FabSwingers.com forum: 27 year old male virgin

By *lujiz94 OP Man
over a year ago

Bishop's Stortford

Hi,

I have Asperger's and serious issues with confidence and communication, especially with women. I'm a 27 year old virgin, and at this point the sexual frustration is almost unbearable.

I fully recognise that this is completely my own problem, and nobody owes me any attention.

I have looked at adultwork for escorts, but I really don't want to remember paying for my first time, and I doubt they would be interested anyway.

I know this might be the wrong place to ask, but does anyone have any helpful advice to help me finally lose my virginity? Or anything at all?

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

Is there such a thing as professionals who who cater for first-timers? I understand you don't want to think of it as paying for your first time, but it's finding the balance between what is easily within your reach and the frustration that you might be feeling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

While I completely sympathise with your predicament OP, I would think that fab isn't going to be the best place to satisfy your needs.

The people of fab are here for their own fun, pleasure and enjoyment and unlikely to be willing to teach anybody.

They're all looking for someone who knows what they're doing.

Add to that the fact that single men have a tough enough time of it anyway, given the huge numbers of us compared to the womenfolk, I very much doubt that this will help with your confidence issues. If anything, I'd suggest it could make matters worse for you.

Sorry to be putting a downer on things but I'm just being frank about how I see things from around 7 years of using this site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When things are back to some sort of normal op pop over to Amsterdam and enjoy a lovely chilled out time away and explore your sexuality as much as your budget allows in a safe friendly environment.

Best of luck.

Tony

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi,

I have Asperger's and serious issues with confidence and communication, especially with women. I'm a 27 year old virgin, and at this point the sexual frustration is almost unbearable.

I fully recognise that this is completely my own problem, and nobody owes me any attention.

I have looked at adultwork for escorts, but I really don't want to remember paying for my first time, and I doubt they would be interested anyway.

I know this might be the wrong place to ask, but does anyone have any helpful advice to help me finally lose my virginity? Or anything at all?"

I have the same problem. It’s incredibly frustrating but honestly if I could go back in time I’d actually save my first time for the right person. The best sex will always be with someone you care about. I’ve been on one night stands and pretty much all of them have been rubbish, because of the emotional disconnect. The frustration and lack of sex I think is symptomatic of not having a partner. I’d prioritise that and trust me, there’s someone for everyone out there, just be honest and yourself. Don’t be a single person like me camming their way into their 40s lol.

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By *9alMan
over a year ago

Bridgend

I lost my virginity with a prostitute although not ideal it was a nice experience, I suspect quite a few shy men lost there virginity with escorts, I have helped a few bi men lose their virginity

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By *lirty-CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Bexley

"Hi,

I have Asperger's and serious issues with confidence and communication, especially with women. I'm a 27 year old virgin, and at this point the sexual frustration is almost unbearable.

I fully recognise that this is completely my own problem, and nobody owes me any attention.

I have looked at adultwork for escorts, but I really don't want to remember paying for my first time, and I doubt they would be interested anyway.

I know this might be the wrong place to ask, but does anyone have any helpful advice to help me finally lose my virginity? Or anything at all?"

Well done to you for raising the issue. Your virginity is precious and if it can't be reserved for the love of your life, it ought to be entrusted to someone who truly appreciates what it means and treats you accordingly. The bets advice we can give is to find someone who is caring enough to ask what is motivating you and will act accordingly. Virginity isn't a stain on you or a slight on your character. It's not something to be given away cheaply no matter how big a deal that may feel at the time. You only lose it once so try your best to find someone who appreciates that fact and treats you and your encounter with the respect you deserve.

We have an adult son in a similar situation to you and we'd give him the same advice. Good luck to you!

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Fab is really tough for all single men and probably could be tougher for you op. I think it's generally better to spread your source of potential partners from more than 1 place, to limit the expectations from any of them and the pressure on you. It's probably not the ideal place for any male virgin.

As you have confidence issues and as a single man who generally find it so very tough here, I'd encourage you to explore other ways you can get to know people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi,

I have Asperger's and serious issues with confidence and communication, especially with women. I'm a 27 year old virgin, and at this point the sexual frustration is almost unbearable.

I fully recognise that this is completely my own problem, and nobody owes me any attention.

I have looked at adultwork for escorts, but I really don't want to remember paying for my first time, and I doubt they would be interested anyway.

I know this might be the wrong place to ask, but does anyone have any helpful advice to help me finally lose my virginity? Or anything at all?"

I just read your profile. State this on your profile, be totally open and honest about yourself. And your intentions. I've seen many profiles of girls who are shy and with limited experiences and they are looking for someone like yourself. However I've also spoken to ladies (around 40) who's profile come out as really hard core but then when she opened up to me she wasn't at all, she was actually really nice.

And when you do go on a date, just have a good time, imagine you're with one of your male friends, but be a gentleman ALWAYS. Don't think about sex on the date. You'll have to go through a lot of dates before it really does happen (but then again it might happen on the first). It's a life's journey, a roller coaster ride. I went though loads of dates, some really nice some not so nice.

Join more than one site. Try at least 3 dating sites. It gives you more chance to find someone nice. Unfortunately in the world of online dating we the men have to do all the work of writing to the girls.

One of the most important tip: if a girl let's you pay for everything then she's not interested in long term or in you, if that's the case head for the fire exit. Obviously don't just leave her, but have an excuse. Always have a backup plan to bale out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry I meant '40' as in her age.

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By *lint-EverhardMan
over a year ago

Perpignan and cap

My ex has a real problem with Asperger's. I was her second ever lover and she was about your age when she got with me. Because of the lack of non verbal communications skills flirting and body language was and is very difficult to read, thus I just asked her if she wanted to have sex. She said yes and the rest is history. We've since split because of the lack of communication.

If you want some advice, if you like a girl say "I like you, would you like to go on a date with me"?

Be open to her straight away about having Asperger's... Tell her because she'll think that you're shy/quiet.

If things go further ask her "would like like to have sex"? Use words as tools to make things happen.

Good luck.

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By *lujiz94 OP Man
over a year ago

Bishop's Stortford

Thanks for the advice guys (and a bigger thanks for not taking the piss lol)

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"Thanks for the advice guys (and a bigger thanks for not taking the piss lol)"

No one should ever mock you

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By *lujiz94 OP Man
over a year ago

Bishop's Stortford

"Thanks for the advice guys (and a bigger thanks for not taking the piss lol)

No one should ever mock you

Thanks, I was really worried about posting this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some great advice from everyone on here for you OP. I hope it works out mate. Good luck.x

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By *lujiz94 OP Man
over a year ago

Bishop's Stortford

"Some great advice from everyone on here for you OP. I hope it works out mate. Good luck.x

Thanks

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By *lujiz94 OP Man
over a year ago

Bishop's Stortford

Thanks again for the kind messages as well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are professionals who cater for disabled. 27 is still young. If it’s still eating at you and you lack confidence then it’s a possibility. But wouldn’t advice you to do this either way. It has to be your choice. There’s always the possibility of interest groups and try meeting people who share similar interests. Use your situation to your advantage, that your old fashioned and looking for someone with traditional values. I’m recovered from cancer and damaged neurological system which affected my mobility/balance/immune system for years and stopped me from being able to get out, so a very late starter through no fault of my own. Just couldn’t care less.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never been someone's first. Tbh, the first time is always kinda anticlimactic, I'd say focus on building relationships with people. Happy to chat if you wanna pm me x

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By *venturerMan
over a year ago

Bodmin

Fab is confused with dating sites,it is not! Having said that I have met lovely partners who still meet me for sex spanning many years. I would suggest volunteering and joining hobby/activity clubs and meet people in a vanilla non sexual context, I have met more sex partners in the real world than on fab. Good luck!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When things are back to some sort of normal op pop over to Amsterdam and enjoy a lovely chilled out time away and explore your sexuality as much as your budget allows in a safe friendly environment.

Best of luck.

Tony"

^^^^^^^^^ Defo do this OP... You'll have a variety of options...Many peeps have popped their cherries in such ways...i.e escorts etc

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By *isssexysensualityCouple
over a year ago

Harrow

"Hi,

I have Asperger's and serious issues with confidence and communication, especially with women. I'm a 27 year old virgin, and at this point the sexual frustration is almost unbearable.

I fully recognise that this is completely my own problem, and nobody owes me any attention.

I have looked at adultwork for escorts, but I really don't want to remember paying for my first time, and I doubt they would be interested anyway.

I know this might be the wrong place to ask, but does anyone have any helpful advice to help me finally lose my virginity? Or anything at all?"

Pride comes before a fool. Just get an escort dude. Virginity is overrated. In many regards it's better to get an experienced professional to break you in.

In life, there comes a point where you have to realise what is real and what is not.

None of us had a perfect start in life. Accept it, deal with it and fix what you can. Put your ego to the side. I lost my virginity to an escort pretty late like you. Was the best experience of my life (little did I know I would have 100s of mind blowing experiences in the following years). I'm glad my losing my virginity felt like an hour long full blown pornographic experience, rather than an awkward and bad experience with a vanilla girl.

Get an escort. You really won't regret it, especially as you get older and see the world for what it really is rather than what media & other controlling elements of society have brainwashed you to see the world.

Don't waste all your money though, just enough to get a little experience and a little exploration. Warning: sex is highly addictive lol.

Good luck, it sounds like you're very close.

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By *lujiz94 OP Man
over a year ago

Bishop's Stortford

Thanks, But I would really like to have sex with someone who wants me, and is not just doing it because I paid them, at least for my first time

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By *9alMan
over a year ago

Bridgend

"Thanks, But I would really like to have sex with someone who wants me, and is not just doing it because I paid them, at least for my first time"

the better escorts do enjoy their work its not just about the money, people pay for other personal services hairdressers people who cook food etc

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By *ecretescapeCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire

"Thanks, But I would really like to have sex with someone who wants me, and is not just doing it because I paid them, at least for my first time

the better escorts do enjoy their work its not just about the money, people pay for other personal services hairdressers people who cook food etc "

Absolutely.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was 28 by the time I lost my virginity, as I am hard of hearing and sometimes my speech lets me down I was a nervous person with no confidence until I met my first girlfriend through work. I still get nervous but found just being yourself with a sense of humour works. Don't try too hard and something will soon come along. I don't expect to find much fun on here but love the banter etc.

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