FabSwingers.com forum: Maintaining chats

By *attooed Rob OP Man
over a year ago

Hornchurch

Hey Fabbers,

Relatively new to the site, I seem to get plenty of replies from my initial messages however I’m not having to much success maintaining a consistent chat.

Any advice here? I’m not pushy so don’t scare people off with propositions nor just focus on small talk.

Thanks!

Rob

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By *atBottomGirlsWoman
over a year ago

St Austell-ish

Great that you're getting replies!

I chat with quite a few people, and these are some of the things that make a difference to me:

Don't start a new message when picking up on a previous conversation. It can be hard to keep track of people when you get a lot of messages, and as site supporters have previous messages to look back on, it's a lot easier to look at those than figure out who you were, and what's already been said, when I've chatted with who knows how many people since our last chat.

Send new messages as if you're picking up on the last conversation, or with something interesting! I get quite a few "haven't chatted with you for a week, how's things" messages, that really don't interest me (do you really want to hear what all I've been doing at work all week?).

Ask to send a friend request. Uninvited ones are irritating, but being on a friends list means they can find you more easily than having to scroll through pages of old messages.

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By *attooed Rob OP Man
over a year ago

Hornchurch

Hey- thanks for the reply!

Yes I do try and keep conversations flowing by answering questions and not starting multiple topics etc. That’s a good idea about asking to be a friend so you’re rememberable.

I think theres a fine balance between being too forward and not pushy at the same time.

What initial approach generally grabs your attention? How about the subject line as I guess it would need to stand out in a sea of emails.

Thanks for your advice!

Have a great weekend

Rob x

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By *r_Jake70Man
over a year ago

London

There are no hard and fast rules to messaging. You have to be yourself and temper and steer them according to how you’d like to. What works for some people doesn’t for others, but genuine, personal messaging will always cut through any kind of forced statements or attempts to bullshit someone into bed. Each discourse is unique and will move at its own pace. I’ve had first message to social to play meet in under a day or several months; it isn’t a one size fit all kind of deal. Just be honest, if it doesn’t last then it’s usually because it wasn’t meant to. Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There are no hard and fast rules to messaging. You have to be yourself and temper and steer them according to how you’d like to. What works for some people doesn’t for others, but genuine, personal messaging will always cut through any kind of forced statements or attempts to bullshit someone into bed. Each discourse is unique and will move at its own pace. I’ve had first message to social to play meet in under a day or several months; it isn’t a one size fit all kind of deal. Just be honest, if it doesn’t last then it’s usually because it wasn’t meant to. Good luck. "

Very well said as per Jake

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By *attooed Rob OP Man
over a year ago

Hornchurch

Great thanks very much mate!

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By *arbarianzCouple
over a year ago

BARNSTAPLE

I posted something akin to this in another similar thread.. I can only speak for US. but.. humour is important. as is getting to the point. beating around the bush too much is redundant. oh, and READ their profiles.

we've had somebody today who contacted us who had 'if you don't like kissing, don't message me' yet.. they messaged us.. and one of our lines says.. if it comes to single guys.. no kissing. you're there to be used by my wife. not have some kind of intimacy :P

in essence, without sounding cold, single dudes are ten a penny.. so don't give somebody an excuse to nyx you :P

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I can't see this on your profile.

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