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Awfully bored, favorite joke ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yet again I’m at home bored. Tell me your favorite joke ?

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

This was my favourite joke from my university years in Belfast:

Two guys talking together at a party; one asks,

Why is a woman's ass, so near her pussy?

The other replies:

So when she gets d*unk, I can pick her up like a six pack (of beer) and take her home!

Graphic, crude, blokish, memorable, but funny?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lady went to a Doctor, she told the Doctor "Doctor postage stamps keep appearing in my fanny" the Doctor examines her and says " Sorry Missus but they are not postage stamps they are banana stickers".

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By *ot such a shyboy990Man
over a year ago

Dublin

Two nun's in the bath and one says wares the soap and other one says yes it does doesn't it ??????

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By *s LollyWoman
over a year ago

The pub then supermacs ...


"A lady went to a Doctor, she told the Doctor "Doctor postage stamps keep appearing in my fanny" the Doctor examines her and says " Sorry Missus but they are not postage stamps they are banana stickers". "

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By *on655Man
over a year ago

Bronte

Paddy and Mick are walking down the road, and Paddy’s got a bag of doughnuts in his hand.

Paddy says to Mick, “If you can guess how many doughnuts are in my bag, you can have them both.”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What has 4 wheels and flies?

A bin lorry

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By *eastMan
over a year ago

Oranmore

Why do elephants have big ears?

Cause Noddy wouldn’t pay the ransom…..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why didn't Barbie ever get pregnant?

Because Ken came in a different box...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why didn't Barbie ever get pregnant?

Because Ken came in a different box..."

Ha ha very good. I not a big joke person myself because most I either don't get just think they are stupid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why did the pervert crossed the road ?

Cause he stuck up the Chicken

Lol

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By *ot such a shyboy990Man
over a year ago

Dublin

[Removed by poster at 13/06/22 11:58:12]

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By *ot such a shyboy990Man
over a year ago

Dublin

Why are women like a hurricane because when they cum they are warm wet and wild...and when they leave they take the house .car and kids

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By *ursecretmischiefCouple
over a year ago

The West

A bus full of Nuns falls of a cliff and they all die. They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Peter.

St. Peter says to them “Sisters, welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all though the pearly gates, but before I may do that, I must ask each of you a single question. ”

St. Peter turns to the first Nun in the line and asks her “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” The Sister Responds “Well… there was this one time… that I kinda sorta… touched one with the tip of my pinky finger…” St. Peter says “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.

St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” “Well…. There was this one time… that I held one for a moment…” “Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.

Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another! St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!” Sister Susan responds “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her arse in it!”

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By * la carteCouple
over a year ago

Dublin

JAPANESE SEX

A Japanese couple is arguing about how to perform highly erotic sex.

Husband: "Sukitaki. Mojitaka!"

Wife replies: "Kowanini! Mowi janakpa!" Husband says angrily: "Toka a anji rodi roumi yakoo!"

Wife, on her knees, literally begging:

"Mimi Nakoundinda tinkouji!"

Husband shouts angrily: "Na miaou kina Tim kouji!"

I can't believe you just sat there trying to read this!

You don't know any Japanese!

You'll read anything as long as it's about sex....

Sometimes I worry about you.

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By *ichael McCarthyMan
over a year ago

Lucan


"JAPANESE SEX

A Japanese couple is arguing about how to perform highly erotic sex.

Husband: "Sukitaki. Mojitaka!"

Wife replies: "Kowanini! Mowi janakpa!" Husband says angrily: "Toka a anji rodi roumi yakoo!"

Wife, on her knees, literally begging:

"Mimi Nakoundinda tinkouji!"

Husband shouts angrily: "Na miaou kina Tim kouji!"

I can't believe you just sat there trying to read this!

You don't know any Japanese!

You'll read anything as long as it's about sex....

Sometimes I worry about you. "

I thought it read going to be something like the one about the American businessman in Tokyo for a business meeting. One evening he met a hooker and brought her back to his hotel. He's going at her doggy style and he's really enjoying himself, pounding her as hard and as wild as he possibly can. She then starts screaming and moaning "machigatta ana! Machigatta Ana!". He figures she's really enjoying it and pounds harder as she screams it louder and louder. Eventually he cums and she gets up to leave saying "Machigatta Ana" again as she's leaving. He's delighted with himself.

The following day he's invited to play golf with the Japanese heads of the company and although he has no Japanese he decides to try and impress them. When his boss hits a magnificent chip off the the fairway straight into the hole he applauds and shouts "machigatta ana, machigatta ana!"

The Japanese guys all look at him and the boss asks... "what do you mean" wrong hole? "

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By *otass and scorpioCouple
over a year ago

limerick cork tipperary clare waterford

Female weightlifter goes to the doc and says “doc I’ve been taking supplements and now I’ve started to grow a small cock “ doc says “Anybolics” ? And she says no just the cock so far !! ….

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