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By *ust4funcouple OP   Couple
over a year ago

Moira

OK heard this yesterday and spat out coffee. What's the difference between a joke and 3 cocks.. Your wife can't take a joke.. Ahaha

Please share skme more i can keep the lads in work happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A ventriloquist from Cork visiting Kerry walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog.

He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Kerryman... 'Whats the craic, mind if I have a chat with your dog?'

Kerryman: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Langer.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going?'

Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'

...Kerryman: (look of extreme shock!!!)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this Kerryman your owner?' (pointing at the Kerryman)

Dog: 'Tis'

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

Dog: 'Yeah, really well. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the beach once

a week to play.'

Kerryman: (look of utter disbelief)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'

Kerryman: 'Ehh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'

Horse: 'Cool'

Kerryman: (absolutely dumbfounded)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the Kerryman)

Horse: 'Tis'

Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?

Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down and keeps me

in the shed to protect me from the weather.'

Kerryman: (total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'

Kerryman: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a fucking liar...'

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down


"A ventriloquist from Cork visiting Kerry walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog.

He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Kerryman... 'Whats the craic, mind if I have a chat with your dog?'

Kerryman: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Langer.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going?'

Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'

...Kerryman: (look of extreme shock!!!)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this Kerryman your owner?' (pointing at the Kerryman)

Dog: 'Tis'

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

Dog: 'Yeah, really well. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the beach once

a week to play.'

Kerryman: (look of utter disbelief)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'

Kerryman: 'Ehh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'

Horse: 'Cool'

Kerryman: (absolutely dumbfounded)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the Kerryman)

Horse: 'Tis'

Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?

Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down and keeps me

in the shed to protect me from the weather.'

Kerryman: (total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'

Kerryman: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a fucking liar...'"

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By *oo32Man
over a year ago

tipperary

I went to a medium once,she said there was a load of money coming my way...

I walked outta there happy...

Until I got hit by a securicor van

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By *oo32Man
over a year ago

tipperary

If your ever being ignored by staff in b&q or woodies...

Try starting a chainsaw...it works

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