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Open marriage

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hi all quick question . I'm very very tempted of asking my wife what she would think about an open marriage as she seem to have gone off sex completely generally only wants it every 3-4 months and I'm always up for it. Has anyone any experience of asking this question and how did it turn out etc??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you let the bread go stale it won't be eaten

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Oh I love eating she's never in the mood for that too lol

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By *s LollyWoman
over a year ago

The pub then supermacs ...


"If you let the bread go stale it won't be eaten "

Hahaha never heard that before

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you let the bread go stale it won't be eaten

Hahaha never heard that before "

Just came to me

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By *ueenbeetipp43Woman
over a year ago

my own world


"Hi all quick question . I'm very very tempted of asking my wife what she would think about an open marriage as she seem to have gone off sex completely generally only wants it every 3-4 months and I'm always up for it. Has anyone any experience of asking this question and how did it turn out etc??"

Maybe have a discussion with your wife about why she's not in the mood instead of being so quick as to open your marriage to other people, especially if she's not a swinger. It could be something you're doing or not doing and it can be fixed...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hi all quick question . I'm very very tempted of asking my wife what she would think about an open marriage as she seem to have gone off sex completely generally only wants it every 3-4 months and I'm always up for it. Has anyone any experience of asking this question and how did it turn out etc??

Maybe have a discussion with your wife about why she's not in the mood instead of being so quick as to open your marriage to other people, especially if she's not a swinger. It could be something you're doing or not doing and it can be fixed... "
Hi , we've spoken about it loads and she says she is always too tired which dampens her mood

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

And before everyone says we'll try to do more around the house etc, I do all the cleaning, lunches ,buy flowers, get kids ready and dropped picked up from school etc, I'm not lazy i pull my weight and constantly pulling myself lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi all quick question . I'm very very tempted of asking my wife what she would think about an open marriage as she seem to have gone off sex completely generally only wants it every 3-4 months and I'm always up for it. Has anyone any experience of asking this question and how did it turn out etc??

Maybe have a discussion with your wife about why she's not in the mood instead of being so quick as to open your marriage to other people, especially if she's not a swinger. It could be something you're doing or not doing and it can be fixed... Hi , we've spoken about it loads and she says she is always too tired which dampens her mood"

And maybe there's a health reason she's tired all the time. It's a hard one to call. The sound of an open marriage may sound appealing but what happens when feelings get involved.

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick


"Hi all quick question . I'm very very tempted of asking my wife what she would think about an open marriage as she seem to have gone off sex completely generally only wants it every 3-4 months and I'm always up for it. Has anyone any experience of asking this question and how did it turn out etc??

Maybe have a discussion with your wife about why she's not in the mood instead of being so quick as to open your marriage to other people, especially if she's not a swinger. It could be something you're doing or not doing and it can be fixed... Hi , we've spoken about it loads and she says she is always too tired which dampens her mood"

Sorry Op but it appears to me that there is much more going on than her tiredness. Maybe a more thorough conversation is required

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hi all quick question . I'm very very tempted of asking my wife what she would think about an open marriage as she seem to have gone off sex completely generally only wants it every 3-4 months and I'm always up for it. Has anyone any experience of asking this question and how did it turn out etc??

Maybe have a discussion with your wife about why she's not in the mood instead of being so quick as to open your marriage to other people, especially if she's not a swinger. It could be something you're doing or not doing and it can be fixed... Hi , we've spoken about it loads and she says she is always too tired which dampens her mood

And maybe there's a health reason she's tired all the time. It's a hard one to call. The sound of an open marriage may sound appealing but what happens when feelings get involved. "

Exactly that's my fear, you've hit the nail right on the head

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By *j47Man
over a year ago

limerick

If your doing ur best to alleviate the other halfs load as in house work and the like maybe a full medical check up is required to see if there something else coming into play here.

As you have said u have had some deep chats around sex maybe joining here together as a cpl to see others and how they have spiced up the bedroom joining in the cjat rpoms or even chatting to other cpls might open up a new leafe of life for ye

But first eliminate other reasons and talk talk talk

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Some good advice man thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe it's nothing to do with you , she might not feel sexy anymore it happens to the best of us. Try make her feel special and loved without the pressure of sex , build up her confidence slowly. You might bring up the open marriage and make her feel that you're gone off her. Fix what's broken don't break it more. A woman's excitement build's days before the bedroom , it's the little meaningful things you do throughout the week that get both you and her there.

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside

Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!"
??

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Maybe it's nothing to do with you , she might not feel sexy anymore it happens to the best of us. Try make her feel special and loved without the pressure of sex , build up her confidence slowly. You might bring up the open marriage and make her feel that you're gone off her. Fix what's broken don't break it more. A woman's excitement build's days before the bedroom , it's the little meaningful things you do throughout the week that get both you and her there. "

That's the thing I do everything during the week lol. Massages etc but really appreciate the Advice I will try again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You need to sort out what's going on in your relationship before considering opening it to outsiders. Does your wife know you are on here? Maybe it's time for an indepth conversation, not about sex, but about how your marriage got to where it is now, how you both feel about it, and where you want it to go. There are many, many reasons why women lose interest in sex with their partners.

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside


"Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!??"

It's too long to write. I'll do you!

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By *outhmaleMan
over a year ago

Dundalk

Hi read all this i say ask next time at doctors ask for a full medical check up and blood count if she no energy maybe low B12 and wait than try some new toys for you both

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hi read all this i say ask next time at doctors ask for a full medical check up and blood count if she no energy maybe low B12 and wait than try some new toys for you both "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

have had low b12 before, its very common with vegans vegetarians

yes communication is vital for a marriage especially an open marriage there's no way to avoid communication if you want to get out of this situation

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By *ueenbeetipp43Woman
over a year ago

my own world


"Hi all quick question . I'm very very tempted of asking my wife what she would think about an open marriage as she seem to have gone off sex completely generally only wants it every 3-4 months and I'm always up for it. Has anyone any experience of asking this question and how did it turn out etc??

Maybe have a discussion with your wife about why she's not in the mood instead of being so quick as to open your marriage to other people, especially if she's not a swinger. It could be something you're doing or not doing and it can be fixed... Hi , we've spoken about it loads and she says she is always too tired which dampens her mood"

If she's tired all of the time and you do just as much around the house as she does then maybe you should get to the bottom of that. Lots of things could be affecting her, depression, thyroid, menopause or a million other things or if you haven't told her about fab maybe her intuition is kicking in.

Try focus on your wife rather than your need to have sex.

I'm not judging BTW, just saying there a lot of medical reasons for her being this way and you could do more harm than good by bringing up an open marriage. My husband and I have a b/f and g/f but in order for us to do that we have to be 100% secure in our marriage and put each other first all of the time.

Best of luck with it.

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By *ukeM8519Man
over a year ago

South Dublin


"Hi all quick question . I'm very very tempted of asking my wife what she would think about an open marriage as she seem to have gone off sex completely generally only wants it every 3-4 months and I'm always up for it. Has anyone any experience of asking this question and how did it turn out etc??"

What’s the relationship like other than sex? Do ye snuggle up on the sofa watching tv, hold hands out for a walk? Be touchy with each other and have good vibes etc?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately some wemon are like that.if they don't want fun .you don't get any .try talk to her about your needs .if that don't work. Go on your only human play the field behind her back

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside


"Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!??

It's too long to write. I'll do you!"

Omg I've reread what I wrote OP

U obviously know by now I meant I'll dm you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!??

It's too long to write. I'll do you!

Omg I've reread what I wrote OP

U obviously know by now I meant I'll dm you! "

I think you’ve cleared up the suspense for every single fab reader now but fair play to you for so directly offering to open up his marriage! Kudos hahaha!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi all quick question . I'm very very tempted of asking my wife what she would think about an open marriage as she seem to have gone off sex completely generally only wants it every 3-4 months and I'm always up for it. Has anyone any experience of asking this question and how did it turn out etc??

Maybe have a discussion with your wife about why she's not in the mood instead of being so quick as to open your marriage to other people, especially if she's not a swinger. It could be something you're doing or not doing and it can be fixed... Hi , we've spoken about it loads and she says she is always too tired which dampens her mood"

Do you help her around the house. Make her feel wanted and not the act of sex. Do you surprise her with nice gestures. I know from me. When I dont want sex something deeper.is going on

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By *atts n titsCouple
over a year ago

everywhere

Maybe she's on fab and too tired for you

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By *j47Man
over a year ago

limerick


"Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!??

It's too long to write. I'll do you!

Omg I've reread what I wrote OP

U obviously know by now I meant I'll dm you! "

I was going to ask will u post the vid of u doing him

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside


"Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!??

It's too long to write. I'll do you!

Omg I've reread what I wrote OP

U obviously know by now I meant I'll dm you!

I think you’ve cleared up the suspense for every single fab reader now but fair play to you for so directly offering to open up his marriage! Kudos hahaha!! "

I know

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside


"Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!??

It's too long to write. I'll do you!

Omg I've reread what I wrote OP

U obviously know by now I meant I'll dm you!

I was going to ask will u post the vid of u doing him "

Feckin predictive texts!

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By *nicksjohnTV/TS
over a year ago

Sligo

Perhaps you should think about moving out, no point being with a woman if she is not doing her duty.

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By *ofusplusCouple
over a year ago

Limerick


"Perhaps you should think about moving out, no point being with a woman if she is not doing her duty. "

Uuummm.... maybe take the above 'advice' with a large pinch of salt ... I'm sure you will

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By *phrodite72Woman
over a year ago

dublin/galway


"Perhaps you should think about moving out, no point being with a woman if she is not doing her duty.

Uuummm.... maybe take the above 'advice' with a large pinch of salt ... I'm sure you will

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Perhaps you should think about moving out, no point being with a woman if she is not doing her duty. "

Hmmm duty?

Once, a very wise friend of mine said, "If not even his wife wants to have sex with him, he must be defective"

There can be excemptions though. Open communication is paramount in any relationship....

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By *dfabMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne

Are you also ready OP if she says yes to this and is then having more sex than you are?

Can happen.

It's a wide open door you're considering open, which both walk through.

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By *exydoctorsCouple
over a year ago

Galway/Clare

There's a reason somewhere that your wife and you aren't having sex. That needs to be fixed first.

You need to have amazing communication for an open marriage to work well. That needs to be fixed first.

An open marriage can create excitement but it's not a magic fix

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By *rmrspumpCouple
over a year ago

narnia

Can I ask are you happy for her to meet other men alone if she wishes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi OP like said already it's seems to be no more going on, i got t it turned off sex in a long term relationship due to loss/grief. It could be a mix of emotional, physical and psychological or a mix as they are obviously connected. Definitely talk more and maybe suggest some relationship counselling, if I were you don't bring up swinging just yet try solve the relationships break down first, good luck with it OP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Are you also ready OP if she says yes to this and is then having more sex than you are?

Can happen.

It's a wide open door you're considering open, which both walk through."

Lots of people don’t truly think about this and there’s ZERO going back. It’s the death of your relationship as you know it and hopefully the start of a new one which still involves you both

But if you only go into it for what you can get, you could be sorely disappointed when she (your wife) gets offered (and takes) far more.

This is the reality of swinging that I feel you haven’t properly engaged with and you truly need to have a proper chat with her about where things are at before you even dream about mentioning swinging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Perhaps you should think about moving out, no point being with a woman if she is not doing her duty. "

And what are those duties. Clearly you know more then us normal folk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!"

You could suggest buy a sex swing,talk to her,tell her how hot it would be to try it,give her time to digest it, as above have said,if she's game then great,not sure if mentioning a swing site,if no interest shown to spicing things will help.(Ms snoop)

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By *ancyachatnowMan
over a year ago

Naas

Jeez the poor chap must have thought as his Christmas has come at once

Shame on you

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By *aid backMan
over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

So let's say she agrees to an open marriage and starts to sleep with 4 or 5 guys a month (easily done on here) and you meet maybe 1 or 2 every 3 months ( you've got a lot more competition don't forget) would you be happy with that ?

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By *aid backMan
over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

The other thing I can't get my head around is if sex is so important to people and they are in sexless marriages why don't they just leave rather than living a lie ?

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By *etmebeurfantasyWoman
over a year ago

My town

Asking questions to your wife you gotta be prepared for any answer she could have a health issue she could be going through the menopause some women loose the interest in sex while going through the menopause. Or she could say that she has no interests in sex with you but could with others these are just a few suggestions of what she might say

Your best to ask her yourself

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By *aid backMan
over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out


"Asking questions to your wife you gotta be prepared for any answer she could have a health issue she could be going through the menopause some women loose the interest in sex while going through the menopause. Or she could say that she has no interests in sex with you but could with others these are just a few suggestions of what she might say

Your best to ask her yourself "

Imagine the dent to the ego

Him: let's have an open marriage as my sex drive is higher than yours.

Her: ok perfect I'd rather fuck anyone else than you.

Ouch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe she already is fucking some one else . Just saying

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By *233Man
over a year ago

Belfast

Talking with her is the best way me and my Ex wife were similar only it was me yes me

I lost total sex drive in the marriage, putting it down to every day life kids family work and normal life worries, what makes it worse the more she wanted to have fun the more under pressure it made it, IN A WAY it laid to are divorce, all im saying is talk with her before going looking it definitely won't help playing away

P.s mojo is back and that's why I found fab and for us

Simply wasn't to be !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nothing fixes a broken libido like a good divorce

Becareful what you wish for OP. I think you are looking at an open marriage from your side..you can meet without feeling guilty and sneaking around. But bare in mind, she can then as well.

Who knows, she might be already

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!??

It's too long to write. I'll do you!

Omg I've reread what I wrote OP

U obviously know by now I meant I'll dm you! "

I'll do you in mate!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Nothing fixes a broken libido like a good divorce

"

so so true

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks for a your advice here everyone, had good talk over the weekend "planted the seed lol" but she says I do more than enough around the house , in relation to her feelings etc,. Just not in the mood as much as I am, will update if any changes,. I did mention to go to doc as she is alway tired thanks again all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From experience we can lack confidence. Feel unattractive frumpy. Gain weight and feel self conscious. Also atm stresses financially. Our brains always working overtime with kids. Home works. Planning tomorrows meals. And shopping lists lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"From experience we can lack confidence. Feel unattractive frumpy. Gain weight and feel self conscious. Also atm stresses financially. Our brains always working overtime with kids. Home works. Planning tomorrows meals. And shopping lists lol. "

Agreed. we can lose any sense of ourselves, particularly our sexual selves, in the daily drudge and drain of all the above.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Plant the swinging seed in her head...and let it grow for a bit!

Worked for me!??

It's too long to write. I'll do you!

Omg I've reread what I wrote OP

U obviously know by now I meant I'll dm you!

I was going to ask will u post the vid of u doing him

Feckin predictive texts! "

And here was I thinking wow what a lady for offering her services to do him

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By *m158Couple
over a year ago

Cork

Thankfully we spoke a lot together about swinging before we eventually took the plunge on holidays in Portugal a few years ago...we have an open relationship and swinging has really helped keep the spice between us

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