FabSwingers.com forum: Today I found out that I'll never be able to eat cake again

By *ungry Cat OP Couple
over a year ago

Belfast

I've known many of you forumites online for many years now, have met many of you in person too, am proud to call many of you friends, at the same time I know many hate me for my sarcastic and outspoken attitude. It's okay, we can't all get along

Most already know that I've been diagnosed with breast cancer last October and it's been quite a yourney going from a lump to full mastectomy to 6 courses of aggressive chemo to 3 weeks of radiotherapy to now a menopause in full swing at 33 caused by hormone blockers, sprinkled with hot flushes, mood swings, night sweats and swolen ankles.

I've always had a very positive attitude about all of this, I mean it's not that scary to lose some hair and feel under weather for a few days every 3 weeks, mastectomy is just a scar too - no biggie, radiotherapy was a breeze - great banter with doctors for 15mins (I called it very polite breath play) while a massive apparatus is just making creepy faces at you (many will know what I'm talking about)...

Then the hormone blockers kicked in and I spiralled into a menopause that arrived 20ish years earlier than expected.

I was okay with it too. Being a grumpy old woman at times, yes, occasionally giving Dirk a hard time, yes, but I'm finally cancer free growing my eyebrows back and just waiting on my brand new shiny boob job.

But today was different.

One phone call turned my life upside down.

My cancer was fed by estrogen- I knew that already hence my very firm and strong stand against estrogen (factory made estrogen replica still increases the risk of developing cancers) based contraception.

Today I found out that it's also genetic. Caused by mutation of a single gene which increases my chances of getting breast cancer again to very high as well as ovarian and pancreatic cancer.

All my life I've been fit and strong and never sick, never afraid of moving the mountains so I can walk through the valley between them.

This time I know I will have to change my whole life if I want to live without having to go through all of that mess of a treatment all over again.

No more cakes for me, no sugar, no weekend alcohol, no processed food, no vaping, no smoking, no bread, no pasta, no pancakes, no crisps (I fucking love crisps so much!) no donuts, no ice cream, no chocolate, no take aways, no McDonald's, no sausage, no bacon, no cereal... list goes on.

Just meat, cheese and veggies for the rest of my life... if I want to have a life.

This post is here to vent as well as raise awareness to the fact that anyone can get cancer when they least expect it.

Anyone can live with it too.

Just please be aware of what you consume on a daily basis, especially when it comes to hormonal contraception if you have any family members who have had cancer in the past.

Hope I didn't damper the mood too much.

Missus

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By *phrodite72Woman
over a year ago

dublin/galway

Sending love and hugs you are a warrior princess and the strongest woman I know

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By *ooo wet tight hornyWoman
over a year ago

lancashire

"I've known many of you forumites online for many years now, have met many of you in person too, am proud to call many of you friends, at the same time I know many hate me for my sarcastic and outspoken attitude. It's okay, we can't all get along

Then the hormone blockers kicked in and I spiralled into a menopause that arrived 20ish years earlier than expected.

But today was different.

One phone call turned my life upside down.

Today I found out that it's also genetic. Caused by mutation of a single gene which increases my chances of getting breast cancer again to very high as well as ovarian and pancreatic cancer.

All my life I've been fit and strong and never sick, never afraid of moving the mountains so I can walk through the valley between them.

This time I know I will have to change my whole life if I want to live without having to go through all of that mess of a treatment all over again.

Just meat, cheese and veggies for the rest of my life... if I want to have a life.

This post is here to vent as well as raise awareness to the fact that anyone can get cancer when they least expect it.

Anyone can live with it too.

Just please be aware of what you consume on a daily basis, especially when it comes to hormonal contraception if you have any family members who have had cancer in the past.

Hope I didn't damper the mood too much.

Missus "

Well OP my heart goes out to you and everything you have had to and still are having to deal with...life has dealt you with bad times. I truly hope things get better for you...x

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By *ottie00Woman
over a year ago

Dublin

It's not much to send with what you have and are going through but I admire you and think you are amazing. Thank you for sharing with us all

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By *eanbelfastMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Far from dampening the mood it just reminds me how we should face life. You won’t mean to be but personally I think you’re an inspiration and you’ve put a few things into perspective for me. You’ve always been an amazing woman which is clear to see for anyone who has spoken with you even briefly. You will continue to make others smile and keep taking the time to smile yourself and enjoy all life has to offer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My beautiful friend sending you the biggest hug virtually, your determination to fight the cancer has been an inspiration from the start and you will take the next part of your journey by the short and curlys, I love ya xx

And of course hugs to dirk too xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You dont dampen my mood ever Missus.

My heart aches for you, what you've been through and now the news of what you face ahead.

But there's a power in you that looks outward, to share and connect and that is a blessing to us all

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By *tslife222Man
over a year ago

by the sea louth

After reading the post, I don’t what to say really.,I’ve tears in my eyes.

Life can be soo hard at times.

I hope you get through all this and reach the other side of cancer.

My dad has been in remission 20 odd years and also has to watch his lifestyle.

He’s very Ill at present in hospital

I’m going to say a prayer to my higher power for both of you tonight.

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By *m_impact_playMan
over a year ago

Dublin

"I know many hate me for my sarcastic and outspoken attitude. It's okay, we can't all get along "

Not only I did not hate you for your opinions, I wished I had your talent at expressing my thoughts in writing as you have.

Big hugs and I wish you all the strength in the world.

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By *eijaWoman
over a year ago

City Centre

What an amazingly brave and strong woman. I'm sorry you have been through so much but you have an amazing attitude to life which we totally admire!

Sending you a massive virtual hug from us both.

B & S xx

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By *ngel and EvilCouple
over a year ago

Belfast

Sending you the biggest hugs, kisses and positive vibes for this next part of your journey my friend. And i feel priviledged to call you that. You are indeed an inspiration to us all. You never dampen any mood. Always here with a listening ear if/when you need to rant, rave, shout and express it all, and also to have a laugh, giggle and good time too. Love ya loads. Angel xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So sorry too hear that you first and foremost and himself and everyone close too you guys have been through what you have been through keep the fight going and reading your posts we are sure you guys will beat this stay positive

L&S

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By *ittlemisspumpkinWoman
over a year ago

I'm sending all the good vibes your way for the future and know that I'm always here if you want to scream and cry and rant etc...

I think the world of you and all you've had to deal with this last year, just shows what a strong lady you are.. your one of the most gorgeous ladies I have ever met and I'm soo privileged to know you...

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By *rakesterlingMan
over a year ago

Dublin

I wish you all the luck and providence and hope that you will be able to weather this storm through.

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By *wo Cakes on a PlateCouple
over a year ago

West Dublin

We are very sorry for your loss.

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By *uriousVoyeurMan
over a year ago

Northside

Missus, reading your post will do the opposite of putting a dampener on people's mood! Your attitude and positive outlook will hopefully inspire those starting on their own cancer journey. Having beaten cancer in 2015,I take every single day as a blessing. I found the doctors and particularly the nurses that looked after me were brilliant and they made my chemo and radiation days more than bearable. Initially I found the craic and laughing in the chemo ward very odd and I'm definitely a glass half full type of person. But as one nurse put it "sure if ya didn't laugh you'd cry"! You've really been through the ringer and I'm delighted to hear you're out the other side. Although you've a tough road ahead, judging by the strength you've shown in your post,I'm sure you'll be absolutely fine!! A quote I read while going through my own treatment really helped put it all into perspective for me..."You don't know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have"! Sending hugs and best wishes to you and your family. X

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By *uriousVoyeurMan
over a year ago

Northside

PS. Cake is overrated anyway!!

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Does this mean I dont have to share my real Tayto and Donuts with you again....sad about that to be honest but still sending love and hugs to you and Dirk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/08/22 23:50:41]

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By *elfastblondMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I've only ever chatted to you in the chat room but your post really touched me, having lost someone to cancer

I wish you every health and happiness from this day forward x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

By nipponoodlesFind posts by nipponoodles Man

just this minute!

swingerville Meath

Thank you so much for sharing. Unfortunately cancer hits lots of us but you have been dealt a tough hand. Your inspirational text will inspire anyone thank you for that. I've gone through cancer twice, operations etc, but as other users have said you get stronger and appreciate life. I kept a blog every day during 5 months of chemo, mainly so I could get rid of each day, but also let the people who cared for me how I was. Stay strong...P.S. I love Crisps too...sending the biggest hug. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow such a strong inspiring post. Well done you, I know it's a horrible dirty fight not just for your but your partner family and friends. I hope you've got past the hardest part keep that beautiful smile shining and keep that head up. #cancersucks keep up the good fight

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I am so sorry to hear this Missus and I think you have been amazing, especially how positive you have been throughout your battle.

Life at times is just so unfair and hits you with curve balls that can knock the legs right out from you just when you believe things are on the way up.

What you have been through in the last year is a testament to your strength and resilience. And with Dirk and your friends by your side you can get through anything that life throws at you. X

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By *cottybear74Man
over a year ago

kilkenny

Mrs I'm so sorry to hear that news, and tho I do not know you all that well I am sure that you are a fighter and will kick this in the balls as it deserves.

Massive scotty hug for you xx

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By *an I Kiss youMan
over a year ago

Manchester City Centre

Oh Gosh, what an inspiration you are Missus !

Girl, your strength and fighting spirit are exceptional. Even though we've never met before, I still felt like I've known you for a lifetime and I can only hope that one day I will have the privilege of your friendship and of meeting you and Dirk to celebrate your win of this harsh fight. I am sure your win is inevitable.

Keep the chin up girl, you are amazing xxx.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have never spoken to you before Missus. Your post is very inspiring to anyone fighting a similar battle either for themselves or a family member.

I am so pleased to hear you kicked the buggers ass and am look forward to seeing your new image.

All the very best for the future x

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Keep doing you and moving forward.

Cake is overrated anyway

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By *avy8931Man
over a year ago

ballymena

I've never met you or chatted to you but always love your profile posts. No crap. Just say it as it is. Plus I like perving lol. I just want to wish you all the best for the future and if you ever are in the mood for a Chinese takeaway let me know. I'll eat it for you and send you the pictures and tell you how good it tastes lol. Sorry just my humour. Stay strong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Meh...cake is so overrated - clean eating is where it's at!

You never cease to amaze me with how you've handled everything that's been thrown at you this past year. You're bloody brilliant and I wish you - and Dirk - love, lightness of heart and fortitude of spirit for the next stage in your recovery. Much love Missus xx

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By *DSGCouple
over a year ago

That place in

You can get some lovely cake made from cheese, Sheridan are fantastic do a great range and can shop on line, hope this helps a little x

Was so lovely meeting you both over the weekend, your an amazing, strong woman and Dirk not bad either, sending you warm squash hugs and positive thoughts to you both xx

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

You're certainly a fighter, Misses and a very inspiring one with your positive attitude and the enormous strength and courage you display. Excellent news that you're cancer free! I wish you all best on your future journey, may it be a happy and healthy one.

Now I know everyone behaved on this thread but I can't help myself (I know you'll understand

) and add some remarks/question to your new strict diet, I'm not an expert but:

I can't see why you shouldn't eat pasta or bread anymore especially when you choose the wholemeal version of it and/or when you make it yourself, at least then you know what went into it.

I'd stay away from red meat.

Finally I agree with Reality cake is overrated especially on here

The ones from the shop are a pile of palm oil, sugar and stabilisers. Yuk. Like all processed food, it should be forbidden altogether.

Now excuse the grumpy old menopausal woman, I've to make the most of the lovely day.

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By *oxyvixen99Woman
over a year ago

Newtownabbey

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By *issTinyWoman
over a year ago

omagh

Huge hugs to you, a hard fight xxx

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By *exy Saucy SocialsCouple
over a year ago

Dublin

Hugs and kisses super warrior xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi Missus. Just to say I’ve always liked your posts.

And Thanks for sharing openly and showing all this vulnerability in a site like fab. It’s so inspiring. It’s a sign of true strength, when everyone knows your weak points but you don’t give a flying f because they can’t be used against you anymore.

There are always alternatives thankfully so it might take sometime, but I’m sure you will get used to the newness in your diet.

Stay strong

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By *antricswingMan
over a year ago

louth

I enjoyed meeting yous at the camping , would never have guessed . I admire your courage and strength for sharing this . Regards to Dirk . Cake is overrated and you’re the mistress of cards against humanity .

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By *tiffler400Man
over a year ago

belfast

We have never met or even chatted but you sound like a fighter and I wish you all the best.

Keep your chin up and try to stay strong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow, that's an amazing post. I'm glad you did it! And even more glad that you're ok, though missing the nice foods we all love. It reminded me of how life can twist and turn, and hit us in the face again and again...I guess alot more than one person reading your post will get a diagnosis that will change their world.

Look after yourself, love yourself loads, and thanks for sharing!! xx

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By * la carteCouple
over a year ago

Dublin

Words fail me, I've started a post a number of times and nothing I say seems to feel right.

You're quite obviously an inspiration for many, a pillar of strength, a vessel of opportunities...I hope that you are able to hold on to that positivity and that love for life to keep you not only healthy, but happy and content with your life.

I believe when you're faced with your own mortality, everything within you, gives you a different outlook. I understand that you have changed your diet a good while back (if I remember correctly), so missing those treats will hopefully soon become a thing of the past as you find more meaningful things in life to replace them with.

I wish for you to remain healthy and to keep us on our toes with your posts. Hopefully some day, I/we will have the pleasure of meeting you socially.

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

God that's tough, puts things in perspective for us all. Wishing you the best of luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OMG. That is awful. Very sorry. No words can convey my reaction. I hope despite your news you have a long and happy life.

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By *otownkid1967Man
over a year ago

Portlaoise

Never met or chatted,but have seen lots of your forum posts. I believe that you are a person with a very strong will. You are meeting this head on which is the only. May you live long and prosper.

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By *ichael McCarthyMan
over a year ago

Lucan

[Removed by poster at 25/08/22 15:54:57]

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By *ichael McCarthyMan
over a year ago

Lucan

That's tough op. Fair play for sharing. Best of luck in your battles.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a brave woman you are!!!! Very impressed and very touched for your willingness to share your story here.. kudos to you

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By *on Draper2.0Man
over a year ago

Maynooth

Not much anyone can really say to make you feel better but the outpouring of love for you here is so touching. I don't know you, never talked to you but I feel for you. What an absolute kick in the groin though, to have one of the few things that can still bring you a bit of pleasure taken away as well.

While you're breathing, you're still in the fight though! You never know when that breakthrough treatment will come to fruition.

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By *exysamXXXWoman
over a year ago

The Land of Make Believe

Wishing you all the best. Your positive energy is amazing for what you have been through and what lies ahead.

You are an inspiration to us all.

Keep well xx

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By *ensualnFunCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Wow what an amazing post! OP you are an inspiration, your outlook on life is so full of energy and positivity. Your fighting spirit is admirable. You’ve certainly put some perspective in my life.

Thank you for your post. I wish you all the best and a full and long life.

Looking forward to meeting you in October.

Celine xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Missus you have shown incredible strength and resilience to this illness, I'm so sorry to hear it's taken another turn on you again. If a anything comes from make these changes with diet it will be positive, you will be hopefully getting more energy. I know nothing I can say will help bit I do think you are so courageous sharing your journey here and thank you. It's great to see such strong women empowering others.

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