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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Good morning ALL

I'm Mark (Maverick/Top Gun)

I just wanted to know how long you (ladies/gents) leave your unread messages in your 'sent items'

I'm a little OCD and like to keep on top of my conversations etc. I've been deleting my sent messages which haven't been read after 7 days

Does anybody else do this or am I just a neat freak?

Thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like to keep it tidy too. We don't send messages every day, so it's an as an when needed approach from me.

Poppy.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yeah that's understandable

Thanks Poppy

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By *uckmefackwardsMan
over a year ago

Swindon

It absolutely staggers me that people don't even open mail ! I'm not being big headed for myself but how can people assess what they might be missing out on if they don't even open your interdictory mail ? I just don't get it. Sure they can then reject you, once opened and read (or not) but to not even open your mail.......well it's not even rejection is it ! It's just total ignorance !

To answer your question, I usually leave mine for 3 weeks although I think the 'system' just drops them week 7 anyway.

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By *uckmefackwardsMan
over a year ago

Swindon

Introductory even ! Bloody predictive text

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It absolutely staggers me that people don't even open mail ! I'm not being big headed for myself but how can people assess what they might be missing out on if they don't even open your interdictory mail ? I just don't get it. Sure they can then reject you, once opened and read (or not) but to not even open your mail.......well it's not even rejection is it ! It's just total ignorance !

To answer your question, I usually leave mine for 3 weeks although I think the 'system' just drops them week 7 anyway."

a lot of women, most i imagine, check a profile before opening a message. If there's something there that tells the reader they wouldn't be interested then there's no point opening the message. Also most initial messages, you can read without even opening the message up. It's a far better idea to just delete them the moment theyre sent, then there's nothing there to obsess over.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

That's a good point Dave

I think I agree with you regards ignorance too

I wasn't aware the system removes stuff actually, cheers for the heads up

I may leave mine a little longer than 7 days, see if things change

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks for your input lw

I'd like to think my profile is quite welcoming to all and wouldn't be off putting to any member

That being said you are right regards some messages are so short they dont need to be open but I always make sure there's a little meat on the bone with my introductory messages (and no I don't mean a c*ck pic attached, ha)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The OP raised a great subject here and it will be interesting to see how it pans out

My own answer is, I check to see if the person I have sent message to has logged in since, and if after 5 days its still not been read, it pretty well gives out a clear message of "bugger off you perv, not interested in sex mad men" etc etc etc lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

You Sir (JP) hit the nail on the head

That exact response is what I came up with in my mind on the 7th day of my first unread message

So I took it on the chin and deleted (said individual has never even looked at my profile or messaged which is a shame because I enjoyed the view, ha)

There's nothing wrong with a harmless perv by the way, especially when you're opening message is nice as pie

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I don't bother deleting messages because it takes time. From the first line of the message you can read without opening, you can see if it is worth opening and reading. I would say over 80% of messages I receive are ignored.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You Sir (JP) hit the nail on the head

That exact response is what I came up with in my mind on the 7th day of my first unread message

So I took it on the chin and deleted (said individual has never even looked at my profile or messaged which is a shame because I enjoyed the view, ha)

There's nothing wrong with a harmless perv by the way, especially when you're opening message is nice as pie "

Thanks .........

The other more practical thing to note is that bless them, the female members get 100's if not 1000's of messages so they tend to set privacy to "hide" they can look and decide, without reply

However on a more personal point we ALL should write polite and clear messages to other members and all we ask is the courteous of a reply even if simple "no thanks" - but as we hear s often, men (and occasionally women) are downright rude and abusive

J

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't bother deleting messages because it takes time. From the first line of the message you can read without opening, you can see if it is worth opening and reading. I would say over 80% of messages I receive are ignored. "

I guess if the opening line is either

"meet now" - "facny a shag" - or "can I come over you" - then its no wonder you and other women or men wold ignore the message

The way I look at it is ..........if Nothing in a persons profile dicounts me from contacting them or if in fact their profile pretty well says I tick seem to tick some of their boxes, then I feel comfortable in messaging them - if that makes sense

However I long stopped getting wound up about rejection.........being billy no mates.....feeling despondent ..........alone (in the world of swinging) ..........sad ......lonely.....but ..........still perving lol

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By *r C Miss CCouple
over a year ago

llanelli

Notifications can be a god send. You dont even have to be logged in to read a message, but i suppose this could be a real pain in the ass for the single ladies getting 100's of messages a day.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Blimey Sally

So how many of the remaining 20% actually get a chance to sweep you off your feet?

Ha

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

OP,my advice is never to even look at your sent items.

I've never learnt anything useful from that page - you send messages and either get responses or you don't. "Worrying" about it, to whatever degree, achieves nothing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You Sir (JP) hit the nail on the head

That exact response is what I came up with in my mind on the 7th day of my first unread message

So I took it on the chin and deleted (said individual has never even looked at my profile or messaged which is a shame because I enjoyed the view, ha)

There's nothing wrong with a harmless perv by the way, especially when you're opening message is nice as pie "

People can change privacy settings to not show up on looked at me. Site supporters can so you don't necessarily know if that person viewed you. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Delete after about 20 seconds depending on Wi-Fi connection

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Oh I know that Smiler

This is my 3rd profile/time on here

I have always been a gold site supporter, each and every time (admin can vouch for that) I'm fully aware of that setting and until you just mentioned it I forgot actually, ha

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

A, sharp dressed man

I hear what you're saying but I can assure I never worry about it (some might do)

I'm just a little OCD and don't like seeing a sea of yellow in my sent that's all, ha

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By *uckmefackwardsMan
over a year ago

Swindon


"OP,my advice is never to even look at your sent items.

I've never learnt anything useful from that page - you send messages and either get responses or you don't. "Worrying" about it, to whatever degree, achieves nothing."

And there you have the answer really. Don't even bother looking in the sent folder !

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


" And there you have the answer really. Don't even bother looking in the sent folder ! "

I can't help it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" And there you have the answer really. Don't even bother looking in the sent folder !

I can't help it"

delete every single message the minute you've sent it. very very simple solution.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


" delete every single message the minute you've sent it. very very simple solution."

Funny you say that, if I did/do that whilst it is still shown in yellow, will it still send to the recipient or will the system remove it from their inbox?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" delete every single message the minute you've sent it. very very simple solution.

Funny you say that, if I did/do that whilst it is still shown in yellow, will it still send to the recipient or will the system remove it from their inbox?"

no, they will get the message

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks x

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Blimey Sally

So how many of the remaining 20% actually get a chance to sweep you off your feet?

Ha"

What is funny is all my profile says is "Not here to meet or chat. Just here for the forums" but I still get inundated!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It absolutely staggers me that people don't even open mail ! I'm not being big headed for myself but how can people assess what they might be missing out on if they don't even open your interdictory mail ? I just don't get it. Sure they can then reject you, once opened and read (or not) but to not even open your mail.......well it's not even rejection is it ! It's just total ignorance !

To answer your question, I usually leave mine for 3 weeks although I think the 'system' just drops them week 7 anyway."

I often read an email and then mark it as unread precisely so that the sender doesn't think I opened it and am ignoring them!

Then when I have time, I go back to it and respond (unless they haven't read our profile in which case I just delete and block so they can move on to someone who doesn't care if they actually read what someone took the time to write).

Vixen

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Your pictures are great

You cant fault people for trying

Ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Your pictures are great

You cant fault people for trying

Ha"

If you are talking to me, thanks. I never fault anyone for trying - it's the ones that DON'T try that I "fault"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


" I often read an email and then mark it as unread precisely so that the sender doesn't think I opened it and am ignoring them!

Then when I have time, I go back to it and respond (unless they haven't read our profile in which case I just delete and block so they can move on to someone who doesn't care if they actually read what someone took the time to write).

Vixen

"

Wow until you just mentioned it, I have never used that option

I might try it going forward

Thanks

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Your pictures are great

You cant fault people for trying

Ha

If you are talking to me, thanks. I never fault anyone for trying - it's the ones that DON'T try that I "fault" "

Oops, it was to Sally but your profile looks great too

Ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never bother deleting sent messages...but I clear my inbox every couple of days, purely cos I know I'll never catch up and the mail I want to respond to get lost.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Your pictures are great

You cant fault people for trying

Ha

If you are talking to me, thanks. I never fault anyone for trying - it's the ones that DON'T try that I "fault"

Oops, it was to Sally but your profile looks great too

Ha "

LOL - that's why quoting the message you are referring to is helpful

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I never bother deleting sent messages...but I clear my inbox every couple of days, purely cos I know I'll never catch up and the mail I want to respond to get lost."

Yeah i'm all over the inbox delete

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Your pictures are great

You cant fault people for trying

Ha

If you are talking to me, thanks. I never fault anyone for trying - it's the ones that DON'T try that I "fault"

Oops, it was to Sally but your profile looks great too

Ha

LOL - that's why quoting the message you are referring to is helpful

"

Ok Ok lol

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By *ighland_RoseCouple
over a year ago

Brigadoon

I don't look to see if my sent messages have been read, I just send them and if there is no reply I don't mind.

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By *uckmefackwardsMan
over a year ago

Swindon

As on another thread on here. There should be a thanks but no thanks button. The site makes enough money for this to be implemented.

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By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead

About a week if they have been on here then block. If they can’t be bothered to read it just delete it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I never bother deleting sent messages...but I clear my inbox every couple of days, purely cos I know I'll never catch up and the mail I want to respond to get lost."

Same here, I hate doing it.

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By *iversong321Woman
over a year ago

Preston/Merseyside


"It absolutely staggers me that people don't even open mail ! I'm not being big headed for myself but how can people assess what they might be missing out on if they don't even open your interdictory mail ? I just don't get it. Sure they can then reject you, once opened and read (or not) but to not even open your mail.......well it's not even rejection is it ! It's just total ignorance !

To answer your question, I usually leave mine for 3 weeks although I think the 'system' just drops them week 7 anyway."

Some messages are one work or a sentence, nothing on the profile. That tells me all I need to know. Either block delete or let them fall off the end.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax


"It absolutely staggers me that people don't even open mail ! I'm not being big headed for myself but how can people assess what they might be missing out on if they don't even open your interdictory mail ? I just don't get it. Sure they can then reject you, once opened and read (or not) but to not even open your mail.......well it's not even rejection is it ! It's just total ignorance !

To answer your question, I usually leave mine for 3 weeks although I think the 'system' just drops them week 7 anyway.

a lot of women, most i imagine, check a profile before opening a message. If there's something there that tells the reader they wouldn't be interested then there's no point opening the message. Also most initial messages, you can read without even opening the message up. It's a far better idea to just delete them the moment theyre sent, then there's nothing there to obsess over."

First thing i do

If they haven't read what I'm looking for I delete.

Miss

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