FabSwingers.com forum: Some advice on what makes a good profile

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Like the title says. Been here for a few weeks, I'm literally looking to make some friends as I've just got out of a bad relationship and she's knocked my confidence quite a bit.

I know I'm not the best looking guy in the world, so I kinda think that's the main reason I get overlooked.

Also what makes a good first message? Even though I generally read the profiles and use that to make conversation, I very rarely get any replies and I always send a face pic. I know how to be respectful, I'm not gonna be a dick to people.

I get it, the women on here will get thousands of messages a day so mine will get lost in the fray, but it'd be nice to know what I can do to stand out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We like a message where the guy introduces himself, gives an idea of what he is looking for and what he can potentially bring to the table for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Chances are you have already caught someone's eye and have been added to a few hot lists. A lot of ladies will have viewed your profile in stealth mode (so you may be getting views, but you'll never know). As you have no veris yet, your watchers will keep an eye on you until they see that someone has verified you, or not.

Key point, you need verifications. Once you start getting them you'll find things may take a turn for the better.

What I recommend, look at the meets/events section and also look through the clubs that are in your area and go to a one. Obviously go to one that let's young guys in solo. It's a bold move I know, but if you're serious and you do it, (and manage to get veris out of it), you'll soon get yourself a small network of new friends to hang out with.

I've recently been to a few clubs myself and honestly they were nothing like I had imagined, and are quite possibly some of the most chilled out fun places I've been to in the UK!

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/08/17 18:32:18]

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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Ok dude, harsh reality check time (hold onto your hats folks).

You're not bad looking, that's a lovely grin you're rocking there.

Take the self-deprecation off your profile as women like confidence. Shyness is adorable, but insult yourself and women will be more inclined to believe it.

You've put down some interests outside of sex - great! I mean seriously, I want to be able to talk to someone and I can't hang a whole conversation off the size of someone's schlong. Plus, it makes you more relatable.

You've got some good facepics, have a look at some of the successful male forumites and the kind of pics they have going on to - some arty stuff out here man. Even Whatsapp has a set of filters nowadays so take some great ones to dress your shop window with.

Then yeah, it's time to hit the local clubs and events. Get your face...and, erm...other bits known.

Once you've got a bunch of lovely veris, women will be more inclined to meet.

The pros of internet based hookups is that you get to know the meets beforehand. It's not like rocking up to a bar and trying to find out over the thumping bass whether or not you're compatible - you actually get to talk through stuff. The cons include not getting meets very often, unlike your local meat market on a d*unken Friday night.

I can say that most of the meets I've had from here have been heart-stoppingly amazing. I rarely meet. I want it to be exhilarating and breathtaking. I want to be soaked in anticipation for weeks before it actually happens. The hunt, the chase...this place works for me

But for every one that actually goes somewhere, there's a hundred conversations that fizzle out (probably due to my inability to keep them straight) and another five hundred that I don't even answer.

So it's not your face that's stopping you (pinkie promise), it's just this place being what it is. Enjoy it, but don't expect anything

. And come hang with us forumites...we're crazy and awesome!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks, that really means a lot to me. I'll take your advice on board and make some changes. I'm worried about socials though. I have social anxiety and I find it hard meeting new people (weird right), but I am trying to use my new job (cleaner at Fenwicks) to talk to my co-workers and manage with my anxiety.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks, that really means a lot to me. I'll take your advice on board and make some changes. I'm worried about socials though. I have social anxiety and I find it hard meeting new people (weird right), but I am trying to use my new job (cleaner at Fenwicks) to talk to my co-workers and manage with my anxiety."
If you have anxiety problems and complex problems this place is probably not for you x ...Female replying

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's the reason I wanna be here. So I can get over it. I'm okay when I meet people I have something in common with, it's just the initial messaging because I never know what to say. Once the convo starts flowing I'm usually alright.

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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Ok, that's a good idea actually - this place can be brutal (always remember that when someone has taken a piece out of you - it's more likely them than you.)

If you can remember that, you should be ok. Building confidence up online can be a great way to take it back into the real world.

Getting someone to chat to you will be tough, so keep an eye on the forum threads, jump in if you see one you like and don't worry if no-one acknowledges what you say - it happens to all of us on here!

Welcome aboard mister!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks, I thought it would be quite intimidating at first, but it's actually really warm and welcoming. Thank you.

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By *reb46Man
over a year ago

torquay

If they ridicule you and your polite then it's them that have a problem so don't let it worry you and move on to someone whose worthwhile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Like the title says. Been here for a few weeks, I'm literally looking to make some friends as I've just got out of a bad relationship and she's knocked my confidence quite a bit.

I know I'm not the best looking guy in the world, so I kinda think that's the main reason I get overlooked.

I get it, the women on here will get thousands of messages a day so mine will get lost in the fray, but it'd be nice to know what I can do to stand out."

I've not even looked. If you can write like that.. then do it more often. Flirt with these women.. online. They love it really. So long as you're respectful and honest.. you've got a fighting chance. Many other people watch and read what's going on.. Looking from afar.

You'll soon pick up the profile after that.

Big dick thing sounds arrogant when you say it like that. Saying you aren't worried about the size of your cock.. is much better than Ivor Biggun

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Big dick thing? What do you mean?

That is literally how I write all my messages, I try to pick things out from profiles and use them to start an opening message, try to build a rapport.

Flirting? I'm not so good at it, but if something stands out in a picture such as tattoos I'll say they're nice. I do genuinely like tattoos so I'm being sincere when I say that.

I'll try and figure out my approach. Be respectful, but charming, teasing. I'll give it a shot. Thanks dude.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Big dick thing? What do you mean?

That is literally how I write all my messages, I try to pick things out from profiles and use them to start an opening message, try to build a rapport.

Flirting? I'm not so good at it, but if something stands out in a picture such as tattoos I'll say they're nice. I do genuinely like tattoos so I'm being sincere when I say that.

I'll try and figure out my approach. Be respectful, but charming, teasing. I'll give it a shot. Thanks dude."

You are young, but you will learn

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Fair enough, Obi Wan haha.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Big dick thing? What do you mean?

That is literally how I write all my messages, I try to pick things out from profiles and use them to start an opening message, try to build a rapport.

Flirting? I'm not so good at it, but if something stands out in a picture such as tattoos I'll say they're nice. I do genuinely like tattoos so I'm being sincere when I say that.

I'll try and figure out my approach. Be respectful, but charming, teasing. I'll give it a shot. Thanks dude."

Sorry.. t think I've got the dick thing confused.. Just go on forum and join in.. have an opinion.. stick your neck on the line.. grow some cojones and ask some interesting questions - even if you know the answer.. they get bored and like fresh meat that throws itself in

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oh, right okay, yeah that makes sense. Thanks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with what obi wan said....join conversations in the forums, have a laugh, get to know people, that way your personality comes out. Dont bullshit and don't lie, you'll have a laugh, anything else you get is just sprinkles on top.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

OP not much more to add to the already excellent advice given - especially from Elcee - only things I'd say are consider losing the cock pic - to be honest it's not the best pic and a lot of ladies don't like them anyway.

Maybe take a few body shots that show off your torso etc.

Also suggest losing the "I don't bite" joke at the end - is so clichéd.

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By *otSoNewWalesCoupleCouple
over a year ago

South Wales

I agree with some posters above. It even comes down to the username people pick for themselves. 'HugeCock' and stuff like that just make the guy seem arrogant.

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