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general advice please :)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hi,as a new member to this,and yes i know my profile is not selling myself atm,and perhaps even my pics arnt great,but could i ask as to why some ladies friend request you,you accept,send a message and they then proceed to just delete it,and also why ladies send messages asking to meet,you reply politely with a yes maybe lets chat first perhaps,which then also becomes just another deleted message with no explanation.Any feedback good or bad would be appreciated.

Regards.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

oops sorry,wrong area

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Perhaps some ladies want a long friendship list and nothing more. No idea why they would delete messages from you but remove their friendship and move onto people who are happy to chat and meet.

Perhaps they have re-read your profile and have decided they don't like or perhaps its really a man or their pictures are very old and therefore nothing like what they look like now

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

ok thanks for the advice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some women (me for one) are fed up with the guys who keep wanting to "chat". More often than not, these guys just get more and more raunchy with their messages, mainly because they get off on "cyber sex". Often they are married or in meaningful relationships, and have absolutely no intention of actually swinging. What they want is, as they see it, non "cheating" contact with women, while their wife or partner is out shopping or whatever. I am not about to say that this applies to all guys, but certainly enough, that, as soon as a guy says he wants to "chat" rather than arrange a meet, we simply delete the message and more often than not, block the profile.

We agree with all those who are instantly respond with remarks about how harsh we are being. Yes, we are, no question. But, and it's a very big But, it saves hours of messaging back and forth to find the tiny percentage of these particular guys who are actually prepared to meet.

It is, quite simply, quicker to be brutal!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

i understand that dipperqt750,however,if a guy responded with yes lets meet and didnt wanna chat first then surely even thatd be even worse.id assume women/couples would want to check that the guys genuine first somehow before a meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And endless messaging back and forth prooves he is genuine how, exactly?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

who said endless messaging,surely itd be a case of ok,prove yourself mister by msn or cam or a phone number,and take it from there,you wouldnt accept a message of heres my number meet me at so n so pub first..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Few figures for you:

Post one ad on here........1

Receive replys.............250 (average)

Invite 50 to 60 men and get FULL confirmations

Turn up at meet to meet the guys who show up............1 (if you are very lucky)

At what stage shall I start sending messages to meet on cam (which I can't do myself if I'm at work) or chat on MSN (which can compromise my security, ask how easy it is to hack MSN) or start giving out my phone number!

Why should I go to all that trouble?

At the end of the day, a guy asks for a meet.....he sends me a photo and I send him one back, we arrange a meet...it's not rocket science. We ALWAYS meet in a pub first, don't know many that don't.

I don't feel the need to chat, or get to know the guy. This is a site for swingers, "getting to know" to us is more of a dating site thing. Besides, having been swinging for 10 years, and meeting mainly guys, in our experience, less than 10% show for an arranged meet, even if they were verified by MI5!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have to agree with dipper we did a meet and greet a while back there was over 180 who said they were commong on the night there was only 20. It proves f all but that most do bottle it and it gives a bad name to those good ones

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

its all bearing a light now,i see what youre saying,and i agree,tho all i meant was by having a chat is obviously to arrange the meet not to talk about life and the weather.

But,thanks for the comments,appreciated.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

is the lady in question maybe close to home and has recognised you from soemwhere else?

Just an idea as we wouldn't meet on our doorstep due to jobs etcc...

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By *WLondonMixMan
over a year ago

Willsden/DollisHill

Do not worry, you are not alone in the friend invite department. Simply don't add those who haven't the decency to message along with it or reply. Generally give it two days wait for a message and if none if forthcomming delete and move on. As to 'getting to know' and messages, everyone to there own as some prefer long talks via phone cam or a msg others prefer not to ' beat around the bush'.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

im learning quickly,thanks to all comments,cheers

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