FabSwingers.com forum: Erections!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What's the best way to sort out an unscheduled boner?!

Discuss.....

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By *s LollyWoman
over a year ago

The pub then supermacs ...

Like if you get one on the bus or at the fruit and veg counter in Dunnes Stores

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By *rmrs1234Couple
over a year ago

Waterford

Stick it in cold water. Ice bucket challenge will sort that right out. Or possibly a photo of me first thing in the morning. It aint pretty

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"What's the best way to sort out an unscheduled boner?!

Discuss..... "

Do you schedule your boners

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Like when I get one on the bus or at the fruit and veg counter in Dunnes Stores

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What's the best way to sort out an unscheduled boner?!

Discuss.....

Do you schedule your boners "

Every 15 minutes

All day

Every day

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By *eralt80Man
over a year ago

cork

"Like if you get one on the bus or at the fruit and veg counter in Dunnes Stores

A handy extra book for the shopping bags

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Warm apple pie

. Job done

Works every time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Strap it under belt !!!

Works best for me to the right hand side ????

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Just hope the butcher's dog isn't around

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By *ub23Man
over a year ago

wandering

If sitting down I try to put it between my legs so the bulge isn’t noticeable and hope it passes

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By *eaAndBenCouple
over a year ago

Dublin

Are unscheduled boners a frequent thing? Or are they rare? And what would trigger one (assuming that at some point a bouncy bus ride loses its charm!).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can happen nearly anywhere... best case is hick it up under the waste of the trousers n hope to god one one notices...

Tho fell asleep on on the bus n did wake to a pull on package...

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By *ohng69Man
over a year ago

athenry

Stand up and feel proud.....oh you're already standing...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are unscheduled boners a frequent thing? Or are they rare? And what would trigger one (assuming that at some point a bouncy bus ride loses its charm!)."

A bouncy bus is never about charm ... hence it being unscheduled

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By *eaAndBenCouple
over a year ago

Dublin

A bouncy bus is never about charm ... hence it being unscheduled

So much for my attempt at levity

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They can happen anytime any where

I move it and took it into the top of the bottoms I am wearing so it's up near the belly button. Easy to hide then ??

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I just tuck it into my sock.

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By *eanbelfastMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Always remember an very old and well spoken consultant doing his rounds with with the Juniors Doctors and with one of the patients a young nurse was changing a dressing and the patient had an erection. The consultant said “young lady hit that with a spoon” she didn’t know what to do so he lifted a patella hammer and hit said erection a tap which did the trick. Not sure if it was the tap or the embarrassment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Slap of a cold spoon.. That'll put him back in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They can happen anytime any where

I move it and took it into the top of the bottoms I am wearing so it's up near the belly button. Easy to hide then ??"

That’s really uncomfortable for me given the shape of my erection

For upward curvers I presume it’s a great little neat trick tho

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By *ay_Gatsby_D4Man
over a year ago

City Centre, Dublin

A few Hail Marys and a Glory Be usually does the trick

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"I just tuck it into my sock. "

And goose step around the place I presume

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I call it "Winding the clock".

Start by tucking in your shirt, and when you get to the front, inconspicuously slip your hand down.

With a swift clockwise rotation you can angle it straight upwards under your belt, tucked away safe and sound.

The inconspicuous face scratch + finger sniff afterwards is optional.

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By *Belfast_FellaMan
over a year ago

belfast

In theory - a welcoming mouth or pussy.

In reality - a hand shandy.

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By *entleman PoliteMan
over a year ago

Mars

It's happening so often lately, I don't even try to hide it anymore.

I am just trying to wear baggy trousers.. ahah.

Avoid rugby shorts, it could find its way out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I call it "Winding the clock".

Start by tucking in your shirt, and when you get to the front, inconspicuously slip your hand down.

With a swift clockwise rotation you can angle it straight upwards under your belt, tucked away safe and sound.

The inconspicuous face scratch + finger sniff afterwards is optional."

Must keep an eye out for this

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"I call it "Winding the clock".

Start by tucking in your shirt, and when you get to the front, inconspicuously slip your hand down.

With a swift clockwise rotation you can angle it straight upwards under your belt, tucked away safe and sound.

The inconspicuous face scratch + finger sniff afterwards is optional.

Must keep an eye out for this "

Here's the german football manager doing it

https://youtu.be/j7USaBkHt8o

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I call it "Winding the clock".

Start by tucking in your shirt, and when you get to the front, inconspicuously slip your hand down.

With a swift clockwise rotation you can angle it straight upwards under your belt, tucked away safe and sound.

The inconspicuous face scratch + finger sniff afterwards is optional.

Must keep an eye out for this

Here's the german football manager doing it

https://youtu.be/j7USaBkHt8o"

Omg

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By *s LollyWoman
over a year ago

The pub then supermacs ...

Good aul Jochaim Low

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's the best way to sort out an unscheduled boner?!

Discuss..... "

Turn and find the nearest wall. Get up close to it. Nose touching distance. Comment out loud about the quality of the plaster or paint finish as you nod your head and tap your chin knowingly.

Keep the conversation going as you walk crab like sideways to the nearest door. Hand in pocket taking care of the " Get the Cock to 12 O'clock " manoeuvre...

Requires a degree of performance acting and soft hands abailty. A cross between Marcel Marceau and a watch maker..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I call it "Winding the clock".

Start by tucking in your shirt, and when you get to the front, inconspicuously slip your hand down.

With a swift clockwise rotation you can angle it straight upwards under your belt, tucked away safe and sound.

The inconspicuous face scratch + finger sniff afterwards is optional."

I see we have the same erection dealing strategy, Straight sharking that bitch.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I call it "Winding the clock".

Start by tucking in your shirt, and when you get to the front, inconspicuously slip your hand down.

With a swift clockwise rotation you can angle it straight upwards under your belt, tucked away safe and sound.

The inconspicuous face scratch + finger sniff afterwards is optional."

Haha thats exactly the trick..

You are kinda letting out some of the 'man secrets' though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At my Dunnes store the ladies underwear is on the way to the fruit and veg aisle. Does lead to the odd unsceuedled erection mixed in with the sexy ladies doing their shopping bending down to the bottom shelves. Pure torture

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's tough being a man in this day and age

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's the best way to sort out an unscheduled boner?!

Discuss.....

Do you schedule your boners "

BogM with comment of the day. Wheres the crown emoji XD

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I call it "Winding the clock".

Start by tucking in your shirt, and when you get to the front, inconspicuously slip your hand down.

With a swift clockwise rotation you can angle it straight upwards under your belt, tucked away safe and sound.

The inconspicuous face scratch + finger sniff afterwards is optional.

Must keep an eye out for this

Here's the german football manager doing it

https://youtu.be/j7USaBkHt8o"

Oh god haha. Save some for the rest of us why doesnt he

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Good aul Jochaim Low

Is that German for boner Lolly?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What's the best way to sort out an unscheduled boner?!

Discuss.....

Turn and find the nearest wall. Get up close to it. Nose touching distance. Comment out loud about the quality of the plaster or paint finish as you nod your head and tap your chin knowingly.

Keep the conversation going as you walk crab like sideways to the nearest door. Hand in pocket taking care of the " Get the Cock to 12 O'clock " manoeuvre...

Requires a degree of performance acting and soft hands abailty. A cross between Marcel Marceau and a watch maker..

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By *ukeM8519Man
over a year ago

Sligo

Nothing worse than a morning boner when your staying in a hotel room with your mates. Cheeky tuck in the boxers waist band usually does the trick.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My face hurts from laughing, keep the woesome stories coming guys.

This is what I fab for

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By *ub23Man
over a year ago

wandering

It’s a big struggle with skinny tracksuit bottoms have a bulge in them at the best of times

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

A few weeks ago I was parked waiting to go to a meeting and got messaging with a gorgeous woman on here

She told me something very filthy and very erotic

I was so hard I couldn't leave the car to walk into the meeting but a few minutes listening to Joe Duffy on liveline sorted that and I got into the meeting late

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A few weeks ago I was parked waiting to go to a meeting and got messaging with a gorgeous woman on here

She told me something very filthy and very erotic

I was so hard I couldn't leave the car to walk into the meeting but a few minutes listening to Joe Duffy on liveline sorted that and I got into the meeting late

"Ahh here Joe, they have there willy's hanging out on all their photographs. It's like something from a porno Joe."

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"A few weeks ago I was parked waiting to go to a meeting and got messaging with a gorgeous woman on here

She told me something very filthy and very erotic

I was so hard I couldn't leave the car to walk into the meeting but a few minutes listening to Joe Duffy on liveline sorted that and I got into the meeting late

"Ahh here Joe, they have there willy's hanging out on all their photographs. It's like something from a porno Joe.""

Good afternoon to you....sure sure..go on...wash your hands

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Good aul Jochaim Low

Is that German for boner Lolly? "

Jock Aim Low. That’s what I do anyway. 6 o clock is my preferred resting boner position

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/03/21 19:42:08]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Good aul Jochaim Low

Is that German for boner Lolly?

Jock Aim Low. That’s what I do anyway. 6 o clock is my preferred resting boner position

You're Gone Clop

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By *ka ..Agent k ..Man
over a year ago

depends who it belongs to!.

Cud very well be a lady boner..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Good aul Jochaim Low

Is that German for boner Lolly?

Jock Aim Low. That’s what I do anyway. 6 o clock is my preferred resting boner position

You're Gone Clop

Klopp for 6 in a row is it?

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By *eaAndBenCouple
over a year ago

Dublin

Here's the german football manager doing it

https://youtu.be/j7USaBkHt8o"

Oh God, where’s the vomit emoji???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just think of "Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Dominion machines rigged my erection

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So we are in agreement, the men have decided. Sharking it, is the new gold standard for arresting and erection and providing

camouflage. Now we must solve the next male problem like a hive mind.

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"Just think of "Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day""

That'd get me hard alright

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just think of "Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day"

That'd get me hard alright

You're a sick man BP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's the best way to sort out an unscheduled boner?!

Discuss..... "

Stick on a Liverpool home game?

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By *erry bull1Man
over a year ago

doncaster

Think of dianne Abbott

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By *elfastDMan
over a year ago

belfast

"I call it "Winding the clock".

Start by tucking in your shirt, and when you get to the front, inconspicuously slip your hand down.

With a swift clockwise rotation you can angle it straight upwards under your belt, tucked away safe and sound.

The inconspicuous face scratch + finger sniff afterwards is optional.

I see we have the same erection dealing strategy, Straight sharking that bitch."

That’s fine until it starts to fade and slips out below the waistband to pop out and show your semi sticking straight out

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By *rnoldZiffelMan
over a year ago

Leinster

Hah I love it, comment of the day.

I'm waiting to see when that blonde (the d*unk one who testified for Giuliani about the 'rigged' voting machines to that Republican committee) turns up in porn.

"The Dominion machines rigged my erection "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What's the best way to sort out an unscheduled boner?!

Discuss.....

Stick on a Liverpool home game?"

No use, the trendy new Nike gear is soooooo goddam hot

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By *ipmannMan
over a year ago

Cahir

A tap of a cold silver tea spoon..

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By *antra MassageMan
over a year ago

South Side.

I still get a hard on on a bus. Its the vibration, I think, or sitting still for so long. He slowly begins to creep down the left leg of my trousers(I hang to the left).. When I stand up, I'm embarrassed ..is everybody staring? Why should I be embarrassed anyway, its my pride and joy. So, i look at my reflection shop windows.. Yep.. Hes visible.. He creeps down a bit further, dry foreskin retracts.. Now its sore.. So gets harder.. Walking through Dunnes lingerie aisle, should I try to rearrange him.. Shift him around towards my belly button.. He might pop out!!. They have cameras all over the shop..

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"I still get a hard on on a bus. Its the vibration, I think, or sitting still for so long. He slowly begins to creep down the left leg of my trousers(I hang to the left).. When I stand up, I'm embarrassed ..is everybody staring? Why should I be embarrassed anyway, its my pride and joy. So, i look at my reflection shop windows.. Yep.. Hes visible.. He creeps down a bit further, dry foreskin retracts.. Now its sore.. So gets harder.. Walking through Dunnes lingerie aisle, should I try to rearrange him.. Shift him around towards my belly button.. He might pop out!!. They have cameras all over the shop.. "

Especially if it's the largest lingerie dept in Ireland ...Fr Ted quote for every occasion incl erections

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bic pen

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are unscheduled boners a frequent thing? Or are they rare? And what would trigger one (assuming that at some point a bouncy bus ride loses its charm!)."
dancing at a wedding with a mates mrs. can lead to a stiff moment..!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think about Arlene Foster or Lew Dawson

It's nothing political they just have boner killing looks

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