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The art of conversation

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By *asual777 OP   Man
over a year ago

i travel all over

From the lounge

Is this a dying art?

I read messages (with consent) sent to a female friend who was struggling to read hundreds which had accumulated. Many just said how are you or are you enjoying fab?

Some were repeats with the exact same question asked very recently .

Was just curious as to whether this was the product of not putting in the effort due to a sense of ‘there is no point’ or the opposite : poor quality of conversation from messages driving little interest in looking at them and answering them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plenty of threads discussing this and opinions, some prefer a long message some prefer short ones. Personally when I get a message, before I even open the message I look at profile if something in the profile interests me I open message the message, if not I just delete.

Quality over quantity? Prefer a good profile over a message.

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By *ittlekinks38Woman
over a year ago

outside belfast x

I've just put also exact same post up too! Have a wee look there though most replies aren't helpful lol am just trying to help others but seemingly that's not on either

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By *asual777 OP   Man
over a year ago

i travel all over

Just saw it now !!

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By *3nsesMan
over a year ago

Dublin


"Plenty of threads discussing this and opinions, some prefer a long message some prefer short ones. Personally when I get a message, before I even open the message I look at profile if something in the profile interests me I open message the message, if not I just delete.

Quality over quantity? Prefer a good profile over a message.

"

This post basically sums up why it is a waste of time putting much effort into the first message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Plenty of threads discussing this and opinions, some prefer a long message some prefer short ones. Personally when I get a message, before I even open the message I look at profile if something in the profile interests me I open message the message, if not I just delete.

Quality over quantity? Prefer a good profile over a message.

This post basically sums up why it is a waste of time putting much effort into the first message. "

But it's only my opinion so wouldn't take that with a pinch of salt

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By *herry...Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

I get alot of the same opening messages, If they contain questions I already have answered in my bio, it's a clear sign they haven't read my profile, it's very hard to distinguish what is a good first message, I have sent some and got no reply so it's the same as everything in life you just have to take the good with the bad...

Just my two cents worth

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By *r-JayMan
over a year ago

somewhere

As I look at it most people are brought up in away were it's common when you meet someone for the first time face to face you would greet them and ask how they were doing, so just seems normal nature to do it in a message. I actually find it rude when state in some bios not to do it, yes I understand its repetitive but let's face fact you will make your way to the profile check it out and if you like what you see you will reply anyway, the amount of 'interesting' messages I've did and still no reply not that I'm entitled to one but if you ask for effort then you should at least put the effort to say you're not interested. So I'd say it's a combo of how people would speak normally face to face and also realizing putting in the effort has no benefit either

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By *r_Insatiable666Man
over a year ago

Cork

Don't wanna give away the secret so that it'll become the new normal

I don't think a greeting is such a bad thing but yeah when you're getting 100s, it's good to stick out but what are you meant to say to a profile that's "fill in later"

I tend to find the best written profiles are also the soundest, unless you're expecting something from them.

There probably is no right way but there's plenty of wrong ones

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By *herry...Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere


"As I look at it most people are brought up in away were it's common when you meet someone for the first time face to face you would greet them and ask how they were doing, so just seems normal nature to do it in a message. I actually find it rude when state in some bios not to do it, yes I understand its repetitive but let's face fact you will make your way to the profile check it out and if you like what you see you will reply anyway, the amount of 'interesting' messages I've did and still no reply not that I'm entitled to one but if you ask for effort then you should at least put the effort to say you're not interested. So I'd say it's a combo of how people would speak normally face to face and also realizing putting in the effort has no benefit either"

A valid point but I am far from rude, because I have my filters set pretty tight, I don't receive many messages daily, so I respond to probably 90% of them whether it be to continue chatting, or to give a respectful not interested response

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By *r-JayMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"As I look at it most people are brought up in away were it's common when you meet someone for the first time face to face you would greet them and ask how they were doing, so just seems normal nature to do it in a message. I actually find it rude when state in some bios not to do it, yes I understand its repetitive but let's face fact you will make your way to the profile check it out and if you like what you see you will reply anyway, the amount of 'interesting' messages I've did and still no reply not that I'm entitled to one but if you ask for effort then you should at least put the effort to say you're not interested. So I'd say it's a combo of how people would speak normally face to face and also realizing putting in the effort has no benefit either

A valid point but I am far from rude, because I have my filters set pretty tight, I don't receive many messages daily, so I respond to probably 90% of them whether it be to continue chatting, or to give a respectful not interested response "

The fact you respond to 90% shows you put the effort in back that's what I think is fair. Just imagine you're sitting in a bar and you watch some guy come up to a girl he introduces himself ask her how shes doing and she just blanks him turns away like he was never there, you would think I she is dead rude that's what I think people forget that it's people on the other side of the screen and that goes both ways the person writing the message and the one receiving it that you should put in some sort of effort either way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah s'grand

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