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"Robbed from the lounge so what's your worst date been? ( Obviously not from fab) Only been on probably 3 actual proper dates and worst one couldn't understand a word the guy said, he was from donegal and spoke way too fast." That just made me giggle!! I dunno what the Donegal accent is but it sounds funny | |||
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"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it ) Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart " Memories " Ah bless | |||
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"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it ) Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart " Memories " Noooooo lolol! She remembers ur inside smell | |||
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"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it ) Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart " Memories Noooooo lolol! She remembers ur inside smell " No thank God just a loud (really loud) one with no smell | |||
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"Meet a girl before for a social drink. Standard enough, but the more the conversation went on the more and more if found out that she was dumb and as thick as the wall. It was hard to talk to her and try not correct her on just about everything she said.. But thankfully she gave grate head and loved to fuck ... we meet many times more " Hopefully you meant 'great' head coz if you didn't you're shredded | |||
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"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it ) Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart " Memories Noooooo lolol! She remembers ur inside smell No thank God just a loud (really loud) one with no smell " Yea yea #rosesfart | |||
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"Its real ? " Nah, between you and me it's all a big conspiracy | |||
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"Its real ? Nah, between you and me it's all a big conspiracy " Thank God I knew those women were only tricking me ... | |||
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"Its real ? Nah, between you and me it's all a big conspiracy Thank God I knew those women were only tricking me ..." We have a secret group chat, afterwards we share stories and laugh and all the gullible and naive men. Need something to do after the kitchen's cleaned | |||
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"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it ) Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart " Memories " She must have been blown away on that date! | |||
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"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it ) Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart " Memories She must have been blown away on that date! " After the fart it was only ever going to be one of us to be honest | |||
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"Its real ? Nah, between you and me it's all a big conspiracy Thank God I knew those women were only tricking me ... We have a secret group chat, afterwards we share stories and laugh and all the gullible and naive men. Need something to do after the kitchen's cleaned " Feck....lads we're in trouble | |||
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"I've only been on two dates. First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined. The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er. " That's one horrible first date, yikes! The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha | |||
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"I've only been on two dates. First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined. The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er. That's one horrible first date, yikes! The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha" Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore | |||
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"I've only been on two dates. First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined. The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er. That's one horrible first date, yikes! The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore " Was he Ben Stiller? | |||
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"I've only been on two dates. First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined. The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er. That's one horrible first date, yikes! The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore " Every bloke is wincing here Bo ....you must of had a good look before his mammy took over | |||
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"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore " He actually showed you?! | |||
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"I've only been on two dates. First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined. The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er. That's one horrible first date, yikes! The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha" How often does this happen lads?! | |||
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"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore He actually showed you?! " It was probably some kind of sick fetish of his | |||
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"I've only been on two dates. First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined. The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er. That's one horrible first date, yikes! The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha How often does this happen lads?! " Usually only once because you try never to make that mistake again in fairness | |||
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"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore He actually showed you?! " Ye I went looking for him as he was gone ages he was in a cubicle in the mens room crying. To be fair it looked painful. He then had to give me his mum's number and I had to go to a pay phone (yes I'm that old it was before mobile phones) explain to his mum and get her to come an collect him. | |||
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"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore He actually showed you?! Ye I went looking for him as he was gone ages he was in a cubicle in the mens room crying. To be fair it looked painful. He then had to give me his mum's number and I had to go to a pay phone (yes I'm that old it was before mobile phones) explain to his mum and get her to come an collect him. " I'm skitting... I shouldn't... But I am | |||
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"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore He actually showed you?! Ye I went looking for him as he was gone ages he was in a cubicle in the mens room crying. To be fair it looked painful. He then had to give me his mum's number and I had to go to a pay phone (yes I'm that old it was before mobile phones) explain to his mum and get her to come an collect him. " There's a conversation you didnt think you'd be having at the start of the date | |||
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"Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore He actually showed you?! Ye I went looking for him as he was gone ages he was in a cubicle in the mens room crying. To be fair it looked painful. He then had to give me his mum's number and I had to go to a pay phone (yes I'm that old it was before mobile phones) explain to his mum and get her to come an collect him. " The poor lad (and his poor lad!) | |||
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"Just walking a girl home about 16 yrs of age Leaned in for a kiss and my arse decided to let out a big fart completely out of the blue..(blushing just typing it ) Earlier this year she found me on facebook and sent me a hello message from the uk were she lives We both went though the usual....married,kids,job life and then she wished me well and a ps of " by the way do you remember the fart " Memories " oh god I’m laughing out very loudly. Sorry | |||
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"I've only been on two dates. First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined. The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er. That's one horrible first date, yikes! The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha Donno it was pretty caught he pulled thw zipper up fully and he was bulging through in about 4 or 5 places looked pretty sore Was he Ben Stiller?" Franck and Beans! | |||
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"Firstly he got so pissed he disappeared and gate crashed a funeral wake and then fell asleep on the table . I left him and got a taxi home . " And what was the second date like | |||
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"I've only been on two dates. First was a guy who said we'd go for a meal he was arrogant to waiters in there I was so embarrassed but was a lot younger so didn't say anything. His ex then walked in with her new fella and went ballistic shouting at her about how dare she be dating already they had broken up 6 months previous. I got up paid my half and apologied to the waiter on the way out. The guy had actually contacted me a few days later saying how sorry he was his ex ruined our night and could we meet again. I declined. The 2nd one all seemed to be going ok until he went to the loo and got his penis stuck in his zip and he had to call his mother to come and take him to er. That's one horrible first date, yikes! The second one, why didn't he just yank it back down like we all do!? Haha How often does this happen lads?! " You'd be surprised,but generally only happens each of us once | |||
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"Was just out of a relationship and in truth was in no headspace to date but thought I’d give the then new-fangled tinder thing a go to distract myself. Agreed to meet this guy but was in floods of tears hours before the date, I really should’ve cancelled. It was apparent to me from the get-go that I wasn’t attracted to him but having been too long off the dating scene I had forgotten how to politely wind things up. He got shitfaced and regaled me with story after story about his favourite football club while I spent the date dreaming about getting a burger from Rick’s on my way home. Finally it was home time and he bent down to move in for a hug/kiss but I recoiled and tensed up so when his arms slotted in under mine and he straightened up (he was a lot taller than me) he kinda picked me up like a forklift and.. shook me. He asked how I was going to get home, I said I’d get a taxi and he pointed out that there was one free beside us but I just mumbled something like “not that one, thanks, okay byyyyeee” and pretty much ran off in the direction of Dame St for my much longed for burger. I can’t claim to have been stellar company for him either in fairness but the forklift hug bit still makes me chuckle to myself. " Forklift hug brill | |||
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"Was just out of a relationship and in truth was in no headspace to date but thought I’d give the then new-fangled tinder thing a go to distract myself. Agreed to meet this guy but was in floods of tears hours before the date, I really should’ve cancelled. It was apparent to me from the get-go that I wasn’t attracted to him but having been too long off the dating scene I had forgotten how to politely wind things up. He got shitfaced and regaled me with story after story about his favourite football club while I spent the date dreaming about getting a burger from Rick’s on my way home. Finally it was home time and he bent down to move in for a hug/kiss but I recoiled and tensed up so when his arms slotted in under mine and he straightened up (he was a lot taller than me) he kinda picked me up like a forklift and.. shook me. He asked how I was going to get home, I said I’d get a taxi and he pointed out that there was one free beside us but I just mumbled something like “not that one, thanks, okay byyyyeee” and pretty much ran off in the direction of Dame St for my much longed for burger. I can’t claim to have been stellar company for him either in fairness but the forklift hug bit still makes me chuckle to myself. " It was a two pronged approach. | |||
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"Meet a girl before for a social drink. Standard enough, but the more the conversation went on the more and more if found out that she was dumb and as thick as the wall. It was hard to talk to her and try not correct her on just about everything she said.. But thankfully she gave grate head and loved to fuck ... we meet many times more Hopefully you meant 'great' head coz if you didn't you're shredded " Ouch otherwise lol | |||
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"Meet a girl before for a social drink. Standard enough, but the more the conversation went on the more and more if found out that she was dumb and as thick as the wall. It was hard to talk to her and try not correct her on just about everything she said.. But thankfully she gave grate head and loved to fuck ... we meet many times more Hopefully you meant 'great' head coz if you didn't you're shredded Ouch otherwise lol" My favourite quote if I don’t like it, I’d rather shave my head with a cheese grater | |||
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"Its real ? Nah, between you and me it's all a big conspiracy Thank God I knew those women were only tricking me ... We have a secret group chat, afterwards we share stories and laugh and all the gullible and naive men. Need something to do after the kitchen's cleaned " No wonder the dinners burnt going in to chat when u should be cooking | |||
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"Was just out of a relationship and in truth was in no headspace to date but thought I’d give the then new-fangled tinder thing a go to distract myself. Agreed to meet this guy but was in floods of tears hours before the date, I really should’ve cancelled. It was apparent to me from the get-go that I wasn’t attracted to him but having been too long off the dating scene I had forgotten how to politely wind things up. He got shitfaced and regaled me with story after story about his favourite football club while I spent the date dreaming about getting a burger from Rick’s on my way home. Finally it was home time and he bent down to move in for a hug/kiss but I recoiled and tensed up so when his arms slotted in under mine and he straightened up (he was a lot taller than me) he kinda picked me up like a forklift and.. shook me. He asked how I was going to get home, I said I’d get a taxi and he pointed out that there was one free beside us but I just mumbled something like “not that one, thanks, okay byyyyeee” and pretty much ran off in the direction of Dame St for my much longed for burger. I can’t claim to have been stellar company for him either in fairness but the forklift hug bit still makes me chuckle to myself. " Did he go beep beep beep as he backed away? | |||
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"I had a social with a guy from another site. Met him at a shopping centre and we had coffee. He was wearing a black and yellow hand knitted bumble bee jumper. He asked me back to his home to have tea and scones with his mum so I refused and left. He followed me round the shopping centre in the style of James Bond jumping in and out of shops at me. I finally got rid of him in Ann Summers where I sought refuge in a changing room! He text me later asking me to marry him! I refused. " The thought of him trying to discretely follow you dressed like that made me laugh | |||
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"I've never been on a date in my life" Me neither, but reading this thread it sounds very funny and I love having a laugh... | |||
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"I've never been on a date in my life" This....even with the ex husband. We met at work and lived at work so didn't really date | |||
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"if any of the ladies feel they're missing out Im available. I don't promise on my profile to go down on you for hours or to fuck all night but my jesus can I bring you on a really good crap date " You’re too far away from me unfortunately. I love crap dates as it’s all I’m used to.... | |||
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