FabSwingers.com forum: Feedback...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hey guys and girls were new on here.

Been let down on 4 occasions this week and I'm sick of hearing that people are too intimidated by us because we're attractive.

By no means do we think we look like half of the guys and girls on here, were a down to earth couple looking for some fun with a female for our first time.

Can anyone have a look at our profile and maybe give us a little feedback to see where were good wrong.

Much appreciated

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can see how the text would read a little intimidating.

Your play dynamic would put a large section of people off too. Especially couples who like play between all parties.

That's not to say it's 'wrong'. You set your boundaries and stick to them but you'll find the amount of people who fit with that, diminishes.

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By *.1079Man
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

I see what people mean you are just to attractive

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah we're open to different things and will consider other things at a later date but to "dip our toes in" so to speak we really need to find out how adventurous the wife is with other females x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Now can people be too attractive

The wife is shit hot I know that. But we're normal down to earth people. 3 kids, not perfect at all. It's annoying how many times we hear it in messages and get shot down with some unbelievably attractive people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now can people be too attractive

But saying to someone 'the wife is shit hot' and similar, can be intimidating to some.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe write a little more about what you two are looking for. At the moment it's almost like you mention it as an after thought.

With a little more information people would know what they're getting in to before hand.

Also: there's a lot of women and couples' profiles on here that are actually guys so that might be half the problem

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah we've discovered that lol. Usually wife does the talking so I sit back and leave her too it as it makes people more comfortable speaking with the fem. We have spoken to people together too and we've had meets lines up only to be left waiting and ended up fucking each other all night lol

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

"Now can people be too attractive

What some people find too attractive, others won't, so I'm sure there's someone out there for you guys. It's usually people who lack confidence, will say that. We're old but happy in our bodies, so this wouldn't be an issue for us. Personally think your profile is fine and good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're only looking for a female to join you, along with lots of other couples. You come across as loving yourselves to be honest and any female who is not "Shit hot" or attractive is not going to want to meet you.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

It's only been 7 days since you joined, and you're looking for a single female in a fairly small age bracket, probably the hardest thing to find on here. Also the fact you're not meet verified might put people off. It can be intimidating for a single female to meet a couple so bear that in mind when chatting to them. And good luck

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Cheers guys all feedback taken as constructive so we'll work on our profile. I'll be honest were not looking for "shit hot" were looking for someone who we both find attractive yes. We are new to this so it's all a learning curve and we'll adjust to suit

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"Hey guys and girls were new on here.

Been let down on 4 occasions this week and I'm sick of hearing that people are too intimidated by us because we're attractive.

By no means do we think we look like half of the guys and girls on here, were a down to earth couple looking for some fun with a female for our first time.

Can anyone have a look at our profile and maybe give us a little feedback to see where were good wrong.

Much appreciated

Hi Guys, having looked at your profile. I suspect that the folk who've let you down have possibly been wasting your time on purpose. The type of play you are seeking is almost the Holy Grail of fab land.

I also suspect that many bi ladies would feel that their position in the arrangement would just be that of a performing monkey.

Anyone who's going to tell you that their not interested because you are "Too Attractive" is just letting you down gently... if they found you "That" attractive they'd be patting themselves on the back for how well they've done. And to be perfectly honest, In "my opinion" although your Mrs is attractive I wouldn't say exceptionally so (No offence)...

Cal

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

No offence taken we all have preferences. Yes it is a little hard finding what were looking for but we don't want to be put off from trying anything new by jumping in at the deep end and not liking it so we both agreed to take it steady and start with something we both want to try.

I'm sure we'll get there in the end we just wanted to make sure our profile wasn't intimidating in any way. If people met us they'd realise were far from perfect and are as normal as your next door neighbour.

We're not aliens

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"No offence taken we all have preferences. Yes it is a little hard finding what were looking for but we don't want to be put off from trying anything new by jumping in at the deep end and not liking it so we both agreed to take it steady and start with something we both want to try.

We're not aliens

You're right to stick to your principles, ultimately I believe the key to swinging successfully is being honest and true to yourselves, and to be respectful of others doing the same.

Have you considered going to clubs, we've always found that there are more chances to meet Single ladies in clubs.

Cal

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By *s_bettyboopWoman
over a year ago

-3

I think you guys would do well on the club scene and will find it easier for the scenario you are looking for. Try Xtasia or chameleons they are local to you and give you a wider pool of people to find what you seek!

Good luck and welcome to the forums.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

We have discussed it but being newbies to the scene we wasn't too sure what to expect, we've looked at xtacia and feel more at ease after reading up a little more about it so we may give that a try. Thanks guys

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By *s_bettyboopWoman
over a year ago

-3

"We have discussed it but being newbies to the scene we wasn't too sure what to expect, we've looked at xtacia and feel more at ease after reading up a little more about it so we may give that a try. Thanks guys

Yes I'd say Xtasia would be probably the best place to visit first as its nightclub themed and you don't have to dress down to towels or underwear. Check the website out and pick a couples and single ladies night maybe. X

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

We took our first steps into swinging through clubs, and personally found it easier than private meets. When you attend a club, nobody has any expectation that you're going to have sex with them. You can just wander round and watch, chat with people, experience the atmosphere and not play with anyone... or you could meet the perfect accompaniment to your evening and have the night if your lives.

I,d choose a club night when there's no single guys though to reduce the number of men you have to turn away.

Cal

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

Maybe soften tone of profile text to say we are looking for a lovely single lady to join us, that is either bi or straight. Z likes to play with the ladies, and more than happy to play straight and watch s enjoy the ladies as well. Both of us enjoy pleasure together, and therefore don't meet separately

Same messsage but not as hash tone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From your profile:

*No males allowed...hubby wants him to be the only cock allowed to feel my pussy and ass so don't ask!*

I would never play with a couple that has this in their profile - because it is a sure sign of insecurity in the relationship. If he gets to play with other pussys - she should have the opportunity to play with other cocks. Double standards are a straight up turn off for me. The small pool of Unicorns that fit your profile request just got even smaller, because I'm sure there are other Unicorns who stay away from this situation also.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

She put that in there no me Lol, she finds it a turn on to watch me with other women. For me I'm not at that stage yet... like I say in time maybe.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe soften tone of profile text to say we are looking for a lovely single lady to join us, that is either bi or straight. Z likes to play with the ladies, and more than happy to play straight and watch s enjoy the ladies as well. Both of us enjoy pleasure together, and therefore don't meet separately

Same messsage but not as hash tone.

Thanks mate I've added that. Cheers buddy.

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By *heaspieswingerMan
over a year ago

Peak District

People find you intimidating because you're so attractive...

Wish we'd been told that!

Give it time. People are fickle folks and we all have are own types. Try a club, you'll probably have better luck in real life.

As an aside, we're not looking for couples but - if we were, we'd wink you and hope we were lucky, and unless our heads suddenly fell off, we'd not let you down!

Keep at it and good things will happen. Just don't get your hopes up for a single woman. They're called unicorns for a reason

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By *heaspieswingerMan
over a year ago

Peak District

"From your profile:

*No males allowed...hubby wants him to be the only cock allowed to feel my pussy and ass so don't ask!*

This struck a chord with us too.

*moves to Claremont*

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"You're only looking for a female to join you, along with lots of other couples. You come across as loving yourselves to be honest and any female who is not "Shit hot" or attractive is not going to want to meet you. "

No it's the wife who is 'shit hot'.....such descriptions would put me off for definite!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hence why I don't do the talking and only post on forums... I don't have a way with words I find my wife highly attractive and id tell anyone that, maybe that's wrong in this scene but I'm not wrong for thinking my wife is gorgeous x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Wife here... to clarify he didn't put shit hot on our profile that was on here lmao! Thank you for advice and we have decided to go to xtasia tonight eeekkk nervous lol any tips?? Xxx

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By *heaspieswingerMan
over a year ago

Peak District

"Wife here... to clarify he didn't put shit hot on our profile that was on here lmao! Thank you for advice and we have decided to go to xtasia tonight eeekkk nervous lol any tips?? Xxx"

Yes, do it!

Seriously, as we're sure others will confirm, going through the door is the hardest (no pun intended) thing to do. Yes, it's scary, yes, people will approach you and ask to play. If you simply say no thanks, you'll not be pressured.

The best thing about a club is that you'll meet some great people - and people who'll give you great advice.

Just FYI - Mr has been swinging for 17 years now, Mrs for 5. Between us we've pretty much broken everyone of our self-imposed rules at some stage or another. If that happens to you (and if you find the lifestyle is for you, we're willing to bet it'll happen!), don't fret. Talk about it on the way home.

If at the time anything starts happening that your not comfortable with, simply say you're not comfortable.

In this lifestyle communication is everything x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would be interested to know what your idea of being let down is OP, if its just people saying we wont meet because of XYZ then that's not being let down that's them having a preference

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I would be interested to know what your idea of being let down is OP, if its just people saying we wont meet because of XYZ then that's not being let down that's them having a preference"

Being let down is.. I'm on the way be about half hour.

And us waiting 1.5 hours before going bed and fucling each other lmao x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Anyway we went xtasia has a superb night... Club scene is definitely more us. Met a few lovely couples and had a bit of fun in the play rooms. Off to an after party at a hotel room now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyway we went xtasia has a superb night... Club scene is definitely more us. Met a few lovely couples and had a bit of fun in the play rooms. Off to an after party at a hotel room now

Winner winner chicken dinner

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"Anyway we went xtasia has a superb night... Club scene is definitely more us. Met a few lovely couples and had a bit of fun in the play rooms. Off to an after party at a hotel room now

Great to know that we helped.

Cal

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the advice guys and girls. We actually let our hair down a little and found it much more comfortable. We went with the intention of finding a lady but ended up in a situation with a couple and found it very comfortable, more of a girl on girl while hubbies stuck to their own lady.

Didn't think we'd enjoy that but the moment took us there and we really enjoyed it

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By *s_bettyboopWoman
over a year ago

-3

Brilliant glad you had fun at Xtasia!

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