FabSwingers.com forum: Direct approach from men?

By *iddle aged Spice OP Man
over a year ago

ennis

Just asking, in social settings or even while chatting casually wherever(including in work), what’s yer thoughts on how direct should a fella be in getting to the point of asking the lady if they are interested in sexual or nsa fun.

Is the direct approach off putting or is it the way to go, now that peoples lives are so busy and maybe some don’t like wasting lots of time building an approach!!

Or do ladies like to build things slowly over time? Is it different for married ladies as opposed to single? Is it a case that some appreciate direct approach, and some will bawl you out for it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn't be too impressed if a male work colleague randomly suggested nsa during a work conversation

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By *iddle aged Spice OP Man
over a year ago

ennis

[Removed by poster at 27/08/22 13:06:20]

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By *iddle aged Spice OP Man
over a year ago

ennis

"Wouldn't be too impressed if a male work colleague randomly suggested nsa during a work conversation "

Ok yes I appreciate that a random nsa request from a work colleague mightn’t be appreciated. I should qualify that by saying if there’s flirting or sexual innuendo going on with a work colleague. Is there a right time to ask the hard (excuse pun) question!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, I wouldn't welcome an approach from a colleague, ever.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Definitly try keep it out of a work setting. (Speaking from experience

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You always have to have the option to walk away fully if you get a no or if a yes turns to fun but ends badly....

So friends, family connections/friends or work and any combo of those are dangerous playgrounds to step in to.

Definitely a no-go from me

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By *eralt80Man
over a year ago

cork

As with many things in life I try and live by the motto not to shit where you eat.

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By *iddle aged Spice OP Man
over a year ago

ennis

Ok I get the vibe re the work setting scenario, and fully realise how tricky that could get. How about in social setting few drinks, chatting etc!!

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By *antra MassageMan
over a year ago

South Side.

Never in a work situation. Ive seen quite a few male colleagues in deep dooda, after responding to flirty female colleagues. Its never worth the risk.

In a social situation, I'm cautious and interested, im not out to pull, but to get to know her. If shes interested in going further, im open.. But patient .

If you need to pull her, and score on first meeting, you're being led by an organ detached from its brain. I gather from your post, this might not be working for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In a social setting though is it not seem as meeting someone on here, or a dating site where you get to know the person and if you're attracted to them, chatting about what you looking fir.

I'm looking for a fwb, regular fun with a guy , odd night away, weekends away, but not the expectations of a full on relationship

So I guess my answer would be if I was in a bar tonight and a guy I'd never met asked straight up about having nsa set id be no thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a difference between being open & communicating your wants in an environment where sex is at the forefront (e.g. FAB etc) and straight-up propositioning some random person in a social setting that has not necessarily got anything to do with a hook-up scene (e.g. your local).

Chances are more than high you'd get either slapped or barred depending on the self-control of whoever you're asking.

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By *rakesterlingMan
over a year ago

Dublin

Eh... As much as it might be a turn on and so on, the old adaige of pissing into the well where you drink from strongly applies here

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By *otownkid1967Man
over a year ago

Portlaoise

No No No

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Even in a situation where they reciprocate the approach it leaves any future work relations in a dangerous setting as these thing generally get out and idle gossip can sour things along with the fact that if the meet doesn't go well it will be dam awkward at work. Leave it be.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

In a work environment this is totally inappropriate.

In a vanilla social environment its fine, but don't expect the person in the street to react positively. You will probably come across as creepy.

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By *iddle aged Spice OP Man
over a year ago

ennis

Ok appreciate yer thoughts. Maybe my original post didn’t get exactly what I meant. Agree actually with all yer sentiments. I suppose more was asking is there any situation where a lady likes a fella to proceed with a more direct approach.

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By *easingTimMan
over a year ago

Loughlinstown

Tbh Op, I think it would be a bit inappropriate to directly ask a woman for sex in a work or most social settings (barring a swingers club or FAB coffee meet perhaps). Yes, it's okay for a man to be chatty or even a little cheeky charming

if there's basic chemistry there

but to ask a woman straight out for sex is a bold and dumb move...

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