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By *og-Man OP   Man
over a year ago

somewhere

A Woman comes Home and tells her Husband:-

"Remember those Headaches I've been having all these years..??? Well, They're Gone."

"No More Headaches." The Husband asks. "Jeez. What happened"..???

His Wife replies. "The doctor referred me to a

Hipnotherapist

He told me to stand in front of a Mirror, stare at myself and repeat “I do not have a Headache; I do not have a Headache, I do not have a Headache”. It Worked..?!?! The Headaches Are All Gone Now"..

The Husband replies. "Well, that is Wonderful."

His Wife then says. "You know, you haven't been exactly a Ball of Fire in the Bedroom these last few years. Why don't you go see the Hipnotherapist and see if he can do anything for that"..??

The Husband agrees to try it.

Following his appointment, the Husband comes home, rips off his clothes, picks up his Wife and carries her into the Bedroom. He puts her on the bed and says. "Don't move, I'll be right back."

He goes into the Bathroom and comes back a few minutes later and Jumps into Bed with her and makes Mad, Passionate Love to his Wife like never before.

His wife says. "Boy, that was Wonderful."

The husband says. "Don't Move..! I'll Be Right Back"..

He goes back into the Bathroom, comes back and Round Two was even better than the First Time.

The Wife sits up and her Head is Spinning.

Her Husband again says. "Don't Move, I'll Be Right Back."

With that, he goes back in the Bathroom. This time, his Wife quietly follows him and there, in the Bathroom, she sees him standing at the Mirror and saying."

“She's Not My Wife.

She's Not My Wife.

She's Not My Wife.”

*

His Funeral Service will be held on Tuesday at 1pm..!

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

I enjoyed that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Brilliant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A Woman comes Home and tells her Husband:-

"Remember those Headaches I've been having all these years..??? Well, They're Gone."

"No More Headaches." The Husband asks. "Jeez. What happened"..???

His Wife replies. "The doctor referred me to a

Hipnotherapist

He told me to stand in front of a Mirror, stare at myself and repeat “I do not have a Headache; I do not have a Headache, I do not have a Headache”. It Worked..?!?! The Headaches Are All Gone Now"..

The Husband replies. "Well, that is Wonderful."

His Wife then says. "You know, you haven't been exactly a Ball of Fire in the Bedroom these last few years. Why don't you go see the Hipnotherapist and see if he can do anything for that"..??

The Husband agrees to try it.

Following his appointment, the Husband comes home, rips off his clothes, picks up his Wife and carries her into the Bedroom. He puts her on the bed and says. "Don't move, I'll be right back."

He goes into the Bathroom and comes back a few minutes later and Jumps into Bed with her and makes Mad, Passionate Love to his Wife like never before.

His wife says. "Boy, that was Wonderful."

The husband says. "Don't Move..! I'll Be Right Back"..

He goes back into the Bathroom, comes back and Round Two was even better than the First Time.

The Wife sits up and her Head is Spinning.

Her Husband again says. "Don't Move, I'll Be Right Back."

With that, he goes back in the Bathroom. This time, his Wife quietly follows him and there, in the Bathroom, she sees him standing at the Mirror and saying."

“She's Not My Wife.

She's Not My Wife.

She's Not My Wife.”

*

His Funeral Service will be held on Tuesday at 1pm..!"

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By *ewarkMarkMan
over a year ago

Waterford

Very good. One I can tell me dad!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

FAB meets are like farts....

If you have to force it...

......it’s probably going to be shit

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By *easingTimMan
over a year ago

Loughlinstown

What did Homer Simpson say

after he scored his son's teacher?

"Well now I know why they call you Miss Hoover!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

What did Homer Simpson say

after he scored his son's teacher?

"Well now I know why they call you Miss Hoover!" "

Lol. We all know Homer doesnt remember the names of teachers...

"Her name is Miss Krabapple?? I've been calling her Crandle!! Agh, I've been making an idiot out of myself.."

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By *og-Man OP   Man
over a year ago

somewhere

I had the best sex of my life last night with a blind women.

She said I had the biggest cock she'd ever gotten hold off

I said you're pulling my leg

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I had the best sex of my life last night with a blind women.

She said I had the biggest cock she'd ever gotten hold off

I said you're pulling my leg "

I had sex with a Mime last night. She did unspeakable things to me.

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By *og-Man OP   Man
over a year ago

somewhere


"I had the best sex of my life last night with a blind women.

She said I had the biggest cock she'd ever gotten hold off

I said you're pulling my leg

I had sex with a Mime last night. She did unspeakable things to me. "

Robbing that for my dad

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

Breaking news...

Mary Poppins has announced she's no longer going to give Bj's wearing lipstick....

Reason being the super colour ragile lipstick makes the dicks atrocious

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

Missed the f off fragile

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By *uriousVoyeurMan
over a year ago

Northside

John Wayne approached a hooker and asked (read it in a John Wayne accent) "Ma'am,how much would you charge me for my company!" She replied "$20". He then said "Company....Forwaaaaard!!!!"

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

Prefer longer version...

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

John Wayne rides his detachment of US cavalry into town..

As they reach the town saloon he raises his arm and shouts "woah"

Bringing the detachment to halt..

He gets off his horse and strides over (john Wayne style) towards the doors of the saloon where a saloon girl is standing..

Approaching her he asks "excuse me maam,but how much would you charge for the pleasure of my company"

Looking him up and down she replies in southern drawl "well sir I'd charge you 20$..."

Raising his arm john wayne goes "company woah".

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

John wayne leads a party of US marines on the beach under heavy japanese fire at Iwa Jiva...

He shouts the order "ok marines hit the beach"

They all drop to their knees and start slapping the beach going

"Naughty beach

Naughty beach

Naughty beach

Naughty beach"

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By *obshortMan
over a year ago

Cork

Very good. Lol

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

It's the way I tell them...! !!

Or to be precise the way I write them...! !!

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By *uriousVoyeurMan
over a year ago

Northside


"Prefer longer version...

"

I'm on a short break and type very slowly!!!

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

No worries

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By *og-Man OP   Man
over a year ago

somewhere

My mate has just seen the Chernobyl documentary. He actually grew up in Ukraine in the 1980's and was able to count at least 8 historical inaccuracies on one hand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My mate has just seen the Chernobyl documentary. He actually grew up in Ukraine in the 1980's and was able to count at least 8 historical inaccuracies on one hand."

Shiver me timbers

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