FabSwingers.com forum: Confession.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi all. Just to let ye know I am going to confess to my wife later that I am bi sexual and sexually open minded. I'm sure lots of ye have had the same conversation be itt confessing or hearing it. I won't lie i am shitting it. Once this door opens ther is no going back. But saying that it could be te best thing for the two of us. I hope to god it goes well because I love her to bits. I think even the confession itself will help me immensely despite the out come. Wish me well and any words of advice I'll appreciate.

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By *affa31Woman
over a year ago

Galway

Good luck

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Best of luck with it

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By *indenMan
over a year ago

Naas which is South West of Dublin

Best of luck, it’s important to remember, for both of you, it doesn’t change who you are as a person.

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By *hris 1000200Man
over a year ago

kells

A very brave decision,,best of luck,,hope it goes the way you want

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best of luck. Work through what you're gonna say and try see as much from her point of view as much as yours.

Hope it goes well!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thing is I reckon she has a bi side too so if we could both lift up our veils so to speak imagine the weight that would be lifted off our shoulders

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By *ublinguy99Man
over a year ago

Dublin South

I think you should sleep on that and see how you feel tomorrow.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Best of luck. Work through what you're gonna say and try see as much from her point of view as much as yours.

Hope it goes well!!"
I know going through it I'm my head the past four days. Don't even know wher to start

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By *hilaboutMan
over a year ago

kilkenny

Best of look ..hope it goes ok .let us know the outcome

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think you should sleep on that and see how you feel tomorrow. "
it's happening this evening she knows I have something to talk to her about

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think you should sleep on that and see how you feel tomorrow. it's happening this evening she knows I have something to talk to her about "
if you don't hear from me you know how it xent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi all. Just to let ye know I am going to confess to my wife later that I am bi sexual and sexually open minded. I'm sure lots of ye have had the same conversation be itt confessing or hearing it. I won't lie i am shitting it. Once this door opens ther is no going back. But saying that it could be te best thing for the two of us. I hope to god it goes well because I love her to bits. I think even the confession itself will help me immensely despite the out come. Wish me well and any words of advice I'll appreciate.

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

You could use the 'Sandwich' approach ... start and finish with the compliments/reassurance and put the meaty stuff in the middle of the convo. Good luck

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Best of luck, I told my wife last year and so happy that I did. We weren't and still don't have sex simply because she feels she too old for it. So it came as a relief for her too because we have a great relationship and she doesn't feel like she is denying me pleasure anymore. We have boundaries and she doesn't want to know the details. It definitely improved our relationship but thread carefully. Remember not all women are the same. Hope it goes well for you, Sean "
yea I get that. There is other stuff at play aswell I've had a troubled past which never helped. We haven't had had sex in ages. I'm figuring out now it wasn't that I was gone off her it's just that I wasn't able to be open with her about sexual stuff. So I did what I've always and avoided it

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

Well done! Be true to yourself. Good luck

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By *r NovemberMan
over a year ago

Closer than you think

A truly courageous decision, good for you OP and I sincerely hope it goes they way you have planned in your head, in delivery and reception

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very brave and honest OP.

Sending you all the courage in the world xx

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By *man79Man
over a year ago

newry dundalk. warrenpoint

Better to be open and honest. Best of luck dude

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By *quinnMan
over a year ago

Limerick

Really good luck OP, as many have said, its a very brave decision and you are doing the right thing in the long run even if there is some immediate pain on both sides. Hope all goes well for you both.

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By *ed_AliceWoman
over a year ago

Belfast

Good luck to you OP. Being honest isn't always the easy option but it allows you to stop hiding who you are

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By *oft_sexy_sweetWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

Good luck OP, kudos for being open and honest and I hope it goes well!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good luck OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best of luck!

Being honest can sometimes be hard, but it will come as a relief. Just be reassuring.

Wish you two the best!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Be brilliant. Be funny.

Be adventurous. Be exciting.

Be confident. Be inquisitive.

Be warm. Be inviting.

Be happy. Be grateful.

Be willing. Be brave.

Be bold. Be inspiring.

Be remarkable, but behave.

Be nice and be giving.

Be sensitive. Be caring.

Be proud and be honourable.

Be open. Be sharing.

Be smart and be curious.

Be trustworthy. Be cool.

Be wise, be ambitious

And be nobody’s fool.

Be calm, be determined

Be eloquent. Be measured.

Be knowledgeable. Be humble.

Be gracious. Be pleasured.

Be marvellous. Be accepting.

Be empathetic. Be true.

Be awesome. Be you."

- MS Moem

Best of luck, Ohpee!

Not everyone is born with a road map, knowing who they are, it can take people a lifetime to discover themselves. It takes strength to embrace it!

Wishing you both the best

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Well folks too early to say but not looking good at this stage. In fairness can be easy on herself either so probably take time to sink in and decide our future. Any way thnx for all the positive vibes

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By *ind PaddyMan
over a year ago

South County Dublin

"
best of luck, very brave decision, hope it works out for both of you

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I hope it all works out for you .

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By *nceuponatimecplCouple
over a year ago

The edge of town

"Well folks too early to say but not looking good at this stage. In fairness can be easy on herself either so probably take time to sink in and decide our future. Any way thnx for all the positive vibes

Don't worry if it doesn't look good at this stage, it's probably been a massive shock to her & will take time to sink in.

It's nearly 2 years

since I told my wife, admittedly it was a case of having to tell rather than making a conscious decision to do it which may have lessened the shock. I was also lucky that she is very open minded & curious about other cultures & lifestyles & while not necessarily getting actively involved she was more than willing to go to a social night to try to learn & understand. She ended up having a ball on the dance floor & can't wait for the social side of things to get going again.

It has made a massive difference to both of us, in a good way I think.

Have you told her about this site and that you have chatted, or maybe more to other guys?

If not then tell her now, or as soon as she asks. Now that you've started there's no point in holding back something that may come out later on. I don't mean for that to sound critical or condescending, just advice from someone who has been where you are now.

Above all else at the moment you're going to need patience, let her have space to think & try & keep normal life going, or as normal as you can

Hope it all works out as well for you as it did for us.

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Don't worry if it doesn't look good at this stage, it's probably been a massive shock to her & will take time to sink in.

It's nearly 2 years

It has made a massive difference to both of us, in a good way I think.

Have you told her about this site and that you have chatted, or maybe more to other guys?

Above all else at the moment you're going to need patience, let her have space to think & try & keep normal life going, or as normal as you can

Hope it all works out as well for you as it did for us.

Did it help that Gretal is also bi when you told her

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By *lameBoyMan
over a year ago

Enfield & Dublin

Honestly I wish you both the very best of luck going forward. You did a remarkably brave thing tonight by opening up and being honest with her. As was said already it must have been some shock to her but when the dust settles, I hope she can appreciate how strong you are. There might be a long road ahead of you both but set a target and aim for it. Don’t dwell on negatives. Onwards and upwards now. Congratulations.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That first conversation will be the hardest, and a shock too im sure. Well done.

Opening communication is the best thing, and making 'holding on to the good stuff' the priority between you.

xxR

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

Just give it time, that's what she needs right now. Have faith that you did the right thing in being true to yourself and opening up to her. Trust that all will be well

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By *indenMan
over a year ago

Naas which is South West of Dublin

A big step taken, give yourself a little credit for having the courage to take that step, and give both of you some time…..

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By *nceuponatimecplCouple
over a year ago

The edge of town

Did it help that Gretal is also bi when you told her "

That had nothing to do with. Her bi curiosity is not about her having sex with other women, more about her being open to exploring and not ruling anything in or out. When we set up this profile we did so with the attitude of taking one step at a time & seeing where it went.

Apologies OP for hi jacking your thread slightly. I hope you both can get through this and move on as Gretel & I did.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just keep talking and reassuring pal. Honesty and understanding is the way now.

All the best.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's the start of a process that can take a long time, and possibly a huge shock to her, anything that threatens the status quo will be unsettling. Give her time and keep talking, talking, talking, and reassuring her of your feelings for her.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Well folks thx for all the messages. Yea I can't imagine wha she must be going through. Hate seeing her upset and part of me is regretting it already.i was a bt naive to think this was going to sorted sooner than later.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've sent a wink out to everyone as an act of appreciation bit silly but hey

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By *hris 1000200Man
over a year ago

kells

Like all things in life,,time is a healer,,stay positive

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By *ed_AliceWoman
over a year ago

Belfast

Remember OP, you have been thinking about this & pondering the conversation(s) and potential outcomes for a very long time.

This is a lot of new & probably unexpected information for your wife. She needs time to get past her initial emotional reaction, time to process, time to consider, time to think about the future. She may want to do some of that processing without your input, she may have lots of questions.

An initial negative reaction doesn't necessarily mean it's going to end badly.

You've done the right thing being honest with yourself and her though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah this is so tricky in terms of expectations and each persons own views. I’ve written my wife cuckolding stories and she knows I’m into submission and everything but she see saws between accepting and wanting to try it and then shutting it down altogether. As a sub I just figured what’s the big deal she’d love to meet another guy and have that freedom but it’s not working out like that. At the end of the day if you both love each other things will work out. You might just have to accept that she doesn’t want certain things like I have to accept my wife doesn’t. It’s a little frustrating as sometimes she will indicate she does want them. Anyway I don’t want this to come across as all about me. Hopefully all works out. You could say you don’t want to meet men etc and would like to start with role play and strap on etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Remember OP, you have been thinking about this & pondering the conversation(s) and potential outcomes for a very long time.

An initial negative reaction doesn't necessarily mean it's going to end badly.

You've done the right thing being honest with yourself and her though. "

This is a very good post. I’ve been in this position. Years of having thought and tried things and then just expecting my wife to be at the same speed as me once I started to tell her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Awww Philip Schofield left

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hope he's ok

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"Awww Philip Schofield left

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hope he's ok "

Hope his wife is ok

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hope he's ok

Hope his wife is ok"

That's true, hope both are...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Really do hope things work out for both of them. I really do.

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