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Why the rejection

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By *infulSaint OP   Man
over a year ago

North East

Now I’m not here to cry or sulk, but how does one actually succeed on this site? I believe my messages are polite and my pictures look somewhat decent (in my opinion). But whenever I message somebody it just gets deleted or ignored. I get I might not be somebody’s type, and that’s fine, but surely I’m somebody’s. Been on here for maybe two years with zero interactions with anybody else.

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By *revaunanceCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

Hello OP, what were you doing in Oct 2018 that you are not doing now?

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By *infulSaint OP   Man
over a year ago

North East

Honestly I can’t remember. I did forget I’d posted a similar thing maybe a couple of years ago, I remember reading the advice and tried to improve my profile.

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West

Your profile doesn’t stand out and most of your pictures are a few years old

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By *revaunanceCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

Consider changing your profile pic. No one wants to see your bathroom shelf

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By *ambertMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

Remember there are literally thousands of us single guys on here. Sometimes it also comes down to luck and timing

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By *infulSaint OP   Man
over a year ago

North East

Thanks guys.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Consider changing your profile pic. No one wants to see your bathroom shelf "

It's a very nice bathroom !

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By *revaunanceCouple
over a year ago

Exeter


"Consider changing your profile pic. No one wants to see your bathroom shelf

It's a very nice bathroom !"

It is now he's changed the photo!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"..but how does one actually succeed on this site? "

what do you mean by succeed? It isn't some sort of game show or contest, it isn't a challenge; it's somewhere to hang out with like minded people. If you want to get immersed in the scene then you will have to get out into the world of socials and clubs.

As this thread shows, the forum is the place for interaction; if you are just messaging women looking for vanilla one2one without any result then maybe one of the dating apps/sites is more for you

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

Feel free to take my advice in the spirit it is given. Or ignore. Totally up to you

The most immediate thing you can do to stand out is sell yourself better. I read your profile text and honestly, it reads like tons of other single male profiles on here. What can you say about yourself to make you stand out from the (considerable) crowd?

In terms of media, better pics. Ditch the bathroom selfies, and find better backdrops. Lighting is key. Angles are key. The self timer on your phone/ camera is a godsend.

Finally, adjust your mentality to accept that no one is obliged to respond on here, and the odds of getting a response are drastically reduced as a singly guy, mainly cos there are so many of us on here. If you manage your expectations accordingly, you’ll have way less disappointment.

Good luck fella.

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By *infulSaint OP   Man
over a year ago

North East


"..but how does one actually succeed on this site?

what do you mean by succeed? It isn't some sort of game show or contest, it isn't a challenge; it's somewhere to hang out with like minded people. If you want to get immersed in the scene then you will have to get out into the world of socials and clubs.

As this thread shows, the forum is the place for interaction; if you are just messaging women looking for vanilla one2one without any result then maybe one of the dating apps/sites is more for you"

I’m open to try clubs and stuff, I just thought of that as the deep end. I’m new to all this so honestly not sure how it all works, I am also on tinder where I’m not massively popular but I do get replies and talk to people. I have friends irl who are on this site they tell me about everything they’ve done and how awesome it is and I thought I’d try and give it a go. Definitely not just after vanilla, I get bored too easy. I think the thing is too is I’m easy, somebody wants a fwb thing, I’m fine with that, somebody wants a group thing I’m also fine with that, I’m just here for fun whether that be filth, and sexually, or just something that turns into a friendship, I get everybody’s different with different tastes and interests, I understand what everybody’s saying though. I don’t know, it’s hard to explain what I actually mean.

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By *infulSaint OP   Man
over a year ago

North East


"Feel free to take my advice in the spirit it is given. Or ignore. Totally up to you

The most immediate thing you can do to stand out is sell yourself better. I read your profile text and honestly, it reads like tons of other single male profiles on here. What can you say about yourself to make you stand out from the (considerable) crowd?

In terms of media, better pics. Ditch the bathroom selfies, and find better backdrops. Lighting is key. Angles are key. The self timer on your phone/ camera is a godsend.

Finally, adjust your mentality to accept that no one is obliged to respond on here, and the odds of getting a response are drastically reduced as a singly guy, mainly cos there are so many of us on here. If you manage your expectations accordingly, you’ll have way less disappointment.

Good luck fella."

Thanks, I will take that on board.

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By *rchitectMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

It’s definitely a luck thing,’however much effort you put in. For every woman you have probably a few thousand men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It’s definitely a luck thing,’however much effort you put in. For every woman you have probably a few thousand men."

Yep. I agree with that

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By *JstarsoloWoman
over a year ago

Wombwell, Barnsley

"Why the rejection?"

I think thats the problem right there. Don't see it as a rejection. Just accept the site for what it is. Sometimes you will get lucky, most times you probably won't.

Refresh your profile and pics. Let your personality shine through. But don't rely on this site for a regular bonk.

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By *allyQWoman
over a year ago

Forumtown

The first thing that stands out to me is you say you’re a single male but then say ‘we’ a lot. Who is we?

If I were you I’d have a profile text-write and take some new pictures. You’ve had great advice here on this thread, I’d have a good read through and see if you can make any improvements.

Honestly, there’s little that’s sexy about poor quality mirror selfie of a guy who looks a bit miserable. I’m sure you do better with your pics. There are sone great pics of guys on here, that’s what you’re up against.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Messaging is hard.

The best thing to do is get out to clubs and socials

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By *1876Man
over a year ago

Dudley

[Removed by poster at 11/09/22 22:22:22]

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