idea of the amount of work and stress that go into organising events "

Don't chat to us about stress and hard work as a couple who's been doing this over 3 years,we know how to hold a social, so jog on.

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By *urFabFun21Couple
over a year ago

Somewhere

Jaysus. That escalated quickly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It sucks your social didn't go ahead OP, but I don't think this is the correct way to address the situation.

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By *elfastDMan
over a year ago

belfast

Let me know when your next social is, they sound like they’d be great craic!

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"I run parties with 2very good friends the first few we did we actually never charged a penny and bore the expense ourselves they we had people coming and asking why we're we not charging we only ever cover the cost of hiring a venue the idea of our parties isn't to make money it's to bring like minded people together and to see people enjoy themselves so your comments are actually very offensive and you will probably find that's why you haven't had the response that you wanted you obviously have no idea of the amount of work and stress that go into organising events

Don't chat to us about stress and hard work as a couple who's been doing this over 3 years,we know how to hold a social, so jog on."

So all you need to learn now is how to advertise one

You had the same thread a year ago....no one answered that either

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By *3nsesMan
over a year ago

Dublin

Take the hint OP. No one wants to spend time with yous, and from your attitudes in this thread it shouldn't come as a surprise.

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By *dfabMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne

(Liverpool accent) calm down! Calm down everybody!

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"I run parties with 2very good friends the first few we did we actually never charged a penny and bore the expense ourselves they we had people coming and asking why we're we not charging we only ever cover the cost of hiring a venue the idea of our parties isn't to make money it's to bring like minded people together and to see people enjoy themselves so your comments are actually very offensive and you will probably find that's why you haven't had the response that you wanted you obviously have no idea of the amount of work and stress that go into organising events

Don't chat to us about stress and hard work as a couple who's been doing this over 3 years,we know how to hold a social, so jog on."

You know how to hold a social and yet you fucked up holding a social?

...oh wait no it was everyone else's fault.

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By *tevecabra7Man
over a year ago

cabra


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks"
if I had of know about ya social I wud went along and gave double or triple the fee for charity. But who eversays was for filling our own pockets. WANKERS don't mind them. Ya try do a bit of good and some jealous hungry fucks think differently. SAD FUKS

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By *ORBCouple
over a year ago

Dundalk


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks if I had of know about ya social I wud went along and gave double or triple the fee for charity. But who eversays was for filling our own pockets. WANKERS don't mind them. Ya try do a bit of good and some jealous hungry fucks think differently. SAD FUKS "

The op is the one claiming that others are filling their pockets. Not the other way around.

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By *exydoctorsCouple
over a year ago

Galway/Clare

I would have thought the norm for arranging anything from a country walk to an exercise class to a night out (whether fab or not, for charity or not) was to throw out a date and location and see if you get the interest. There are always going to be people that say yes, people that say no and people who don't even read the email.

If you don't get enough interest, you change things around until you do...not give out about the people who haven't said yes. That's always the way for organisers

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Big decisions here.

Do you build the bridge and get over it before you burn it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suspect that the OP would have said their bit, felt annoyed (rightly or wrongly) for a hot second and got over it just as quickly.... if it weren't for the fabulous pile on that everyone leapt to join in on. But it's too delicious to resist a forum dressing down for many.

But maybe I'm wrong.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"I suspect that the OP would have said their bit, felt annoyed (rightly or wrongly) for a hot second and got over it just as quickly.... if it weren't for the fabulous pile on that everyone leapt to join in on. But it's too delicious to resist a forum dressing down for many.

But maybe I'm wrong.

"

Accusing other organisers of doing something wrong, and also saying fabbers who dare to not attend the event need to "get a grip", and complaining that people didn't all reply immediately to invitations, and then coming here with a stinking attitude to lash out at everyone.... its a well deserved response.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Orrrr, ya'know.... ignore the thread like everyone did their previous one.

Clearly it's a possibility

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By *ananaman41Man
over a year ago

Dublin


"Orrrr, ya'know.... ignore the thread like everyone did their previous one.

Clearly it's a possibility "

Well the fact they posted a thread meant they were looking for responses, did it not?

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork


"Orrrr, ya'know.... ignore the thread like everyone did their previous one.

Clearly it's a possibility "

I don't see anything wrong in replying with fairness when unreasonably attacked. Nobody here in this thread behaved as badly as OP as far as I can see.

I didn't see a previous thread

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By *ontbesillywrapyourwillyMan
over a year ago

Tipperary

Organised events in your own home, big attendees, tried a bigger venue, it went tits up. Joking aside , I can understand the frustration if u have gone to alot of effort. Did people say they’d go, u sent them email and they didn’t bother turning up?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Orrrr, ya'know.... ignore the thread like everyone did their previous one.

Clearly it's a possibility

Well the fact they posted a thread meant they were looking for responses, did it not? "

Sometimes people want to be made to feel better not worse.

They came out all guns blazing but I can see the hurt below.

Don't think it's that difficult to give a person feedback and support without shredding them and turning up the gas.

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By *mmmm300Woman
over a year ago

cork

I think the Op went overboard for sure with accusations and wording, but the onslaught that followed from some led to think of another current thread about Fab and how it affects peoples mental health. Words can do damage, on both sides here.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

"everyone is stuck up their own arse"

...and it's the replies refuting it that you're complaining at

When you lash out at everyone around you, blaming them for a failure, then you have to expect a response.

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By *ananaman41Man
over a year ago

Dublin


"Orrrr, ya'know.... ignore the thread like everyone did their previous one.

Clearly it's a possibility

Well the fact they posted a thread meant they were looking for responses, did it not?

Sometimes people want to be made to feel better not worse.

They came out all guns blazing but I can see the hurt below.

Don't think it's that difficult to give a person feedback and support without shredding them and turning up the gas."

So what would you suggest people have done then?

Soothed them with a lullaby, said 'there there' and given them a kiss on the forehead?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *mmmm300Woman
over a year ago

cork


""everyone is stuck up their own arse"

...and it's the replies refuting it that you're complaining at

When you lash out at everyone around you, blaming them for a failure, then you have to expect a response."

Just because you have to expect it, does not mean you have to get it. To me it's just coming in at their level, which I do agree was ridiculous by the way. We all must take responsibility for ourselves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you look at the fab events list for 2023 there us something literally every weekend, and going to socials is an expensive weekend.

For me if I go to a social I have cost of diesel, hotel cost ( single person) , drinking money, food etc take into consideration than life outside fab, birthdays and anniversaries, bills bills a d more bills, I can't attend all the socials I like.

On average a hotel costs me €150 for a night.

I got an invite for the social it doesn't suit me to go, I've often got ones for other socials and I couldn't go, I didn't reply as way I see it no reply is a reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Orrrr, ya'know.... ignore the thread like everyone did their previous one.

Clearly it's a possibility

Well the fact they posted a thread meant they were looking for responses, did it not?

Sometimes people want to be made to feel better not worse.

They came out all guns blazing but I can see the hurt below.

Don't think it's that difficult to give a person feedback and support without shredding them and turning up the gas.

So what would you suggest people have done then?

Soothed them with a lullaby, said 'there there' and given them a kiss on the forehead? "

No need to be facetious.

I've already said alternatives. And some posters were actually constructive without the biting comments.

Just isn't as appealing or do'able for some perhaps.

Which is their choice.

But then after the ire gets purposely stoked and the thread escalates comments start flowing in about "hey, mate why so salty, calm down"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

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By *ananaman41Man
over a year ago

Dublin


"Orrrr, ya'know.... ignore the thread like everyone did their previous one.

Clearly it's a possibility

Well the fact they posted a thread meant they were looking for responses, did it not?

Sometimes people want to be made to feel better not worse.

They came out all guns blazing but I can see the hurt below.

Don't think it's that difficult to give a person feedback and support without shredding them and turning up the gas.

So what would you suggest people have done then?

Soothed them with a lullaby, said 'there there' and given them a kiss on the forehead?

No need to be facetious.

I've already said alternatives. And some posters were actually constructive without the biting comments.

Just isn't as appealing or do'able for some perhaps.

Which is their choice.

But then after the ire gets purposely stoked and the thread escalates comments start flowing in about "hey, mate why so salty, calm down"

"

I dont know what that last bit means.

This is really very simple. The OP went all out slinging people under the bus, and they got it back in spades, as would be expected.

Nothing deeper to it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh I know, no rules broken. OP did come out all guns blazing.

Just not what people preach on here though. Like was mentioned above about the MH thread.

It's not doing anyone any good.

Like I said, bypassing the thread is always an option.

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By *3nsesMan
over a year ago

Dublin


"Oh I know, no rules broken. OP did come out all guns blazing.

Just not what people preach on here though. Like was mentioned above about the MH thread.

It's not doing anyone any good.

Like I said, bypassing the thread is always an option."

But bypassing the OPs original post is what got us here in the first place. It would just be cruel to ignore the OP again. They wanted replies ans they have now gotten plenty.

Also, I've enjoyed this thread ans it has given me a good laugh so it's done me some good.

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By *amsevenMan
over a year ago

cork

Waking up on a bank holiday Sunday morning and reading this. Ugh. I know people and pissed off. Mental health me arse. Everyone go stand in the corner

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By *ananaman41Man
over a year ago

Dublin


"Oh I know, no rules broken. OP did come out all guns blazing.

Just not what people preach on here though. Like was mentioned above about the MH thread.

It's not doing anyone any good.

Like I said, bypassing the thread is always an option."

Sorry but throwing MH into things like this so casually is doing anyone with genuine MH difficulties no service at all.

There will always be conflict and disagreement and arguments amongst human beings. Accountability is important, without it there are no consequences. That applies from the top of governments down to the lowliest posting on a fuck site forum.

Asking people to just 'ignore' something is giving someone a free pass for something they do not deserve and is blatantly the wrong thing to do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In your opinion.

Mine differs.

And that's okay.

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By *avid4olderMan
over a year ago

North Coast

[Removed by poster at 05/02/23 10:49:54]

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By *ouple 0073Couple
over a year ago

donegal

So what if some ppl make money...is that a bad thing!

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By *ixie and dixie2022Couple
over a year ago

villiage

How to get noticed and make friends

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"One invite was sent to a couple that we've met at a few socials before and they haven't even had the manners to read it. So frustrating especially when you know they go to every social going. Manners cost nothing.

Calling people "up their own arses" on your other thread doesn't seem particularly mannerly either. I get that you're frustrated and disappointed, lashing out blindly at people isn't going to have anyone rushing to your proposed event

Or any future interactions at all. "

Careful guys ... those bandwagon get full very easily

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Place is nuts

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"I suspect that the OP would have said their bit, felt annoyed (rightly or wrongly) for a hot second and got over it just as quickly.... if it weren't for the fabulous pile on that everyone leapt to join in on. But it's too delicious to resist a forum dressing down for many.

But maybe I'm wrong.

"

this

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"I suspect that the OP would have said their bit, felt annoyed (rightly or wrongly) for a hot second and got over it just as quickly.... if it weren't for the fabulous pile on that everyone leapt to join in on. But it's too delicious to resist a forum dressing down for many.

But maybe I'm wrong.

Accusing other organisers of doing something wrong, and also saying fabbers who dare to not attend the event need to "get a grip", and complaining that people didn't all reply immediately to invitations, and then coming here with a stinking attitude to lash out at everyone.... its a well deserved response."

Wouldn't agree ... your basically saying and eye for an eye ... blind world so .

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"Orrrr, ya'know.... ignore the thread like everyone did their previous one.

Clearly it's a possibility

Well the fact they posted a thread meant they were looking for responses, did it not? "

Noone forced you to give a nasty one .. or even one at all

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


""everyone is stuck up their own arse"

...and it's the replies refuting it that you're complaining at

When you lash out at everyone around you, blaming them for a failure, then you have to expect a response."

Its the same thing ... I could do like you .I could lash out at you for feeling angry at the way the OP post their frustration. Or I could say, I get it to some extent your just lashing out cause you feel offended. Which response do you prefer?

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

"

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"Orrrr, ya'know.... ignore the thread like everyone did their previous one.

Clearly it's a possibility

Well the fact they posted a thread meant they were looking for responses, did it not?

Sometimes people want to be made to feel better not worse.

They came out all guns blazing but I can see the hurt below.

Don't think it's that difficult to give a person feedback and support without shredding them and turning up the gas.

So what would you suggest people have done then?

Soothed them with a lullaby, said 'there there' and given them a kiss on the forehead?

No need to be facetious.

I've already said alternatives. And some posters were actually constructive without the biting comments.

Just isn't as appealing or do'able for some perhaps.

Which is their choice.

But then after the ire gets purposely stoked and the thread escalates comments start flowing in about "hey, mate why so salty, calm down"

I dont know what that last bit means.

This is really very simple. The OP went all out slinging people under the bus, and they got it back in spades, as would be expected.

Nothing deeper to it"

It's only expected if that's how you were raised or if that's become your learned behavior. I think that's the point that some posts are trying to make. We don't have to respond like for like and more often than not it isn't helpful.

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By *antas_number_one_elfWoman
over a year ago

dublin


"£100 lol,they make £1000s,do the maths it's not that hard."

You are coming across quite poorly and would not entice me to attend any sort of social you were organizing as you are not portraying yourself in a good light at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?"

The OP said he had "not as much as a reply back" and then went on to say it was because people were up their own holes. Am I wrong?

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of


"I suspect that the OP would have said their bit, felt annoyed (rightly or wrongly) for a hot second and got over it just as quickly.... if it weren't for the fabulous pile on that everyone leapt to join in on. But it's too delicious to resist a forum dressing down for many.

But maybe I'm wrong.

this "

You could argue that this post is doing the exact same what it is criticising, just in the opposite direction. So is my own one now.

It's a forum, if you post you get reactions.

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?

The OP said he had "not as much as a reply back" and then went on to say it was because people were up their own holes. Am I wrong? "

Was it addressed to you ? Or did you just feel giving your blow would help the situation?

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"I suspect that the OP would have said their bit, felt annoyed (rightly or wrongly) for a hot second and got over it just as quickly.... if it weren't for the fabulous pile on that everyone leapt to join in on. But it's too delicious to resist a forum dressing down for many.

But maybe I'm wrong.

this

You could argue that this post is doing the exact same what it is criticising, just in the opposite direction. So is my own one now.

It's a forum, if you post you get reactions. "

You do get reactions... I think there is a difference between reactions and flocks piling on ...imo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?

The OP said he had "not as much as a reply back" and then went on to say it was because people were up their own holes. Am I wrong?

Was it addressed to you ? Or did you just feel giving your blow would help the situation? "

As one of those who apparently didn't reply and who wasn't going because Im stuck up my own hole, favour a click (sic) and am uncharitable then yes it was. Stating that I had replied and given my reason is hardly a blow. If someone posts an untruth should it go unchallenged?

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By *ittlekinks38Woman
over a year ago

outside belfast x

Well all I can say is not everyone has the time or money to attend every single social its very expensive for many...and calling many people out for not reading or replying is maybe due to status updates or attacking a group full of decent people with all the accusations and an email that basically said...you're invited to a social and here's the ticket link doesn't cut it! It's very poor effort if you ask me .....I've been to many socials over the years I've been on here and I'd say am well known and am extremely friendly and out going and I've also arranged a few small social gatherings myself which takes hard work and dedication and effort...

It's definitely easier to attend the bigger socials than try and arrange smaller ones but hey ho I ain't throwing my toys outta the pram when no one wants to attend!

Just gotta ask yourself why that might be?

You've complained so many times that might have something to do about it!

Over and out from me...

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By *adforsexMan
over a year ago

Santry


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks"
yeah a lot charge money to attend instantly puts me off lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks yeah a lot charge money to attend instantly puts me off lol "

Eh?

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By *eadue stallionMan
over a year ago

Yes


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks"

No reply = Not interested

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By *ittlekinks38Woman
over a year ago

outside belfast x


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks yeah a lot charge money to attend instantly puts me off lol "

The small amount asked pays for the venue to be rented out to the organisers and pay for dj and maybe cover some food or nibbles shouldn't let it put you off...all socials are good craic you should come along and see for yourself

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By *adforsexMan
over a year ago

Santry


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks yeah a lot charge money to attend instantly puts me off lol

The small amount asked pays for the venue to be rented out to the organisers and pay for dj and maybe cover some food or nibbles shouldn't let it put you off...all socials are good craic you should come along and see for yourself "

true that

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of


"I suspect that the OP would have said their bit, felt annoyed (rightly or wrongly) for a hot second and got over it just as quickly.... if it weren't for the fabulous pile on that everyone leapt to join in on. But it's too delicious to resist a forum dressing down for many.

But maybe I'm wrong.

this

You could argue that this post is doing the exact same what it is criticising, just in the opposite direction. So is my own one now.

It's a forum, if you post you get reactions.

You do get reactions... I think there is a difference between reactions and flocks piling on ...imo"

I wouldn't rate this thread as the usual forum bashing you sometimes see here. The thread is quite a mixed bag of advice, understanding, critisism (some very valid points being made) up to offence taking. Yes a few answers may be in the same tone the op is using in some posts and if you choose to do so you lower yourself on the same level and don't do yourself a favour.

The post your agreeing to is phrased as a dig in itself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I suspect that the OP would have said their bit, felt annoyed (rightly or wrongly) for a hot second and got over it just as quickly.... if it weren't for the fabulous pile on that everyone leapt to join in on. But it's too delicious to resist a forum dressing down for many.

But maybe I'm wrong.

this

You could argue that this post is doing the exact same what it is criticising, just in the opposite direction. So is my own one now.

It's a forum, if you post you get reactions.

You do get reactions... I think there is a difference between reactions and flocks piling on ...imo

I wouldn't rate this thread as the usual forum bashing you sometimes see here. The thread is quite a mixed bag of advice, understanding, critisism (some very valid points being made) up to offence taking. Yes a few answers may be in the same tone the op is using in some posts and if you choose to do so you lower yourself on the same level and don't do yourself a favour.

The post your agreeing to is phrased as a dig in itself.

"

Can't wait for their next "event" all the same

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks yeah a lot charge money to attend instantly puts me off lol "

I'm organising a social, tickets are 10 euro, which will cover nibbles, some spot prizes and a dj. I won't be making anything from it. I have to cover my travel and my accommodation myself.

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?

The OP said he had "not as much as a reply back" and then went on to say it was because people were up their own holes. Am I wrong?

Was it addressed to you ? Or did you just feel giving your blow would help the situation?

As one of those who apparently didn't reply and who wasn't going because Im stuck up my own hole, favour a click (sic) and am uncharitable then yes it was. Stating that I had replied and given my reason is hardly a blow. If someone posts an untruth should it go unchallenged?"

Tour negative reply followed with a thumbs up ... not hard to see through ...imo

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"I suspect that the OP would have said their bit, felt annoyed (rightly or wrongly) for a hot second and got over it just as quickly.... if it weren't for the fabulous pile on that everyone leapt to join in on. But it's too delicious to resist a forum dressing down for many.

But maybe I'm wrong.

this

You could argue that this post is doing the exact same what it is criticising, just in the opposite direction. So is my own one now.

It's a forum, if you post you get reactions.

You do get reactions... I think there is a difference between reactions and flocks piling on ...imo

I wouldn't rate this thread as the usual forum bashing you sometimes see here. The thread is quite a mixed bag of advice, understanding, critisism (some very valid points being made) up to offence taking. Yes a few answers may be in the same tone the op is using in some posts and if you choose to do so you lower yourself on the same level and don't do yourself a favour.

The post your agreeing to is phrased as a dig in itself.

"

Yes it is a digish post ... Not being as much of an onslaught as some posts can be from bandwagons doesn't really say much . Let's b******* it's still b*******

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?

The OP said he had "not as much as a reply back" and then went on to say it was because people were up their own holes. Am I wrong?

Was it addressed to you ? Or did you just feel giving your blow would help the situation?

As one of those who apparently didn't reply and who wasn't going because Im stuck up my own hole, favour a click (sic) and am uncharitable then yes it was. Stating that I had replied and given my reason is hardly a blow. If someone posts an untruth should it go unchallenged?

Tour negative reply followed with a thumbs up ... not hard to see through ...imo "

Well my apologies for not responding in a positive fashion. I'll try to be a better person in future

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By *ustkrissMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks"

Wow!! A couple of them up their own arse fabbers who run socials and charge money is because they run it as a business Also if a person charges to help cover the costs and it's so wrong why are these events mostly sold out.

I instantly said I wasn't going to your event because of a few things, none of them reasons I need to share with you. Now that you have shown how you really deal with things not going your way makes realise we made the right choice

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?

The OP said he had "not as much as a reply back" and then went on to say it was because people were up their own holes. Am I wrong?

Was it addressed to you ? Or did you just feel giving your blow would help the situation?

As one of those who apparently didn't reply and who wasn't going because Im stuck up my own hole, favour a click (sic) and am uncharitable then yes it was. Stating that I had replied and given my reason is hardly a blow. If someone posts an untruth should it go unchallenged?

Tour negative reply followed with a thumbs up ... not hard to see through ...imo

Well my apologies for not responding in a positive fashion. I'll try to be a better person in future "

I doubt it imo.... at the same time its not a matter of being more positive rather genuine !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Yes it is a digish post ... Not being as much of an onslaught as some posts can be from bandwagons doesn't really say much . Let's b******* it's still b*******"

Lol

You went from 'this ' to the above pretty quick.

I'm impressed

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks

Wow!! A couple of them up their own arse fabbers who run socials and charge money is because they run it as a business Also if a person charges to help cover the costs and it's so wrong why are these events mostly sold out.

I instantly said I wasn't going to your event because of a few things, none of them reasons I need to share with you. Now that you have shown how you really deal with things not going your way makes realise we made the right choice "

Hit men are mostly busy ... dosnt equate to being right

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?

The OP said he had "not as much as a reply back" and then went on to say it was because people were up their own holes. Am I wrong?

Was it addressed to you ? Or did you just feel giving your blow would help the situation?

As one of those who apparently didn't reply and who wasn't going because Im stuck up my own hole, favour a click (sic) and am uncharitable then yes it was. Stating that I had replied and given my reason is hardly a blow. If someone posts an untruth should it go unchallenged?

Tour negative reply followed with a thumbs up ... not hard to see through ...imo

Well my apologies for not responding in a positive fashion. I'll try to be a better person in future

I doubt it imo.... at the same time its not a matter of being more positive rather genuine !"

Careful now. It's starting to look a lot like you're doing exactly to me what you're accusing others of doing to the OP. It's wonderful to preach tolerance and magnanimity and kindness when your own words are not hard to see through...imo. Then again it's not a matter of being more positive rather than genuine isn't it.

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By *ustkrissMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks

Wow!! A couple of them up their own arse fabbers who run socials and charge money is because they run it as a business Also if a person charges to help cover the costs and it's so wrong why are these events mostly sold out.

I instantly said I wasn't going to your event because of a few things, none of them reasons I need to share with you. Now that you have shown how you really deal with things not going your way makes realise we made the right choice

Hit men are mostly busy ... dosnt equate to being right "

Hahaha

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?

The OP said he had "not as much as a reply back" and then went on to say it was because people were up their own holes. Am I wrong?

Was it addressed to you ? Or did you just feel giving your blow would help the situation?

As one of those who apparently didn't reply and who wasn't going because Im stuck up my own hole, favour a click (sic) and am uncharitable then yes it was. Stating that I had replied and given my reason is hardly a blow. If someone posts an untruth should it go unchallenged?

Tour negative reply followed with a thumbs up ... not hard to see through ...imo

Well my apologies for not responding in a positive fashion. I'll try to be a better person in future

I doubt it imo.... at the same time its not a matter of being more positive rather genuine !

Careful now. It's starting to look a lot like you're doing exactly to me what you're accusing others of doing to the OP. It's wonderful to preach tolerance and magnanimity and kindness when your own words are not hard to see through...imo. Then again it's not a matter of being more positive rather than genuine isn't it. "

Oh I don't pretend for one second to preach tolerance and the rest of your pedestal propaganda

My point always stems from honesty and conviction of stance . I don't put sheep's clothing on my points of view . Its clear as day ... you came straight out and had an underhanded dig at the op , not because you were referenced in their post, because you have a habit of telling people whats right and wrong on fab, and underhandedly stirring too. Each to their own

I prefer to try to be transparent.

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By *ustinSiderMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks"

I just think telling folks to "get a grip" is not really the best way to entice people to an event.

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"

Yes it is a digish post ... Not being as much of an onslaught as some posts can be from bandwagons doesn't really say much . Let's b******* it's still b*******

Lol

You went from 'this ' to the above pretty quick.

I'm impressed"

I think I mat have miss written the above .

What I mean is ill agree the ops post may have been a bit digish.. however to say they got less off the usual bandwagon onslaught isn't saying much considering its the norm to be slathered by the flock (ironic i know ) . Weather its less of the usual bullshit or not its still bullshit

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks

I just think telling folks to "get a grip" is not really the best way to entice people to an event."

Depends what your telling them to grip

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By *ustinSiderMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"After years off attending socials. We ourselves get a venue and hand out invites and not as much as a reply back from people more disappointing our social is for charity not like others to fill their own pockets get a grip folks

I just think telling folks to "get a grip" is not really the best way to entice people to an event.

Depends what your telling them to grip "

true

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?

The OP said he had "not as much as a reply back" and then went on to say it was because people were up their own holes. Am I wrong?

Was it addressed to you ? Or did you just feel giving your blow would help the situation?

As one of those who apparently didn't reply and who wasn't going because Im stuck up my own hole, favour a click (sic) and am uncharitable then yes it was. Stating that I had replied and given my reason is hardly a blow. If someone posts an untruth should it go unchallenged?

Tour negative reply followed with a thumbs up ... not hard to see through ...imo

Well my apologies for not responding in a positive fashion. I'll try to be a better person in future

I doubt it imo.... at the same time its not a matter of being more positive rather genuine !

Careful now. It's starting to look a lot like you're doing exactly to me what you're accusing others of doing to the OP. It's wonderful to preach tolerance and magnanimity and kindness when your own words are not hard to see through...imo. Then again it's not a matter of being more positive rather than genuine isn't it.

Oh I don't pretend for one second to preach tolerance and the rest of your pedestal propaganda

My point always stems from honesty and conviction of stance . I don't put sheep's clothing on my points of view . Its clear as day ... you came straight out and had an underhanded dig at the op , not because you were referenced in their post, because you have a habit of telling people whats right and wrong on fab, and underhandedly stirring too. Each to their own

I prefer to try to be transparent.

"

My spoon is nowhere big as you imagine. I wear my heart on my sleeve; there's nothing underhand about me. There are topics which I'm vocal about because of the impact they've had on me personally. If you interpret that, or any of my other forum interactions, as something agenda-driven that's down to you. Feel free to ignore my future contributions as you would any other shit stirrer

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Maybe the problem is that the OP had 2 different threads and one post on someone elses thread and the answers to all threads are coming in here.

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By *atriceWoman
over a year ago

ballymena northern ireland not donegal

Kinda rude Not doing yourselfs any favours who cares if organisers make a penny or two they deserve it for giving people a great night out

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

From our limited experience, people don't organise swing events to make money. They organise them because they enjoy it, they organise to bring people together and they also want to meet people themselves.

It's a labour of love (of sorts!) really.

When we get invites (not very often I might add!) or decide to request an invite to an event, we base our decision on the reputation of the organisers (veris, especially from those we know) and also their professionalism and proper communication of the details and requirements. If we get any hint to the contrary then we don't go as we've learned the hard way ourselves.

In a similar vein, the trick for organisers is to learn from mistakes if things don't work out. Try again with the new learnings and do a better job the next time.

Or just decide that it's too much hassle and raise the money for charity in another way

P.S. have you considered a swingers Karaoke night? People have been crying out for one on the forums but nobody has ever organised one. Something different might generate more interest. Good luck

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By *itemeagainMan
over a year ago

Wexford


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

The fact you replied means the OP wasn't addressing you in the original post surely you know that.?

The OP said he had "not as much as a reply back" and then went on to say it was because people were up their own holes. Am I wrong?

Was it addressed to you ? Or did you just feel giving your blow would help the situation?

As one of those who apparently didn't reply and who wasn't going because Im stuck up my own hole, favour a click (sic) and am uncharitable then yes it was. Stating that I had replied and given my reason is hardly a blow. If someone posts an untruth should it go unchallenged?

Tour negative reply followed with a thumbs up ... not hard to see through ...imo

Well my apologies for not responding in a positive fashion. I'll try to be a better person in future

I doubt it imo.... at the same time its not a matter of being more positive rather genuine !

Careful now. It's starting to look a lot like you're doing exactly to me what you're accusing others of doing to the OP. It's wonderful to preach tolerance and magnanimity and kindness when your own words are not hard to see through...imo. Then again it's not a matter of being more positive rather than genuine isn't it.

Oh I don't pretend for one second to preach tolerance and the rest of your pedestal propaganda

My point always stems from honesty and conviction of stance . I don't put sheep's clothing on my points of view . Its clear as day ... you came straight out and had an underhanded dig at the op , not because you were referenced in their post, because you have a habit of telling people whats right and wrong on fab, and underhandedly stirring too. Each to their own

I prefer to try to be transparent.

My spoon is nowhere big as you imagine. I wear my heart on my sleeve; there's nothing underhand about me. There are topics which I'm vocal about because of the impact they've had on me personally. If you interpret that, or any of my other forum interactions, as something agenda-driven that's down to you. Feel free to ignore my future contributions as you would any other shit stirrer

"

I don't ignore others

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By *eddybear37Man
over a year ago

everywhere kildare longford


"Well all I can say is not everyone has the time or money to attend every single social its very expensive for many...and calling many people out for not reading or replying is maybe due to status updates or attacking a group full of decent people with all the accusations and an email that basically said...you're invited to a social and here's the ticket link doesn't cut it! It's very poor effort if you ask me .....I've been to many socials over the years I've been on here and I'd say am well known and am extremely friendly and out going and I've also arranged a few small social gatherings myself which takes hard work and dedication and effort...

It's definitely easier to attend the bigger socials than try and arrange smaller ones but hey ho I ain't throwing my toys outta the pram when no one wants to attend!

Just gotta ask yourself why that might be?

You've complained so many times that might have something to do about it!

Over and out from me...

Well said

"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

"

Are you honestly trying to say that if it was anyone else invited you to a social on the same date you wouldn't go.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

Are you honestly trying to say that if it was anyone else invited you to a social on the same date you wouldn't go."

I work Saturday nights and I've already one booked off at the end of March so I wouldn't be able to get another one off. Also I have virtually no overtime in Feb so my March wage is going to be little over basic. I have two dental appointments (and potentially a third) in March that need to be paid for, and a child going to a gig who'll be needing travel and spending money. This is on top of the social I've already bought tickets and booked accommodation for. So no, it wouldn't matter who invited me to a social on that date or any other date in March I wouldn't be going.

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By *ORBCouple
over a year ago

Dundalk

We've been to 4 socials in total over a period of 3 years both on our singles profiles and this one. Three of those have been in the last year on this profile including one last week and there's a strong possibility we won't get to any more this year because of personal issues.

We didn't get an invitation to this event but we have had invitations to other events where we haven't replied to the organisers either because we have no interest in going or it just doesn't suit.

If we knew the organisers personally then yes we might respond to say thanks but no thanks but from someone we don't know and have never chatted to it's unlikely we will reply unless we were going.

Where the proceeds are going to doesn't come into the equation if we aren't able to go and we aren't in a position financially or have enough free time to travel all over for socials.

Just because we've gone to a few means absolutely nothing and doesn't mean we'll ever go to another one.

RB

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

Are you honestly trying to say that if it was anyone else invited you to a social on the same date you wouldn't go.

I work Saturday nights and I've already one booked off at the end of March so I wouldn't be able to get another one off. Also I have virtually no overtime in Feb so my March wage is going to be little over basic. I have two dental appointments (and potentially a third) in March that need to be paid for, and a child going to a gig who'll be needing travel and spending money. This is on top of the social I've already bought tickets and booked accommodation for. So no, it wouldn't matter who invited me to a social on that date or any other date in March I wouldn't be going. "

You do not have to explain your reasons for not going to the op or anyone else. You were good enough to reply to their message that they sent you about the social in the first place.They were the ones who said they got zero replies.

The fact they now are questioning you and expecting you to explain why says a lot more about them than you. Everyone has a life outside of fab and mngs that take precedence and no one should be expected to explain why they say no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I absolutely defend my right to reply. If I'm being called out -wrongly - in public then yep, I'm going to respond in public.

Because apparently no-one replied and the reason people aren't going is because they're stuck up their own holes and are part of some clique.

Like I said way back up there, I did reply to the OPs invitation and gave my reason. I'm sorry I can't ditch work every Saturday night for every event. I'm sorry I can't afford to go out several weekends in the month. I'm sorry I'm unable to help every single charitable cause. I'm sorry that I've already committed to another event in March. I'm sorry I'm not going to sit back and listen to the OP chat shit.

Are you honestly trying to say that if it was anyone else invited you to a social on the same date you wouldn't go.

I work Saturday nights and I've already one booked off at the end of March so I wouldn't be able to get another one off. Also I have virtually no overtime in Feb so my March wage is going to be little over basic. I have two dental appointments (and potentially a third) in March that need to be paid for, and a child going to a gig who'll be needing travel and spending money. This is on top of the social I've already bought tickets and booked accommodation for. So no, it wouldn't matter who invited me to a social on that date or any other date in March I wouldn't be going.

You do not have to explain your reasons for not going to the op or anyone else. You were good enough to reply to their message that they sent you about the social in the first place.They were the ones who said they got zero replies.

The fact they now are questioning you and expecting you to explain why says a lot more about them than you. Everyone has a life outside of fab and mngs that take precedence and no one should be expected to explain why they say no."

At this point, unless things change drastically, I already know which socials I'll be able to attend between now and the end of August. Even that is dependent on my work approving my 2023/24 holiday requests. As much as I'd love to be able to run the length and breadth of the country, sadly this isn't possible no matter how much some others believe it to be so.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

These posts with more than one paragraph are a killer

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By *kybornMan
over a year ago

Mullingar

Lot of time wasted typing going on here - I’m busy doing what this site intends me (you all) to do

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By *elfastSteamWhistleMan
over a year ago

bangor

I didn't even get an invite. Does that mean I'm even further up my own arse?

This was a fun read

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