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Best Man Speech

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By *parkie2 OP   Man
over a year ago

Ratoath

I'm currently in the middle of writing a best man speech and I'm looking for some inspiration or help.

Throw some ideas at me please, have you a funny one liner or perhaps something longer?

Thanks in advance

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By *antis tMan
over a year ago

ballymahon

Ive done a couple. Just mentioned story from past a nice word to the bride then funny complement or silly quote joke or move thing to end it. As far as my advice goes. Basic but hope it helps.

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By *nowhowtotreatagirlMan
over a year ago

Limerick

Oh I’ve been there mate!!

Watch a few classic best man speeches on YouTube if it helps. Try not to tell too many stories that the lads will only find funny or you’ll lose the audience. I was best man to my best mate and had a chat with his dad who gave me a few golden nuggets from when he was younger that I never heard before - priceless!! Don’t overthink it and don’t make it too long either as there’ll be others saying a few words… be yourself & it’ll flow! Have you long before the big day? Recommend a trial run of a draft with another groomsman too

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By *oxic1998Woman
over a year ago

Belfast


"I'm currently in the middle of writing a best man speech and I'm looking for some inspiration or help.

Throw some ideas at me please, have you a funny one liner or perhaps something longer?

Thanks in advance"

Short and sweet.....dont make it too long.....coming from the catering side, speeches can ruin the dinner if they are too long and go on for a few hours

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By *parkie2 OP   Man
over a year ago

Ratoath

Lads thanks for your advice but I'm really looking for a killer one liner or something funny to throw in with what I have already.

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By *nowhowtotreatagirlMan
over a year ago

Limerick

Was groomsman at a wedding a few years back & the best man to finish the speech presented the groom with a ball & chain (bride a lovely girl but tough work too lol). Was absolutely hilarious!!

One liners… YouTube it, spoiled for choice!! Really depends on what the bridal party is like.. can they take a joke without taking it to heart? Everyone is different.. you can gauge that best yourself dude

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By *nowhowtotreatagirlMan
over a year ago

Limerick


"I'm currently in the middle of writing a best man speech and I'm looking for some inspiration or help.

Throw some ideas at me please, have you a funny one liner or perhaps something longer?

Thanks in advance

Short and sweet.....dont make it too long.....coming from the catering side, speeches can ruin the dinner if they are too long and go on for a few hours "

Totally agree!! Get the starters out & then lash into the speeches!! Bit of soakage lol

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By *atsshootsandleaves17Man
over a year ago

Town

Start with congratulations to the groom and his first wife (assuming she is 1st wife) I've heard if used to a good reception

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By *uriousVoyeurMan
over a year ago

Northside


"I'm currently in the middle of writing a best man speech and I'm looking for some inspiration or help.

Throw some ideas at me please, have you a funny one liner or perhaps something longer?

Thanks in advance"

One of the funniest things I seen during a best man's speech was when he said how popular the bride was but now that she's married she's out of bounds! He then said if any lads had keys to her house they should hand them back now. One by one nearly every lad there brought up a key that had been discretely given to them before dinner and put it on the table in front of the bride...last one was heading back to his seat and the best man asks is that everyone. Up stands the groom's father and puts a key down...the whole place roared laughing!!! It was the highlight of the speeches but it all depends on the sense of humour of the guests. Best of luck with it!!

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By *horty_80sWoman
over a year ago

askme

Guy I know at his brothers wedding

" I heard the best man speech is only supposed to last as long as the grooms love making, thank you" and he sat down

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By *nowhowtotreatagirlMan
over a year ago

Limerick


"I'm currently in the middle of writing a best man speech and I'm looking for some inspiration or help.

Throw some ideas at me please, have you a funny one liner or perhaps something longer?

Thanks in advance

One of the funniest things I seen during a best man's speech was when he said how popular the bride was but now that she's married she's out of bounds! He then said if any lads had keys to her house they should hand them back now. One by one nearly every lad there brought up a key that had been discretely given to them before dinner and put it on the table in front of the bride...last one was heading back to his seat and the best man asks is that everyone. Up stands the groom's father and puts a key down...the whole place roared laughing!!! It was the highlight of the speeches but it all depends on the sense of humour of the guests. Best of luck with it!! "

That’s excellent!!! Definitely going to use that next year!! Brilliant hahaha

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By *uriousVoyeurMan
over a year ago

Northside


"I'm currently in the middle of writing a best man speech and I'm looking for some inspiration or help.

Throw some ideas at me please, have you a funny one liner or perhaps something longer?

Thanks in advance

One of the funniest things I seen during a best man's speech was when he said how popular the bride was but now that she's married she's out of bounds! He then said if any lads had keys to her house they should hand them back now. One by one nearly every lad there brought up a key that had been discretely given to them before dinner and put it on the table in front of the bride...last one was heading back to his seat and the best man asks is that everyone. Up stands the groom's father and puts a key down...the whole place roared laughing!!! It was the highlight of the speeches but it all depends on the sense of humour of the guests. Best of luck with it!!

That’s excellent!!! Definitely going to use that next year!! Brilliant hahaha "

I swear,it was so funny!! Even more so as the groom's father was very shy and quiet!!!

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By *uriousVoyeurMan
over a year ago

Northside

[Removed by poster at 15/04/22 00:14:31]

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By *asual777Man
over a year ago

i travel all over

To the bride and groom : I love you both, and I really hope you'll feel the same about me after you hear the “speech."

I hope everyone is having a great time and enjoying the free Prosecco as much as I am

I have known the groom for x years and Since we first met, I have seen his transformation from an awkward youth to a slightly less awkward adult

Looking around the room today it’s nice to see so many of the bride and groom’s family, friends, and colleagues, as well those other people both sets of parents insisted had to be invited.

I want to reassure the bride that the stag do was a very sedate occasion and we were staggered at how beautiful the local churches were

I asked the stag do attendees many of whom know the groom for many years for some help with the speech content . I can’t tell you what they said but perhaps you can ask The groom later about (reference to incident a and incident b)

Oddly enough we do have a message from his former employer

‘Best of luck tonight to the bride. We tried him in many positions And he was useless in all of them ‘

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By *ed just RedWoman
over a year ago

Dublin City


"Lads thanks for your advice but I'm really looking for a killer one liner or something funny to throw in with what I have already. "

Being asked to be best man is like being asked to sleep with the queen. You’re really honoured but you really don’t want to!!!

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By *ed just RedWoman
over a year ago

Dublin City


"I'm currently in the middle of writing a best man speech and I'm looking for some inspiration or help.

Throw some ideas at me please, have you a funny one liner or perhaps something longer?

Thanks in advance

One of the funniest things I seen during a best man's speech was when he said how popular the bride was but now that she's married she's out of bounds! He then said if any lads had keys to her house they should hand them back now. One by one nearly every lad there brought up a key that had been discretely given to them before dinner and put it on the table in front of the bride...last one was heading back to his seat and the best man asks is that everyone. Up stands the groom's father and puts a key down...the whole place roared laughing!!! It was the highlight of the speeches but it all depends on the sense of humour of the guests. Best of luck with it!! "

OMG!!! Freaking epic!!!

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

Just be yourself. Don't try and be Mr Comedy if that isn't you. It will come across as weird and unfunny. Keep it short. Be kind to the bridesmaids. Mostly keep it short.

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By *uriousVoyeurMan
over a year ago

Northside


"Lads thanks for your advice but I'm really looking for a killer one liner or something funny to throw in with what I have already.

Being asked to be best man is like being asked to sleep with the queen. You’re really honoured but you really don’t want to!!! "

I'd be best man in a heartbeat as opposed to sleeping with the Queen...that's why my age range here is capped at 60!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My advise....

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail. It's not an easy thing to be in front of all those ppl looking up at you expecting to be entertained by you. You don't have to be Chris Rock or Jim Carey but your delivery is key. Know what you want to say and use cards with bullet points and you shouldn't get lost. Take you time with it and enjoy the experience yourself and don't bang on too long. If you've got hecklers that your concerned about put the spotlight on them early on and they might pipe down a bit for fear of being the ones on show .

Best of luck with it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Lads thanks for your advice but I'm really looking for a killer one liner or something funny to throw in with what I have already. "

"I had some really good lines but the groom snorted them all"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are some great one liners, but just remember to be nice too as the bride will be listening critically to every word.

(Speaking from multiple experiences).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just be yourself. Don't try and be Mr Comedy if that isn't you. It will come across as weird and unfunny. Keep it short. Be kind to the bridesmaids. Mostly keep it short."

...this is your stage. You will rarely get an opportunity to repeat this experience. So make the most of it. Ramble on for as long as you can. 30 to 45 minutes is a suitable time.

If you keep it monotone you might even put the kids and d*unks to sleep.

Any other advice required?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some good advice here....I have done this and its nerve wracking. As others have said you are not expected to be some master comedian. There is alot to be said for being sincere and genuine. Unless you are unreal at public speaking/riding by the seat of your pants...thoroughly prepare.

Key tips I would share:

- Know your audience....tales of the Amsterdam titty bar probably won't go down well

- Have a beginning, middle and end....beginning and end can take 5 mins off it alone...complimenting how well the bride looks, the wonderful hospitality etc etc

- A couple of anecdotes about how you know the Groom, why they are so good for each other etc to fill out the middle section

- Wrap it up with a toast, all the best for the future yadda yadda

Lastly if people attending are sound they will want to see you win. No (reasonable) person wants to see you fall on your face!

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By *nightonly321Couple
over a year ago

london

[Removed by poster at 15/04/22 16:22:31]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's great seeing them together. The brides legs that is" - Bob Mortimer's best man speech opener

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By *ell 192Man
over a year ago

darlington

I thought to start writing this Speech I need to know what the definition of marriage is so I looked it up in the dictionary. It said marriage is not a word it’s a sentence.

Good luck, enjoy it

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

It's all about communication.

When they first met the groom did all the talking as he wooed her.

As soon as they were engaged the bride did all the talking making arrangements for the big day.

Today on their wedding day they are both hoarse from talking to everyone.

Next week when they get back from the honeymoon and neither of them are talking, the neighbours will all be talking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At my wedding the best man said in his speech...marriage is like a three ring circus...engagement ring...wedding ring...suffering...

He was totally correct!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some great ideas here! Will defo have to steal some for my best man speech later this year.

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By *OCONO5Couple
over a year ago

Sensual Center


"I'm currently in the middle of writing a best man speech and I'm looking for some inspiration or help.

Throw some ideas at me please, have you a funny one liner or perhaps something longer?

Thanks in advance

One of the funniest things I seen during a best man's speech was when he said how popular the bride was but now that she's married she's out of bounds! He then said if any lads had keys to her house they should hand them back now. One by one nearly every lad there brought up a key that had been discretely given to them before dinner and put it on the table in front of the bride...last one was heading back to his seat and the best man asks is that everyone. Up stands the groom's father and puts a key down...the whole place roared laughing!!! It was the highlight of the speeches but it all depends on the sense of humour of the guests. Best of luck with it!!

OMG!!! Freaking epic!!! "

Brilliant

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By *xplicitMan
over a year ago

donegal

Don’t worry about it, you’re guaranteed to be told it was the best ‘best man’ speech they ever heard anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Firstly I’d like to say I’m very nervous about making this speech. In fact this must be the third time today that I’ve stood up from a warm seat with pieces of paper in my hand.

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