FabSwingers.com forum: Have respect and answer back

By *tevecabra7 OP Man
over a year ago

cabra

I always ask people on here question nice and polite I dont show dik pics at at all, but wiuld be nice dor a reply to say yes or no to a question I ask SAD GUY HERE

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By *avana_oh_na_naWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

Nobody owes you anything. Women get literally hundreds of messages a day on here, it's not possible me to reply to them all. We all have lives you know?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always ask people on here question nice and polite I dont show dik pics at at all, but wiuld be nice dor a reply to say yes or no to a question I ask SAD GUY HERE "

No one owes you a reply. As another poster said some people get hundreds of messages and don't have the time to reply. Often the case when a reply is sent there is abuse or a question as to why.

Let it go and move on.

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By *allyWally19Woman
over a year ago

The Road to Nowhere

OK...this has come up once or 17 million times.

I used to reply to say 'thanks but no thanks'. It opened the door to the one or all of the following:

A. Abuse

B. Questions on why

C. An essay type message of how they will give me the 'best night of my life'

Please note....this list is non exhaustive.

I would imagine I am not in the minority here but women of fab, feel free to correct me.

Due to this, if I'm not interested, I don't reply. It is absolutely NOT a personal attack on the person who messaged me. It is 100% my preference as to who I am interested in and who I'm not.

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By *ancyachatnowMan
over a year ago

Newbridge

I agree ??

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By *tevecabra7 OP Man
over a year ago

cabra

I know no 1 owes me qnything but a simle yes or no wiuld be nice ya know manners cost nothing yea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know no 1 owes me qnything but a simle yes or no wiuld be nice ya know manners cost nothing yea"

So I try and reply to any message I get but why should I when a guy I politely thank for his message and sat not interested can than process to hurl abuse for example

"Fat slut" or "sure your fake you would get up on you"

That's mild some of the abuse I have seen women get here is actually shocking.

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By *avana_oh_na_naWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"I know no 1 owes me qnything but a simle yes or no wiuld be nice ya know manners cost nothing yea"

Not replying to a stranger is not bad manners. Writing "How are you" to a randomer and expecting a response in the form of a sonnet about how you may or may not be the one for me is bad manners. This is the internet, no reply = not interested. Move on.

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By *tevecabra7 OP Man
over a year ago

cabra

Not men are all rhe same im a nice respectable guy yea and id never be disrespectful to any female beacuse with out females us nen would be fuxked so im.nit in.rhe class of a scumbag who gives women disrspect.

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By *allyWally19Woman
over a year ago

The Road to Nowhere

Shur how are we to know what each man is & isn't like?

Regardless, it is OUR PREFERENCE

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By *allyWally19Woman
over a year ago

The Road to Nowhere

Also...ya can't believe EVERYTHING you read on the aul interweb

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

Here you go OP.

From the Fab FAQ at the bottom of the home page:

There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?

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By *tevecabra7 OP Man
over a year ago

cabra

Well mqybe wil I make.annew.profile so

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

"Well mqybe wil I make.annew.profile so"

I don't generally look at guys profiles so have no clue what your one has in it.

Do read the FAQ and the Introduction forum also.

Might help, I don't know as I'm not hunting actively much myself.

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

There's a Site Help & a Swinging Support forums also

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By *B 4099Man
over a year ago

North West, Outer Letterkenny area

"Well mqybe wil I make.annew.profile so"

Don't think he means make a new profile OP. Just change some things to make you stand out more. Write an interesting bio. And some interesting fun pics. And take it from there.

I know I'm being a hypocrite here as my bio is rubbish and my pics are dull. But I hope you understand what I mean.

No replies happen all the time, I just assume the person has either no interest, lost interest or has too many messages. Either way can't change it. Just don't take it personally.

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

No one owes you a reply. I use to answer as many messages as I could. But now I don't any more as it opens the door to conversation when you do. Even a polite no thanks will start some asking why etc and yea some abuse at times but those don't even get read because I can tell the gist before I open them usually.

I don't get hundreds of mail because I keep my filters tight because I don't want a load of messages when I log on. But I also don't want to spend most of my time on here replying to people I am not ever going to meet or I have nothing in common with.

Deleting your profile and coming back with a basic profile will not improve your chances anymore than now. I cannot give you advise on your profile as you haven't asked. But I know the first thing I do before I even read a message is look at the profile a blank or very basic profile has a lot less chance of getting a reply than one someone has taken time to write about themselves on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to reply to the many messages we received with a Polite response etc but the next message would then typically be

Can we meet ? Can I fuck her ?

So now I don’t bother . I use the delete button

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know no 1 owes me qnything but a simle yes or no wiuld be nice ya know manners cost nothing yea"

No one owes u a reply because u send a mail and it's not bad manners if they reply.

No reply no interest

You cant take stuff like that personal on a online site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always ask people on here question nice and polite I dont show dik pics at at all, but wiuld be nice dor a reply to say yes or no to a question I ask SAD GUY HERE "

Ladies here are totally swamped with Messages..they might read some they might read others but the choice of replying is totally theirs and theirs alone...now of course l fully understand how you feel .. absolutely... but compared to the amount of letters you write and the amount that ladies receive here the ratio is approx 80/1..so it has to be something extra special to catch a lady's attention here ..and then something even more special to keep it ....they rule this jungle.

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By *issMakaxWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

"OK...this has come up once or 17 million times.

I used to reply to say 'thanks but no thanks'. It opened the door to the one or all of the following:

A. Abuse

B. Questions on why

C. An essay type message of how they will give me the 'best night of my life'

Please note....this list is non exhaustive.

I would imagine I am not in the minority here but women of fab, feel free to correct me.

Due to this, if I'm not interested, I don't reply. It is absolutely NOT a personal attack on the person who messaged me. It is 100% my preference as to who I am interested in and who I'm not.

Exactly this ! I don't bother replying much anymore because of all this !

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By *ortadowncplCouple
over a year ago

Portadown

It’s very easy to get 300 messages on a busy day if you post that you are looking to meet. You take 1 minute to reply to each - that’s 5 hours work. And at least 1/3 will want to know why not and whilst you reply you are online and so receiving more messages.

It’s mathematically improbable that a couple or female will be able to reply to each message. You skim looking for people who fit your criteria and group delete the rest and it can STILL take hours.

/tldr: takes too long to do, and if you didn’t read the above you should see the irony and go fuck yourself you self entitled bitch.

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By *ashy85Man
over a year ago

Waterford

Shur how are we to know what each man is & isn't like?

Regardless, it is OUR PREFERENCE "

I hate that word. it's getting like Preference is the new Privilege.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some examples of what I have being called for taking the time to answer back politely.... Fat flabby riddled with diseases whore slut tramp bitch c*unt self entitled asshole shall I continue?

You don't know the person you are replying to. Lots want a explanation why you don't find their blank profile with one dick picture appealing. Lots are fine and thankful you take the time to reply. But then there are the boys who can't take rejection well and throw their toys out of the cot and say mean nasty things to make themselves feel better.

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By *ortadowncplCouple
over a year ago

Portadown

Shur how are we to know what each man is & isn't like?

Regardless, it is OUR PREFERENCE

I hate that word. it's getting like Preference is the new Privilege."

Preferences are important, I would be very wary of anyone who doesn’t agree.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately some men fail to see this argument from the women's side ,even when its clearly being spelled out to them why girls don't reply. Even beside all those reasons,the name calling,abuse the essay texts.... NOBODY OWES YOU ANYTHING

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

Shur how are we to know what each man is & isn't like?

Regardless, it is OUR PREFERENCE

I hate that word. it's getting like Preference is the new Privilege."

Congrats on the rapiest post in a while

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"I always ask people on here question nice and polite I dont show dik pics at at all, but wiuld be nice dor a reply to say yes or no to a question I ask SAD GUY HERE "
A no reply is a NO why don't you understand that?

quick question op do you reply to all the junk mail you get at home because I bet you don't so its no different on here .

I'd rather spend time chatting to people I'm interested in than to people I aint

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always ask people on here question nice and polite I dont show dik pics at at all, but wiuld be nice dor a reply to say yes or no to a question I ask SAD GUY HERE A no reply is a NO why don't you understand that?

quick question op do you reply to all the junk mail you get at home because I bet you don't so its no different on here .

I'd rather spend time chatting to people I'm interested in than to people I aint

Very true I don't reply to the Nigerian Prince offering me millions in my spam in personal email so why would I reply to the total stranger with a blank profile here.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

quick question op do you reply to all the junk mail you get at home because I bet you don't so its no different on here .

I'd rather spend time chatting to people I'm interested in than to people I aint

Very true I don't reply to the Nigerian Prince offering me millions in my spam in personal email so why would I reply to the total stranger with a blank profile here. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have respect and don’t expect a reply. It was one of the boxes you ticked when you joined: no reply means no interest (or busy) so don’t annoy profiles.

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By *allyWally19Woman
over a year ago

The Road to Nowhere

Shur how are we to know what each man is & isn't like?

Regardless, it is OUR PREFERENCE

I hate that word. it's getting like Preference is the new Privilege."

But you have a preference of non single guys and women 20 - 50. Does this make you privileged?

I have a preference in the type of man I go for. I will not engage with people I'm not interested in.

Would you prefer the word choice? Coz I gots a lot of them too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s rude not to reply. It’s called manners. Whether u get loads of messages or not its manners to reply back. If ur not interested just say it rather than ignore the person who put the effort in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s rude not to reply. It’s called manners. Whether u get loads of messages or not its manners to reply back. If ur not interested just say it rather than ignore the person who put the effort in "

Do you reply if a lad or TS/TV/CD messages you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shiver me timbers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everybody yes !!

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By *ungry CatCouple
over a year ago

Belfast

Yet you don't respect a woman's choice not to reply to people she has no interest in and are too quick to say that women have no manners because they don't reply to your messages?

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By *assion and MoreCouple
over a year ago

Here and There, Monaghan

the try to answer most messages, unless overtly rude or vulgar. From our limited experience, most guys can't take 'No', are not respectful of our preferences or even bother to read our profile. I can see why ignore / block is a good option for people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fair enough I understand that part but if a guy is nice n polite it should be answered back. That’s only my take on all of this .

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

A friend joined on my recommendation a few weeks ago

Over 5 days she got over 2000 messages

She tried to answer and gave up totally overwhelmed with them all

and left the site

We all have preferences

We all have certain messages blocked

Thats life ....move on and dont be seen as another whinging man who creates a post,gets replies he doesn't like and leaves the site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fair enough I understand that part but if a guy is nice n polite it should be answered back. That’s only my take on all of this ."

Just because the first message is polite does not always mean when u politely say not interested he won't hurl abuse. I've even had verified guys get nasty over been turned down.

At end of day No reply is no reply. It's a chance we all take when sending messages.

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

"A friend joined on my recommendation a few weeks ago

Over 5 days she got over 2000 messages

She tried to answer and gave up totally overwhelmed with them all

and left the site

We all have preferences

We all have certain messages blocked

Thats life ....move on and dont be seen as another whinging man who creates a post,gets replies he doesn't like and leaves the site "

Damn BM, she joined on your recommendation and you didn't seem to have told her that it's hugely import to set tight filters straight from the beginning... tut tut

....

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By *rmrspumpCouple
over a year ago

narnia

"Fair enough I understand that part but if a guy is nice n polite it should be answered back. That’s only my take on all of this ."

Your local electric company sends you a very polite letter asking you to switch to thier service, do you send them back a nicy crafted letter telling them sorry, but you aren't interested? No, you toss it in the bin, you didn't ask for thier letter, you owe them nothing. Just because you send someone a polite message doesn't mean they owe you anything, they don't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A different non swinging site I was on had a very simple system which worked well.

If the lady was not interested she just hit a tab and it sent an automatic response basically saying - Thank you for mailing but no thank you - or words to that effect.

It then meant you could no longer message her. I think it is a good system and at least you did get a nice response.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How about I give you my log in and password and you can reply to all my unsolicited dick pics and passing now wanna fuck messages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reply, ahhh, maybe people should read profiles, and respect them, take age for instance, no we don't want someone younger than our kids for a threesome. And the "I know I'm not in your agegroup, but",. And don't forget the, hi I can accommodate now if you'd like to drop everything, and drive to Dublin, so I can fuck your wife. Nope, we'll be selfish, and only reply to whomever we want, when we want.

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"A friend joined on my recommendation a few weeks ago

Over 5 days she got over 2000 messages

She tried to answer and gave up totally overwhelmed with them all

and left the site

We all have preferences

We all have certain messages blocked

Thats life ....move on and dont be seen as another whinging man who creates a post,gets replies he doesn't like and leaves the site

Damn BM, she joined on your recommendation and you didn't seem to have told her that it's hugely import to set tight filters straight from the beginning... tut tut

....

I know she didn't tell me when she was on until it was too late

I then explained how to use the filters

She'll come back but she's just not able to yet

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

On the sister site dogging.co.uk

They had an automated message reply for such instances...

"Soory not onterested"

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By *ortadowncplCouple
over a year ago

Portadown

"Fair enough I understand that part but if a guy is nice n polite it should be answered back. That’s only my take on all of this ."

Your take is wrong.

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By *allyWally19Woman
over a year ago

The Road to Nowhere

"Fair enough I understand that part but if a guy is nice n polite it should be answered back. That’s only my take on all of this .

This!!! Yes! Excellent way of putting it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your local electric company sends you a very polite letter asking you to switch to their service, do you send them back a nicy crafted letter telling them sorry, but you aren't interested? No, you toss it in the bin, you didn't ask for thier letter, you owe them nothing. Just because you send someone a polite message doesn't mean they owe you anything, they don't "

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By *ornyfireCouple
over a year ago

Middle Earth

"OK...this has come up once or 17 million times.

I used to reply to say 'thanks but no thanks'. It opened the door to the one or all of the following:

A. Abuse

B. Questions on why

C. An essay type message of how they will give me the 'best night of my life'

Please note....this list is non exhaustive.

I would imagine I am not in the minority here but women of fab, feel free to correct me.

Due to this, if I'm not interested, I don't reply. It is absolutely NOT a personal attack on the person who messaged me. It is 100% my preference as to who I am interested in and who I'm not.

This because once you reply No they keep messaging easier just delete.

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By *Belfast_FellaMan
over a year ago

belfast

This ain't it chief.

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By *mooth Operator 07Man
over a year ago

in the deep mist of the valleys

"Reply, ahhh, maybe people should read profiles, and respect them, take age for instance, no we don't want someone younger than our kids for a threesome. And the "I know I'm not in your agegroup, but",. And don't forget the, hi I can accommodate now if you'd like to drop everything, and drive to Dublin, so I can fuck your wife. Nope, we'll be selfish, and only reply to whomever we want, when we want."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always ask people on here question nice and polite I dont show dik pics at at all, but wiuld be nice dor a reply to say yes or no to a question I ask SAD GUY HERE "

The rules of the site state that no reply means no thanks.

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By *mooth Operator 07Man
over a year ago

in the deep mist of the valleys

OP just respect what the ladies are saying, if they don't want to reply for any reason respect it and move on. If a woman replies back to your message and says she not interested, send a polite message back and move on. Simple really.

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"OP just respect what the ladies are saying, if they don't want to reply for any reason respect it and move on. If a woman replies back to your message and says she not interested, send a polite message back and move on. Simple really.

Thats why people don't reply ...it leads to further messages when you reply saying no thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not just women who dont reply though. Like most guys here,the odd time I'd get mails from guys.

I have no interest in them and just dont respond.

Not because I'm getting inundated with 100s of mails, nor cuz I'm afraid that they will come back to me with abuse, but simply cuz I couldn't be arsed, and that's reason enough for me.

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By *eb1998Man
over a year ago

town

Literally if the women are not interested in you there not interested you can't abuse them we all have lives outside of this aswel

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By *ueenbeetipp43Woman
over a year ago

tipperary

Shur how are we to know what each man is & isn't like?

Regardless, it is OUR PREFERENCE

I hate that word. it's getting like Preference is the new Privilege.

Congrats on the rapiest post in a while

That made me snorty laugh...

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By *lyes88Man
over a year ago

dublin

[Removed by poster at 04/08/20 17:13:02]

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By *tevecabra7 OP Man
over a year ago

cabra

Fook me I didnt think this would have caused so much shit wow so basically the rude dick pic sending no respect for women are fucking it up for me and guys like me. Listen ive the hight of respect fir women without women us men would be lost u cant beat the touch the smell the look of a woman so bascially if I offended women with my post APOLOGIES but I know you have to be carefull who yous chat to.MAYBE I WILL GET A CHANCE TO SHOW A LADY HOW MUCH IF A GENT I AM A KIND TAUGHTFULL ONE. THANKS FOR ALL REPLIES AND HAPOY FABBING TO EVERYONE ..

ALL MY LOVE STEPHEN XXX

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By *ungry CatCouple
over a year ago

Belfast

"Fook me I didnt think this would have caused so much shit wow so basically the rude dick pic sending no respect for women are fucking it up for me and guys like me. Listen ive the hight of respect fir women without women us men would be lost u cant beat the touch the smell the look of a woman so bascially if I offended women with my post APOLOGIES but I know you have to be carefull who yous chat to.MAYBE I WILL GET A CHANCE TO SHOW A LADY HOW MUCH IF A GENT I AM A KIND TAUGHTFULL ONE. THANKS FOR ALL REPLIES AND HAPOY FABBING TO EVERYONE ..

ALL MY LOVE STEPHEN XXX"

People twisting things into what they want to believe and OP you are a part of a problem as you keep telling everyone how much of a nice guy you are by disrespecting women's choice not to reply to your contacts and looking for someone to blame.

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By *tevecabra7 OP Man
over a year ago

cabra

ALL MY LOVE STEPHEN XXX

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By *hett and scarlettCouple
over a year ago

Dublin

"Fair enough I understand that part but if a guy is nice n polite it should be answered back. That’s only my take on all of this .

Can you imagine if you did respond to the potential new electricity provider, with a polite no thanks, I’m happy with the service I’m getting, then they come back with a Fuck You, Didn’t Want Your Business Anyway, You Probably Stick Candles In Your Mouldy Fanny Anyway You Ugly Fuck style of follow up.

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By *tevecabra7 OP Man
over a year ago

cabra

Im.part of a problem ?????+

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By *rmrspumpCouple
over a year ago

narnia

"Fair enough I understand that part but if a guy is nice n polite it should be answered back. That’s only my take on all of this .

Well BT ARE cunts, I'd not be surprised..

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By *ungry CatCouple
over a year ago

Belfast

"Fair enough I understand that part but if a guy is nice n polite it should be answered back. That’s only my take on all of this .

100%

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

ALL MY LOVE STEPHEN XXX"

No the rude guys are not ruining it for you. They may be a reason why some women don't answer you. But a decent profile and a thought out first message greatly increase your chances of a reply.It doesn't matter how many times you say you respect women etc first impressions count. And to be most people believe they are decent even the ones who do give abuse most likely don't even see it as abuse and if you ask them they will have some excuse as to why it was justified. And that's not just the guys either.

But guys using other guys as an excuse is a cop out. The ratio is completely against singles guys so quite simply you have to put effort in if you want results.

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By *mooth Operator 07Man
over a year ago

in the deep mist of the valleys

"Im.part of a problem ?????+"

Let it go if I was you, take this forum of discussion as a blessing and a lesson learnt. None of us are perfect, but we can always learn from our mistakes. This is not having a pop at you, just a bit of advice

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By *tevecabra7 OP Man
over a year ago

cabra

thanks everyone for the comments I hope I didnt come.across as a moaney fook im.not honestly lol so to all of you who wrote on my comment I appreciate it and take it all on board yous are very kind . regards Stephen x

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By *mooth Operator 07Man
over a year ago

in the deep mist of the valleys

"thanks everyone for the comments I hope I didnt come.across as a moaney fook im.not honestly lol so to all of you who wrote on my comment I appreciate it and take it all on board yous are very kind . regards Stephen x "

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By *he SophisticatsCouple
over a year ago

Casa Del Fun

"I know no 1 owes me qnything but a simle yes or no wiuld be nice ya know manners cost nothing yea"

You see this is the kind of replies we talk about. Non acceptance of preferences which leads to ‘but why? I’m a sound bloke’ or ‘Just a simple yes or no would be mannerly’...

What happens is that you’re trying to break down barriers etc and keeping a form of dialect going, which is pointless if you’ve been told that someone’s not interested. That usually leads to a block with us...

To save us from responding to people who either clearly just look at our photos and don’t read our profile and check out our preferences, we just delete...

Yes, it’s time consuming for us,

Yes, our time is precious, and we are not going to waste it

Also, check out the forum FYIs

It states there that a no reply is still a reply

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

Fascinating how same peeps get heated up by the same boring and returning topic.

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By *oxminxCouple
over a year ago

NaughtyVille *×* Laois

Our tip.

Simply read the profile thoroughly... take note of what the profile owner/s are seeking and interested in. Don't waste members time with sheer ignorance.

We are not seeking guy's (as per our profile) but had 12 guy's send lovely mails today... but alas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know no 1 owes me qnything but a simle yes or no wiuld be nice ya know manners cost nothing yea"

I think that possible for guys, as I can guarantee the volume of mail women receive will be huuuugggge relatively speaking, and as everyone has a busy life outside of Fab its just not possible.

I think it follows a similar paradym to interviews- if you are successful you get an email of confirmation, if not you may not, given the volume of application they generally won't allocate the time to reply to everyone.....of course I could be incorrect here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know no 1 owes me qnything but a simle yes or no wiuld be nice ya know manners cost nothing yea

Agreed, don't take it personally and move on.

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By *issme39Woman
over a year ago

kildare

"Fair enough I understand that part but if a guy is nice n polite it should be answered back. That’s only my take on all of this .

I am howling at this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Answer back and get abuse cause you politely said no. This is happening to often. Hence why no one can message me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not men are all rhe same im a nice respectable guy yea and id never be disrespectful to any female beacuse with out females us nen would be fuxked so im.nit in.rhe class of a scumbag who gives women disrspect. "
You should maybe rethink if you should be on Fab. I'm sure your a lovely guy. But if this is what upsets you about Fab . Then your going to need to be a lot tougher to survive.

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By *unnyfookMan
over a year ago

Naas

most men here eventually go through the phase of "why won't you answer me"

just get used to it

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By *eralt80Man
over a year ago

cork

"Answer back and get abuse cause you politely said no. This is happening to often. Hence why no one can message me "

But what if an African prince wants to transfer vast sums of money to your account

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