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Anxiety

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Evening all.

Just wondered if there are any other people on here with anxiety/social anxiety? I've had it for around 7 years now, sometimes it effects me with meets, really want to go to a club but quite anxious about it. Went to a party/gathering with 3 other couples and a girl from here I was seeing at the time and it was good, but anxiety definitely affected me at times. (Previously on here as rubicon_28)

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By *haneleviMan
over a year ago

Kidderminster


"Evening all.

Just wondered if there are any other people on here with anxiety/social anxiety? I've had it for around 7 years now, sometimes it effects me with meets, really want to go to a club but quite anxious about it. Went to a party/gathering with 3 other couples and a girl from here I was seeing at the time and it was good, but anxiety definitely affected me at times. (Previously on here as rubicon_28)"

I suffer with it. On and off usually. Had it since my mid teens now. Only been here 2 weeks, but it's effected me also. Has always gotten in the way with dating aswell. I see people talking about clubs and meets and would love to get up and go but my mind panics at the idea.

Like with dating etc it's something I'd have to work myself up to, rather then spur of the moment

Definitely not alone man haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yup. Hence why I'm not meeting atm. Tbh not sure I will again but time will tell. I just stay in the forums. Xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" yup. Hence why I'm not meeting atm. Tbh not sure I will again but time will tell. I just stay in the forums. Xxx"

I'm only here for the forums as well. Hope you feel better soon xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" yup. Hence why I'm not meeting atm. Tbh not sure I will again but time will tell. I just stay in the forums. Xxx

I'm only here for the forums as well. Hope you feel

better soon xx"

Thanks you. Got an anxiety headache so I'll be in bed in a min n Im staying there! xxx

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By *onforming_deviantWoman
over a year ago

Hull

*waves* I do lmao I actually have CPTSD which throws up its own challenges in socials and meets but if I'm going to find anyone who understands or respects my needs it's going to be here. People are upfront... Quite ungraciously at times and I find that reassuring. Knowing someone only wants a fuck removes soooo much of the unknown.... Then its just the trust hurdle :S

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anxiety is something I suffer from as well. Not really about meeting so much 1 on 1. But in a group or wanting of talk on the phone I'm not great at

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By *elnkazCouple
over a year ago

cheshire

Luckily I havent suffered any anxiety for some time .for me that is down to medication, cbt and change In my life. Good luck op and others suffering with it. There is help out there.....kaz

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I know what you mean about dating, I went on a date in December and felt sick for a whole day before, so damn nervous to the point where I didn't think I'd be able to go...It was an amazing date in the end but alas no second one yet.

And yeh the posts where people are like, lets go to a club tonight or spur of the moment meet, my mind responds in the same way. Would love to but most of the time it talks me out of it lol.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


" yup. Hence why I'm not meeting atm. Tbh not sure I will again but time will tell. I just stay in the forums. Xxx"

Hopefully you get to meet again if that's what you want to do I had a few meets when I was on here a few years ago and ended up dating someone from the site. We went to a small swingers party but I felt so anxious all the time.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"*waves* I do lmao I actually have CPTSD which throws up its own challenges in socials and meets but if I'm going to find anyone who understands or respects my needs it's going to be here. People are upfront... Quite ungraciously at times and I find that reassuring. Knowing someone only wants a fuck removes soooo much of the unknown.... Then its just the trust hurdle :S"

What's CPTSD? I should google it but I feel it's better asking you. Yeh I figured this was somewhere that people would be more understand too. It's why I did the post and it's nice to be able to chat to others openly about it. Do you find it hard to trust people? I always find myself second guessing wether a girl actually fancies me or not.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Anxiety is something I suffer from as well. Not really about meeting so much 1 on 1. But in a group or wanting of talk on the phone I'm not great at "

Dude I'm the same...I'm rubbish at talking on the phone, wether it be someone on here, a friend or a number I don't know. Most of the time I'll ignore it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suffer from anxiety, very badly at times. I have found the best way to deal with it on fab and when meeting is to pretend im someone else who is more confident. I can do that for a while

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Luckily I havent suffered any anxiety for some time .for me that is down to medication, cbt and change In my life. Good luck op and others suffering with it. There is help out there.....kaz"

Cheers Kaz good to hear you haven't suffered with it in a long time.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

OP there have been lots of threads around this topic so you are definitely not alone

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I suffer from anxiety, very badly at times. I have found the best way to deal with it on fab and when meeting is to pretend im someone else who is more confident. I can do that for a while "

Sounds like a good technique...Sometimes I'm fine with it all but when it's playing up and feels like it's taking over I'll have to try that and see how it goes.

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town


"Evening all.

Just wondered if there are any other people on here with anxiety/social anxiety? I've had it for around 7 years now, sometimes it effects me with meets, really want to go to a club but quite anxious about it. Went to a party/gathering with 3 other couples and a girl from here I was seeing at the time and it was good, but anxiety definitely affected me at times. (Previously on here as rubicon_28)"

Yes I suffer mildly with anxiety since 2012

Hate crowds, hate shopping, only can go to the gym about 11 when there isn't hardly anyone there

Can't have lots of people around me

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

OP you might want to look into CBT, Cognitive Behavior Therapy.

The situations you might find yourself in are fairly normal, you're not backpacking through a nasty jungle with nothing on

What's 'wrong' is how you perceive the situations. And if you can learn to think differently you can learn to control your thoughts and therefore your fears

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Indigo I'm exactly the same with the gym...I always try and go at quiet times when doing weights, can get away with it being busy when I'm doing cardio as I put my headphones in and can kind of zone out.

Crowds can be my worst nightmare, gives me that chlostrophobic feeling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Anxiety is something I suffer from as well. Not really about meeting so much 1 on 1. But in a group or wanting of talk on the phone I'm not great at

Dude I'm the same...I'm rubbish at talking on the phone, wether it be someone on here, a friend or a number I don't know. Most of the time I'll ignore it."

I can only talk with a few people on the phone. It held me back from applying for jobs and on dating sites or here if people want to take it to the next stage it puts alot of people off as they don't understand it and deem me "fake" which is far from the truth.

But life goes on. I'm trying to be more confident and step out of my comfort zone and go for what I want and make myself happy.

Just need to find someone to join me along the way lol.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"OP you might want to look into CBT, Cognitive Behavior Therapy.

The situations you might find yourself in are fairly normal, you're not backpacking through a nasty jungle with nothing on

What's 'wrong' is how you perceive the situations. And if you can learn to think differently you can learn to control your thoughts and therefore your fears "

Thanks...I'll definitely look into CBT, it's something I've heard mentioned before so I think it's time to read about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I suffer from anxiety, very badly at times. I have found the best way to deal with it on fab and when meeting is to pretend im someone else who is more confident. I can do that for a while

Sounds like a good technique...Sometimes I'm fine with it all but when it's playing up and feels like it's taking over I'll have to try that and see how it goes."

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yeh man I think confidence is key. Some situations I'm brimming with it, not so in others.

Hopefully you do find a cool chick to go on your journey with.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham


"OP you might want to look into CBT, Cognitive Behavior Therapy.

The situations you might find yourself in are fairly normal, you're not backpacking through a nasty jungle with nothing on

What's 'wrong' is how you perceive the situations. And if you can learn to think differently you can learn to control your thoughts and therefore your fears

Thanks...I'll definitely look into CBT, it's something I've heard mentioned before so I think it's time to read about it."

If you can see it through it will definitely help you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey you. I've suffered with anxiety since I was 17. It's quite hard to negotiate it on here, I only ever do short notice meets as I find that if I have something planned I fret and fret and manage to talk myself out of it. The less time I have to worry about it, the less of a state I'm in by the time the meet comes round. But everyone's different. Its trial and error until you find out what works for you I guess.

I find that distractions work well for me too.. so if I know I'm going to meet later or I'm going to a club or whatever I'll draw or read or crochet. Anything that makes me think about something other than the meet. I don't tend to mention it to potential meets in case they treat me differently, I think I'd die of embarrassment. But some people tell their meets. Again it's trying to find out what works for you.

Good luck op x

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town


"Indigo I'm exactly the same with the gym...I always try and go at quiet times when doing weights, can get away with it being busy when I'm doing cardio as I put my headphones in and can kind of zone out.

Crowds can be my worst nightmare, gives me that chlostrophobic feeling.

"

I hate crowds

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hey you. I've suffered with anxiety since I was 17. It's quite hard to negotiate it on here, I only ever do short notice meets as I find that if I have something planned I fret and fret and manage to talk myself out of it. The less time I have to worry about it, the less of a state I'm in by the time the meet comes round. But everyone's different. Its trial and error until you find out what works for you I guess.

I find that distractions work well for me too.. so if I know I'm going to meet later or I'm going to a club or whatever I'll draw or read or crochet. Anything that makes me think about something other than the meet. I don't tend to mention it to potential meets in case they treat me differently, I think I'd die of embarrassment. But some people tell their meets. Again it's trying to find out what works for you.

Good luck op x "

Hey Friggin,

Thanks for sharing I know what you mean about fretting over meets...In the past I've spent a lot of time chatting with girls I like before arranging a meet, sometimes a few weeks/couple of months. I guess I like the comfort factor. I'm not great with spontaneous meets, I usually struggle to agree to them.

It sucks that we should feel like it may embarrass us, I've felt that way before.

Maybe catch you in the chatrooms sometime X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suffer from varying degrees of anxiety, I have to say swingers clubs are one of the environments I've always felt comfortable in although my anxiety can be at ot;s worse beforehand.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I suffer from varying degrees of anxiety, I have to say swingers clubs are one of the environments I've always felt comfortable in although my anxiety can be at ot;s worse beforehand. "

Maybe I'll just have to go for it then...I think what would worry me is not knowing anyone before hand. But if you don't try you don't know I guess.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a mild form of Asperger's Syndrome. I can get social anxiety which makes it hard for me to meet new people whenever I go out which does get me down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep I suffer definitely!!! Sometimes im fine and all is right with the world, then I could have this niggling feeling that I can control with a bit of breathing and luck, other times i'm just floored physically and emotionally.

It's hard work and sometimes it feels like i'm the only one suffering but I know i'm not alone x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest, I absolutely hate my condition. If I wasn't so socially awkward because of it, I wouldn't have any problem when comes to socializing. Its nothing but a curse

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