FabSwingers.com forum: Why don't I get attention

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Let's try that again that didn't work I'm Simon, now my question is to every girl out there who is from the North from the East from the south from the west from all over the world what is actually wrong with me? I don't seem to get anywhere I will send a message and all I get is not interested, not my cup of tea, it's like whoever i msg they're not interested what it's like whoever iMessage they're not interested what do I have to do?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Let's try that again that didn't work I'm Simon, now my question is to every girl out there who is from the North from the East from the south from the west from all over the world what is actually wrong with me? I don't seem to get anywhere I will send a message and all I get is not interested, not my cup of tea, it's like whoever i msg they're not interested what it's like whoever iMessage they're not interested what do I have to do?"

Keep at it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Keep at it

perhaps have a look at profiles of single males who do well on here? It's your "shop window", so to speak.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I just want to say whoever I cannot reply back to whoever does leaving common I just want to say thank you for your tip and your advice I will always take it on board I might just have to admit to myself that I I'm not needed on a website like this

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

Although you haven't asked for profile help, this may be where the problem lies.

Dissing other guys is not a good look

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By *exycouplesswingCouple
over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

Try smiling in your pics instead of the gangster hardman look that you currently have going on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask for profile help?

Sure you'll get lots of hints & tips then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dissing other guys is not a good look"

^this.

You won't get very far with this approach.

Negativity is unattractive. Try being more positive. Try selling yourself rather than putting others down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wait for a message off someone

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By *wo-GoodCouple
over a year ago

South London

Try smiling in your pics. Don't take yourself too seriously in your profile. Try and show you'd be fun company

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few things to remember are -

this is not a sex site

Don't take it or yourself too seriously

Smile more... people respond better if you are smiling

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Look guys let's get something straight I am not trying to take the piss out of any of you for me when I say that I'm a genuine guy I just know that a lot of guys on here and not genuine and they do to take the women for granted now I know that this isn't a sex site for me personally I would like to chat and get to know someone first instead of just jumping on them at the word goal

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And anyway for the bottom of my heart I got told to write in the forum because I will probably get more response then I do on messages and guess what they were right anyway I wish you all the best of luck on here I'm sure you all don't need it take it easy look after yourselves and play safe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The guys that do well on here have interesting profiles that hold a woman's attention, muscly bodies and massive cocks. . The first is so important, women are turned on by what they read and their imaginations being aroused. The second is quite obvious, who wouldnt to touch an Adonis? The third is also fairly obvious.

It's also worth mentioning that this is technically not a sex site and there's lots of profiles I read which would be better suited to porn and escort agencies. It's more about swinging, which is an alternative lifestyle based on shared interests and having social as well as physical connections. Nobody wants to shag a robot, do they?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't worry pal we are all getting the same non responders too lol

Don't let them grind you down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The guys that do well on here have interesting profiles that hold a woman's attention, muscly bodies and massive cocks. . The first is so important, women are turned on by what they read and their imaginations being aroused. The second is quite obvious, who wouldnt to touch an Adonis? The third is also fairly obvious.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

Keep trying you've already got two verifications one of which is by meet so you're off to a better start than most as on average it can take around 6months for most guys to get that kind of start on here

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"And anyway for the bottom of my heart I got told to write in the forum because I will probably get more response then I do on messages and guess what they were right anyway I wish you all the best of luck on here I'm sure you all don't need it take it easy look after yourselves and play safe

At the bottom of each message is a "reply in forum +quote" button it quotes the post so we can see who you're replying to.

Are you sending messages to people whose requirements you fit? Could you get to a social or a club?

Have a look at how you've presented yourself in your profile. Its full of what you're not. Rewrite it to say what you are and make it positive.

Good luck.

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By *immyb1985Man
over a year ago

bridgend

Change the pictures on your profile. Look like your either trying to look hard or gay.

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By *reedy_for_funCouple
over a year ago

My House

The very first pic with the beard would put me off instantly. A very unattractive picture whereas the next is fine.

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By *xploringThisWorldMan
over a year ago

collier row

I beg to differ.

Muscles and big cocks aren't that expected at all.

I've done fine on a few profiles on here. . And I am neither of those !

OP - just being interesting towards ladies is all you really need. If I can meet gorgeous couples etc, anyone can !

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By *ear norwichCouple
over a year ago

"Are we there yet"

Trout pout pose ???? doesn't work on women .... So it's no chance on guys for us ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm far from a fab guru but personally I find that as a single male the best approach is to just have a laid back attitude but invest time in what you write in a message and have your profile confirm what you say in mails. I notice alot of people will check your bio before responding and if it doesn't match what you say in your mail then they are less likely to respond. Plus the last thing you want to do is come across as a single man just wanting to fuck. Although it's a site for swinging a lot of people do like to see substance and a bit of humour ( depending on what they say they are looking for of course). Forums are always a good way to be noticed as people pick up on how you conduct yourself etc.

That's just my own personal view of fab though. I'm sure women in particular will understand better than me about how a male should approach them.

Tez

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Keep trying you've already got two verifications one of which is by meet so you're off to a better start than most as on average it can take around 6months for most guys to get that kind of start on here

"
then u get called a male whore

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By *xploringThisWorldMan
over a year ago

collier row

"I'm far from a fab guru but personally I find that as a single male the best approach is to just have a laid back attitude but invest time in what you write in a message and have your profile confirm what you say in mails. I notice alot of people will check your bio before responding and if it doesn't match what you say in your mail then they are less likely to respond. Plus the last thing you want to do is come across as a single man just wanting to fuck. Although it's a site for swinging a lot of people do like to see substance and a bit of humour ( depending on what they say they are looking for of course). Forums are always a good way to be noticed as people pick up on how you conduct yourself etc.

That's just my own personal view of fab though. I'm sure women in particular will understand better than me about how a male should approach them.

Tez

Forums are not a good judge of character I'm afraid. There's plenty of virtue signallers and people that act like 13 year olds on these forums.

I've found that most of the cool people treat the forums as just a laugh, they don't take them seriously at all. Usually the people virtue signalling and saying really cheesy and lame stuff are nightmares for meets.

If you are socially awkward on a forum, you will be socially awkward in the flesh. It's pretty much hand in hand.

My advice would be to communicate with people on the forum that are not their to bumlick other users (desperate for attention).

Most of the time, people that have wit and humor on the forum are the ones to engage.

Ignore the sheep and follow the wolves.

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

I like fun men, the mwan and moody look kinda puts me off. This is about sexy fun

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

Mean....ha ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Exploring, doesn't that enforce my point that you can better judge someone by how they are in forums though?

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By *rGenuineMan
over a year ago

Purley

You're a single guy. There are three million of us on this site compared to 23 genuine, real, attractive couples.

And you're not black.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bit ranty

There are thousands of other similar guys to choose from

- Mrs. J -

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Exploring, doesn't that enforce my point that you can better judge someone by how they are in forums though?"

I bloody well hope not as a lot of the men on these forums come across as socially inept loners, who wouldn't even know what to do with a woman if they ever got the chance of actually meeting one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn't worry to much there are 100's of guys probably on fab in same position. Problem is lots join experting to meet loads of women within first few weeks. You've probably already worked it out the women do hold the cards on fab. I can honestly see what your saying about been genuine tho as unfortunately some do spoil it for guys on here. Claiming been single when married been abusive to women when get rejected to mention a couple. Not sure if you've thought about it but maybe look into going to some organised socials. We were at the Barnsley social on Saturday had a great night and were some single guys there. Least your putting your face out there and meeting people then. Personally drink and a chat in my view goes a long way and just think how many women mass delete messages maybe deleting yours without knowing. Well hopefully you find what your after on fab and keep that chin up fella

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By *xploringThisWorldMan
over a year ago

collier row

"Exploring, doesn't that enforce my point that you can better judge someone by how they are in forums though?"

I understand your reasoning but it's flawed.

Most of us DO NOT use the forums as a way to setup new meets etc.

We do this via profiles and personal messages.

I for example have had loads of meets on this and different profiles. . And all I do in the forums is poke fun.

Remember as well attention seekers often use the forums as a way to get appreciated.

My argument is that if your ego requires that much soothing I'm not interested.

So as such you cannot simply judge someone by their forum statements. . It will be misleading.

But you are correct I suppose to an extent.

I can see the socially awkward people smile away. . They usually type Mmmmmmmm in a post.

So cringeworthy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Exploring, doesn't that enforce my point that you can better judge someone by how they are in forums though?

I understand your reasoning but it's flawed.

Most of us DO NOT use the forums as a way to setup new meets etc.

We do this via profiles and personal messages.

I for example have had loads of meets on this and different profiles. . And all I do in the forums is poke fun.

Remember as well attention seekers often use the forums as a way to get appreciated.

My argument is that if your ego requires that much soothing I'm not interested.

So as such you cannot simply judge someone by their forum statements. . It will be misleading.

But you are correct I suppose to an extent.

I can see the socially awkward people smile away. . They usually type Mmmmmmmm in a post.

So cringeworthy

This is my point, you can tell who wants attention and such and I simply meant that most of the people I speak to generally came from extending a forum conversation beyond the forum and just generally chatting. Then of course you begin to chat to people that if not for the forums you would not have spoken to wether it be through slightly more distance than either of you initially preferred or you both didn't foresee getting on as well as you do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jungle guru here

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By *xploringThisWorldMan
over a year ago

collier row

"Exploring, doesn't that enforce my point that you can better judge someone by how they are in forums though?

I understand your reasoning but it's flawed.

Most of us DO NOT use the forums as a way to setup new meets etc.

We do this via profiles and personal messages.

I for example have had loads of meets on this and different profiles. . And all I do in the forums is poke fun.

Remember as well attention seekers often use the forums as a way to get appreciated.

My argument is that if your ego requires that much soothing I'm not interested.

So as such you cannot simply judge someone by their forum statements. . It will be misleading.

But you are correct I suppose to an extent.

I can see the socially awkward people smile away. . They usually type Mmmmmmmm in a post.

So cringeworthy

As I said for me. .I don't use the forums for that at all. All my meets are from finding someone's profile/ or they found mine and starting up a real adult conversation.

The forums always feel like you are talking to little kids when I see the flirting going on, it's pretty lame.

Couple that with chis like posts about snog marry avoid. . And you have a recipe for ego driven people.

They are not my cup of tea at all.

I prefer people who actually have interesting things to say.. . I'd rather debate my way into someone's bed with interesting conversation rather than public forum flirting.

Each to their own I guess !

But it doesn't stop me pointing out these people in forums for my pleasure. . . Mwahah !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If i was nearer I would chat with you OP. Nice photos just less negative comments on the profile and bingo. Maybe some women are too far to meet. Are you looking for those who live local?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Better going paying for it

only joking good luck pal

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By *lirty-CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Bexley

Lots of guys just send us random messages having not bothered to read any of our profile first to find out what we're looking for. We get so many that we've actually given up replying to them now. If they spent less time doing this and more time reading profiles to see who's looking for what they're offering they'd probably get a better response. We've clearly stated we are looking for a 6ft plus guy aged 35-50, who's a non-smoker has no tattoos and lives/works close to where we live. We still get lots of messages from guys who don't match any of those requirements so why would we bother to reply to them. Checking their profiles usually reveals a lot of cock shots and not a lot else so they're not doing themselves any favours.

There are so many guys here that it's hard for decent guys to get noticed but writing a good profile and being selective about whom they approach is a very good start.

Good luck OPx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Clubs!! most single birds go in clubs these days a lot safer for them in this day and age apparently but but obviously a few do arrange private social type of meet if you like drinking cost a coffee good luck to all singls

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By *anxmann55Man
over a year ago

Douglas Isle of man.......

What he needs is a good man behind him show him how its really done you can never stop learning

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By *xploringThisWorldMan
over a year ago

collier row

"What he needs is a good man behind him show him how its really done you can never stop learning

A good man behind him Hehe

Sounds nice and pervy

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By *atEvolutionCouple
over a year ago

atlantisEVOLUTION. Stoke FREE ENTRANCE ALL WEEKEND

You don't have a profile! Nothing not even one picture.

Hardly a surprise really.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You don't have a profile! Nothing not even one picture.

Hardly a surprise really.

He did have but hes having a revamp. Hes a gorgeous guy and had great photos up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't want an Adonis nor do I want a massive cock.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've had a meet and chatted to a couple of people over cam? What are you expecting, a shag a day?

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By *atEvolutionCouple
over a year ago

atlantisEVOLUTION. Stoke FREE ENTRANCE ALL WEEKEND

You don't have a profile! Nothing not even one picture.

Hardly a surprise really.

He did have but hes having a revamp. Hes a gorgeous guy and had great photos up"

Ah! That explains it then. Well I wait with baited breath then lol.

Cat X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I just want to say thank you very much to the guys and girls who have actually took their time to reply back to this forum message. I am going to upload new pictures today and I will be updating my profile to the best that I can and we shall see how it works out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just because someone replies on the forum, it doesn't mean they want an inbox full of messages FYI.

If you seriously have to ask why you're getting no interest then you possibly shouldn't be here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you tried putting a pair of pants on your head, stuffing a pencil up your nose and running around Tesco shouting "wibble" loudly?? You'll get loads of attention then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have you tried putting a pair of pants on your head, stuffing a pencil up your nose and running around Tesco shouting "wibble" loudly?? You'll get loads of attention then

He'd be better doing that than his current offering

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Some of you people so nice

kick a man when he's down woo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some of you people so nice

kick a man when he's down woo"

If this site m,akes you down then take a break. Its just a bit of fun never ti be taken seriously.

Write about what you're looking for, why you're here, what you can offer getting your personality and humour accross. Add some tasteful pics, face if you can, or torso, bum, looking smart in a suit etc, easy on the graphic cock pics. Get known in the forum and look for organised social meets near you. You get out of this what you put in, as with everything in life. Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some of you people so nice

kick a man when he's down woo"

Dramatic.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Trust me in the line of work that I do I was being sarcastic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've had a meet and chatted to a couple of people over cam? What are you expecting, a shag a day?"
Mrs Robinson your pretty for lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't want an Adonis nor do I want a massive cock."

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