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What is the worst date you have ever been on?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Robbed from the lounge so what's your worst date been? ( Obviously not from fab)

Only been on probably 3 actual proper dates and worst one couldn't understand a word the guy said, he was from donegal and spoke way too fast.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Robbed!!! As in purse etc WTF!

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age

Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it )

Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives

We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart "

Memories

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By *unnitoesWoman
over a year ago

Belfast


"Robbed from the lounge so what's your worst date been? ( Obviously not from fab)

Only been on probably 3 actual proper dates and worst one couldn't understand a word the guy said, he was from donegal and spoke way too fast."

That just made me giggle!! I dunno what the Donegal accent is but it sounds funny

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age

Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it )

Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives

We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart "

Memories "

Ah bless

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By *unnitoesWoman
over a year ago

Belfast


"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age

Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it )

Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives

We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart "

Memories "

Noooooo lolol! She remembers ur inside smell

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Meet a girl before for a social drink. Standard enough, but the more the conversation went on the more and more if found out that she was dumb and as thick as the wall. It was hard to talk to her and try not correct her on just about everything she said..

But thankfully she gave grate head and loved to fuck ... we meet many times more

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age

Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it )

Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives

We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart "

Memories

Noooooo lolol! She remembers ur inside smell "

No thank God just a loud (really loud) one with no smell

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By *unnitoesWoman
over a year ago

Belfast


"Meet a girl before for a social drink. Standard enough, but the more the conversation went on the more and more if found out that she was dumb and as thick as the wall. It was hard to talk to her and try not correct her on just about everything she said..

But thankfully she gave grate head and loved to fuck ... we meet many times more "

Hopefully you meant 'great' head coz if you didn't you're shredded

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By *unnitoesWoman
over a year ago

Belfast


"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age

Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it )

Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives

We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart "

Memories

Noooooo lolol! She remembers ur inside smell

No thank God just a loud (really loud) one with no smell "

Yea yea #rosesfart

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah the auto correct does me no favours these days.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never been on a date in my life

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By *nd_then_sheWoman
over a year ago

cork

About 2 years back, set up by mutual friends. Met for food and then went for drinks after. All seemed fine, both on our best behaviour and somehow the conversation moved onto the female anatomy.

Guy 100% refused to believe the clitoris was real. I honest to christ waited a good 20mins for the punchline before realising he was serious. He felt it was some sort of scam by women so we could force poor unsuspecting men into sticking their head into our nether regions

He was shocked when I left without him and even more so when I refused a second date

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Its real ?

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By *nd_then_sheWoman
over a year ago

cork


"Its real ? "

Nah, between you and me it's all a big conspiracy

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"Its real ?

Nah, between you and me it's all a big conspiracy "

Thank God I knew those women were only tricking me ...

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By *nd_then_sheWoman
over a year ago

cork


"Its real ?

Nah, between you and me it's all a big conspiracy

Thank God I knew those women were only tricking me ..."

We have a secret group chat, afterwards we share stories and laugh and all the gullible and naive men. Need something to do after the kitchen's cleaned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age

Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it )

Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives

We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart "

Memories "

She must have been blown away on that date!

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age

Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it )

Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives

We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart "

Memories

She must have been blown away on that date! "

After the fart it was only ever going to be one of us to be honest

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"Its real ?

Nah, between you and me it's all a big conspiracy

Thank God I knew those women were only tricking me ...

We have a secret group chat, afterwards we share stories and laugh and all the gullible and naive men. Need something to do after the kitchen's cleaned "

Feck....lads we're in trouble

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I've only been on two dates.

First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined.

The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's pretty vanilla but mine was that she didn't do the "no I'll pay for myself" or "I'll get this" dance, when it came time to pay.

She kind of just stood to the side or looked off to the side and to the heavens saying nothing when money was asked for, or when it was time for paying.

Now money isn't an issue for myself regardless if I'm flush or broke, it's only money and I like to pay at least for the first two dates, it's not a macho thing (I'm FAR from macho! Haha)

I just like to kind of spoil the other person/be grateful that they came on a date with me kind of thing, as well I like to share and be generous. But that would be a max of the first 2 to 4 dates and after that do the sharing but still spoil on birthdays and spur of the moment occasions.

Anyways, them doing that just made me realise they would expect it ALL the time, so I didn't call her for a second date, ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've only been on two dates.

First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined.

The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er. "

That's one horrible first date, yikes!

The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down


"I've only been on two dates.

First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined.

The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er.

That's one horrible first date, yikes!

The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha"

Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore

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By *Belfast_FellaMan
over a year ago

belfast


"I've only been on two dates.

First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined.

The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er.

That's one horrible first date, yikes!

The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha

Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore "

Was he Ben Stiller?

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"I've only been on two dates.

First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined.

The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er.

That's one horrible first date, yikes!

The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha

Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore "

Every bloke is wincing here Bo ....you must of had a good look before his mammy took over

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once went on a date with guy who came and picked me up. We made our way to a restaurant and once we entered this older woman started waking frantically at us. He walked towards where she was sitting and says to her sorry mum bit this one kept me waiting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My worst date was only a potential one... Chatted to a woman on another site.. Arranged to meet and asked where would she like to go.. She suggested the Trident Hotel in Kinsale.. As there was a nice wedding fare on there...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

These are all brilliant, funny lunchtime reading

Haven’t been on many dates so no bad ones from me

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By *eaAndBenCouple
over a year ago

Dublin


"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore "

He actually showed you?!

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By *eaAndBenCouple
over a year ago

Dublin


"I've only been on two dates.

First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined.

The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er.

That's one horrible first date, yikes!

The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha"

How often does this happen lads?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore

He actually showed you?! "

It was probably some kind of sick fetish of his

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"I've only been on two dates.

First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined.

The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er.

That's one horrible first date, yikes!

The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha

How often does this happen lads?! "

Usually only once because you try never to make that mistake again in fairness

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down


"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore

He actually showed you?! "

Ye I went looking for him as he was gone ages he was in a cubicle in the mens room crying. To be fair it looked painful. He then had to give me his mum's number and I had to go to a pay phone (yes I'm that old it was before mobile phones) explain to his mum and get her to come an collect him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore

He actually showed you?!

Ye I went looking for him as he was gone ages he was in a cubicle in the mens room crying. To be fair it looked painful. He then had to give me his mum's number and I had to go to a pay phone (yes I'm that old it was before mobile phones) explain to his mum and get her to come an collect him. "

I'm skitting... I shouldn't... But I am

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore

He actually showed you?!

Ye I went looking for him as he was gone ages he was in a cubicle in the mens room crying. To be fair it looked painful. He then had to give me his mum's number and I had to go to a pay phone (yes I'm that old it was before mobile phones) explain to his mum and get her to come an collect him. "

There's a conversation you didnt think you'd be having at the start of the date

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By *eaAndBenCouple
over a year ago

Dublin


"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore

He actually showed you?!

Ye I went looking for him as he was gone ages he was in a cubicle in the mens room crying. To be fair it looked painful. He then had to give me his mum's number and I had to go to a pay phone (yes I'm that old it was before mobile phones) explain to his mum and get her to come an collect him. "

The poor lad (and his poor lad!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age

Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it )

Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives

We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart "

Memories "

oh god I’m laughing out very loudly. Sorry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've only been on two dates.

First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined.

The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er.

That's one horrible first date, yikes!

The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha

Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore

Was he Ben Stiller?"

Franck and Beans!

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By *oo32Man
over a year ago

tipperary

Ohhh jesus....I met a non irish national who claimed to be from one country but was from another one(right maybe I misunderstood).

Was single never married with no kids....

Divorced with a kid(no biggy for me)

Said she was working at one job...was doing something very different..

Conversation revolved around her...

She wanted to know how come I'd taken so long to ask her to meet,it had been about a week of texting,was extremely rude to the girl serving us..

Then wanted to know how much I made...

I made my excuses and left...but no before she said i could take her to the cinema and pay for it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Firstly he got so pissed he disappeared and gate crashed a funeral wake and then fell asleep on the table . I left him and got a taxi home .

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere


"Firstly he got so pissed he disappeared and gate crashed a funeral wake and then fell asleep on the table . I left him and got a taxi home . "

And what was the second date like

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By *uriousVoyeurMan
over a year ago

Northside


"I've only been on two dates.

First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined.

The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er.

That's one horrible first date, yikes!

The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha

How often does this happen lads?! "

You'd be surprised,but generally only happens each of us once

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was just out of a relationship and in truth was in no headspace to date but thought I’d give the then new-fangled tinder thing a go to distract myself.

Agreed to meet this guy but was in floods of tears hours before the date, I really should’ve cancelled.

It was apparent to me from the get-go that I wasn’t attracted to him but having been too long off the dating scene I had forgotten how to politely wind things up. He got shitfaced and regaled me with story after story about his favourite football club while I spent the date dreaming about getting a burger from Rick’s on my way home.

Finally it was home time and he bent down to move in for a hug/kiss but I recoiled and tensed up so when his arms slotted in under mine and he straightened up (he was a lot taller than me) he kinda picked me up like a forklift and.. shook me.

He asked how I was going to get home, I said I’d get a taxi and he pointed out that there was one free beside us but I just mumbled something like “not that one, thanks, okay byyyyeee” and pretty much ran off in the direction of Dame St for my much longed for burger.

I can’t claim to have been stellar company for him either in fairness but the forklift hug bit still makes me chuckle to myself.

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

a forklift hug....first time hearing that expression and its so self explanatory ....brilliant story

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Was just out of a relationship and in truth was in no headspace to date but thought I’d give the then new-fangled tinder thing a go to distract myself.

Agreed to meet this guy but was in floods of tears hours before the date, I really should’ve cancelled.

It was apparent to me from the get-go that I wasn’t attracted to him but having been too long off the dating scene I had forgotten how to politely wind things up. He got shitfaced and regaled me with story after story about his favourite football club while I spent the date dreaming about getting a burger from Rick’s on my way home.

Finally it was home time and he bent down to move in for a hug/kiss but I recoiled and tensed up so when his arms slotted in under mine and he straightened up (he was a lot taller than me) he kinda picked me up like a forklift and.. shook me.

He asked how I was going to get home, I said I’d get a taxi and he pointed out that there was one free beside us but I just mumbled something like “not that one, thanks, okay byyyyeee” and pretty much ran off in the direction of Dame St for my much longed for burger.

I can’t claim to have been stellar company for him either in fairness but the forklift hug bit still makes me chuckle to myself. "

Forklift hug brill

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"Was just out of a relationship and in truth was in no headspace to date but thought I’d give the then new-fangled tinder thing a go to distract myself.

Agreed to meet this guy but was in floods of tears hours before the date, I really should’ve cancelled.

It was apparent to me from the get-go that I wasn’t attracted to him but having been too long off the dating scene I had forgotten how to politely wind things up. He got shitfaced and regaled me with story after story about his favourite football club while I spent the date dreaming about getting a burger from Rick’s on my way home.

Finally it was home time and he bent down to move in for a hug/kiss but I recoiled and tensed up so when his arms slotted in under mine and he straightened up (he was a lot taller than me) he kinda picked me up like a forklift and.. shook me.

He asked how I was going to get home, I said I’d get a taxi and he pointed out that there was one free beside us but I just mumbled something like “not that one, thanks, okay byyyyeee” and pretty much ran off in the direction of Dame St for my much longed for burger.

I can’t claim to have been stellar company for him either in fairness but the forklift hug bit still makes me chuckle to myself. "

It was a two pronged approach.

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By *sLittleRedRidingHoodWoman
over a year ago

Magical Forrest

Date nr 1 was going great ... thought oh yes he is totally into me.... only for him to turn around and say nah he didn't feel anything...

Blind date set up by a female friend...guy was great ... till he told me my friend had told him i was on a swinger site... so could I give him a bj ... he also called me a fuck and go whore....

Dated guy for 6 weeks.... only for him to be a depressed alcoholic who turned verbally abusive over time....

Yeah I have no luck....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One of my first dates was when I was 17. Poor boy ended up in hospital after a hand job. He was very religious and never masturbated because he thought Jesus was watching him wank. He seemed to get a allergic reaction he broke into a rash with hives all over just after he came. He seemed to panic more as he thought it was God's way to tell him he was sinning from this. That was a awkward drive to the hospital with his Father questions about what he had being doing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds like he was Aimish

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sounds like he was Aimish "

Worse from Laois

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sounds like he was Aimish

Worse from Laois "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Meet a girl before for a social drink. Standard enough, but the more the conversation went on the more and more if found out that she was dumb and as thick as the wall. It was hard to talk to her and try not correct her on just about everything she said..

But thankfully she gave grate head and loved to fuck ... we meet many times more

Hopefully you meant 'great' head coz if you didn't you're shredded "

Ouch otherwise lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Meet a girl before for a social drink. Standard enough, but the more the conversation went on the more and more if found out that she was dumb and as thick as the wall. It was hard to talk to her and try not correct her on just about everything she said..

But thankfully she gave grate head and loved to fuck ... we meet many times more

Hopefully you meant 'great' head coz if you didn't you're shredded

Ouch otherwise lol"

My favourite quote if I don’t like it, I’d rather shave my head with a cheese grater

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I had a social with a guy from another site. Met him at a shopping centre and we had coffee. He was wearing a black and yellow hand knitted bumble bee jumper. He asked me back to his home to have tea and scones with his mum so I refused and left. He followed me round the shopping centre in the style of James Bond jumping in and out of shops at me. I finally got rid of him in Ann Summers where I sought refuge in a changing room! He text me later asking me to marry him! I refused.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ended up getting my nose reset on my first ever date with a girl I fancied in school since we were both young and ended up breaking my nose cause we both went in for a kiss but she went in wayyyyyy to fast so I spent the night in A&E

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By *lt_ieMan
over a year ago

kilkenny/Carlow

Many, many moons ago when I was a student, I discovered the way to a ladies heart (aka nickers) was through a well cooked meal and a naggin or two of vodka.

My speciality was chilli con carne, it had successfully won many a hungry students heart. This was the time when, god forbid, there were no fresh chilies on the island of Ireland; the main ingredient was ground chilies or chilli powder.

One particular term a date with Mary H happened to coincide with the arrival of Fresh chillis in the supermarkets. Pulling out all the stops I decided to use them in the chilli dish for Mary H.

All was going, well mince was browned, cumin, garlic, flour, tomatoes were in the pot. I chopped about 4 red chilies added them and set the dish simmering. With 40 minutes to kill Mary H decided the smell of the chilli cooking was enough to win her heart. One thing lead to another and we ended up in bed with me giving her a yoni masssge! That’s when all hell broke loose; in the HEAT (pardon the pun) of the moment I had forgotten to wash my hands and Mary H got up and started fanning her fanny as it was on fire! From that day fourth Mary H was known as Chilli lady!

For those of you who find this hard to appreciate, chop a chilli and rub your eye, lips, or if brave enough your front man/lady bits and you’ll understand!

Initially I though I had magic fingers

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By *j47Man
over a year ago

limerick


"Its real ?

Nah, between you and me it's all a big conspiracy

Thank God I knew those women were only tricking me ...

We have a secret group chat, afterwards we share stories and laugh and all the gullible and naive men. Need something to do after the kitchen's cleaned "

No wonder the dinners burnt going in to chat when u should be cooking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Was just out of a relationship and in truth was in no headspace to date but thought I’d give the then new-fangled tinder thing a go to distract myself.

Agreed to meet this guy but was in floods of tears hours before the date, I really should’ve cancelled.

It was apparent to me from the get-go that I wasn’t attracted to him but having been too long off the dating scene I had forgotten how to politely wind things up. He got shitfaced and regaled me with story after story about his favourite football club while I spent the date dreaming about getting a burger from Rick’s on my way home.

Finally it was home time and he bent down to move in for a hug/kiss but I recoiled and tensed up so when his arms slotted in under mine and he straightened up (he was a lot taller than me) he kinda picked me up like a forklift and.. shook me.

He asked how I was going to get home, I said I’d get a taxi and he pointed out that there was one free beside us but I just mumbled something like “not that one, thanks, okay byyyyeee” and pretty much ran off in the direction of Dame St for my much longed for burger.

I can’t claim to have been stellar company for him either in fairness but the forklift hug bit still makes me chuckle to myself. "

Did he go beep beep beep as he backed away?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I had a social with a guy from another site. Met him at a shopping centre and we had coffee. He was wearing a black and yellow hand knitted bumble bee jumper. He asked me back to his home to have tea and scones with his mum so I refused and left. He followed me round the shopping centre in the style of James Bond jumping in and out of shops at me. I finally got rid of him in Ann Summers where I sought refuge in a changing room! He text me later asking me to marry him! I refused. "

The thought of him trying to discretely follow you dressed like that made me laugh

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of


"I've never been on a date in my life"

Me neither, but reading this thread it sounds very funny and I love having a laugh...

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By *easingTimMan
over a year ago

Loughlinstown

Saw her pic

Went to meet her and pic vs reality was VERY DIFFERENT!

... greasy hair, scruffily dressed &

chewing gum She just grunted in casual conversation and at one stage decided to started kissing me...

...Her mouth tasted of 20 cigarettes and she

started biting my tongue... YES BITING!

Anyway after meeting Misery's Cathy Bates,

Timmy lived to see another day

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By *oxic1998Woman
over a year ago

Belfast


"I've never been on a date in my life"

This....even with the ex husband. We met at work and lived at work so didn't really date

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

if any of the ladies feel they're missing out Im available.

I don't promise on my profile to go down on you for hours or to fuck all night but my jesus can I bring you on a really good crap date

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"if any of the ladies feel they're missing out Im available.

I don't promise on my profile to go down on you for hours or to fuck all night but my jesus can I bring you on a really good crap date "

You’re too far away from me unfortunately. I love crap dates as it’s all I’m used to....

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