FabSwingers.com forum: Worst day ever, let down terribly

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Sooooo........

I have a friend, that I've met from fab, but we were more friends than anything else, got on well, spent a bit of time together. He's a professional man, good job, decent lifestyle, old fashioned manners, what I thought was an all round decent man.

He needed a plus one to wedding, and last-minute invited me yesterday, for a wedding today.

Nothing in it, just so didn't have to go on his own. I made a massive effort, so I sorted a dress, booked hair and make up this morning, and half an hour before he was due to pick me up let me down.

No explanation, nothing, no crosswords, no reason at all.

It is made me feel horrendous. I made such an effort to be the best me for him, thinking I was doing a decent thing. And it's made me feel horrendous. Gutted and disappointed to the core.

It's not had a bad experience on here, but this has blown it out the water. It's knocked me far more than I ever thought I could be knocked!!! Help!

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By *hunkyThighsMan
over a year ago

Gloucester

Strange behaviour of him, but normally in my experience/thoughts of weddings is that you rarely get a plus 1 invited without a name, unless they know you’ve been in a long term relationship but never met the other half.

Maybe he asked if he could change his plus one and they’ve said no, or maybe he’s assumed he had one and he didn’t.

Weddings are cheap and like I’ve said, from experience of friends and family weddings, plus ones are the first to get cut if not serious.

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By *hunkyThighsMan
over a year ago

Gloucester

I wouldn’t beat yourself up over it, you look Great and fair play to you for making all that Redford. Shame you didn’t get straight answers.

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

"Sooooo........

He needed a plus one to wedding, and last-minute invited me yesterday, for a wedding today.

Nothing in it, just so didn't have to go on his own. I made a massive effort, so I sorted a dress, booked hair and make up this morning, and half an hour before he was due to pick me up let me down.

No explanation, nothing, no crosswords, no reason at all.

It is made me feel horrendous. I made such an effort to be the best me for him, thinking I was doing a decent thing. And it's made me feel horrendous. Gutted and disappointed to the core.

It's not had a bad experience on here, but this has blown it out the water. It's knocked me far more than I ever thought I could be knocked!!! Help!

Wow that’s some let down and I can imagine how disappointed you are ...

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Don't give him another chance to let you down. Block, report as a no show and move on. X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

He was an integral part of the wedding and had an open plus one.

It's flattering that he invited me, but surely if he changed his mind he would've contacted me. We've been friends a while, and didn't strike me as the type to behave like that. It's just also strange, I think that's why I'm struggling with it .

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks girls

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Overthinking is going to drive you crazy. Ask him. Perhaps there’s a really simple explanation and you’ll be laughing when you hear it. Perhaps he’s a total dickhead and hearing him make his pathetic excuses will help you see that.

Sending positive vibes, I know it’s hard but try not to Let this get you down.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

He's just ignored my messages, I've asked him. And he's blanked me. I'm more confused than anything else

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

It seems strange that he didn't invite you until yesterday

a disappointment like that is hard especially when you've made such an effort and it all seems most odd on his part. How dud he let you know?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"He's just ignored my messages, I've asked him. And he's blanked me. I'm more confused than anything else "

Oh crap... Pmed you

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By *olexMan
over a year ago

Hull

Cut him free from your life. He clearly has no respect for you or your feelings. Any man with manners would never do such a thing.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Cut him free from your life. He clearly has no respect for you or your feelings. Any man with manners would never do such a thing."

I agree. It's just weird behaviour to invite you one day then the next go silent,no wonder you're feeling the way you are that's a horrible thing to do. It's not like it was just for coffee,being invited to a wedding is a huge thing.

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By *ighland gentlemanMan
over a year ago

Ardgay

Not a pleasant experience for you in the least.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Did he invite you last minute because his original guest coukdnt make it. Like you were a plan b?

I can imagine how bad you feel after going to a lot of effort. It's odd and I imagine extremely disappointing that he blanking your messages now.

You deserve an explanation. If you don't get one block him, dust yourself down and move on x

Hell block the prick anyway

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By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth

You look gorgeous ...he is a weirdo..dont try and analyse it or think its anything rational or to do with you, you will forget him as soon as you meet a normal person ...treat yourself and have a laugh

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Already blocked!!!

He had an open invite, hasn't been seeing anyone, and I think was toying with the idea and threw it out there. I'm pretty sure he expected me to say no, when I said yes he went into overdrive. He even text me at 6 o'clock this morning to make sure I was awake in time to get ready.? The mind baffles me

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By *lay2018Couple
over a year ago

westmeath & roscommon.

We have been let down on here for meets and very disappointing.

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By *lay2018Couple
over a year ago

westmeath & roscommon.

"Already blocked!!!

Is he still alive?

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

He's a dick,don't waste another second of your thoughts on him.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Already blocked!!!

Is he still alive?"

Oh yeah, logging on to whats.App regularly.

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By *969BewitchedWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

wow, that is a terrible way to treat you. I would have been really upset if it was me especially as you've been friends for a while.

Hope you are ok x

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By *oomilsCouple
over a year ago

kettering

Shocking and disrespectful behaviour! Shame on him that’s all I would say. Your the better person for showing your thoughtful side. My guess is that the guy is probably not in any position to take anyone anywhere in public for fear of being busted as a cheat. Dust yourself off and do not let this bad experience ruin anything xxxxx

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

Mine came to my Xmas do dressed in a jumper ! A 5 star hotel dressed as Val Doonacan ! When he turned up at my door, I thought fuck you, you can be embarassed and took him. I am sure he expected me to row, I just thought what a dick.

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By *untingtonMan
over a year ago

Chorley

What an idiot and rude to go with it.

Try not to let him upset you and ruin your weekend.

Just think about what he missed out on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"He's just ignored my messages, I've asked him. And he's blanked me. I'm more confused than anything else "

Awww this isn’t nice is it?

Lots of love to you. From a man to a women - respect and love to you. Making such an effort says so much about you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"He's just ignored my messages, I've asked him. And he's blanked me. I'm more confused than anything else

Awww this isn’t nice is it?

Lots of love to you. From a man to a women - respect and love to you. Making such an effort says so much about you.

Thankyou

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Awww, what a shame

Really feel for you OP. What a horrible way for things to turn out.

There’s no fathoming people sometimes. Don’t be surprised if you hear from him with some sort of explanation. From the little you have told us about him it sounds like it was out of character behaviour. Or maybe this is the real him. If so then probably not the kind of person you’d want in your life.

You’ll have to update us all if you DO hear from him.

V x

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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago

Stoke area

How dreadful to be let down after you make so much effort. I do hope he does have a good explanation why things went wrong and apologises big style.

But why was he asking you such short notice ? It all sounds very odd .

Sending hugs xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm so sorry to see how badly you were let down. I really felt for you when I read this.

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

I'm so sorry.

You sounded like a last minute decision because the person he did invite was blowing hot and cold and left it last minute to give an an answer.

If he ignored your text he is not worth it.

Block the prick and sever all contact with him. You will probably find he will try and crawl back after the weekend.

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By *aughty But Nice TwiceWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract

"He's just ignored my messages, I've asked him. And he's blanked me. I'm more confused than anything else "

Omg I'm sorry but wat a prick hope you ok hun xx PM if you wanna chat I'm a great listener xx

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By *ettyboop61Woman
over a year ago

St Neots

I can't stand men that think they can treat women like that......that's so disrespectful......

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By *aughty But Nice TwiceWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract

"I can't stand men that think they can treat women like that......that's so disrespectful......

Karma is a bitch

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks everyone.

Had some lovely supportive messages on here and privately. Feeling the fab love!

Xxx

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

Yes, but anything new?

Or still ignoring you?

As other's have said, this might just be the thing for you to say "Fuck it, time to move on and he isn't a friend"

Anyway, smile, it's a Sunday!

(easy to say, hard to do)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"He's just ignored my messages, I've asked him. And he's blanked me. I'm more confused than anything else "

Maybe he is embarrassed and has no idea what to say. Not an excuse but a different angle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seems yesterday was the day for it.

I hope you are ok xx

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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria

"He's just ignored my messages, I've asked him. And he's blanked me. I'm more confused than anything else

Maybe he is embarrassed and has no idea what to say. Not an excuse but a different angle."

He should be embarrassed, anyway he’s had long enough to even try to apologise for his crappy behaviour, if this is the kind of person he is you would be well to forget him sweet, maybe upsetting to do so now but can you trust him not to do something similar again, he’s a grown man not a child, to me there’s no excuse for him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Feeing better today? Ready to slaughter the fuckwit if he contacts you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Feeing better today? Ready to slaughter the fuckwit if he contacts you?

Absofuckingloutely

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

[Removed by poster at 19/05/19 09:11:59]

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Maybe he was abducted and spent the night being anally probed by aliens who have erased his memory

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe he was abducted and spent the night being anally probed by aliens who have erased his memory "

Lets hope they removed more than just his memory

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unforgivable, how dare he!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe he was abducted and spent the night being anally probed by aliens who have erased his memory "

Yeah that's it

Let's see if he uses this excuse personally I think he will never be seen again!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's just a shitty thing to do!!

Fair enough a day before but half hrs notice?

Please tell me you blocked him and don't give him a 2nd thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hope you're feeling loads better today.

Take him out from under that microscope, wrap tightly, and flush down toilet.

You're better than him xxx

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Did he invite you last minute because his original guest coukdnt make it. Like you were a plan b?

This is the answer, he had a plan a who was prevaricating, sorted a plan b (which sadly was you OP) but his original came back to him.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

From social media photos, he went on his own. Which makes even less sense. Still haven't heard from him, just feel more disappointed that I was such a poor judge of character.

But, new day, onwards and upwards. Can't dwell on the scrapheap

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

"From social media photos, he went on his own. Which makes even less sense. Still haven't heard from him, just feel more disappointed that I was such a poor judge of character.

But, new day, onwards and upwards. Can't dwell on the scrapheap

Just remember scrap is a very sought after commodity.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"From social media photos, he went on his own. Which makes even less sense. Still haven't heard from him, just feel more disappointed that I was such a poor judge of character.

But, new day, onwards and upwards. Can't dwell on the scrapheap

You've blocked him, you won't hear from him.

This will take you a few days to process I reckon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"From social media photos, he went on his own. Which makes even less sense. Still haven't heard from him, just feel more disappointed that I was such a poor judge of character.

But, new day, onwards and upwards. Can't dwell on the scrapheap

Here’s to the next adventure then

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By *il73Woman
over a year ago

Hyde

"From social media photos, he went on his own. Which makes even less sense. Still haven't heard from him, just feel more disappointed that I was such a poor judge of character.

But, new day, onwards and upwards. Can't dwell on the scrapheap

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

"From social media photos, he went on his own. Which makes even less sense. Still haven't heard from him, just feel more disappointed that I was such a poor judge of character.

But, new day, onwards and upwards. Can't dwell on the scrapheap

Stop looking on social media.

It will make it worse.

Walk away, go watch a film, go for a walk, do something other than being online.

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By *il73Woman
over a year ago

Hyde

Hmmm do you think he had a last minute reality check panic along the lines of ' how do explain this relationship to my family etc' ' what about photos' ' just realised so and so will be there too' ??

Still very shitty tho..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Already blocked!!!

I'm leaving the girls to console on this one, they seem to have the best idea. Best wishes!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sooooo........

He needed a plus one to wedding, and last-minute invited me yesterday, for a wedding today.

Nothing in it, just so didn't have to go on his own. I made a massive effort, so I sorted a dress, booked hair and make up this morning, and half an hour before he was due to pick me up let me down.

No explanation, nothing, no crosswords, no reason at all.

It is made me feel horrendous. I made such an effort to be the best me for him, thinking I was doing a decent thing. And it's made me feel horrendous. Gutted and disappointed to the core.

It's not had a bad experience on here, but this has blown it out the water. It's knocked me far more than I ever thought I could be knocked!!! Help!

I can tell how much effort you put into this, and if it was me, I would want an explanation. There may be a good reason, probably beyond his control and he felt embarrassed, which would explain the lack of excuse. I was invited to a friend's wedding years ago and was going to take my bf. However, her fiancées parents, who had offered to pay for the wedding, pulled out at the last minute. My friend was mortified and had to cut numbers of guests very harshly. My ex was quite understanding at the time, and I went without him. So there could be a reason. Though if it was because he had invited someone else as well, coz he was hedging his bets, and chose her, I would have some strong words for him. I bet he never realised how much you put into this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds like he panicked about how to explain why you know eachother or sumin... To me at least. Tossbag, whatever his reasoning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sooooo........

He needed a plus one to wedding, and last-minute invited me yesterday, for a wedding today.

Nothing in it, just so didn't have to go on his own. I made a massive effort, so I sorted a dress, booked hair and make up this morning, and half an hour before he was due to pick me up let me down.

No explanation, nothing, no crosswords, no reason at all.

It is made me feel horrendous. I made such an effort to be the best me for him, thinking I was doing a decent thing. And it's made me feel horrendous. Gutted and disappointed to the core.

It's not had a bad experience on here, but this has blown it out the water. It's knocked me far more than I ever thought I could be knocked!!! Help!

That's very very strange.

Especially now I've read he's ignoring your messages that isn't on.

Totally understand your frustration and confusion.

This is not a reflection on you!

I do hope you realise that - it's all him!

Big hugs

Ell x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"From social media photos, he went on his own. Which makes even less sense. Still haven't heard from him, just feel more disappointed that I was such a poor judge of character.

But, new day, onwards and upwards. Can't dwell on the scrapheap

I mean what others of said could of happened panicked, how do I explain etc but the just leaving you there is my issue.

You dont do that to anyone it's just plain rude and indecent!

He might be a "good" guy who just made a very very bad choice!

His loss not yours!

Nope your so much better than that!

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By *weetandHungMan
over a year ago

liverpool

"Sooooo........

He needed a plus one to wedding, and last-minute invited me yesterday, for a wedding today.

Nothing in it, just so didn't have to go on his own. I made a massive effort, so I sorted a dress, booked hair and make up this morning, and half an hour before he was due to pick me up let me down.

No explanation, nothing, no crosswords, no reason at all.

It is made me feel horrendous. I made such an effort to be the best me for him, thinking I was doing a decent thing. And it's made me feel horrendous. Gutted and disappointed to the core.

It's not had a bad experience on here, but this has blown it out the water. It's knocked me far more than I ever thought I could be knocked!!! Help!

You didnt do anything wrong at all, dont beat yourself up about a creep like that.

Block him and keep smiling, you will always be better than this guy will ever be, and im pretty sure many many people would be jnterested in meeting you x

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"Already blocked!!!

Some people like playing games.

Some people like having you there hanging.

The fact you've had no explanation or apology makes me suspicious

My guess is he had someone lined up as his plus one, they let him down which is why he asked you (also possibly to make the other person jealous).

They then made up which is why you were then dumped.

You deserve better than this shitty behaviour.

Block and move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow... What a dick.

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By *ensualguy70TV/TS
over a year ago

paisley

He doesnt deserve you at all, good job you found put now what he was like,. You did right with the block button xcc

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By *ungscotsman26Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

His behaviour is so confusing. Invites you the day before, which if he had a plus 1 like you say, but had nobody to attend with so thought I'll ask my female friend rather than go alone. Makes perfect sense.

Then to ask first thing in the morning and check on you seems to me that he wanted you to come, otherwise why bother asking again.

I think he's panicked last minute. Not excusing it Its a shitty thing to do and you are right let down and upset. But for whatever reason he has panicked last minute. Perhaps it was in case people asked questions. But it's not difficult to say met in a bar of whatever you like. He should have had the decency to at least admit it and apologise.

Hope your ok x

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