FabSwingers.com forum: Give me one good reason why you are not a stripper

By *asual777 OP Man
over a year ago

i travel all over

From the lounge

Just not coordinated enough . It would be just stilted and awkward

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The fecking shoes

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Id make Danny Devito in friends look good

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By *ungry CatCouple
over a year ago

Belfast

Too old, too fat, not enough boobs, short legs and my wig would probably fall off while doing the upside down thingys

Missus

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By *ungleJayMan
over a year ago

Dublin

One time I fell over taking my boxers off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My poor kids would starve

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By *oseredWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

[Removed by poster at 14/07/22 19:54:56]

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By *oseredWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

Too old, too large and I have a Mortgage to pay.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The oil would get stuck in my chest hair

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By *ob198XaMan
over a year ago

teleford

Cause I don’t have a cock of a horse

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By *uess.who30Man
over a year ago

Galway/Dublin/London

They just haven't discovered me yet..

Strip teases are fun.. but ladies you'll have to work for that private dance

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By *s LollyWoman
over a year ago

The pub then supermacs ...

To old,to fat and allergic to glitter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suffer from the cold

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I suffer from the cold"

Feck yeah, I'd have to take my socks off

Feet would drop off with the cold

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By *ensualandslow321Man
over a year ago

Tullamore

Have you seen my thighs

they're not for human consumption Lol

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By *ANG8LOOSEMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Would take me forever trying get my clothes off by myself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tried a strip tease while slightly d*unk and faceplanted the floor. Still got the ride though

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By *affa31Woman
over a year ago

Galway

I’d definitely fall over

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By *NawtyCplCouple
over a year ago

Around and about

Need to give the other strippers a chance......

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By *hett and scarlettCouple
over a year ago

Dublin

I’d probably have to get the sack and crack waxed and I’m really not brave enough.

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By *iscuits8Man
over a year ago

Meath / Dublin / Birmingham

I'd get cold and my mickey would shrivel up to a tiny little peanut size leading to embarrassment all round. Very short lived career...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d probably have to get the sack and crack waxed and I’m really not brave enough.

Pussy

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By *oxic1998Woman
over a year ago

Belfast

I'd empty the place instead of filling it

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By *hett and scarlettCouple
over a year ago

Dublin

"I’d probably have to get the sack and crack waxed and I’m really not brave enough.

Pussy

Yeah, I’d have to man up. Plus, if I stopped working out then I quickly turn into Bang Bang Bart (it’s worth a Google imho)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The pole would get lost between the cheeks of my arse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d probably have to get the sack and crack waxed and I’m really not brave enough.

Pussy

Yeah, I’d have to man up. Plus, if I stopped working out then I quickly turn into Bang Bang Bart (it’s worth a Google imho)

It was worth a Google

The black pvc jocks tho....drool

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

I'd laugh my way through it, ruining the mood. Mrs

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By *sLittleRedRidingHoodWoman
over a year ago

Magical Forrest

I wouldn’t be able to keep a straight face

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By *ay_Gatsby_D4Man
over a year ago

Ballsbridge, City Centre

My balls would clack off my ankles when i gyrated

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

"My balls would clack off my ankles when i gyrated"

Sher wouldn't the sound effects only add to your performance

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"My balls would clack off my ankles when i gyrated"

Reminds me of the toy when we were kids

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My balls would clack off my ankles when i gyrated

Sher wouldn't the sound effects only add to your performance

Only if he has rhythm

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By *ay_Gatsby_D4Man
over a year ago

Ballsbridge, City Centre

"My balls would clack off my ankles when i gyrated

Sher wouldn't the sound effects only add to your performance

Only if he has rhythm "

I don’t have rhythm but I was only to pick one reason why I couldn’t be a stripper so my gut instinct was my balls….

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By *unsigntwoCouple
over a year ago

athlone

1 can dance in heel

2 laugh the whole way through it

3 do my back in as I fall off the shoes

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By *on655Man
over a year ago

east suburbs

I couldn’t afford to replace the clothes I’d be ripping off

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By *amesy6918Man
over a year ago

newry

Would slip of the pole!!

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By *inion42Man
over a year ago

minionland

Cos I don’t get paid to take my clothes off, I’m a naturist

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By *arry and AnnCouple
over a year ago

Louth

Who says im not?

Queue Ann slipping 5ers in me jocks as i do a chippendales routine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take everything else off but please leave the hat on

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By *iggsy1984Man
over a year ago

Dublin, D16

Love bein naked and bein watched but I’m a shit dancer

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By *DSGCouple
over a year ago

That place in

Be always late so I'd be sacked

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By *OCONO5Couple
over a year ago

Sensual Center

I have nobble knees and hairy legs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The hours don’t suit my sleep schedule

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My balls would clack off my ankles when i gyrated"

Take a punters eye out.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My assless chaps are in the wash

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My assless chaps are in the wash

You need a spare pair

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By *ildAtlanticSecretCouple
over a year ago

around Clare, Galway, Limerick

Couldn't deal with the glitter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wiggle that booty to warm ya

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By *ouple 0073Couple
over a year ago

donegal

The money's terrible

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By *acob12369Man
over a year ago

URPANTS

Did my cruciate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd be covered in oil, slipping all over the stage... more comedy than eroticism

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't dance

I can't talk

Only thing about me is the way I walk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always thought it would be my ideal job a dancer but lol real life got in the way ie the fridge! Oh and the DUP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Both of us would like to be professional strippers which is why we use swinging as an outlet for our exhibitionist tendencies. We’re far from perfect but happy in our own skin.

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By *easingTimMan
over a year ago

Loughlinstown

My "sexy dance moves" are more Alvin and Theodore from the Chipmunks than Chippendale

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would have the grace of an elephant instead of a gazelle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like my fab meets I finish too quickly and people feel robbed

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By *ittle Miss PuddlesCouple
over a year ago

Your fantasies

As soon as someone opens up a strip club in rural Tipperary with an opening for a "mature' stripper I'll be the first in line to audition

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because am not like channing tantum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As soon as someone opens up a strip club in rural Tipperary with an opening for a "mature' stripper I'll be the first in line to audition

Oh oh oh... we can call it The Premier Pole

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By *ittle Miss PuddlesCouple
over a year ago

Your fantasies

"As soon as someone opens up a strip club in rural Tipperary with an opening for a "mature' stripper I'll be the first in line to audition

Oh oh oh... we can call it The Premier Pole"

It could be a fantastic business opportunity. There's not many sheep in these parts

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By *aid backMan
over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

The last time I went near a pole I brought the whole thing down and cracked my skull open

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The last time I went near a pole I brought the whole thing down and cracked my skull open

Yes I remember that...

Good job it's a tough skull

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By *aid backMan
over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

"The last time I went near a pole I brought the whole thing down and cracked my skull open

Yes I remember that...

Good job it's a tough skull"

Big mallet head done more damage to the floor than my head

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By *ouble Trouble 1000Couple
over a year ago

ireland

Too shy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Chub rub.......

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By *eeisbackMan
over a year ago

….

Health system is on its knees coulndt put any more pressure on it by all the faints id cause If i weer to strip

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By *ngel and EvilCouple
over a year ago

Belfast

Too old, too fat, no rythm, probably get paid more to keep my clothes on!

Angel

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By *phrodite72Woman
over a year ago

dublin/galway

"Too old, too fat, no rythm, probably get paid more to keep my clothes on!

Angel"

You my darling are a stunning sexy gorgeous woman the guys b lining up

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By *phrodite72Woman
over a year ago

dublin/galway

"Too old, too fat, not enough boobs, short legs and my wig would probably fall off while doing the upside down thingys

Missus "

Seriously u sexy as fuck biiiiiatch

No lie my daughter was on my phone saw your kik pic and was like who is she shes stunning and soooo bad ass

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because i just don't think kt would be good for my overall health.

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

Both my chronotype and my morphology would render me inappropriate!

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By *atherjackhackettMan
over a year ago

Tipperary

I think I'd get paid more to leave my clothes on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A woman, very good friend and a stripper that I hung out with in New York, back in the day told me that I would look somewhat underwhelming in a g-string posing pouch. Given that she was a professional, I took her advice!!! ??????

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By *murphMan
over a year ago

drogheda

Don’t have the body shape lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The heels would kill me

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By *vpamelaTV/TS
over a year ago

kinkville

I don't like working nights tbh

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By *lassy lady 216Woman
over a year ago

Craigavon

Yes people would pay me more to keep my clothes on as well lol fair play to anyone that does it I just wouldn't have the confidence

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By *rakesterlingMan
over a year ago

Dublin

I am not that desperate to induce mass hysteria and kick off the end of the world?

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By *eijaWoman
over a year ago

City Centre

Not with my knees

B x

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By *egsandcurvesWoman
over a year ago

sexytown

I'd get sued cause my boobs would poke someone's eye out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They get paid to do it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They’d need a binoculars glass to see me do the helicopter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too fat,old,short legs...

and list grows longer and longer...

could be great comedy sketch though

Will go and polish My skills

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By *eepixieWoman
over a year ago

Belfast

Sitting in Starbucks absolutely roaring at this!! Thanks guys for giving me a good laugh & curious stares with my coffee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't like people

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